"Hey Ruka! How have you been?!" I typed out, smiling to myself as I pressed 'enter'. The reply comes quickly, as I knew it would.
"Oh, it's been all right, Mikan. Summer, you know." Of course Ruka'd say something polite like that. He never complains.
"Okay, you're fine. What about Natsume? How're he and Sumire holding up?" Truth was, I was really worried. My friends Sumire and Natsume had been going out since her most recent birthday. All three of us: Ruka, my best friend Hotaru, and I had been wondering about it. Ruka was also Natsume's best friend, so he saw and talked to him more, especially on summer vacation. But, the thing is, even though they'd been dating for a couple of months now, neither of them put much effort in it. Sumire had already called and complained to me about it, but there wasn't much I could do other than listen. I'm not very good with talking about relationships.
As I snapped out of my memories, I realized he hadn't replied yet. "Ruka? Is something wrong?"
"... Gotta go, Mikan..." he replied, then I got a message from the site saying that he had left the chat. Ruka? What's going on?I stood up and stretched, thinking of what could have happened. Frowning, I texted Hotaru, asking if I could come over. She replied that I could, as long as I didn't bug her too much. After walking to her house, she let me in, muttering about wasted time.
"Hotaru!" I squealed as I leapt at her, but she shot me down with her baka gun. I quickly got up again, already used to it, but I still pouted. "Aw, Hotaru! I haven't seen you for a week-and-a-half since you went on that vacation to Washington!" She looked at me with a blank expression.
"Idiot. Just tell me what's with the sudden visit?" I continued to pout as I followed her to her kitchen where she was eating a crab. I internally sweat-dropped, but just continued sulking on the outside.
"I can't come visit you just because I want to?" I questioned moodily. She continued eating her crab, unperturbed.
"No, because if something wasn't wrong I would've told you the truth: that I was too busy to have you come over," she said matter-of-factly.
My face grew a tint of red as I questioned, "Busy eating crab? Really, Hotaru?" She looked at me with that blank face, but I could almost hear her saying "Just get on with it." I sighed. "Something's up with Ruka. I was chatting with him, but then he suddenly stopped talking. When I asked him, he just left." Hotaru rolled her eyes, never having stopped eating her crab.
"It couldn't be because you annoy him as much as you do, me."
"That's not it!" I said defensively. "You don't think I'm annoying, Hotaru!" She leveled her gaze with me.
"I'll obviously not be able to get anything through to you. So, pray tell, why you don't believe Ruka cut you off is because he found you annoying?" I looked down, blushing. I hope Hotaru won't shoot me for interrupting her lunch for dating problems. "Mikan." She ordered.
"I asked him how Natsume and Permy's relationship is going, and he stopped talking." As I feared, I heard the resounding BAKA! and the massive air pressure knocked me down. I got up again, brushing my skirt, and looked up. "Hotaru! Meanie!" I complained.
"Speaking of," She said calmly, but I was surprised to hear annoyance and hurt somewhere in there, " why didn't you tell me that they broke up?" I stared at her, uncomprehending. "Just because I don't outwardly show interest, they're kind-of my friends too."
"Wait-Wait!" I said, holding out my hands, palms out. "They broke up? Since when?" She looked at me, surprised, and lowered her baka gun.
"You didn't... know?" She questioned, hesitant at asking me a question. I shook my head.
"Why did you think I would know?" I asked curiously.
"..." She looked at me, then the baka gun, glanced at her phone, then looked at me again, dropping the weapon in her hand. "Sumire called me a couple of days before the vacation. She told me that they broke up. She made it sound like I was the last to know."
"You weren't," I assure her. "Huh, it kind of hurts my feelings Permy called you before me. She's known me longer." Hotaru shook her head, mumbling "Idiot" and finished her crab. When she was done, she ordered me out of her house, saying she had more things to do besides "Entertaining an idiot who would just distract me." I walked home, looking at the noon sky. It was approximately 12-1 o'clock. When I arrived at my destination, I quickly logged into the chatroom, and was interested to see Ruka was back.
"Ruka! Why'd you leave earlier? Why didn't you just tell me Natsume and Permy broke up?" I typed away as quickly as possible, in case he tried to log out the second he saw me on.
