Vegas Baby

AN: I decided to do this story after I watched The Hangover Part II. If this story turns out really good then maybe I'll continue it to a next story (figures crosses) Anyways, shit aside this story is rated M for a reason beacuase of my potty mouth and future Lemonades (lol) ENJOY! REVIEWS ARE LOVELY:]

'You've reached Doug. Sorry I missed your call. Please leave a name and number and I'll get back to you.'

'Hi, you've reached Dr. Stuart Price with Divine Dentistry. Please leave a message after…'

'Hey, this is Phil. Leave me a message or don 't. Do me a favor, don 't text me. It's gay.'

'Hey, this is Evelyn. You know the drill! You leave a message...and I ignore it!'

We where in the Mojave Dessert it was morning and the heat-waves rise off the Mojave. We were all in our early 20's (I'm 22 the youngest). My dirty blond hair was tied in a messy bun, my cowboy boots where hurting my foot, my once pale skin was now in a nice tan, the heat was uncontrollable the only thing keeping me alive was my ski blue jean shorts and my short tan shirt that showed off my abs and my belly button and my new tramp stamp tattoo of a colors full butterfly that I have no idea how it got there. I stared at Phil who was standing a lone talking in his cellphone in the middle of the desert. He was tall, rugged, and currently a mess. His shirt was ripped open, his aviator sunglasses where bent, his lip was all bloodied, and he clearly hasn't slept in days. Well, none of us has. I squinted my eyes from the rising heat and turned to look behind me to see Alan and Stu slouched inside the backseat, also looking like hell.

"Tracy, it's Phil." Phil said as he turned around to look at us. He ran his eyes thew the parked car on the dirt road the 1969 Mercedes-benz Cabriolet convertible near totaled; it was scratched, dented, and filthy.

"Phil, where the hell are you guys?" Tracy asked panicking "I'm freaking out."

"Yeah, listen. Uh-we fucked up." Phil said as he stared at me sight.

"What are you talking about?" Tracy asked getting more worried.

"The bachelor party, the whole night. It...things got out of control, uh-and we lost Doug." Phil said squinted from the rising heat.

"What?" Tracy said her yaw dropping.

"We can't find Doug." Phil said being a little more clear.

"What are you saying, Phil? We're getting married in five hours." Tracy said running a hand threw her hair.

"Yeah. That's not gonna happen." Phil said. Your probably wondering how all of this happen i'll tell you let's go back to two days earlier.

TWO DAYS EARLIER;

I took one last glance at myself from the oval shaped full length mirror. I was being a bridesmaid (of honor) for Tracy's and Doug's wedding. Not that I volunteered I got blackmailed to do so. You see me, Evelyn Somers (currently 21 turning 22 next month), Phil Wenneck, Stewart Price or as we like to call him 'Stu', and Doug Billings have been best of friends since the sandlot. I was much of a tomboy thanks to them but I still like girly thugs like my favorite colors are pink and green I just think they perfect with each other. Anyways, the three of us where the most fierce in high school; ahh, good times. We also went to the same collage and stuff like that. I was the youngest from all of them so they protected me like a little sister, but ever since I turned 19 Phil turned to a fruit fruit dog that keeps on humping your leg. He hasn't left me alone ever since he got divorce from his gold-digger of an ex-wife he hasn't stop from getting in my pants. He did get in pants one time in collage in his dorm and what was funny was that Doug was on the top part of the bunk bed. Yeah, my first time wasn't that romantic but hell at least I got to the with the hottest guy in collage and my long time crush. I'm much of dirty mouth hillbilly always coursing and stuff. My parents where high class and my mom didn't much appreciate my dirty mouth, my arrogant way, and the way I dress she says I look like a street prostitute, but hell I don't care my daddy supports me i'm more of a daddy's little girl, and my little sister is my mom favorite and became little miss drama queen.

