Prequel As You Were

One-Shot

Author: Lolly4Holly

Pairings: Nick/Greg - Mpreg

Summary: Greg coming to terms with the changes in his life.

I wrote this one shot shortly before writing the sequel 'As Much as Things Change'. It is set just before 'As You Were'. Please let me know what you thought, thanks so much for reading.

Hesitantly stepping into the next aisle of the store, Greg widened his eyes, taking in the sight of all the baby products. He subconsciously pulled down the over sized sweatshirt he was wearing a little more, giving another expectant mother a smile as she made her way past him. She didn't quite look as big as he did, but she was quite a petite woman and he only had a few more weeks to go.

She probably just thought he was an extremely overweight guy since it was all in his midsection, but then again, he could have been mistaken for a very butch female as his hair had been growing thicker and softer lately.

He rarely went out in public since the size of his belly started to get more noticeable. He hadn't even been into work lately. His close friends at work knew where he was and what was happening, but according to everyone else he was taking an extended vacation after the loss of their friend and colleague, Warrick and the mysterious disappearance of his boyfriend and the father of his unborn baby, Nick.

The truth was, he didn't know the first thing about having a baby, let alone looking after one. He refused to believe that there was really one growing inside of him at first, but the increasing size of his stomach and frequent doctor's appointments where he got to see the baby moving around was proof enough. He just hoped that he could make it through the delivery part of bringing a baby into the world.

It was the part that scared him the most at the moment.

"I asked at the front desk, but they don't have any more in stock." His mother appeared beside him, carefully setting the sealed box of baby bottles into the shopping cart he had in front of him. "We'll have to check somewhere else."

"Why would I need more than two anyway? The baby is only going to have one mouth." Greg hoped, letting her take over pushing the shopping cart.

"Trust me, you'll need a lot more than two bottles if you're ever planning on getting any sleep or going to the bathroom. You won't always have time to wash and sterilise your only two bottles for the baby." The woman informed him, leading the way through the mountains of clothing types, towards a newborn section in the middle. "Any idea on what colours we should go for yet?"

Greg shook his head, adamant on keeping the baby's gender a surprise until it was born. "Maybe this wasn't such a good idea." He held his side as the baby kicked him, feeling completely out of his element again. He already knew that he wasn't ready for a baby, but shopping for this little person was starting to make it all seem a little more real.

"You'll need quite a few of these little body suits." Jean picked out a simple white one from the rack with poppers on the underside. "You'll be changing them so much that it would be easier with something like these. Or even these." She reached for an all in one suit next, checking the size inside. "We should get a few of these too. Are you going for regular nappies or the reusable ones?"

"I don't know." He shrugged, taking hold of the clothes she had in her hands. "The disposable kind I guess. What do they sleep in?"

"Well they sleep quite a bit when they're newborns, so you can put them in a body suit or the all in one. You can also buy the all in ones with the little footsie bits on them. They get cold quite easily, but you always wriggled out of your socks and mittens that we put on you, so you might want those full body suits for night time." She smiled as her son looked so overwhelmed. She took a step closer to him, gently putting her arm around him. "I'm gonna be here with you every step of the way. It's comes naturally after a while. You'll be changing em and putting them into bed like it's a natural thing to do before you know it."

"I never wanted a baby though. Having a family and all that was always Nick's thing, now he's run off and left me, so I have to raise his kid on my own. I'm not even paternal. I don't know how to talk to kids or what they want, now I have to raise one by myself."

"You won't be by yourself. You'll always have your father and I, as well as this little one." She motioned towards his stomach. "You never know, you might actually like being a parent."

Greg looked round as he heard a baby crying, watching a frustrated young woman wheeling a pushchair in front of her as she held onto her screaming baby in her arms. "Somehow I doubt that." He responded to his mother, letting her show him what else he'd need to take care of this baby that he wasn't even sure he really wanted.

Two weeks later, he got his first experience of his own screaming baby. He preferred it at the hospital as there were nurses all around him, happy to help him out whenever the newborn baby boy cried, but at home with his parents, it was all up to him to sort out his needs. He got away with passing the baby off to his mother whenever she was around, but he was stuck with him on his own for the first time just a few days later and it wasn't a nice experience.

