Erase This
Summary: In which the Evil Queen has a very … interesting conversation with her prisoner, Belle. Just to clarify, this is set in Fairy Tale Land, not in Storybrooke. It takes place some time after the events of "Skin Deep."
Sometimes, she watches her.
She has not spoken one word to the girl since she captured her, this Belle, this girl with the heart-shaped face and shining eyes who is apparently Rumplestiltskin's true love.
She does not enter her cell to taunt, or gloat, or to attempt to extract information. It would be a fairly pointless exercise, after all.
The girl is a valuable chess piece, little more.
Belle spends some time shouting, some time banging on the door, but eventually, she tires of that, and settles down. Regina sees that she is fed and relatively well taken-care of. No sense damaging her.
Not yet.
She watches as Belle begins to mark off the days, trying to keep a sense of the passage of time. She watches as she paces in her cell. She watches as she sings to herself. Regina watches, and waits for her to start musing out loud, perhaps even reveal something useful. But the girl is cleverer than she would have given her credit for, and she seems to suspect that she is being observed, and so takes pains to speak none of her thoughts aloud. It's likely that she doesn't have anything of consequence to divulge anyway, but still, she is a plucky little thing. It's almost admirable, in its way.
She supposes it's one of the things he liked about her …
Eventually, Regina gets sick of looking at her determinedly stoic face. I won't let you hurt him, she seems to say silently. I love him.
I love him, and he loves me.
Of course he does, Regina thinks, and sneers, and ignores the sick feeling in the pit of her stomach.
In the end, she takes to magically depositing books the girl's cell. To keep her mind from going soft, she tells herself. She wants the girl intact, because after all, a broken chess piece cannot be moved across the board.
And when her face is buried in a book, she doesn't have to see the absolute certainty of true love shining in Belle's eyes.
It takes Regina by surprise, however, when Belle starts calling out to her.
"I know you're watching me, your majesty!" the girl shouts on occasion. "What do you want?"
The first few times she does this, Regina simply glances at the nearest mirror, rolls her eyes, and then walks away, allowing the girl to continue to ramble about true love and strength and happy endings and other ridiculous notions, without paying her any mind.
One day, however, Belle says something that stops the Evil Queen cold.
"Are you afraid to face me?"
There are several very creative obscenities hurled at Belle's reflection before Regina can compose herself.
But when she makes an appearance in the girl's cell, she is the picture of calm.
"I don't think I'm the one who should be afraid, child."
"I'm not a child! And if you're not afraid, then why haven't you faced me before?"
Regina laughs. "Oh, but you are a child. You have a child's notions of hope and happiness. And to be perfectly honest, my dear, you simply haven't been worth my time to bother with yet. Frankly, I'm not sure you are now. You're little more than a bargaining chip to me."
"You can't keep me –"
"Locked away in a cell? I know, it's so horrid of me. And yet, the last time someone did this to you, as I recall, you fell in love with your captor. I must say, I hope it's not a habit of yours." Regina leans in and smirks at her. "I'd be flattered, of course, but you're not really my type."
She has the satisfaction of seeing the girl flinch, and she leans back. Still, Belle seems determined. "I won't help you hurt him."
Regina cackles. "You say that as if you have a choice."
"No matter what you do –"
"You should be thanking me, you stupid girl."
Belle is incredulous. "Thanking you?"
Regina leans in again, but this time, she isn't smiling. "Rumplestiltskin uses people, my dear. He uses them, and then he tosses them aside. He makes you think he actually cares for you, and then he …" She stiffens suddenly, and pulls back from Belle.
The look in the girl's eyes makes her heart beat faster. She doesn't like how perceptive her naïve young gaze seems.
"He loves me," Belle says determinedly. "I know he does. The kiss was working."
Of course he loves you. Regina concentrates on keeping her voice low and even. "Maybe so. But his power means far more to him than you ever could."
"No it doesn't! Maybe that's what he told himself, but it's not the truth." But she can hear a note of doubt in the girl's voice now, and she grins wickedly.