Anyways back to the story so the reason I was blackmailed to the bridesmaid thing was because they gave me two options if I said 'yes' to being a bridesmaid (of honor) I get to go with the boys the Las Vegas for the bachelors party, but if I said 'no' then I don't get to go. So I decided 'yes' to becoming a bridesmaid (of honor) so now I get to Vegas and sleep with two complete unknown man and have no clue what happen. I stared at my refection of myself the dress was black and white, floor length, and it was strapless. I actually looked pretty in and I kinda didn't want to take it off.

"Ah, you look gorgeous!" Tracy shrieked putting her chin on my shoulder and staring at my reflection.

"Yeah, but don't you think it should be a bit shorter." I said pulling the dress up since I couldn't walk in it.

"Naw, it's perfect. No go take it off." Tracy said shooing me to the dressing room. I took of the dress and slipped back into my faded out skinny jeans, my green Bob Marly shirt that was loose and cut to show my belly button, and my green pumps. I came back out and two of the bridesmaid that I did not know for all I knew they where Tracy's friends snickered at each other and walked over to me.

"Hey, Evelyn I love your shirt where you get it, slut dot com?" the blond said high-fiving the other blond and laughing.

"Oh, I'm so sorry what's your name?" the blond opened her mouth to respond but I shushed her up by holding out my hand in front of her "Why don't you go outside any play, hide and go fuck yourself?" I said with a fake smile then pushed past them Tracy smiled and fallowed me.

"Nice one, trust me their not my friends. My mom forced me to make them my bridesmaid." Tracy said laughing.

"Yeah. I'll see you on sunday." I said kissing her on the cheek and hugging her.

"Wait, Ev." Tracy called out to me.

"Yes?" I said turning around.

"Why don't you give Phil a chance?" Tracy said covering the sun with her hand.

"I don't know. I just don't think he deserves it." I said staring at the ground I could see Tracy sad face.

"I got to go, cheer up." I said getting inside the car with Doug. Tracy smiled and nodded her head. A few minutes later we where at the Garner's mansion. I sat impatiently as I watched Floyd get some measurements from Alan Tracy's brother.

"To my left a little. Thank you. Okey-dokey." said Floyd as he moved his hand up Alan's leg to get his inseam.

"Whoa, watch it, pervert!" Alan yelled making me jump a little.

"What the hell, Alan, he's just doing your inseam." I said getting annoyed. Alan always found I way to get under my skin. He was very annoying and the little things he did threw me of the edge.

"He's getting very close to my shaft." Alan kept yelling me and Doug shared a look and rolled our eyes.

"All done. You can change now." Floyd said walking out of the room disturbed I wouldn't blame him.

"Right. Thanks, Floyd. Thank you very much." Doug said sighting from Alan's behavior.

"All right, buddy, we should get a move on." Doug said starting to change into his clothes. I didn't mind Doug undressing in front of me we did it all the time when we were kids.

"You know, guys, I was thinking...If you wanna go to Vegas without me, that is totally cool, you know?" Alan said untucking his white button down shirt out of his pants.

"Great, let's go Doug-"

"Shut up Eve. What are you talking about?" Doug said cutting me of I was about to snap back but I calmed down.

"You know, Phil and Stu, they're your buddies, and it's your bachelor party." Alan said removing his shirt I rolled my eyes and removed my eyes from Alan and focused more on Doug.

"Come on, Alan. Those two love you." Doug said putting on his purple button down shirt.

"And also, I don't want you to feel like you have to hold back-" Alan dropped his pants "because your wife's brother's there-I just…"

"It's not like that…" I looked at Doug who was disturbed by something I fallowed his gaze and founding something very disturbing I gaged and got out of the room and waited outside instead. My eyes got wide when Sid opened the garage door reveling his gray 1969 Mercedes-benz Cabriolet. My jaw dropped and I quickly went int the garage to check the car out.

"No. Sid."

"Really?" I said running my hand threw the leather of the car.

"Come on, we're family now, Doug!" Sid said.