"Mikan..." He typed back. I waited, impatient. "Natsume keeps saying he doesn't want to talk about it, but he's become even more of an introvert. I knew that if I told you, you'd most likely come straight here." My eyes widened.
"You're at his house now, Ruka?"
"Yes, but he doesn't notice much anymore. I think he's in shock. Mikan, if he doesn't get better, can you come over and visit tomorrow? He's really down."
"Of course! You're right about one thing, I'd come over sooner or later. How did they end it?"
"Shouda ended it." For some reason, as I imagined Ruka typing this, I imagined his eyes narrowed in hostility. I shook my head; Ruka was never angry. "She posted it on Facebook, and Natsume probably never would've seen it if I hadn't told him." I winced and sucked in a breath as I typed out my reply.
"*wince* harsh"
"I know it was attention seeking behavior"
"ugh. That SUCKS..."
"Yup. Sorry Mikan, I have to go. I'll tell you if he gets better. If not... see you tomorrow?" I smiled, albeit a bit sadly.
"Yeah, Ruka. See you tomorrow. Even if he does get better, I'm coming over tomorrow." Then I signed off before he could protest. I breathed out and leaned back in my computer chair. Now to hear the other side of the story. I picked up my phone and accessed my contacts, looking for the name I so rarely dialed. It rang a couple of times until someone picked up.
"Hello?" In the background I heard The Lazy Song playing. I shook my head and answered the voice.
"Hey, Permy, it's me, Mikan. I was wondering if you wanted to come over to my house and hang out...?"
"Mikan!" Permy squealed, slamming open my front door as her mom drove away. "We haven't talked in SO LONG! Geez, it's summer break, why can't you find the time to call me?!" She was hugging me so hard... I can't breathe. I pushed her away, panting heavily.
"Permy! Calm... Down..." I wheezed, coughing.
"Are you okay, Mikan?" She asked worriedly, patting my back. I straightened out, gave one last cough, and looked at her.
"I'm fine, just no more tackle-hugs, all right?" She nodded, then started her non-stop babble.
"Okay, Mikan. It's just been so long, though. Especially since I almost never see anyone on summer break. I usually spend all day listening to music on my computer, and watching T.V.! Koko's gone on vacation, so I don't see him much anymore..." She trailed off.
"Anyone else?" I prompted.
"Oh, Mikan, you probably don't know, but me and Natsume broke up awhile ago!" She exclaimed. I looked at her dead-on.
"Oh, I know. Although, it kind-of hurts my feeling that I had to hear it from Hotaru."
She bit her lip, "Mikan, I'm sorry. I was just talking to her and suddenly I just blurted it out without thinking. And by the time the call was over, I just didn't think about it..." I sighed, disappointed in her lack of excuse.
"Fine, Permy. So, how did it end?" I wanted to know if she changed it at all in her benefit. I hoped she didn't, but Permy...
"I ended it," she replied. That wasn't a lie. "It just wasn't working out. I couldn't handle waiting for him to call, or waiting to be asked out on a date. I told him, I said 'You can take me anywhere, I don't care at all!' He wanted to take me out to a fancy restaurant, but I didn't want him to use all that money on me!" I looked at her, calculating. From her point of view, I guess I could see her point, but if I looked at it from Natsume's point of view... I groaned.
"Permy, why in the world did you end it through Facebook?!" That's the most nagging question I have now. "Nat never checks Facebook!" She blinked.
"He has a Facebook! What do you-"
"Sumire!" I exclaimed, interrupting her. "Yes, I know Nat has a Facebook, but he never goes on. He probably still wouldn't know if Ruka hadn't told him!" She looked at me, almost horrified.
"Oh... Maybe it wasn't the best idea, then." I face-palmed.
"You think?" I sighed. "Oh well, what's done is done and all we can do now is pick up the pieces. But tell me; how long have you known it wasn't working out?"
She thought about it, "I guess... maybe a week or two after we started?" Woah! What now?
"What?" I gasped. She nodded absentmindedly at me.