"Please..." He pleaded with the crying newborn, carefully setting him down on the bed to check his diaper again. "You're completely dry, why are you still crying?" Flinging the blanket he was holding over his shoulder, Greg searched around for a pacifier, giving it a clean before he tried to put it in his baby boy's mouth.

His son turned his head away every chance he got, refusing to take it or give him a break.

Greg tossed the pacifier aside, grabbing a clean body suit in case the one he was wearing was uncomfortable. He unclipped the poppers over the baby's diaper, feeling as though he might break him as he tried to remove his clothes. He had only undressed himself in the past, undressing a tiny delicate newborn was proving to be his biggest challenge yet.

Unfortunately the change of clothes didn't seem to do anything though. The baby boy continued to cry, becoming very red faced as he tried to make his pleas heard.

Greg searched for where he left the last bottle he was holding a few minutes ago, only finding an empty one that had fallen beside the bed. "Okay, c'mon. Let's try and get you some food. Is that it, are you hungry? Is that what you want?" He hesitantly scooped up the infant, adjusting his tiny form against his side, before he carried him down the stairs with him.

The baby continued to scream the whole way down, showing his first signs of frustration with his father as he didn't tend to his needs.

Greg found the car seat in the front room, loading his little boy inside so he had his hands free to make up another bottle. He sat him down on the kitchen counter, rubbing his itchy stitches from his c-section as he searched for the things he needed. "One second... you have to learn to be patient. I'm not exactly experienced in this department." He called out to the crying baby, grabbing the bowl of salad from last night's dinner from the fridge for himself as he hadn't eaten anything in fourteen hours now.

He fished out a bib from the washing basket, slipping it over his red faced baby's head as he readied the bottle of formula for him. The next challenge was to try and get him to take the bottle though, which was a lot easier said than done. He turned his little head away as much as he could, opening his mouth too wide with his screams and showing more signs of frustration and protest.

"Okay, truce." Greg pulled away the bottle, setting it on the counter beside them. "What do you want then? I don't know what you want. I told you, I'm useless at this. You have to give me a sign to help me out here, kid."

The baby stopped screaming for just a moment as he spoke to him, looking up into his father's eyes with a look of curiosity. His bottom lip started trembling a moment later, bringing back his ear piercing screams of frustration.

"Ugh, you're really planning on making this whole thing difficult for me, aren't you?" He leant against the counter in front of the baby, watching his little body squirming in his restraints, while he screamed and cried as loud as his little lungs would allow. He had found it difficult to hate Nick since he abandoned him with a baby in his belly, but he was finding it a lot easier now their son wouldn't give him a moments peace.

He gently pressed the back of his hand to the baby boy's forehead, trying to tell if he was hot, but he felt the same temperature as himself. He tried with his other hand, but there was no difference. He checked his diaper again, trying to find something he had missed, but as far as he was concerned, he had checked all the boxes hours ago.

Leaving the baby's side for just a second, Greg quickly fished out the baby book he had been reading as a how to guide, trying to find a chapter on 'non-stop screaming', but they hadn't listed it. He rested the book against the counter beside the baby, searching through the chapters to find something to help him.

"I've done everything in here, but you're still crying. I knew I shoulda got the baby's for dummies book." Unlocking the buckles holding his son in, Greg lifted him against his chest, trying to gently bounce him, before he tried burping him. "C'mon, I've gotta be doing something right. You're still alive, aren't you?" He pressed his lips to the top of his head, trying to rock him to calm him down. He pressed multiple kisses to the short strands of hair on his head, humming the tune to Marilyn Manson's song 'Sweet Dreams'.

He knew his mother would disapprove, but it was the only song in his head right now.

His son started to breathe a little more between cries, changing from loud screams to soft whimpers within a few minutes. He eventually dozed off against the man's shoulder through the chorus of his next song choice, making him feel like a father since the first time he ever laid eyes on this little life.

"Sweet Dreams, Colt."