"You sure? I mean, you love this car." Doug said making sure.

"Doug, it's just a car. Just make sure to put some armor all on the tires so the sand doesn't seep in." Sid said touching the hood of the car with the tip of his fingers.

"Absolutely. That's easy. I'll make sure we do." I said not wanting to Sid change his mind.

"Great, I knew I can count on you Ev. Oh, and, uh, don't let Alan drive because there's something wrong with him." Sid said whispering the last part.

"Understood." I said. I took a look at Alan an made a disgusted face when I saw him crouched down making out with the dog. I shook my head and focused again on the car.

"There really is something wrong with him." I said leaning over to Doug.

"Oh, and Phil either. I don't like him." Said whispering the last part again I started laughing.

"I will be the only one driving this car. I promise." Doug said reassuring Sid.

"Hey, what about me?" I whined.

"No, your cars never make it to the next day and your on probation." Sid said frowning. Of course how could they not make it threw the night overtime I got a new car Phil would insist we take it on a spin and the three would make sure I get enough wasted to actually decided to drive a car and end up racing some local junkie and end up crashing my car.

"Like I said nobody is going to drive this car." Doug said repeating himself.

"Good-" Sid tossed Doug the car keys "Remember, what happens in Vegas stays in Vegas." Sid said with a grin. Doug and I laughed but then I stopped.

"Except for herpes. That shit'll come back with you." I said serious.

As we waited for Phil to come out of the school sat in the back seat changing into one of my faded out jean shorts and took off my Bob Marley shirt I could see some of the kids jaw dropping when they saw me in my bra.

"God, Ev, why didn't you do that when we where at the house?" Doug complained. I notice Alan staring at me over the front top mirror so I blew him a kiss and a winking as I slipped over my head my light pink shirt that showed of my abs and bellybutton.

"Chill out, Dougie!" I said putting my Versace sunglasses on the top of my head and pushed my clothes into my bag. I got a few whistles from some kids when I stood up and sat on the top part of the car putting my boots on the leather.

"Down boys." I purred at them.

"God damnit, Ev, don't put you feet on the leather." Doug yelled at me. I rolled my eyes and ignored him.

"Do you have to park so close?" Alan said from the passengers seat covering the side of his face.

"Yeah. What's wrong?" Doug asked him.

"I shouldn't be here." Alan said.

"Why is that, Alan?" I asked pulling down my Versace sunglasses from the top of my head.

"I'm not supposed to be within 200 feet of a school." Alan said still covering his face like if it was helping.

"What?" me and Doug said stimulatingly

"Or a Chuck E. Cheese." Alan said just as Phil walked over to us I rolled my eyes as annoyance came over me.

"Mr. Wenneck, I was…"

"It's the weekend. I don't know you. You do not exist." Phil said cutting of the kid.

"Shit." Phil said examining the car "Nice car."

"Yeah." Doug said looking at Phil.

"I'm driving." Phil said stepping over the door and throwing his bag on the seat.

"Whoa, no chance, buddy... Don't step...God. Watch the leath…" Doug yelled at Phil. I slipped back into my seat and Phil slipped his arm around me.

"Shut up and drive before these nerds ask me another question." Phil said.

"Animal." I said removing his arm around my shoulder.

"Who's this?" Phil asked.

"It's Alan. Tracy's brother." Doug said as he started the car.

"I met you, like, four times." Alan said in a high pitched tone.

"Oh, yeah. How you doing, man?"

We reached Stu's house I wrinkled my nose as if I had smell something nasty.

"You smell that?" I asked Phil.

"Yeah it smells like a bitch that fucked a sailor." Phil said I nodded my head. I had caught Melissa fucking some bartender behind the bar and I had grabbed her by the hair and beat the crap out of her. She hated me ever since.

"PAGING DR. FAGGOT!" Phil yelled I laughed and decided to join in the fun.

"DR. FAGGOT!" I yelled Phil turned to me and smiled. Melissa opened the door and Stu stood behind her like a lost puppy.