"Yeah. We just weren't communicating like we should. I figured 'Maybe, since I'm his first girlfriend, he just doesn't know how it works. It'll work out given a couple more days.' But it just didn't. And I didn't know what else to do other than end it." She shrugged helplessly, and I had to pinch the bridge of my nose to keep from scowling. Yeah, but on Facebook?
"Why did you even ask him out in the first place?" I groaned out. She looked at me regretfully.
"Honestly, I'm starting to ask myself the same question. I don't even remember why anymore. It was just all a stupid mistake. The only times I saw him were the two times that you, Hotaru, and that one time with Ruka were with him." I watched her, keeping my face straight. Then, I turned around and sat down at the computer, opening an internet browser and typing a phrase into the search browser. As I typed, options came in the drop-down screen and I clicked on one.
"Mikan...?" She asked, hesitantly. We watched as Facebook loaded.
"Oh, and Ruka thinks you're action of posting the breakup on facebook was attention-seeking." I informed her as I scrolled down, ignoring the posts I had from people I didn't know.
I could imagine her face turning bright-red as she spluttered, "That's not- but I- no!" Then I heard her sigh. "I suppose Ruka hates me now, doesn't he?" I shrugged noncommittally, preoccupied. Then I found what I was looking for. I read it, then spun around to look at her, not completely smothering my enraged expression. She looked scared as she asked, "Mikan?" I closed my eyes and composed my face, massaging my temples. I looked at her again, more calmly.
"'I'm Single again, smiley-face, *sigh* relief!'?" She looked chagrined. "That's how you say: We're over?!" I waited for her to try and explain, but after a couple of "I..."s, I gave up. " Sumire... where in the world did you get the idea that it was okay to post this type of thing? On top of that, post it this way?!" No answer, just down-cast eyes. At her look of depression, I threw in the towel. Hotaru always did say I was the most forgiving one. I sighed deeply, then spoke. "Never mind, Permy. Here, why don't we just play a board game? Your pick." She scurried out of the room, and as she looked through the options I went on my Pandora. We played the game she chose, Scrabble, as we listened to different songs. After we finished an official game, we dumped the letters and started spelling dirty words, then song titles. I froze when I heard a certain song start playing.
"Mikan?" She had noticed. "What's up?" I tilted my head to the side and listened closer, thinking.
"Just that, it's rather ironic that this song is playing." She looked confused, then turned to look at the computer screen.
She was puzzled as she turned back to me, "Why's it ironic? It's just Three Days Grace's 'Let it Di- oh." I nodded in confirmation.
"A lot like your situation, isn't it? Anyway, we can do 'hello'..." And so we continued the game, but when the chorus would come around, she'd mutter. It went something like this...:
It's not fair when you say that I didn't try,
"You didn't."
I just don't care about you anymore
"Obviously." It got to the point where I was glad when the song was over. We finished up, and started a game of chess (don't ask why). When it was her turn, I got bored and went to the kitchen to get us a glass of water each. When I came back, she'd made her move and was staring discontentedly at her phone.
"What's up?" I asked as I set down the glasses.
"Nothing.." She said, still slightly frowning as she dropped her phone and grabbed the water. I looked at the board and made my move. She was obviously distracted and didn't put much thought into making a move. "Hey, mom wants me to come home soon..." She said, staring off into space. "Can I go after this game is over?" I sighed.
"Then you'd better call your mom now and tell her to come pick you up." I said, glancing at the clock, which read 9:42 p.m., and made my move. She looked at me, confused.
"What...?" I sighed.
"Let me repeat myself, you'd better call your mom now and tell her to come pick you up." I tapped the piece I'd just moved; my queen. "Checkmate."
~Just a short amount of time passes~
"Bye Mikan!" She called as she walked toward her mom's car. I waved slightly at her, and made to close the door. "Mikan.." I heard her shout.
"What?" I shouted back, and noticed she had stopped moving away, looking at me with a slightly longing look.
"Can you tell him..." I looked at her, questioning. "Can you tell Natsume to call me? At least so I can explain? He won't pick up." She must've seen my confusion. "I tried calling him earlier. Can you tell him to call me?" I stared at her.
"He's become even more of an introvert..."
