It's a Wonderful Life
Chapter One: Cain and Able
Canada's birthday was supposed to be special. He wasn't supposed to spend it … like that.
Everything had been going fine at first; Cuba arrived, and then Ukraine (*sigh*… Ukraine….) Things only really started to go wrong when England arrived.
"America, I didn't know you were already here."
A vein pulsed in Canada's forehead. Well, at least he remembered that it was Canada's birthday and not America's. The practically invisible nation stepped aside to let his father in.
"Actually, Dad… it's Canada…."
England covered his mouth with his hand and closed his eyes. "I am so sorry, Canada…." He said, walking over the threshold. "Really, you and he just –"
"Look alike, I know."
"Are you kidding me?" said France's voice from behind England. The Frenchman pushed England forward so that he may also enter the house. "They don't look a thing alike! Canada was blessed with my hair! America wasn't! Actually … America didn't even get your hair… he looks more like Finland…."
The two began to squabble and Canada closed his front door. Family gatherings… yay… (sarcasm). Canada could feel the first migraine of the evening coming long before England began cussing his ex-lover out.
"He does not look like Finland! America is my son! And I didn't cheat on you! Not that you can say the same!"
"What? It's my nature!"
"Yeah, just like it was your 'nature' to take his side during his little rebellion!"
"Oh, don't give me that! You're the one who -!"
Most arguments started like this, or at least ended like it. Canada was getting tired of hearing them talk about how France sided with America… or how France was a pervert… It was getting old.
And it was Canada's birthday.
"H-hey, guys?" Canada said, twitching, "Can we, uh, not talk about, um… past affairs?"
England snapped out of his angry rampage. "Oh, I'm sorry, Canada. It's your birthday; we shouldn't be arguing."
Damn right.
England spotted Ukraine and, being absolutely terrified of her brother, decided it was best to find a spot to sit farthest away from her. France, on the other hand, took a seat right next to her. Canada frowned, and sat on France's other side to prevent him from saying something too perverted.
Of course, China had to bring Hong Kong over. Hong Kong and Canada weren't 'close', per se, but Hong Kong valued family and Canada was his half brother. Besides, he would always listen when Canada would talk… or maybe he wasn't really listening. You could never truly tell with Hong Kong.
"Hi, America aru…." China said when Canada opened the door. Canada's eye twitched.
"Happy Birthday, Canada…." Hong Kong said, handing Canada a box full of firecrackers. China blushed, realizing his (and everyone else's) mistake. Canada smiled at the two, accepting the box, and letting them inside.
"I-I'm so sorry, Canada aru…." China began to apologize.
"No… I'm… used to it…."
Seychelles arrived not long after, glomping her big brother. She handed him a giant fish before running off to glomp their favorite father: France. England wasn't practically pushed aside… he was pushed aside.
"Seychelles!" he complained, "What's wrong with you? You, Sealand, Canada… will you lot stop trying to copy your brother America? He's an idiot!"
Of course… things always went back to America….
Seychelles stuck her tongue out at England. Canada sighed.
Next came Sealand and his adoptive parents, Finland and Sweden.
"Hi America!" Finland said. Canada felt to his knees, not looking at the trio.
"It's… Canada… Ca-Na-Da…"
Finland blushed. "Oh, I… I'm so sorry, Canada…." Sweden just nodded.
"Cheer up!" Sealand said, wrapping his little arms around Canada, "It's your birthday!"
So why does everyone think it was America's?
England tried glaring at Finland and Sweden, but only ended up sighing. "H-hello, Sealand…"
"Hi, Bastard England!"
England sighed again. "Just like his big brother…."
Canada stood up. "I am nothing like that!"
England gave Canada an um-uh-that-is-I-didn't-mean… look and Canada understood. America. America… again….
It's always America!
"Oh… I… get it…." Canada said through gritted teeth. He gave a fake smile to Finland and Sweden. Sweden crossed his arms, a small pout on his lips. Obviously, he was still in a mood after Toronto beat Stockholm in gay pride*. But hey, he wasn't going to keep Sealand away from his brother just because of that.
"Please have a seat, Finland… Sweden…" Canada said, gesturing to the living room. China quickly grabbed Finland and started up a conversation with the smaller nation and Sweden sat and listened to the conversation.
As Canada was about to sit down, the phone rang. Thinking it was probably Egypt who had yet to arrive (though, by God, if Egypt could hold a phone conversation, Canada was America's 51st state […which he isn't…]) he went to the kitchen and picked up the phone.
"Hello? Bonjour?" Canada said into the phone.
"Hi, America! Sorry! I can't make it to your birthday on the fourth! I just wanted to say happy birthday!" said the voice of Spain.
Canada's teeth gritted together. He calmed himself and then said in the happiest possible voice: "I'm sorry Spain, but this is Canada."
"Oops. Wrong number." And without wishing Canada a happy birthday, the Spanish nation hung up. Canada sighed, kicking the stove before hanging up the phone. Unexpectedly, the phone rang again before Canada could even get out of the kitchen. Canada sighed and picked it up.
"Hello? Bonjour?"
"Hi America! This is Italy! Um, Germany and I can't make it to your birthday party this year…. I was just letting you know!"
Canada sighed. "Um, Italy? It's… Canada…"
"Eeeeeeeh? I'm so sorry Canada! I didn't mean to! Um… uh… um… I'm SORRY! DON'T BE MAD!"
Canada forced a laugh, trying to calm Italy down. "It's okay, Italy… Really, England calls thinking I'm America all the time…" Which was annoying….
"Oh, um… well, I'm sorry, Canada…"
"It's alright…"
"Um, it's just…."
"Yes?"
"Who are you, exactly?"