"AHOY. THERE SLUT! WHILE STU'S GONE WHO THE HELL ARE YOU GOING TO FUCK? THE FEDEX GUY?" I yelled as I stood up.

"FUCK YOU BITCH. WHY DONT YOU BE A GOOD LITTLE GIRL AND GO FUCK PHIL!" she yelled back. Phil looked up at me and wagged his eyebrow at me. Stu hurried over to the car before I could say anything. I went into my bag and took out and egg that said slut in a black sharpie. I wagged my eyebrow at the guys and Phil started cheering me on.

"FIRE IN THE HOE!" Phil yelled.

"MERRY CHRISTMAS BITCH!" I yelled as I threw the egg at Melissa hitting her in the head.

"Go, go, go, go!" Stu yelled at Doug.

"YOUR GOING TO PAY FOR THIS BI…" Melissa yelled angrily but we left before she could finished her sentence.

"I cant believe you did that?" Stu yelled at me but me, Phil, Doug, and Alan just kept laughing "Melissa is going to fucking kill me when I get home." Stu panicked.

"Shut the fuck up, wuss!" Phil said said at Stu grinning. Alan stood up from the car and started yelling at a little girl in a different car.

"Whoo! Road trip! Vegas! Vegas, baby! Vegas!" Alan yelled at her the girl frown and flicked Alan off. We all started cracking up again.

"You're nuts!" I said between laughs.

"Come on, just till Barstow. Everybody's passing us." Phil begged at Doug.

"Absolutely not. I promised Sid. I will be the only one driving this car. Besides, you're drinking" Doug said focusing on the road.

"Oh, what are you, a cop now?" I asked him taking a swift of my beer.

"You know I drive great when I'm drunk." Phil said defensively.

"True. Don't forget, Phil was always our designated drunk driver." Stu said taking Phil's side.

"Yeah. You wanna explain it to them, Alan?" Doug asked Alan. Alan turned around and looked at us.

"Guys, my dad loves this car more than he loves me, so, yeah." Alan said turning back in his seat.

"Aw, whatever. I left my wife and kid at home so I could go with you guys. You know how difficult that was?" Phil said sarcastically.

"That's really sweet." Alan said completely not getting it.

"Dude, I was being sarcastic. I fucking hate my life. I may never go back. I might stay in Vegas." Phil said frowning.

"Here we go." Doug said rolling his eyes.

"Doug, enjoy yourself, because come Sunday...you're gonna start dying just a little bit every day." Phil said waning him.

"Speak for your self, Phil." I said rolling my eyes.

"Yeah. That's why I've managed to stay single this whole time, you know?" Alan said cutting in.

"Oh, really? That's why you're single?" I asked him rolling my eyes.

"Yeah." Alan said smiling.

"Cool. Good to know." I said sighting.

"Am I all right over there, Alan?" Doug asked Alan.

"Yeah, you're good." Alan responded. But it was a lie because we almost got hit by a fucking truck. I slammed into Phil because of the unexpected move.

"Aw, Jesus Christ!" Stu yelled.

"Oh, my God!" I yelled gripping Phil's leg.

"That was awesome!" Alan yelled laughing.

"That was not awesome. What's wrong with you?" Doug yelled. I started laughing a little.

"That was insane. We almost just died." Stu yelled.

"You should have seen your face. Classic." Alan said still laughing.

"That's funny." I said chuckling.

"It's not funny." Doug shot back at me.

We stood behind a lady who was paying for her things in a gas station. Phil was eating his unpaid bag of potatoes chips, and I stood with them holding a bag of Lifesavers and a Red Bull we watched Alan lean against the car reading a book pumping gas into the car. A old man walked up to him and admired the car.

"Boy, you've got a sweet ride there." the old man told Alan.

"Don't touch it. Don't even look at it. Go on, get out…" Alan said the old man started walking away "You heard me. Don't look at me, either. Yeah, you better walk on." Alan threatened.