"He doesn't notice much anymore. I think he's in shock... He's really down"
"Shouda ended it." How I pictured Ruka's face as I read that. "She posted it on Facebook, and Natsume probably never would've seen it if I hadn't told him."
"If he gets better..." How I had received no new messages the entire time Permy was here...
"I don't know, Permy." I said finally. "I just don't know." And I closed the door before I had to deal with her reaction.
~Night passes~
Groggily, I hit the alarm button. I had set it for 9, ever since I woke up at noon and mom scolded me. I fumbled around, showering, dressing and getting ready for a new day. I squinted at the clock: 9:47. Not bad, I guess. I slumped into the computer chair and logged on, finding a new message waiting for me. I woke up quickly as I read it.
"No change. Whenever you're ready." It was from Ruka. Slightly frowning, I quickly logged out and shut down my computer. I quickly made my out, leaving a note by the computer telling mom and dad that I was going over to Natsume's. When I arrived, I rang the doorbell, feeling a bit nervous. What would I find? The door opened, and there stood Ruka. He saw me and his face broke into a relieved smile.
"Mikan..." He sighed, and stepped aside to let me in. I walked in and smiling softly at Ruka, I made my way to Nat's room.
Well, It wasn't as bad as the worst-case-scenarios I'd been imagining, but still... it was pretty bad. He was at the computer, playing Minecraft. He loved that game, but I never understood why someone would enjoy such a pointless game. I cleared my throat, but he didn't turn. Impatiently, I walked over to his chair and spun it around.
Blank. Empty. That's what I thought the second I saw his eyes. He stayed watching the space where his computer had been before, then focused on me.
"Mikan..." He said, recognition barely creeping into his voice; it was mostly emotionless. "Why are you here."
"Ruka told me you were doing badly." I stated, watching his reaction. None at all.
"What exactly did Ruka say." There was no curiosity in his words. Just like someone reading the words off of a paper. I now understood the look I'd imagined on Ruka's face; the longer I was with this emotionless Natsume, the more I wanted to rip Permy apart, limb from limb. Rage leaked into my tone.
"He said you'd become even more of an introvert. He also said you were most likely in shock, and you had been since Permy broke up with you." Real recognition flashed onto his face, and he stared at me like I was his lifeline.
"Sumire? Have you talked to her? What did she say?" He abruptly stood up, and I jumped back, completely startled. He lost balance and barely caught himself. What in the- he- he's totally out of it! I've never seen him like this. Honestly, it kind of scared me. Hesitantly, I walked forward towards where he was swaying.
"Natsume, why are so..." Realization struck home. "How much have you moved these last couple weeks?" He pitched forward but caught himself on the desk. "Ruka!" I called, panicking. What if he hurt himself? Ruka came running and caught Natsume before he could lose balance again. He turned to look at me, wide-eyed.
"How'd you get him to stand up? The only way he's gotten around these past few weeks is moving to the computer when he's not completely aware. I have to drag him to bed at night." froze and stared horror-struck at Ruka, the blood draining from my face.
"It's THIS bad? Why didn't you tell me earlier?!" I hissed, frantically helping Ruka drop him into a sitting position on his bed.
He shook his head and repeated, "How'd you get him to stand up?" Natsume answered his question for me.
"Sumire? You talked to her?" He asked hoarsely, attempting to stand up. Ruka and I pushed him back down without much effort.
"You actually said her name in front of him?" Ruka hissed at me. My temper flared up.
"No one's gonna get anywhere if we avoid the topic! Running away doesn't help at all! It's the coward's way out. You need to learn how to face problems head on, and so does he!" Then, ignoring Ruka, I turned to look at Natsume. With him sitting on his bed, we were almost at eye-level with each other. "Natsume. Yes, I talked to Permy. Do you want to talk to her, too?" Ruka looked like I'd thrown him out of a window. Natsume kept watching me. "Do you? Nod yes, or shake or head no." I felt so utterly helpless, watching him slowly nod. "Okay, I'll call her. Let me talk to her for a bit, and she's all yours." As I walked out the room, I added as an afterthought, "While I'm out, walk around a bit. Ruka, can you help him out?" I didn't waste time looking at Ruka's scandalized expression. I pressed redial on my cell-phone and stepped onto the back porch.