"Are you so sure?" Regina laughs to see the look on her face. She feels much better now. She turns on her heel, and begins to walk towards the door. She wants to leave her just like this, in darkness and in doubt.
"It's not the truth! He just didn't think I could love him, but he was wrong! You don't know his heart! You don't know him like I do –"
Regina whirls around. "You think you know him?" She hisses. "You played his housekeeper for a few months and you think you know him better than I? I spent years at his side learning magic, and you think you can claim to know his heart because you spent some time dusting off tables and smiling sweetly at him? You think you can –"
Regina stops herself when she realizes Belle is staring at her, with her mouth agape. She stops herself, but it's too late. She's said too much, far too much.
Belle is her prisoner. She is free, and Belle is chained to a wall. She is a queen, and Belle is just a girl. She has magic, and Belle has none.
But in this moment, it is Regina, and not Belle, who is truly afraid.
"You … he taught you?" Belle asks softly, and Regina scowls.
"We made a deal," she says icily. "I told you, he uses people. But that doesn't mean he can't be used in return. I wanted to learn magic, so he taught me. It was a business arrangement."
Belle shakes her head. "You weren't talking about it like it was a business arrangement."
Regina is beginning to feel sick. Her hands clench into fists, even as she scoffs. "I don't know why I came here. You are utterly tedious and a complete waste of my time. You're lucky I keep you alive."
She turns and opens the door to the cell.
"You … you loved him," she hears Belle whisper.
Regina flies across the room at her. The girl's back hits the wall as she grabs her by the throat.
"Take it back!" Regina screams. "You take back those filthy, disgusting words, or I swear, I will end you!"
"I –" Belle gasps, flailing, trying to pry Regina's fingers off her neck. It's like all those years ago, when she fantasized about strangling sweet young Snow.
Only this time, it's real. This time, the girl before her really could die.
It takes all of the Evil Queen's strength to remember Belle's value as a chess piece. To remind herself that this isn't her style.
It would be better and more fitting to take the girl's heart, if it comes to that.
Regina lets go of her.
Belle coughs and sputters. She sits down, breathing heavily, and when she looks up at the Evil Queen, her shining eyes wide and full of shock, Regina is certain she finally has her cowed.
"I won't take it back," Belle says softly. "It's the truth, I can see it your eyes."
This is not happening. Regina feels herself begin to shake.
"I loved a boy named Daniel. A boy whose heart I saw ripped out, whose life I saw ended right in front of me. Rumplestiltskin … took advantage of my youth and my grief. I just wanted to learn magic, but he … he took me, he took my …"
My virginity. My innocence.
No. No, that's not right. I gave it to him. I gave it all to him. Willingly. Ever so willingly …
He said that we belonged together.
"He … he made me think that he cared about me … he made me think I could feel …"
"That you could feel love again," Belle says softly.
"That's not true," Regina gasps. "I hate him, I hate him. I never felt … that. Not for him."
"Then why are you crying, your majesty?"
Regina puts a hand to her face and feels the wetness there. The tears continue to spill down her cheeks as she closes her eyes.
"Forget," she whispers.
"What?"
Regina opens her eyes and raises a hand to Belle's face. He touch is gentle, almost tender.
"Forget," Regina repeats, in a firmer voice. "Forget this conversation. Forget everything I said, and everything you said. Forget I ever came to your cell. This never happened, do you hear me? You will erase this from your mind. Do you understand?"
"Yes," Belle says, in the blank, obedient tones of one who has been placed under a powerful enchantment. "Yes, I understand."
Regina nods. "Good. Now sleep. Sleep, and forget."
And Belle does.
Regina backs away from her slowly, and then turns and sprints out the cell door.
She has nothing to worry about, she tells herself. Erasing memories can be a tricky business, but she knows she's done it correctly. Belle won't remember any of this.
And she … well, she can't perform the spell on herself, but she will do her best to forget.
Regina is very good at using magic. She is also very good at forgetting things that need to be forgotten.
She learned from the best, after all.