I give total and complete credit to CarmillaD. She translated ALL the story by herself. She's amazing. AMAZING. Love you girl! This is totally EPIC! THANKS!
Fanarts:
guitarnrd362(dot)deviantart(dot)com/art/RQ-Car-Trouble-Heart-Trouble-196850677
marilynndxc(dot)deviantart(dot)com/#/d38e9qg
I don't know how to thank you girls, you're the bests! :D
Everything can change
I could see the cold, moist and lonely road at the sides of my car during the night. I wasn't going too fast, I was trying to clear my head. In every tree I was leaving behind, I could see his face lying in wait for me, trying to never be forgotten.
I noticed a faint light at the distance, growing stronger as I was getting closer. While I was listening to my own sighs, something suddenly failed, the motor stopped working and the car halted. Unbelievable… At mere steps there was the previous gleam, coming from a melancholic bar. I was a decent woman; I would've never gone inside a place like that. However, it had its own special charm: It was very antique, with dim lights and hidden in the mist. I let my head fall in the steering wheel. What else could I lose? I was the biggest loser of the day. Having a drink in that dump wouldn't kill me… or at least I hoped so.
I got out of the car, the only thing someone could hear were my footsteps on the asphalt and low, pathetic music coming from the bar. I entered with a slight trembling and my teeth chattering because of the cold weather, giving a better look to every detail inside. Everybody fixed their gaze on me since I was the new one. There was just a few customers, seemed to be only five at first sight: Two old patrons drinking whisky while playing cards and three middle-aged women sitting together and sharing the same ruined appearance, maybe battered by their hard life, but even so they were the only ones giving an occasional laugh.
Soon I found out they weren't five, but six instead: the most mysterious one was a man sitting alone in the darkest corner. I couldn't see his face, but I could tell by his physical build that he was young. I didn't want to be there standing still for more than three seconds or they would start to give me funny looks… even funnier than the ones they were giving me already.
I chose the second closest table to the door for no special reason. Since it was for two persons, there was an empty chair in front of me. That suddenly reminded me why I was there, and immediately a silent tear ran down my cheek. I dried it at once so no one could notice it. Some minutes later a waitress stood in front of me, asking me rudely what I was going to order. I doubted for a moment: I didn't drink frequently. Then again, this wasn't a good day or at least a normal one.
I ordered a Gin Tonic. If I was lucky, that would help me to forget for a while. Just before drinking it, almost accidently, I looked at a gaze interested in my actions out of the corner of my eye: The enigmatic guy from the dark corner fixed his eyes on me with notorious attention. However, I couldn't define his face, hidden in the shadows of the bar and the darkness of the night. It should've mattered to me, even scared me, but it had the opposite effect: I shrugged it off and finished my Gin Tonic. I started with just one order and took me a while to drink all of it. But then I asked for one more, and another one… And just like I got faster in hitting bottom with every passing glass, every time I picked up my drink the strange man stared at me and I returned the gesture. Now I was more intrigued. What was he up to? I should've thought about that before.
I had started to feel the alcohol's effects and wanted more. When I was about to raise my hand to call the waitress, somebody stood up in front of me. It was him. He looked better up close: sculptural body, jet black hair and gorgeous blue eyes looking at me intently. I stared at him speechless from my seat at the rectangular table.
-May I? -He asked, pointing at the empty chair in front of me.
I would've never driven alone in that part of the city, at least not at night, even less gone inside a crappy bar to have a drink. But the last thing I would've done in the same circumstances was talking with a complete stranger when I'd been drinking alcohol and having my car totally broken. Nevertheless, this day was the exception: I was doing every crazy thing I had never done in my life. On the other side, I didn't enter to that place to socialize. That was the last thing I wanted. Besides, knowing me, if I had gotten drunk I would start telling my whole life soon after the conversation had started. Even considering all these reasons, I couldn't say no to him: His eyes had something that forced to accept. I only nodded in approval. Without beating about the bush, he took the chair with his right hand and seated in front of me, tipping it back.