"He's actually kind of funny." I said tilting my head to the side.

"Yeah, he means well." Doug agreed.

"I'll hit an old man in public." Alan kept yelling at the old man.

"Is he all there? Like, mentally?" Phil asked staring at Alan. I took the chance and put my hand in his chips and grabbed a hand full.

"I think so. He's just an odd guy." Doug said staring at Alan also.

"You know, he's kind of weird." I said munching on the chip I just plopped into my mouth.

"I mean, should we be worried?" Phil asked.

"No." Doug said shaking his head.

"All right." I said putting my things on the counter.

"No. Tracy did mention that we shouldn't let him gamble. Or drink too much.." Doug said chewing on his gum.

"Jesus, he's like a gremlin. Comes with instructions and shit." I said wrinkling nose.

"And one water." Stu said putting a water bottle on the counter.

"All good with Melissa?" Doug asked him.

"Oh, yeah. Told her we're two hours outside of wine country, and she bought it." Stu said nodding his head.

"You think it's strange you've been in a relationship for years, and you have to lie about Vegas?" Phil asked him.

"Yeah, I do. But trust me, it's not worth the fight." Stu said laughing.

"Oh, so you can't go to Vegas, but she can fuck a bellhop on a Carnival Cruise Line?" I asked him by his lame answer. The cashier looked up at us getting disturbed by the conversation.

"Hey. Okay, first of all, he was a bartender, and she was wasted. And, if you must know he didn't even come inside her."

"And you believe that?" Phil asked as we all turned to face the cashier.

"Uh, yeah, I do believe that, because she's grossed out by semen." Stu said defensively.

"You know it's a shame you all said if a guy even cheat on me to kick his ass. Yet this bitch cheats on you and all of a sudden you cant fucking walk away?" I asked Stu. He opened his mouth to say something but closed it. Phil and Doug chuckled knowing I won this round.

"That's a fucking shame." I repeated grabbing my stuff off the counter and walking out.

"That'll be 32.50." the cashier said. Phil turned to Stu.

"It's 32.50, you gonna pay for it?" Phil said. I sat in the back quietly I was annoyed at Stu and he knew that because he kept taking a few sad glances at me. I stared at Alan who had his nose in a Blackjack tip book.

"It says here we should work in teams. Who wants to be my spotter?" Alan asked us.

"I don't think you should be doing too much gambling tonight, Alan." Doug said keeping his eyes on the road.

"Gambling? Who said anything about gambling? It's not gambling when you know you're gonna win. Counting cards is a foolproof system."Alan said. God, he was so stubborn.

"It's also illegal." I said rolling my eyes.

"It's not illegal, it's frowned upon, like masturbating on an airplane." Alan said closing the book.

"I'm pretty sure that's illegal too." Stu said pursing his lips.

"Yeah, maybe after 9/11, where everybody got so sensitive-" we all exchanged glances.

"Thanks a lot, Bin Laden." Alan finished.

"Either way, you gotta be super smart to count cards, buddy, okay?" Doug said turning to look at him for a brief second then turning back to the road.

"Oh, really?" Alan asked hurt.

"It's not easy." Doug continued.

"Well maybe we should tell that to Rain Man-because he practically bankrupted a casino, and he was a ruh-tard." Alan said. I knew what retard was but defiantly not a ruh-tard.

"What?" Stu asked with a face of 'you got to be kidding me'.

"He was a ruh-tard." Alan said again.

"Retard." I said rolling my eyes correcting him.

"Here we go." Doug said I leaned over and turned the radio on not wanting to hear anymore of Alan's jabbering Kanye West song Cant Tell Me Nothing came on so I turned it all the way up.

AN: Check out my profile to see how Evelyn looks like and future things that I will put links up. Okay how is this as a new chapter. I'll love to get you feeds back. I have the whole story done if I get enough REVIEWS i'll update its now up to you guys. REVIEWS ARE LOVELY:]