When I wake up, it's beside him. He's still asleep, looking like a soft angel. My hand skips out to rest on top of his chest, feeling it rise and fall. His coco-colored skin melds with mine. I take this time to let my eyes feast on him. He's my world, after all. I've only just imprinted, but that doesn't seem to matter to him. I tried explaining last night, but he didn't seem to understand what it meant. I'm hoping that he'll do what's right, since the stories I heard about him have been less than kind. But when I saw him last week, that was it. Each of my connections was gone—Seth, the pack, Mom. None of it mattered anymore. I have him now.

I haven't phased since then—I don't know what the pack would think, but I don't really care. I just don't want to hear the jabs. I should tell Jacob tomorrow that I've decided to stop phasing. After all, what if he wants kids? And Sam's theory is that we imprint on who will best carry the gene.

Hm. Sam. I wait for the familiar jolt of sadness, pain, betrayal, anger, bitterness; but none of it comes. That name has no connection for me anymore. I can still see him, but there's nothing there anymore. Relief washes over me in a wave.

I smile as he wakes up. His chocolate eyes register me. I feel a jolt of anxiety—did I do something wrong? I stop smiling. It doesn't seem to help any. "Good morning," I breathe out. The sun dances over the bed, illuminating us and our world.

He doesn't respond. He tugs away from me, and I recoil. It's automatic; it's the best thing I can do for him to be happy. He rolls out of bed and starts to get dressed. I watch him, saying nothing. It will be the first of many mornings like this.

Time passes. Jacob and the pack were upset when I told them I stopped phasing, saying I couldn't do that to them. I reminded Jacob of exactly how much time I had sacrificed for the tribe and he shut up. He was leaving soon with the Cullens anyway. If I kept phasing, I would have been integrated back into Sam's pack when he left. Better that I stop phasing, even though every time I walk by I see hurt in their eyes. It would have bothered me once, but not now.

And him—he continues to elude me. I keep trying, and every once in a while I am gratified with a night with him. But we never have a relationship beyond that. Sometimes he asks me to do things for him, and I do, no matter how difficult. Repair his car personally? I'll study everything so that I can. Play Beethoven flawlessly? I'll practice until my fingers bleed and beyond. Get him a mask for a Halloween party from Italy? I'll be there and back in two days, vampires be dammed. He seems to enjoy my obedience.

But I miss him when I'm not near him. I follow him—he knows I do. I just need to see him and make sure that he's alright. I don't even mind that he's with other girls in front of me. I'll be whatever he wants, and be grateful for that much.

Time passes. My old life is a hazy memory, all of it. He keeps testing the limits of the imprinting. He asks me to steal for him. Would you like the Mona Lisa? He asks me to drive a getaway car for some of his friends. I'll drive so fast I break the sound barrier. I know what he'll want eventually. I know he can't stand me anymore.

"Leah," he says, contempt and hate in his eyes. "I can't stand you face."

I immediately turn away from him and pull my sweater up over my face.

"I can't stand you," he continues, contempt obvious in his voice. "You are worthless. You are pathetic. You are nothing." They are the words from my past life's nightmares. Does it sting? I can't feel anything behind the pain I'm causing him with my presence. "I think the world would be better off without your stupid little self, don't you?"

I find myself nodding. "How?" I ask.

"Car accident. Into a tree. Into a mountain. Into the ocean. Into another car. I don't care." I would do all four for him if he hadn't given me the choice.

"Can I leave a note?" My words are muffled, but he seems to understand.

"Now, now, Leah," I can hear the contempt in his voice, "I don't think so. I don't think your family needs anything at all to remember you by. Will you give me all of you things? Leave them to me?"

"Anything you want," I tell him. He shoves and pen in my hand and a slip of paper under it. I sign; it could be my death warrant, but that doesn't matter now. I'm condemned anyway. What do I care? Just a signature.

"Anything I want," he repeats. "Go now, Leah. The next time I see your ugly face, it better be a picture in the obituaries."

I nod. I can't see him through my sweater. "I love you. Forever." It doesn't matter that I say it now. I have my orders.

"Leave!" he snaps. Oh, anything to obey his voice! I turn and run down the stairs. Once out of his eyesight, I pull the sweater down so that I can see again. I dig my car keys out of my pocket and slide in. I roll down the windows as I start it up. It is a beautiful day, but with my new resolution I can't notice anything else.

The sun warms my skin as I drive out of town. I think of nothing besides my orders. How should I? Another car comes speeding in the opposite direction. My hands tighten on the wheel as the urge to swerve into it overcomes me. As much as I want to obey, I don't want to take another person out with me. The orders were for me and only me. I just have to get into a fatal accident.

I drive northwest. If I don't find something, this road ends at a cliff overlooking the ocean. It will be easy then. My craze eases slightly as I make the decision. Do I listen to music? Do I hear the birds chirping? The wind rushing past my ears? I don't know. I can't hear anymore.

It's minutes, maybe hours before I reach the end of the road. One last thing to do. It is a straight shot for about a mile—I accelerate even faster. How fast am I going? It must be over 100 miles per hour now. I won't get arrested for it. I press the gas to the floor of the car. The cliff's edge approaches quickly. I crash into the flimsy guard rail and take part of it with me. I am airborne, flying for my last few seconds of life. I unfasten my seat belt. I won't need it. The ocean, speckled with rocks, is flying closer and closer. Just a second, maybe two.

The car hits the water. I feel cold, see nothing, and then fade.