-Is something wrong? -I had to ask because he remained quiet. He answered denying with his head.
-No…
-Then?
-I only wanted to talk
-I noticed you were looking at me
-Mmm… Could be
-Could be? Come on, I'm not dumb. You've been watching me since I arrived. -Yes, my suspicions were more than correct: He wasn't only mysterious, but strange too.
-You caught my attention.
-A girl coming inside a bar? I don't think it's too weird.
-I didn't say it was weird.
He was starting to annoy me with his short sentences going nowhere.
-Then what is it?
-I've never seen a girl like you in a place like this.
That surprised me: He knew what kind of person I was… I mean, he was right. I'd never been in a bar like that one before.
-So there was something more, then… -I said.
He didn't say anything, but gave me a little smile instead. A sweet and friendly one. That was the first sign of cheerfulness I'd seen in miles.
-What's your name?
-Courtney… Courtney Gallagher.
He extended his hand over the table, waiting for me to take it.
-Duncan Pierce.
Immediately after brushing it for the first time the contact surprised me: It was strong but soft at the same time, like taking the hand of a gentle giant. When we separated I remembered what I was about to do before he was there: I wanted another drink, even if hundred strangers came to talk to me I still felt miserable.
-Wai… -I was raising my hand when another one stopped me. Incredulous I looked at my companion. -…tress…
-You shouldn't keep drinking…
-No, I shouldn't. But I want to do it anyway.
-Why?
-That's none of your business.
-Fine. -He replied with a serious but not harsh tone, letting go of my hand and putting it away from me. -Do whatever you want.
I swear I was going to do it… But I couldn't. In the moment he took my hand my mind went back to the past. However, in my memory I wasn't in a bar, but in my favorite restaurant instead, beautifully enlightened in a summer night. The person in front of me was another one, completely different, and held my left hand with another purpose. I even remembered the way he took the little velvet box out of his pocket to put it in front of me, and how the glittering of a small circular object would marvel me forever once he opened it to put the delicate jewel in my ring finger and asked: "Would you marry me?"
I froze in my place, without words. In the bottom of my eyes I could feel the warmth of tears starting to appear one after another. I didn't stop them: I was tired of pretending. Soft and silent strokes traced my cheeks, giving me up.
-Hey… What's the matter? -My companion asked. He seemed… worried? I don't think so. I was just a stranger for him.
-It's… it's nothing.
-If you wanted your drink so badly, I just…
-It's not that. S-sorry, I have to go. -I stuttered, making it more obvious.
I left the money for my bill on the table and quickly got out of there. I was such a masochist: There wasn't any reason to go inside a bar like that to make me feel worse. My own self was looking for it, I needed his memory…
The moment I closed the local's door I ran to my car. I put the key in the contact… and nothing happened. I had forgotten like an imbecile that I was stuck there because my car died. Everything was going so wrong for me. I couldn't even drink at peace. I let the sobs let out by their own, resounding in the night. With my hands on the steering wheel, I rested my head on it, without any more strength. If only I could wake up from that nightmare…
Suddenly, my melodramatic moment was interrupted by some tapping. I turned to the right and found a silhouette on the window. It was him again. At first I'd thought he was quiet and enigmatic, but now turned out he was persistent too. Or maybe he just thought it was his fault that I had run away like that.
I pulled down the window to ask him once for all what the hell did he wanted since he never gave a satisfying answer: "wanting to talk" wasn't enough of a reason. He didn't give me time to speak, though: Once the glass was completely down, he talked first.
-I'm sorry if I offended you…
I cleaned up the tears off my face the best I could to speak better.
-You didn't. It's me. See you later… I guess…
-Wait. Your car isn't working, right?
-Yeah…
-I can help you with it… if you want.