Canada sighed. "America's brother."
"Oh… do you have his phone number?"
"Yes…."
After setting Italy straight, Canada hung up the phone, feeling a little worse for wear. By some strange twist of fate, the phone rang… again…
"Hello? Bonjour?"
"Spain you damned bastard! Seriously! I'M calling him back, you son of a -!"
"Hello?"
"Oh! Hi, this is Romano."
Canada raised an eyebrow. "Hello, Romano. I was just talking to your brother."
"Why were you-? Oh, never mind! I was calling about that bastard Spain! I'm sorry he just hung up on you like that. It's wasn't nice."
"It's fine…"
"Anyway, uh… so, who are you?"
Canada hung the phone up without answering Romano.
In a completely stupid way, the phone rang once again! Canada debated actually answering it, but then decided he better.
"Hello?" he asked tiredly.
"Like, heeeey, America~! This is, like, totally Poland. I'm calling to see if you, like, know were Lithuania is. Russia told me he wasn't home, ya know? So is he, like, at your house?"
Canada mumbled something about not being America and hung up the phone. It rang again and Canada picked it up, shouting "What?" into the speaker.
"Hey, America! It's -!"
Canada hung up the phone and disconnected it.
Seething, Canada grabbed a glass from the cabinet and poured himself some whiskey. Canada didn't drink much, but he figured it was about time he took a leaf out of his father's book.
Why was everything about America? America wasn't so great! Canada knew him best! And Canada knew that America was selfish, rude, disloyal, disrespectful, obnoxious, abrupt, flashy, sulky, tacky, arrogant, snobbish, lazy, wasteful, ignorant, insensitive, and brainless! Just to name a few! And Canada …
Couldn't … couldn't … STAND HIM!
It was around the time that Canada swigged down the whiskey that the doorbell rang. He began walking toward the door, but apparently Ukraine had answered.
"Oh! Mr. America!"
And any sanity Canada had left was gone.
Canada marched into the entry hall. America had bent over to whisper something in Ukraine's ear, something that made her go pink and shake her head.
"No, no! Not yet!"
"America…." Canada said threateningly, shoulder's trembling.
America looked up, not sensing the ominous feeling radiating from his brother. His blue eyes lit up behind his glasses, smile brightening.
"Hey, Cana-!"
"Get out."
The entire atmosphere seemed to change with those two words. Everyone stopped what they were doing, and turned to look at the trio in the hallway. England stood up.
"Mattie, what is the matter with you? It's your brother!"
France rolled his eyes. "This coming from the man who was dreading seeing America today. Weren't you actually debating not coming so you could avoid seeing him?"
Canada rolled his hands into fists.
"Get. Out."
America looked hurt. Almost nobody could resist America's hurt face, cute and huggable as it was. But Canada didn't see that. All the larger nation could see was his more powerful brother, who always upstaged him, always got all the attention, always caused him trouble, always - !
"Mattie?" America asked in a tiny voice.
And something in Canada snapped.
"GET OUT!" he roared at his twin, shoving him into the door. America looked quite taken aback. "Get the HELL OUT of my HOUSE! I can't stand to look at your face! I HATE you!"
The room was quiet for a second. Just a second.
"Canada!" France chastised, "Your brother came all this way to pay you a visit on your birthday. You can't just turn him away now! Tell him you're sorry!"
"What's gotten into you, Canada?" England joined in, defending the offending brother, "America hasn't done anything to you in years!"
"Mattie?" Ukraine asked in a tiny voice, "America didn't do anything wrong…."
Canada couldn't believe his ears. They – including England of all people – were defending the bastard! Canada gritted his teeth, shoved America away from the door, and yanked it open.
"Fine! FINE! If that's the way it is…!" Canada never finished his sentence. He chose to instead slam the door hard behind him, leaving everyone staring at him, thunderstruck, inside. He whirled around and stomped down his sidewalk.
"I hate him!" Canada yelled, anger and frustration building up in his chest, coming to an irate boil, "I HATE HIM! I WISH…! I WISH HE WAS NEVER BORN!"
"Are you sure?" said a tiny voice to Canada's right. Canada stumbled over his feet, and fear clutched at his chest. For a second, he thought it was Russia, but then the part of his brain that wasn't boiling with anger processed that the voice was female. He turned to look at the speaker.
A tiny girl with glittering gold wings hovered in the air next to Canada. Her skin was green, but her hair was as golden as her wings and it fell past her shoulders down to her ankles. Her eyes were a mesmerizing purple.
A fairy….
Well, he was England's son.
"…Who are you?" Canada asked.
"Hnnn? My name is Star. I am here to grant your wish. Are you sure?"
Canada stared at the fairy named Star. "Sure… about what?"
Star smiled. "You said you wished your brother was never born. Are you sure?"
Canada looked at the fairy. He pictured America's face in his mind, smiling and ungodly annoying. Anger bubbled back up in his chest, and his eyes burned with fury.
"Yes. I wish he was never born!"
The fairy seemed to contemplate this. She floated up to his face, and smiled at him. "Okay." She tapped his nose, and green sparks flew. Canada was mesmerized by the lights.
Like the Fourth of July fireworks Alfred is so fond of… Canada thought. It was his last thought before he lost all consciousness.
(Author Note: Story is not finished! Please wait for the next chapter! I started this chapter on Canada Day, and ironically enough finished it on the eve of the Fourth of July. Please review! I love reviews~!)
*In 2009, Toronto (A city in the Canadian state of Ontario) beat out Stockholm (a city in Sweden) by garnering 78% of the votes at an Inter Pride conference in St. Petersburg Florida (*snort* Um… America? Holding a pride conference in… Florida? Of all the states available… Florida? *giggle*)