Title: Warm Despite The Chill
Rating: M (for possible sex, language, and substance/ alcohol abuse)
Date Started: 11/4/05
Date Finished: 11/7/05
Date Posted: 11/7/05
Summary: Popular, smart, athletic, stubborn, fun, fiercely loyal, and hot tempered- Lily Evans, 6th year Gryffindor, is a force to be reckoned with. But when she unknowingly breaks James Potters heart, a certain Marauder sets out on the path of revenge to break hers. The summer before her 7th year however, her parents divorce and Lily is left slightly hollow and more concerned with hanging onto thinning threads then looking towards the future. Such as the fact that a man called Lord Voldemort is on the uprising and gathering a dangerous group of followers. Murder, betrayal, fear, friendship, love, and hope all prevail throughout her 7th year, showing Lily that everyone must stand together to beat back this evil force. Thus starts her relationship with The Marauders, her new close friendship with someone who caused her so much pain, and ultimately her love for the guy she swore she'd never fall for, James Potter (once he stops drowning in self-pity that is).
Chapter: One
Chapter Title: Of Dreamland & Shallow Love
Quote:
"Men are like high heels; they're easy to walk on once you get the hang of it."
XXX
There he was. Again. He was there every time, standing in his darker than dark black cape, and a sort of funnily stained shirt underneath, stained with something that horribly reminded her of blood.
And then he'd look up from a pool…of something, and his scarlet eyes, widened with innocence, closed to slits, and he spoke. The usual melodious voice grating into something mean and harsh, something unwelcome to her.
And she'd turn and run, run and not look back until she came to a clearing, and there'd be a stag of some sort, a dark, mysterious, majestic stag, who'd reach out and snuffle her fingers just the slightest, until all of a sudden a twig would snap behind them.
She'd silently beg with her eyes, but the stag, the stupid stag always jumped in front of her to absorb the green light that shot out of the abysmal mans wand…
But tonight would be different, she promised herself as she began to run, she ducked underneath his arm, running the opposite way of the clearing. She ran until she hit a lake…a lake frozen solid with ice of centuries gone by and neglect around the edges. She charily stepped onto the ice and slid and skidded her way to the middle. He was still hunting her, smiling callously now. She realized then, looking around, that she had no chance at all of winning this. Glancing quickly at the ice underneath her, knowing it was to thick to break, she spotted something pale, as ghostly white as the snow falling down from the sky. Kicking away some more snow, knowing that she was being utterly ridiculous, her life was in danger and she wanted to see what lay below the ice, she let out a muffled scream. Beneath her, staring up with pale, lifeless eyes, so much like the world she was trapped in, was a human face.
Unexpectedly she was gripped on the shoulder and forcefully spun around so that her attacker had a clear view and shot at her chest. And then he cruelly bit out the words that had cause so many other souls to die. Just before the green beam hit her, she kneed the man in the groin. Nobody took her down without a fight. And then she collapsed as everything went black.
Lily awoke cold, sheets tangled around her ankles, and normally curly hair, flattened with sweat. She gasped for breath as she tried to discern reality from dream land. There were no evil men here, this was the 6ht year Gryffindor Girl's dorm, with pink bras and fuzzy slippers hanging off bedposts. This was the girls dorm where her 3 best friends, Tyra and Trula and Bethan lived almost year-round. This was not a lake covered in ice and fear. This was Hogwarts School of Witchcraft & Wizardry.
Lily quietly climbed out of bed and pulled a pair of sweats on, along with a plain white zippie. She slipped into a pair of her oldest trainers, threw her dark auburn, crimson red hair up into a sloppy ponytail and then inaudibly, crept out the door and down the 6th year girls staircase, then down the girls staircase, and finally down the common room stair case and into the common room, where a once cheery fire had now faded and a few nearly burnt out embers cast the only warmth.
She sighed heavily, then collapsed into one of the plush red couches. It was so frustrating. She knew these dreams meant something but she wasn't quite sure what and she didn't feel comfortable telling anyone like Madam Pomfrey, the young, new nurse or her friends. It'd only worry them, especially with her family problems going on.
Lily's eyelids were getting heavier and heavier, they felt like the weighed a hundred pounds. The emerald eyed girl was just about to succumb to their weight when she heard a muffled noise.
Opening her eyes, she listened for it again…there it was!
"Running will get you nowhere, hiding won't work either," a voice whispered.
Scared now, perhaps it was the man from her dreams, she grabbed for her wand, then realized it wasn't next to her.
'Idiot, you're about to be murdered and can't even stand up for yourself now!' she chided herself mentally.
Frantic thoughts and ideas racing through her mind, the 5'2" prefect silently searched for something, anything she could use as a weapon. Her hand finally settled on a class book that had to belong to an advanced NEWT student as it was so heavy.
Lily took a deep breath, counted backwards from 5, then sprung up and into the path of voices.
"STOP!" she shouted.
"AHHH!" numerous voices shouted, voices that seemingly didn't belong to anyone.
Lily was more than scared at this point and screamed herself when 4 boys appeared out of thin air.
She quickly jumped onto the sofa, hiding.
'A dream, another dream…there's no one there. Just poke your head over again and you'll see,' she convinced herself.
