Title: Will This Love Keep
Author: Mina Robins
Fandom: Tierra de lobos
Pairing: Crisabel
Rating: T
Summary: Cristina and Isabel Lobo escape from the precarious Land of Wolves and venture into the world outside the reign of the men in their lives. Acceptance was nonexisting in this age and their love was the most dangerous sort to indulge in. Here are the moments that collect into a story as they continue, their lives are not easy, will the sacrifices made be worth the freedom to be together?
…
Cristina wanted to let her tongue run free, to allow unaltered truths throttle Isabel's husband into reality. Isabel had shared how Jorge explained that he was the only man in his platoon able to train a feral Arabian stallion. The animal was as beautiful, wild and stubborn as her Isabel and Jorge wanted to capture that liveliness and own it. He was not dictator, if anything he was the most considerate soldier among the harsh breed of men that flourished in this part of Spain. Though he was not completely sinless in this convoluted affair, he was not unknowing of the ominous presence of Antonio's will exerted onto Isabel's action, but he had been so desperately alone in this hell of hidden daggers and political treacheries. He had taken a fae thing for a wife, someone that was not meant to be caged by any man's will and would never have submitted if not threatened into being a lame creature, ready for capture. Isabel had been made pliant under the duress of coercion.
He had wanted what no one else was able to control, though most of all he just craved something to albeit the hollowing desolation that was human loneliness. He had not expected to feel such solitude when he took up the option to marry Isabel; she was at intervals fervent then frigid toward his approaches, he felt as a beggar for the scraps of affections, surely a man of his standing did not deserve such disorienting treatment, especially not from his wife. No matter how untameable she was, he had thought he had done well in his attitude towards her actions.
The changes she had done were not enough, mere concession of her conduct was only a start. He did not revere in the mere fact that Isabel obeyed when he forbade her to ride with those that searched, did not understand how much of a drain it was for her to accept sitting idly by, stewing in gut wrenching nerves at the jeopardized livelihood of her nephew. She had to place her faith in him to provide security for her family instead of securing it herself.
He had lost his way, unable to comprehend how there was such distrust in his own home when he so diligently kept the loyalties of his troops and order in his ranks. He was a sweet, well-tempered man that only asked what was obligated to him, what he thought would gradually become easier to attain. The coaxing spirits fill his belly with courage, confident that once he rid this town of the harlot devil before him it would mean his marriage will fall back into place. Isabel was his and he'll graciously and honourable allow this nonsense just this once because he is a good man. He had an inkling of the…hardships he'll have to conquer when he entered into this agreement. He has never failed before in his endeavors and will not accept failure now.
Cristina swallowed her pride when Jorge labelled Isabel as his wife, she knew that Isabel would not truly allow such a title if not spoken from her; at least she hoped that to be the truth. She could understand how easy a life with Jorge could be, it could all be fixed still, there was still time. If Isabel renounced their love, banished it from ever returning and accepted the normalcy that was expected in one of her breeding. It could be a possibility to their story, an ending that would break her heart worse than anything else she's already endured. She was so tempted to voice her disagreements towards Jorge; she wanted to break his fragile hope if just to selfishly build up her own frail belief in a love that could not have been meant for someone as lowly as her. She watched as he scooped up his jacket and realized that this was her last chance to have a voice, to no longer hold silence. She felt the scorching injustice fester in her insides, burning at her heart and rushing up towards her throat, clawing to be let out. She opened her mouth but then closed it abruptly when she felt a movement in her belly, it was far too soon for such a feat but it was accomplished none the less. She could imagine the weight of their child in her arms, his squirming would earn that sweet laughter from Isabel and his life would be cherished and protected by both his mothers. She was startled out of her reverie when Jorge slammed the door closed behind him.
She'll go to her grave defending the fact that her infant had saved their family's future.
…
The run to Sanabaria took a full fortnight, if they could have traveled faster, Isabel's fretting prevented them from accomplishing it. As hurried as she was to reach the safety anonymity would provide them, she was just as concerned for Cristina's health. After collecting a starting amount in Villegos, they've carefully traded small amounts of the jewelry as they traveled. They did not want the place where they intended to remain to think they had too tempting a financial sum. Two women were an enticing mark for those that wanted an easy target and wealth. Isabel was wearing herder's clothes to disguise themselves as a normal couple from those afar, but they had to be just as cautious of who they sold their wares to. They needed to leave no trace of where they had been. There couldn't be a path that led to where they intended to go since the results would be disastrous. Isabel was more aware of the jewelry's worth but her method in trading was too urgent and her style too straight forward for her to fetch a price worth selling. Cristina was better versed in handling the men, weaving tales of a grieving and pregnant widow that had no money for her both her husband and father's burial due to the constant skirmishes that now plague the lands due to the rebellions. Isabel was both impressed and a tiny bit concerned on how much she truly meant to Cristina. She felt terrible for harbouring such thoughts when Cristina was more than willing to do absolutely anything to give her peace of mind. Her lover had been willing to risk her life a second time to rid the child in her womb just to earn back Isabel's favour. Isabel would never allow that to happen, she wouldn't be able to deal with both her lover's and child's life being lost. She was prudent in reminding herself what lengths Cristina would take, how they both were striving for a future together with the little they had.
