Author's note: Set in Mass Effect 2, with no characters romanced.
I always had difficulty sleeping. That was part of the job when your entire life was leading up to a suicide mission in which you, or your whole crew, would die in battle. Several nights I would awake with a start- gasping for breath and trying to calm my storming mind. The dreams became more vivid the closer and closer we got towards the final mission, and some nights I lay awake staring at my gray, bear ceiling.
But last night was different.
It was the same evening as usual…. target practice, exercising, and looking over strategies until my eyes grew too heavy to keep open. I then drug my exhausted carcass over to the massive bed, using the last of my energy to drag the comforters back and allow sleep to take me to its nightmare-filled layer.
The dream started off happy. The whole crew was there, laughing and chatting like old friends. Shepard's eyes glided over the entire group, watching each of them with a happiness that she had not felt in years. But, this could only be short-lived. The Normandy suddenly gave a massive shudder as something large struck the port side of the ship. Alarm bells sounded, and the entire group suddenly shifted straight into battle mode. Another shudder, and a massive boom resounded throughout the room as the ship slowly started to break open. "Joker?! What is going on!" Shepard screamed. "Never mind... Get to the escape shuttles!" She barked at the panicked crew. One-by-one they streamed out of the room running, running, running. Shepard stood by the door, making sure that each and every one got out of the room. Samara pushed passed Shepard, she being the last one in the room, when Shepard heard it. There was no time to react, and suddenly, the ship cracked open and the commander was sucked out into deep space.
Shepard woke with a start, a scream caught in her throat. She panted for a moment before sitting up and placing her face in her hands. The commander closed her eyes and forced her sweat covered body to breathe slowly and deliberately. A few moments passed, her hunched over body slowly relaxing which each deep breath she took. Then, Shepard let out a slow sigh... But immediately tensed back up as something resting next to her leg suddenly moved. In an instant, she dove for her gun under her pillow, while simultaneously clicking on the light perched next to her bed.
Nothing.
Save for her ragged breaths and pistol, there was nothing else in the room except her frightened self. She quickly darted up and began checking every nook and cranny within her room, determined to find the person or thing that caused so much distress. After several minutes, her search turned up completely empty and she wasn't about to go ask the crew if they saw anything while dressed in her light pajamas. With a sigh, she settled back into bed leaving the light on. Maybe it was just her nerves… It is easy to imagine things after such a traumatizing dream. She lay awake for awhile longer, wondering what could have disturbed her before sleep overtook Shepard once again.
The next morning, she dressed quickly and made her way to the eating quarters. Garrus and Tali were sitting across from each other, chatting quietly about the last mission. As Shepard walked in Tali lifted her hand to wave hello, then returned back to her conversation. She eyed each of them suspiciously from behind her cup of coffee, but their calm demeanors betrayed nothing. Shepard then dismissed the thoughts from her mind again, she had a mission to get back to. There was no point staring down her crew suspiciously over something she still wasn't entirely sure happened.
Back on deck she set a path for a Illium, determined to let the insane planet plague her thoughts instead. The mission went smoothly, shooting several mercenaries always brought her spirits up just a little bit. The day wound down quickly, and after a conversation with Mordin about a new type of disease plaguing Omega she decided to turn in for the night. She kept the light for a few minutes while tucked into bed, then Shepard decided it was stupid and clicked it off with a sigh.
That night she slept peacefully with no nightmares, and for the first time in forever she woke up feeling refreshed. The commander was ready for the next day and a fresh mission.
I guess this is what I get for trying to save the galaxy Shepard thought to herself as she hid behind another barrier, shots firing overhead. The commander jumped up and fired off several shots, killing the last of the krogan. "Clear!" Grunt shouted over the sound of her cooling gun. Thane ducked out from behind a pillar and advanced forward with his other two crewmen. Shepard turned and nodded towards him, and Thane's eyes flickered down to an opening in her armor oozing blood. Shepard's eyes flitted down to the wound, and she quickly pressed her hand to the site. "Let me help you." Thane rasped while clicking on his omni tool. The medi-gel worked quickly and the pain immediately subsided. Thane held out a hand and helped the injured warrior to her feet. "Come on, let us move forward" she commanded. With that he nodded, and the team advanced ahead. The rest of the krogan were easy targets, and within a few minutes they retrieved an artifact from clan Weylock for her friend Urdnot Wrex. "I hope this was worth it" Grunt muttered under his breath. With that, they turned around and headed back to the clan camp.
Later that evening, after many thanks from Wrex, the crew safely climbed aboard the Normandy and headed to their quarters. Shepard did the same, collapsing on her bed still wearing her sweaty clothing from the raid earlier that day. She slipped into a nightmare before peace could even settle into her tired bones.