"Hi! Sumire here!" I wasted no time.
"Permy, you're totally right. Ruka loathes you. And I have truly mixed emotions right now."
"Mikan?" She stuttered, "What do you mean?"
"He's doing terribly! Ugh, It's painful to watch! You have to talk to him, but I swear, I will never talk to you again if you say it's his fault!" I got a brilliant idea. "Speaker! You'll be on speaker!"
"M-Mi-?"
"No negotiations!" I scampered back inside, where I found Natsume shuffling about in a pacing line with Ruka's help. Ruka looked at me with a very wide range of expressions, a lot of them rage directed at the phone in my hand. "Okay!" I exclaimed, and Natsume turned to look at me. I opened my phone. "You are now on speaker." I told Permy.
"Gosh, Mikan! You didn't even let me say anything!" Permy's voice rang through the room. "And what do you mean speaker?!"
"Sumire." Ruka's voice was stiff, polite.
"Now, now, Ruka," I chastised. "We're not in this conversation. I only have it on speaker so Permy won't say anything wrong." I paused, and looked at Natsume. "Say 'Hi' to Permy, Nat!"
"Natsume..." I heard Permy breathe. That shocked him out of his stone-like impression.
"Sumire!" Natsume tripped over his own feet trying to get to my phone, but Ruka caught him on the way down. I held the phone away from him.
"Oh no, mister!" I scolded. "No manhandling my phone, ya hear? How about we all sit down here," I said, gesturing toward a circle of armchairs around a table, "and I'll put my phone on this table here. How does that sound?" I didn't wait for an answer as I sat down on the farthest armchair available and set down my phone in front of me. Hesitantly, Ruka and Natsume took their own chairs- Natsume to my right and Ruka to my left. The latter looked like a wary, caged animal, but Nat never looked away from my phone.
"Mikan..." Permy's voice was hesitant, quiet. It was clear she was trying to just speak to me. " I said I wanted to talk to Natsume, not the whole group!"
"Oh, Permy. We're not all here. I called Hotaru earlier and she said she'd already bugged the house, so she's still listening, but she's not here here," I told her reassuringly.
"So... I can't talk to Natsume alone? You and Ruka have to be there and Hotaru has to listen?" Permy demanded.
"Yep," I said breezily, not even bothering to look and see Ruka's nod of accommodation. "It really is your fault for making such a mess of the whole thing, Permy. So go ahead," I gestured vaguely, temporarily forgetting she couldn't see me, "talk away." It was silent while we waited for someone to talk.
"So, Natsume, how have you been?" Permy sounded like she was trying to keep things casual. Nat shrugged noncommittally and I nudged him with my foot, reminding him that she couldn't see him.
"Fine, I guess. Not much has really been going on." He informed her, his voice stronger and steadier than I'd heard it all day. From Ruka's shocked expression, I could tell he was thinking similar thoughts.
"That's all right then, isn't it?" She asked, sounding reassured. "Mikan told me you weren't doing so good, but it seems like she was just blowing it out of proportions again." I 'hmphed' as Nat threw an accusatory glance at me. He's the one who's all over the place, I thought sourly.
"Nothing's wrong." He said shortly. Ruka snorted.
"I beg to differ," he muttered under his breath. When Nat looked at him, he stared right back until Nat finally had to look away. This was, after all, the best friend whom had been taking care of him for all the time he had been 'fine'.
"She said you wanted to talk to me. What about?" Natsume was back to the poker-face he usually had on, but at least his eyes weren't empty like before.
"Well-" she sounded slightly nervous, " I wanted to- um- apologize for-er- breaking up with you that way. And I wanted to know why you thought I broke up with you, to make sure we were on the same page." At the mention of how she had announced the breakup, Ruka had opened his mouth angrily. I kicked him none-too-subtly, but Natsume didn't seem to notice our silent exchange.
"Wasn't it because you were bored with me?" Natsume asked blankly. Internally, I face-palmed; oh, geez. Permy sounded horrified.
"No! No- that's not it at all! I just didn't think it was working out... that's all." Her voice had become very small.
"Why did you think that?" Nat asked calmly. In his eyes, I could see his mind at work, trying to figure it out.