Currency may have a slipping and rising worth but the expensive jewelry will keep its value for the days to come. They kept half of the savings, painstakingly hidden away in secret compartments of their saddles and sewed pouches. Cristina had to sew the pockets since while Isabel was capable of creating the hidden compartments, her seamstress skills made it evident where their clothing had been altered. Cristina had giggled and teased Isabel while the Wolf's daughter sought out their dinner for the evening.
Around the quiet night time fires, under the cover of night, Isabel ran her fingertips over each line and curving of her mother's jewelry. She spent the silent moments memorizing the colour of the prized grey pearls and the weight of each shinning silver and gold ring that has been imbedded with precious colour gems.
"I'm sorry that you had to give so many up." Cristina should be asleep in their tent but she isn't, it's hard to rest in the chilly nights without her lover next to her.
Isabel immediately tucked the pieces back into the folds of her vest and then clasped her hands together in a fruitless attempt to hide her attachment to her mother's possessions. Isabel was silent as Cristina sat herself down onto the open blanket. Her hand immediately wrapped around Isabel's shoulders, her fingers combing into the small bit of hair that was free from the tight braid. Cristina leaned against her companion, her free hand falling onto Isabel's thigh.
"I never really had an opportunity to see these." Isabel supplied after tenure of companionable silence, she turned and pressed a kiss to Cristina's forehead, holding the touch there for a long moment, cherishing the freedom to show such affection even if it was in these empty plains. "We had so little time to be with mother, but she always allowed me to play with the pearls and silver that adorned her, when she passed away, father locked every single finery that reminded him of her, from the jewels to the dresses," Isabel turned back to the fire, contemplative and a little saddened, "if there was one thing in the world father could possibly care a bit more about than power, it would've been my mother."
Isabel shifted out of Cristina's loose hold so that she could lie down onto her partners lap, her eyes focused onto the flickering flames and the back of her head pressed against the slight swell of the baby bump. "I feel selfish for stealing these things away from my sisters, from Rosa that has not even seen the vibrant earth shades in my mother's eyes."
Cristina stoked the back of her fingers along the curve of Isabel's aristocratic nose, wondering if these emotions would once day cause Isabel to resent her, for a life with only them and none of the family that Isabel had been blessed to be surrounded by.
"I have no memory of my parents; I grew up in an orphanage in Andalucía." Her voice is soothing and gentle, only accompanied by the subtle pops and cracks of the twigs and branches of their fire. "I cannot begin to understand how it must feel to be separated from your family like this..." She would admit to being a self-seeking, wanting woman, she had only ever planned for herself but to see Isabel in such distress made her emotions tangle and bind around her heart. "If you regret coming here," her voice cracked at this point, "I could understand if… if…"
Isabel immediately sat up, alert and awake from her milling thoughts when she realized how troubled Cristina had become. "No, Cristina, no, look at me," she cupped her hands around her lover's trembling jaw, "I will never regret this decision, you're my life, this child," she placed her palm against Cristina's stomach, "will be our family, I hope to be this child's mother as well as your wife."
"Isabel…" Cristina closed her eyes and tilted into the warm caress of the slightly coarse hand; the once soft skin calloused by the days of hard labour in the stables. "I could not feel more committed to you if I tried, I took your words as a promise on that day, I consider us together even if matrimony is not a possibility."
"We are married in our hearts and we are a family, are we not?" There's desperation in Isabel's tone and Cristina quickened to assured her that she was correct with a firm nod.
"I love you." Cristina leant forward to kiss her partner, grinning as she felt Isabel's lips turn up into a full blown smile.
"And I love you, that was something I need to amend most, I have been so anxious of others finding out and thus placing you in danger that I've not been able to tell you how I feel… I want to tell you how much I love you every single moment of our life together."
"Isabel, when did you get such a silver tongue, do you charm all the ladies like this?"
"Oh what, no, I would never, it's only ever been you and it's not just because you loved me back or were the first woman, the moment I set my eyes on you I knew that I would love no other with the this fervor in my heart."
Cristina smiled, something gentle, the teasing smirk gone as Isabel candidly declared her feelings. "Show me you love me with action; let me feel your skin against mine." She let her hand slipped through Isabel's top, her digits brushing against the heartbeat that she hoped sounded for her only.
"Out here?" Isabel glanced nervously into the darkness and blushed at the habit that felt ingrained in her now. "Sorry."
"Shhh." Cristina worked her fingers into the ribbon that kept Isabel's tresses in a braid, letting the mane free and coaxing her hand through the mess of wavy hair. "Let me love you now."
"If you allow me the same luxury." Isabel placed her hand over the one Cristina pressed against her heart.
"Always."