The nightmare had been slightly different this time, instead her team was back on Tuchanka and her wound would not stop bleeding no matter how many medi-gel her crew used. The darkness began to envelop her as the blood loss became too much, and Shepard almost welcomed the chance to leave this world behind. The commander's eyes shot open as she jolted awake. The rapid breathing overtook the women, and she gasped for enough oxygen for her tired lungs. Then, she felt it. She was sure of it this time, there was someone or something lying next to her. The commander could feel it's weight shift off of the bed as she twisted to reach the light. The glow bathed the area in light, but no one was there. Who or whatever it was, it had left the room silently with no trace except it's warmth on the opposite side of the bed. That is it, this ends. Shepard lept out of her bed, shrugged on a jacket, and ran out of her door. Her eyes darted around the hallway. Nothing. She quickly checked the elevator. Nothing. Frustrated, the commander turned and went back to to her room to see if they doubled back. An hour after checking all of the crew's rooms and her own, she was left with no answers. The woman kicked her bed in anger and settled on the end clutching her pistol. I must be going insane. Shepard thought to herself. Now she was too jumpy to go back to bed, so she stayed up going over the log books unitl the morning.
Bag under her eyes revealed a bad night's sleep, and the crew was smart to steer clear of the grumpy commander. This day was going to suck.
That Evening
She contemplated sleeping on the couch, maybe it would be safer. Shepard had shared with Garrus her worries earlier, but he just looked at her like she was going insane. The commander shrugged it off, and wished the turnian a pleasant night's sleep…. Hopefully he would sleep better than the warrior did. The commander decided to lay awake with her pistol in hand tonight, and with luck she would catch her intruder.
Hour clicked by, and the woman lay awake waiting patiently. Then, she heard it. A soft clink above her. This is it! Her heart rate increased as the epinephrine pulsed through her body. In a flash, she snapped on this light as the room was bathed in its light glow. The pistol popped up and Shepard aimed at the intruder.
"Thane?" she whispered in shock.
The drell paused and stared back at the commander. "What are you doing here!?" She screamed. Thane did nothing more than blink at her, oblivious to the weapon pointed at his skull. "Start talking!" Shepard barked. Not a word from the assassin. "Don't you know you are not allowed in here? You could have been killed! I'm a good shot you know." Her pistol clicked as a shudder passed through her. "Really Thane? This could have been the death of you! Why are you here? Respond!" Thane advanced forward slowly toward her bed. "Stay back!" Shepard barked, but he just ignored her. He stepped closer and closer, and Shepard wondered why she had not fired yet. Her whole body had gone numb, and it took everything just to keep the pistol raised. Now, he moved next to the bed and placed his cool hands over her's. "It is alright Shepard. It is alright." Thane whispered, and with that her arm fell limp. The drell slowly slipped the weapon out of her hand and sat himself next to the commander.
Shepard's eyes followed his every move, and her expression begged for an answer. "Was it you all along?" She questioned. After a short pause, Thane nodded. "Why?" She asked. "Because. I know the look of defeat when I see it. It was an expression carved on my face for the last ten years, before I joined the Normandy. Now I have a purpose. A mission. A reason to no longer feel defeated. You, on the other hand" He gestures toward shepard. "Feel it everyday. I can hear you scream from your nightmares through the vents into my room. I couldn't just ignore it, not when I had felt the same way only a short while ago. So I came up here one night. You were experiencing another nightmare, and I tried to wake you up but still you slept. I laid next to you, to offer my comfort in your sleep. Immediately, you began to calm and the nightmare seemed to lessen." Thane looked away, sighed, and looked back. "You're not alone Shepard. You have a million burdens that I cannot carry, but you are not alone. I come up here to help... I hope you realize that." His eyes shifted downwards. Shepard took a moment to breath in and contemplate what the drell had said. His eyes snapped up, and suddenly her arms were around him. She clutched him tightly, and it took Thane a moment to respond. His arms snaked up her back, and he wrapped them around the defeated commander. They sat there for awhile, Shepard silently crying as she clutched Thane with everything she was.
That night, he lay next to Shepard… This time a guest instead of intruder. Her sleeping form was wrapped around his own, her breath warm against Thane's skin. The drell slowly stroked her hair and planted a light kiss on her forehead. She stirred only slightly, but Shepard continued in her dream state void of nightmares. The last thing he was going to do was let this woman out of his sight, and Thane would protect her with everything he was. She was no longer alone. His last thought was drawn the goddess Arashu, and how in every way this woman resembled the warrior angel Siha. The title seemed more than fitting.
Thane nestled closer to the woman, and sleep quickly overtook him as the two lied entwined together.