"It's just that..." she started, reluctantly, "well, did you think we were acting like a normal couple should? Even though we go to different schools, we could've worked something out!" She stumbled over the last "we". I guessed that, if she hadn't had three listeners, it would've been "you". That didn't help my mood. Since Nat was staying quiet, I broke my own rule.
"Permy..." I started, letting my disappointment seep into my words. Nat looked at me, and out of the corner of eye, I could see Ruka looking at me, too. "Why is it Nat's fault? You said Nat wanted to take you out, but you were the one that trashed that idea. No one is a mind-reader. How was he supposed to know whereyou really wanted to go? If you trash an idea, you have to offer a different option."
"But I did!" Her defensive voice sounded on the edge of hysteria. The two others in the room directed their attention towards the phone on the table. Ruka snorted.
"You can't be serious!" His voice was acidic. "You were serious about it that time you said 'Take me to a hot-dog stand or something. Hell, take me dumpster-diving for all I care!'?" I glanced at Nat for his reaction, Ruka had to be making that up, but, he continued looking at the phone, waiting for an answer. No way.
"Of course I was serious!" She snapped back.
"Permy!" I was annoyed now. "Have you ever seen a hot-dog stand where we live?! And... dumpster diving?! Even I can't believe you were serious!"
"But Mikan! What was I supposed to say?"
"If you didn't like fancy restaurants, you could've told me which restaurant you would rather eat at." Ruka and I were shocked into silence when we heard Natsume speak again. After being shocked, I smiled happily. Thank goodness, Nat was back!
"I... I didn't know I had to say anything like that. I never had to before." I stood up at these words. All three of us reacted. Nat was annoyed, Ruka was enraged, and me? I was pissed. This was an all-time low. I picked up my phone and spoke into it.
"You'll do to remember, Sumire, that even though you apparently are the magical dating expert, this is the first time for all of us. Don't assume things!" And I snapped the phone shut. When it closed, I pointed it accusingly at Natsume. "And you! Are you done being a zombie over this idiot?!" Ruka stood up, palms raised in a placatingly position.
"Mikan, it wasn't Nat's fault-"
"No, Ruka, you're wrong." I interrupted him. "True, it wasn't all Nat's fault that Permy broke up with him. But he sure as hell shouldn't have gone and become some freaking lifeless doll! Not over her!" We were glaring at each other, but then the silence was broken by Natsume.
"Wait- what? Lifeless doll? Over Sumire?" We both stared incredulously at him.
"Nat," I could tell Ruka was trying to calm down." You've been acting like a zombie ever since we found that post on facebook." Nat looked at Ruka for a minute, glanced at me, then burst out laughing.
"You're kidding! That's why you called Mikan? You told her it was because of Sumire?" He doubled over. Ruka and I exchanged glances: who knew Natsume could laugh this hard? "Dude-" Nat choked out, "sure, maybe for a couple of days, it was over her. But I mostly got over that. I was playing the new version of Minecraft! You know, they updated it?" He went back to laughing, and I stared at Ruka. He looked back at me, and he looked as dumbfounded as I felt.
Then, after a second, we broke into laughter too. What's so funny? Honestly, I'm still asking myself that. We finally had to stop so that we wouldn't pass-out laughing. I was on my feet first, breathing heavily, but conscious. Ruka was on his way, but Nat hadn't been in the best of shape to be 'rofl'ing. Minecraft. What a silly reason to let your body deteriorate, you know? Shaking my head but smiling all the same, I gave Nat an arm-up. He shot me a small smile but I rolled my eyes at him and proceeded to help Ruka up, just so I wouldn't show favoritism. Even if this was the guy who had scared me to death the second I walked into his room.
"Never." Ruka got out as he got to his feet (with my help), "I mean never mislead me like that again, Natsume."
"Or else-" a voice came from the door, causing me to brighten up even more, "you will be in a boat-load of pain, Hyuuga. As Nogi says, never mislead us like that again."
"Hotaru!" I squealed, running to hug her. While I was on the ground wincing from a shot from the newly-updated baka-gun, I heard the reply.
"I won't, Imai. I won't.