Probably there wasn't any mechanic who would go at 2:00 a.m to that part of the city to fix my problem, I didn't have a choice. Sure, the guy didn't talk a lot, but he wasn't a bad person. To be honest, there was something about him that I liked, but I couldn't put my finger on what it was.
-Ok. -I said drying the last tear.
I got out of the car and explained how it stopped; then, he asked my permission to see the motor. He rolled up the long sleeves of his shirt and started checking cable after cable. Since I had no idea of what was he doing I remained silent, although he didn't do the same.
-Can I ask what happened? -He said while he was working.
-I don't want to talk about that… I will just say that it has something to do with the reason why I'm here right now.
-Well, I don't know if it's useful or not, but… I won't tell anything to anybody.
I didn't say a word for several minutes; I think almost five, just analyzing his last comment. I knew that I would end up doing this sooner or later.
-I haven't talked about it with anyone… Not even my best friend.
He raised his eyes and smiled calmly, encouraging me
-I'm listening.
-I… I don't know where to start…
-It's always nice to go from the beginning.
-Is just that… I'm not sure when it began. First it was a dream… and now… everything crashed down.
-Which means… there was a drastic change.
-Yes… It was… m-my boyfriend.
-Did he…?
-…Pass away? No, even worse… He dumped me.
There was a long silence between both of us, probably because he didn't understand it.
-Excuse me for asking this… But how can it be worse?
-I he had died, at least I would've known that he passed away loving me; but he was the one who left me, and now I've discovered that he… practically hated me…
Finding out about that didn't make me feel sad, but I did felt fooled and abused.
-I don't know what happened… What did I do wrong… -He looked at me curious, asking me to go on. -I came from work and… -I stopped, remembering every detail. -…and there was a note on the table with just a few words.
-What did it say?
-It said: 'I'm sorry, but I can't keep doing this. Don't try to find me, because you won't. Goodbye…' And that was all. -I sighed, close to giving up to my pent up wrath. -I really thought that what we had was going somewhere… That he was the right one… But I was so wrong… We were engaged…
-Sorry if it offends you… But the guy is an idiot.
My blood boiled when I heard that insult towards him.
-Don't you dare to talk about him like that. I'm sure…
-I wouldn't have left you.
Time simply froze, with us staring at each other in the middle of the sad road. Nobody said anything and all was still. He smiled at me in a cute lopsided way. It didn't irritate me; on the contrary: I returned it. I had no idea what was he up to, nevertheless he made me feel trust and he was giving me a shoulder where I could have support.
-You shouldn't say that to people you've only known for 30 minutes -I replied embarrassed.
-I'll keep it in mind. -He said smiling, almost with humor. -Ok… -He went on, closing the hood. -That's all. I couldn't go further without tools; you'll have to take it to the workshop tomorrow.
-Here. -I extended my hand to give him money. He looked at me like I was crazy. -Come on, take it.
-You don't need to pay me.
-I insist.
-Definitely no. Let's keep it in 'See you later… I guess…' -He answered quoting my previous words. I had to give up.
-See you… And thank you… for everything.
-You're welcome. -Giving me a last smile, he turned and started walking.
The cold was so strong that it froze to the bones, but surprisingly he didn't get there in a car. He dodged the few ones passing by and walked at the side of the road. Seemed like he was going home by foot.
-Wait! -I yelled, running to catch up with him. -Do you live near here?
-No… no. In fact, I live in the other side of the city.
-I can give you a lift if you want, it's too cold. Besides, I need to pay you back somehow. Is the least I can do.
He thought about his choices for some seconds before answering.
-Alright. I guess I can let you do that. You should be a lawyer: With your insistence you'd never lose a case.
We started walking together to my car. I let out a light laugh.
-As a matter of fact, I am one.
-Really? Wow, awesome.
-And you? What's your job? -I asked while we got in the car.
Once we were inside, he replied:
-I went to college for two years until I realized it wasn't for me. Then I continued the familiar tradition… and became a cop.
