The Detective and the D.A.

I sat in the bar we normally went to after rough cases. Today's case wasn't all that bad. I was here for another reason entirely. All my life I've only dated men but something had slowly changed in me. Taking another sip of my Amaretto sour, I thought about our D.A. Alex Cabot. When she first came to SVU we didn't get along. It was just her being new but soon enough everyone became comfortable around her. "Olivia?"

I shook my head lightly when I heard Dr. Huang's voice behind me. Turning to the side, I forced a quick smile. "Hey, how's your time off been?"

"It's been alright. I'm glad to be coming back tomorrow." He paused and took a seat next to me. "Are you alright Olivia?" When I didn't answer, he continued. "If there's something bothering you, you can talk to me. And it will stay between us."

I looked back at my drink like it had all the answers I needed. "I know I can. We've known each other long enough that I've been able to trust you. It's just..."

"You have trouble opening up because of your past." His voice was light.

While I was on the clock, it was easy being strong. The issues came once I was off the clock. That's when my mind kept wandering to Alex. "What do you do when you can't stop thinking about someone you work with on a constant basis?"

"Are you talking about Elliot?" Dr. Huang ordered a coke. He normally had a certain vibe about him when he consoled victims, but now, he was more relaxed.

"No. Not Elliot." My heart thundered in my chest. If I admitted whatever I was having towards Alex it would be real. It would be out in the open. "It's Alex."

"Cabot?" For some reason Huang didn't sound surprised. All I did was nod and took another gulp of the dark liquid. "It's not surprising you've developed feelings for her. The two of you work close together and can relate to each other. Besides Melinda, you and Alex are the only other women in the unit."

"I've always dated men. I know that women's sexuality is more fluid then men's but I've never thought about women." I waved to the bartender to pour me a second drink.

"What are you going to do about it?" I felt Huang's eyes on me.

Pinching the bridge of my nose, I sighed. "I don't know. I really don't."

"Well you're obviously not ready to talk about it so I won't push you. But know that when you are ready to talk about it, I'm here. We don't have to talk at the office."

"Thanks. I appreciate it."

Huang gave me a nod before standing. "You're welcome." I watched as he paid and walked out the door.

Xxx

The second I walked into the station work started. Cragen called me into his office and said there was a murder earlier this morning and that Elliot and Munch went to the scene. I was needed in the D.A.'s office and then to interrogation one. A teenage girl was heading our way from the hospital. She had been raped by her ex-boyfriend.

As I approached Alex's office, I heard her on the phone with a judge. "Yes, I understand but I'm too connected to the case to…I know she asked for me but….okay. I'll be there at ten." Alex huffed in irritation after she ended the call.

"Never an easy day." I leaned against the doorframe. Alex looked stressed. Her long blonde hair was tousled from fingers being run through it multiple times. She had set her glasses on a stack of paperwork and pinched the bridge of her nose. "Cragen said you needed to see me."

"Yes, come in Olivia." Alex leaned back in her chair, folding her hands across her stomach.

I did as she asked and closed the door behind me. "What's wrong?"

"The case I'm about to leave for will take all day and I can't be disturbed. If anyone needs anything, please have them call someone else. My phone will be off."

"Yeah I can do that." There was something she wasn't telling me. Her blue eyes were stormy with emotion. "Is everything alright?"

Alex didn't answer for a moment. Debating whether or not to tell me what was wrong. "This case, it's personal. The only reason I'm taking it is because I was asked for by the defendant."

I didn't know what to say. This case was more personal than she let on. "Good luck."

"Thank you." Alex gave me a soft smile before picking up her briefcase and placing paperwork inside.

Xxx

It was nearly eleven by the time our last case was closed. To say it has been a long day was an understatement. I saw Alex sneak in a few hours ago but didn't have time to see how court went. "Hey Liv, you going home?" Elliot pulled on his coat.

"Yeah I'm going shortly. I'm just going to check on Alex before I go."

"Drive safe." I told Elliot I would and he left.

I knocked lightly on Alex's cracked door. "Alex?" Her light was on but when there was no answer I walked in. "Alex?" The blonde jumped and looked in my direction. "I didn't mean to startle you."

"It's okay Olivia." Alex paused and leaned back, rubbing her temples. "You're here late."

"I can say the same for you. How was court?" I walked in and took a seat in one of the guest chairs. Alex looked exhausted.

"It was difficult. As I said earlier, the case was personal." I knew Alex couldn't elaborate too much.

