((Disclaimer: I do not own Ouran High or the song "I Want Candy" by Bow Wow Wow.))

The Host Club of Ouran High is a prestigious association consisting of members from the higher enchalence of society. Each gentleman is well knowledged in the fine arts of etiquette, public socialization, and the female desire. Of course, not all females have the same yearnings. For instance, some swoon in the want of a knight in shining armor, a prince charming to sweep them off their feet. Suoh Tamaki fits the fairy tale mold with his perfect blonde locks and wide blue eyes and sweet, gentle temperment set off by his charm and honey soaked words.

Then, in opposition, is Ootori Kyoya, the 'cool one'. His attitude is indifferent and superior and often mistaken as the 'I'm too cool' attitude. Who doesn't love a 'cool' guy?

Next, there is the Hitachiin twins, Hikaru and Kaoru. They are little devils and win girls over with their bad behavior. Also, for the girls who already have a taste for the forbidden such as these 'naughty' boys, they become delirious with joy when the two express a love for one another far deeper than just that of brothers.

Fujioka Haruhi, though technically a female, is thought to be of the male gender amongst her fellow classmates. The girls adore him, er, her for the sensibleness and good listening ear she possesses. Plus, she is cute for a peasant.

Then there is Morinozuka Takashi, the silent mystery man adored for being an enigma and his constant care of his cousin, Haninozuka Mitsukuni.

This toddler-like boy is just like a child and oh-so cute. He is easily moved by emotion and whimpers with wide forlorn eyes if he is not permitted to have the sweets he desires. It is difficult for any to resist his cuteness; however, for those who do not fall for the quivering lip, they become acquainted with the painful talents of the world's greatest martial artist.

I know a guy who's tough but sweet

He's so fine, he can't be beat

As usual, the Host Club was preparing for another one of their gatherings for the lovely ladies of Ouran High. Today the theme was that of a jungle safari. All the hosts were dressed like adventurers ready to travel into the unknown, Indiana Jones style. Of course, Kyoya had the task of making sure everything was set in its proper order while the others did... well, whatever it was they did. But one person was missing, the shortest yet eldest of the group, Mitsukuni, or better known as Honey. Luckily, none had to worry for long as he bounded up gleefully displaying his bunny dressed in safari attire.

Suddenly, a gaggle of girls filtered into the club's music room #3 and eagerly huddled around Honey proclaiming their love for the cuteness of his bunny. Honey beamed his innocent smile and said shyly, "Bun-bun is pleased you like his outfit, but he's dressed for a dangerous mission." The flock gathered nearer in wide-eyed anticipation. What possible danger could a cute fluffy bunny dare against? What could a beaming boy like Honey, so sweet and fragile, do against danger? Often times it was forgotten that he possessed almost otherwordly skills in the martial arts.

He's got everything that I desire
Sets the summer sun on fire

Honey announced with glee that there was to be a treasure hunt. Eyes grew wide around as the girls asked if it were diamonds or gold or rubies. Honey shook his head avidly at each guess and declare with serious passion, "Candy!"

I want candy

All the girls giggled chiding theirselves aloud for not having guessed the quest to be for sweets. There would be no treasure more satisfying than a chest full of sugar to please Honey. And so the troop of gals followed their sprite of a leader taking careful direction from his pink bunny. As always, Morinozuka followed close behind while the rest of the hosts tended to their guests. Of course, many of the girls not a part of the adventure curiously quiped their assigned host about what Honey was searching for.

"I'm not quite certain." Haruhi curiously watched as well wondering what her senpai could possibly be seeking. With a sigh, she offered the only plausible answer, "He's probably looking for some candy."

"Oh, Honey does love his sweets!"

"And he is so sweet, too!" The girls giggled at their cleverness and watched as Honey searched high and low for the sugared delights. Nothing was beneath the couch nor behind Tamaki, who was completely confused as always and now curiously looking on, nor was their anything to be seen from perched atop Mori's shoulders.

Go to see him when the sun goes down
Ain't no finer boy in town
You're my guy, just what the doctor ordered
So sweet, you make my mouth water

After about fifteen or so minutes of fruitless searching, Honey's eyes began to water and a soft whimper escpaed his forlorn lips. All the girls gathered around the despairing Honey including those who had been previous observers. They begged Honey not to cry and asked what was the matter.

Honey replied, "I... I... I want candy!" By this time he was in sobbing tears. Some of the girls hugged and assured him he would have some soon while a troop of females scoured the music room for any sign of the treasure.

They found nothing.

I want candy

Mori patted Honey on the head and said, "Do not cry, Mitsukuni. I will find your candy."

Naturally, the girls were besides theirselves in admiration of Mori's tender care and concern for his cousin. Now while Mori searched for the treasure, the girls asked Honey what they could possibly do to cheer him up.

His short reply was, "Candy."

One girl suggested a trip to the beach.

Honey declared there was no better place than the beach to eat candy.

Another girl suggested hot cocoa.

Honey said he prefered chocolate bars.

Another suggested Honey to be her boyfriend which caused an all out war amongst the females each declaring themselves the only one suitable to alleviate Honey of his depression and serve him dinners of candy after their marriage.

Honey just moped away in want of nothing but candy.

Candy on the beach, there's nothing better
But I like candy when it's wrapped in a sweater
Some day soon I'll make you mine,
Then I'll have candy all the time

Luckily, as the battle raged and the host club watched on, Mori returned with a big chest.

"I do wonder where that came from. I don't remember ordering one." Kyoya eyed Tamaki accusingly.

"I didn't order it!" Kyoya scoffed hardly believing that Tamaki hadn't wasted club money on some stupid novelty item.

As the two parents bickered, Honey eagerly rubbed his hands in eagerness while the twins slowly backed away.

Honey opened the chest.

The chest was empty.

After crawling into it and finding not even a gumdrop or lollipop, the water works began once more.

Sighing at the chaos about her (the 'parents' fueding, Honey crying, the girls fighting), Haruhi noticed the twins nearly out the door. Suspecting them of foul play, she stopped them before they could leave.

"Hikaru. Kaoru. Where's the candy?"

"We do not know."

"Yes, why should we know? It's not like we told Honey about the treasure chest..."

"... and then forgot to put candy in it."

Haruhi slapped her palm to her forehead and gave the two a menacing glare that turned into one of surprise as Honey suddenly pounced onto Kaoru's head.

"I want candy."

"We-we don't have any."

"Then you shall die."

I want candy

The Hitachiins ran for their lives as Honey chased them with a vengeance. Kyoya and Tamaki were still bickering while the females were now cheering for/supporting their favored host in either battle.

Mori suddenly appeared next to Haruhi in his quiet manner nearly scaring her to death.

"Mori-senpai, is there nothing you can do?"

"No. When Honey wants candy, he won't stop until he has it."

"I guess I'll go to the candy store then."

"Hai."

"I WANT CANDY!"

"DON'T KILL US!"

"Please, hurry, Haruhi."

I want candy