He was the weirdest police officer I'd ever seen, and I had met a lot as a lawyer. He didn't look or acted like any of them. Anyhow, our conversations kept changing. We were trying to know each other better and we were achieving it, our mutual trust growing with each word. For a moment I could even forget why I ended up there that night. I don't know how I'd managed to pull out the depression and loneliness during the entire ride, but I did it and that was what mattered. I even laughed a couple of times.
He was funny and told me anecdotes and situations he had been through, getting more confident and chattier over time. Turned out he was my complete opposite: He liked to go out, the bachelorhood, music that even now I find nonsensical and he was different to me in many other aspects that I would've found dislikeable in other people. However, all of it put together in just one guy with such eyes… attracted me.
His glances weren't indifferent to me. I was pretty sure I wasn't the kind of girl he would like, but he looked at me like he did. What was I doing? Had I already forgotten… the other one? It was too soon, and it'd been just one hour and a half since my present companion spoke to me for the first time. I had to consider that the next time I would see him it would probably be just by chance… I would never know too much about him.
-Ok, now turn right -He told me, giving me instructions to get to his place. -There, the one with the black door.
I parked and put my hands off the steering wheel so I could say him goodbye. When I turned I saw that, as he did most the time, he had gone a step forward and was looking at me already. Under his calmed gaze appeared a smile. Why did he constantly show me one?
-What? -I had to ask. I still suspected him.
-You know that… I didn't sit in your table just to talk, right?
Finally it was time for the truth.
-I have to admit that… I saw that coming. I still don't know why, though. -I was excited by the idea of him feeling attraction towards me, but at the same time I was afraid to confirm that he had being so nice to me just expecting some kind of reward.
-Because from the moment you went through the door I knew that, if I didn't got closer and talked to you, I wouldn't forgive myself for a long time.
My own silence, sharp as crystal but pacific as breeze, caused me goosebumps. I didn't know what to say, I was trapped and improvising wasn't my thing: I always acted according to a plan. He put his hand in the door handle and the classic sound of the lock opening up was heard. He turned to me, maybe decided to say goodbye.
-Well… If there isn't anything else to say… -He started to open the door.
His disappointment was undeniable: I hadn't given him the answer he was expecting…
But I would.
-Wait… -He stopped on his tracks at once, and with almost pleading eyes he waited indeed.
-I thought this was going to be one of the worst nights of my life… Is the first one I spent without him in a long time. I went out completely alone in a dangerous zone in the middle of the night; I drank and did more than just talking with a total stranger. I'm not like that. I can't explain why I did it…
He turned his face to the side. I knew what he was thinking: He assumed I was trying to excuse my rejection towards him.
-Although I can assure you this… -He looked at me again, with hope hidden in his innocent smile. -I won't forgive myself either if I don't kiss you before you go…
It wasn't necessary to add something more, because there was nothing left to say.
His fingers took the sides of my face delicately and I got lost in his powerful gaze once more before getting carried away by what the rest of the night offered me.
I'm not sure why I practically give myself to a man I had just met. Maybe it was out of spite, the effects of the melancholy or the alcohol, or his hypnotic eyes. I'm not trying to find an explanation, anyway, and to be honest I don't regret the decision I made.
We spent the night there, drawing the eternity body to body in his humble home… The one with the black door.
OoOoOoO
Thin rays of daylight flicker through the window, inviting me to follow them. I'll join them soon, but first I need to do one last thing. Quietly, I look for paper and a pencil in my purse, and once I find them I write my phone number on it. With just a few steps I get to the bed, where he's still sleeping, caressed by the white sheets. I give him a goodbye kiss in the forehead and put the paper on his pillow, hoping it will be the first thing he'll see when he wakes up.
Last night I felt like I wouldn't survive, like my future went from being written in stone to be a dark void with nothing around it. But now that I'm learning to risk for what I feel and want, knowing that everything can change, I can declare that last night was far away from being the worst and became an unforgettable one.
THE END