Cautiously, the redhead slowly peeked over the couch's back.
Four heads peeked back at her and she screamed once again, setting another round of shouts off from the boys.
"Whoever the bloody hell keeps bloody screaming down there better shut the fuck up!" a gruff voice, loitered with sleep yelled down from the 7th year boys dorm.
Lily's mouth dropped open. He didn't even realize that 4 boys were trying to creep upstairs, after hours, potentially dangerous.
That was when it hit her…boys. Four boys in fact, sneaking in in the middle of the night, appearing out of thin air.
"JAMES POTTER! YOU ASS! WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING SNEAKING IN AT THIS TIME? YOU BLOODY WELL SCARED ME OUT OF MY MIND!" she began to cuss.
The 16 year old Gryffindor being yelled at, sheepishly got up from his crouching position behind the other couch.
"Hey luv, I'm…uhhh…sorry?" he shrugged.
Muffled chuckles could be heard behind his couch.
"YOU THIK THIS IS FUNNY BLACK, LUPIN, PETTIGREW? I"LL GIVE YOU FUNNY! FUNNY IS DETENTION FOR THE NEXT WEEK, INCLUDING SATURDAY!"
The 3 other boys got up and stood behind the first.
"But Lily, it's quidditch this weekend- and you can't score the goals all on your own- you need me and Jamsie's help!" Sirius pointed out.
"Yeah- and I'm commenting that match!" Remus added.
"Erg…fine! Just…get out of my fucking sight," she pouted.
Three of the 4 boys raced each other upstairs, smiling triumphantly. One however stayed behind. James.
"What do you want Potter?" Lily asked, lowering herself into an overstuffed red armchair.
The messy black haired walked over to her chair, and proceeded to stand in front of her.
"Sorry?" he quipped.
"For what Potter? For being a prick? Being a big-headed prat? For asking me out all the time?" she snapped, looking up only to find herself staring into his dizzying hazel eyes- a swirling brown and green mixture, hidden behind gold rimmed glasses that helped make them stand out so much more clearly.
"I really am sorry- I didn't mean to uhhh…scare you like that," he clarified.
Still entranced by his eyes, Lily stood up and found herself a bit closer to him than her comfort allowed.
"It's ummm…okay Potter. Sorry I yelled so much back there. It's just that I haven't been sleeping so well. I've been getting these horrific dreams with-" she stopped and looked away.
Why had she just told him that? It's not like she liked him or anything…she could just barely stand him- but even that was forced for they had classes and quidditch together everyday.
James frowned. Dreams? He softly grabbed her chin and turned her head up, so that he could see her face.
She reluctantly dragged her eyes back towards him and looked up, up, up.
It slipped out before she could stop it.
"How tall are you James?"
He stared at her in shock before replying, "you called me James."
'Shit, he caught my slip-up. What do I do? Maybe if I play it cool, try and act like I didn't, he might think he imagined it,' she thought frantically.
"Potter, how tall are you?"
"Not so fast luv, you just called me James. Admit it."
She shook her head forcefully.
"Yes you did!"
"No!"
"Yes!"
"No!"
"If you admit to it I'll tell you how tall I am and anything else you wanna know," he offered, stepping a bit closer to the girl he'd loved since first year.
"Erg…fine! Yes I did call you James, but it'll never happen again," she relented finally.
"Ah-hah! I'm 6'4". Anything else you feel like knowing?" he smirked.
Lily racked her brains, but it was hard to think when he smelt so damn good. Kind of an outdoorsy smell, with a musky scent, that would've been sex and lust if the two had ever had a scent captured, smoldering in the background and imprinting itself into her mind.
Finally another question popped into her mind.
"Potter, why do you always ask me out?"
She felt, rather than saw, as the fire had now been completely extinguished, him take a deep breath, and upon realizing she could feel him breathing, took a step backwards.
"I ask you out because I think you're beautiful and stunning, and I like your personality a lot. And I like how you look when you're completely infuriated. Which is one of the reasons why I like to get you mad all the time," he replied truthfully, a bit of a smirk flittering across his face again.
Lily, however, was not as amused.
"That's why you insist on making my life hell most of the time? Because you like how I look when I'm hacked off?"
"Err… yes? Look Lily, I love you," he blurted out.
"You do, do you? For how long?" she asked, slowly growing madder.
How dare he just tell her that he wanted to torture her because he loved her! He was still a prick…and she still hated him. Lily took a couple deep breaths to try and curb her temper that was about ready to lash out.
"Since the first day of first year. I loved you at first sight Lily!" he confessed, expecting to be met with at least a little bit of acceptance.
James got something else entirely.
"Yeah well you know what?"
"What?" he asked curiously.
"Love at first sight is shallow James, just like you."
And with that she turned on her heel and stormed back upstairs, unknowingly leaving the boy with his broken heart strewn among the common room floor, and his friends to pick up the pieces.
XXX
Well, what did you all think? Please leave me a review! Anyways, if there are errors anywhere, I apologize because I was just so excited to finish this first chapter, I posted it without having my beta check it over. As soon as I get the edited copy back, I'll post that one up instead.
REVIEW! REVIEW! REVIEW!
Lyl,
BB
xoxo