"Have you eaten since lunch?" I'm not sure what I was doing. Or where the question came from.

Alex just watched me a moment. "Not since lunch. I haven't had time. Why?"

"I've not either. Want to grab a bite before heading home?"

"Sure. I think the only place open is that sports bar down the road." I watched as Alex grabbed her coat and briefcase. Once she locked up, we left for the bar.

The bar was surprisingly empty for a Friday night. "Take a seat ladies and I'll be right with you." Alex and I went to the back corner table and waited for the waitress.

"There's something on your mind Olivia." Blood drained from my face as Alex opened her menu. "I don't have to be a detective to see that something is bothering you."

I couldn't tell her, could I? I didn't even know if she was into women. "Just work."

Alex looked at me over the rim of her glasses. "I'm glad you can lie better than that."

"So, what can I get for you ladies?" The perky, average build woman in her mid twenties came towards us. We placed our orders and she walked away.

"It's personal issues." I looked away trying not to lock eyes with the blonde. Alex's blue eyes were burned onto me. She was the type of person you wanted to spill your heart out to if you trusted her. That was one reason she was such a good D.A.

"The reason today's case was so hard is because it dealt with hate crimes against gay women." I looked back towards Alex. This was her finally opening up. It only took her three years.

"It's personal because you're…" I let my voice trail off. Not that I had a problem with it, but I didn't know if Alex wanted it announced in public.

"Correct." Alex watched every move I made. She studied me like I do perps in interrogation. "Now, is there something you want to tell me Olivia?"

She knew. How did she know? "How long have you know?"

Alex sighed with a soft smile. "For awhile now. I just waited for you to say something. I noticed about a year ago that something started eating at you. But then I was forced to leave. Everything was clear to me when we had to say goodbye the night I had to go into protective custody." My throat constricted and I looked away. That night almost killed me. "I thought about you while I was gone. I wondered what you were up to. How you were. There was a lot we needed to discus when you came and stood guard over me before I came back. But that wasn't the time or the place."

Before I could reply, the waitress came with our food. "Here you are; one bacon cheeseburger and one BBQ plate. Let me know if I can get you anything else."

"Thank you. And yeah." I paused. "I thought about you too. I wanted to find you but it would have put you in danger." Thinking back, I wondered if Alex heard what I said after she was shot. "When you were shot…"

"I heard everything you said while I was on the concrete bleeding out. I was in shock and couldn't reply. I think it was then that started to realize you had feelings for me." Alex's voice was soft and even; coaxing me to look her in the eyes.

"So what now?" I wasn't used to feeling vulnerable. I was a strong woman but this scared me. Alex was one of my close friends and I couldn't lose her. Not again.

"Well, that depends, Olivia." There was tenderness in Alex's ice blue eyes. "It doesn't take a detective to realize how I feel."

I could feel my heart speed up. "After this…"

"Sure."

Xxx

I was nervous as we entered Alex's apartment. "Would you like a glass of wine Liv?"

"That would be nice." I watched as Alex slid out of her coat and hung it next to mine. Her apartment was simply decorated. Definitely a place you just came to eat, sleep, and shower. "You have a nice place Alex."

"Thank you." Alex came to sit on the couch a few inches from me. "Here," she gave me a glass of red wine. "Have you ever been interested in a woman before?"

"No." I sipped the tart wine. "Before you, I've never thought about women before. And even with you, it just happened. I woke up one day and suddenly I saw you in a different light." I placed the wineglass on the coffee table and turned more towards Alex on the couch.

"I always saw you as attractive. But I never date women who are straight, bisexual, taken, or curious." My stomach dropped. Alex realized this and cupped my cheek. "But for you Olivia," Alex caressed my cheek with her thumb, coaxing me to look into her eyes. "I'll make an exception. I have those rules so I won't get hurt. I've been hurt quite a bit in the past but I trust you. And I've seen how much you care about me."

"I can understand that." I leaned into her warm touch. "And I would never hurt you on purpose."

"I know." Alex placed her wineglass on the table and leaned forward. Softly, she pressed her lips against mine. Warmth made its way through every fiber of my body as the kiss grew more passionate. Alex let her forehead rest against mine as we both gasped for oxygen. "Are you okay?"

"I'm perfect." I captured her lips once more and laced my fingers in long blonde hair. If Alex and I went public with our relationship, there would be a lot of red tape but I doubted anyone in our precinct would care. But none of that mattered to me right now. All that mattered was Alex and the fact that she was here with me.