Chapter 001: In which Kuwabara is beaten up by strippers.

"Come ON, Hiei," spoke a familiar spirit detective of slicked-back black hair. "Kurama agreed to go. Why're you being so difficult? You can not leave us alone with Kuwabara."

"Yusuke," the rather short fire demon sighed, exasperated by the situation and halfway glaring at the male opposite him. "Don't you have some human friend you can invite to this? More importantly, someone who isn't me?"

"Look. Two guys go, it's just as bad as going alone. Hell, I was going to go alone, but Kuwabara found out about it and invited himself. Kurama agreed to help me out, and if you go, too, he'll just disappear and find some other area to be in so we don't 'cramp his style'," Yusuke shot back, slowly becoming slightly desperate to get Hiei to go with them. "Come on. I already got an I.D. For you."

Sighing, Hiei rested his hand over his face for a moment, his brow knitted. How do I get myself involved with these things?, he thought to himself before finally looking up at Yusuke, annoyed. "Fine," he finally replied. "But if Kuwabara gets on my nerves too badly, I'm tossing him out a window."

"Fine," Yusuke agreed, grinning like the idiot Hiei felt like the detective was being. "We're going in an hour, once the sun's down. Meet us at my place – I'll come find you if you don't show up." His grin spread just a little wider, and he headed back to his house while the fire demon he'd just suckered into going to a strip club with the three other males shook his head and headed off in another direction.

That hour later, an obnoxious red-headed pompadour banged at Urameshi's door, smirking. He was determined to do something, and not one of the other three men knew what it was. Oh, he would definitely show Yusuke up this time, he wouldn't know what hit him! So distracted he was in his thoughts that he didn't even notice a red-haired fox demon walking up behind him, raising an eyebrow at Kuwabara, who was smirking to himself and muttering to himself on top of it. Not that it was odd or anything, the pompadoured self-proclaimed badass often did things like that, complete with rather oddballed body language, complete with his arms to his sides, but his forearms out, and a rather...disturbing look on his face while he spoke nonsense to himself.

"...Kuwabara," Kurama spoke, his brow knit in confusion. "...You're doing it in public again." Walking carefully around the rather absurd human, he knocked twice softly upon the door before twisting the knob and stepping inside and leaving his shoes before the ledge out of habit. "Yusuke," the red fox called out softly, thankfully having a voice that carried. "I think we may have to go and get Hie-, never mind," he started to say before the edges of his consciousness started to pick Hiei's signature up. "He's on his way now."

"Great!," the great spirit detective said with a grin, blinking as he spotted Kuwabara outside. He gained a flat expression while looking at the rather unwelcome guest in tonight's escapade. "Kuwabara, you gonna just stand out there all night?"

Some time passed, and the four males were having a mixed time at that club they'd gone to. Hiei, of course, refused to engage in any of the typical strip club behaviour, seeming annoyed that he'd been made to go. Even more annoyed, he was, at the fact that Kurama seemed to have slipped off somewhere, and hadn't been seen for about an hour. What was more, the fire demon couldn't even remotely find the fox's aura or signature anywhere. "That bastard left me here with these two," he muttered, noting that Yusuke was keeping tabs on him. Sure, let Kurama leave, but actually watch me, he thought to himself, glaring at the back of the former delinquent's head hotly enough that his hair bursting into flame wouldn't be without the realm of possibility. Taking just one sip of the glass of water sitting in front of him, he actually choked a tiny bit upon hearing Kuwabara spouting some nonsense about every girl in the place being a succubus.

"All of them, I swear it! This place is full of succubuses!," the slightly orange pompadour exclaimed, ignoring the dirty looks he was getting from most of the patrons. Yusuke, on the other hand, had to sit down due to the large amount of laughter he just couldn't contain.

Hiei even laughed a bit under his breath – if the detective's little friend hadn't been so inept, perhaps he would have noticed that one dancer in particular was, indeed, a succubus. She (a woman that was known by the name of "Mel"), unlike Yusuke, was not amused even in the slightest bit. She stepped down off of her stage and toward Kuwabara. What happened next had Hiei actually laughing – the stripper who stepped off her stage engaged in a full assault against Kuwabara that he just couldn't seem to defend against. With a pre-bloodied nose, Kuwabara quickly fell onto his back in time for the security team to grab him and "gently" escort him out the back door and into a slightly rainy alleyway. His vision fuzzy from hitting his head on the pavement, he blinked through fuzzy vision, watching someone or something run out of the alley before hearing Yusuke's laughter coming through the back door. Hiei had split as soon as the attention was on Kuwabara, leaving the two males there alone together.

"Dammit Kuwabara," Yusuke tried to say between laughs. "Strippers aren't succubi. Why would they do something that obvious? You moron." He grabbed Kuwabara by the elbow and pulled him up to his feet.

"I mean it, Urameshi!," Kuwabara insisted, his face serious once he could see straight. "You seriously didn't sense even one of them! I-"

Yusuke just laughed at him. "The only demons I sensed in the whole place were Kurama and Hiei and they both ran off somewhere."

"Your senses must be screwed up, then!," Kuwabara shouted while being pulled down the street by a rather amused spirit detective. "There had to have been at least four succubuses-, succubi, in that place! We gotta warn someone at least!"

Yusuke just laughed a little harder. "Fine, Kuwabara," he said, thinking that Koenma would get a kick out of this. "We'll go see Koenma and let him know that strippers are succubi apparently," he agreed, wondering where the annoying red pompadoured idiot would stop.

When he wouldn't get off of it, the two found themselves in Spirit World, Kurama agreeing to go along for the ride and quite forcefully dragging Hiei along. Without waiting, Kuwabara dashed into Koenma's office, tripping over a bit of rug (that was really Yusuke's foot) before getting to the desk.

"K-Koenma!," the male exclaimed as he tried to recover and got himself back up to his feet. "There's a club filled with demons right up the street from Urameshi! Wha-"

Kuwabara was interrupted by Koenma smacking his palm to his face. "They're not succubi," he said flatly, causing Yusuke to snicker into his hand. "There's only one we know of, and she's not a threat. Go home."

Before any of them could really do anything about it, they were basically expelled from Spirit World, and landed pretty harshly in the middle of Yusuke's house. Kuwabara got up and went to say something, only to be kicked out a window by none other than Hiei, who glanced at Yusuke as he was blinked at. "You did say I could do that," he said, shrugging and exiting the building.

[[I know, weird start. They're not all going to be off the wall like this one, I promise!]]

[[[Obviously Yu Yu Hakusho and the characters aren't mine.]]]