"I don't feel so good... " Amanda's head felt heavy, full of cotton and her limbs refused to cooperate. Lee was coming back toward the cot and she reached for him, clumsy fingers grasping for him.

"Don't worry, don't worry, it's just zap gas, and right now you won't be able to move, but... let's just get comfortable. it'll only last a few minutes." He settled them down on the cot, drawing her against him, wrapping his arms around her.

For the first time in... how long had it been? She had no idea... The hours and days had bled together and stretched impossibly since Birol had taken her in the news van; but for the first time she felt safe. Lee tucked her carefully to him, resting his chin against her forehead.

As her body became too heavy to bear consciousness, she had one last thought. "It better last longer than that."

Lee was able to come out of it first, not surprising since he carried so much more body mass than Amanda. Clearing the cobwebs from his mind, he looked down at her. She rested in his arms, knocked out by the gas, but still her body was tense. Her hands were paralysed holding fast to him.

The tactical paramedics came into the room with Billy. Lee's tongue was a little thick feeling still. "Hi guys."

"You all right Scarecrow?" Daniel knew how much Lee hated medical attention.

"Yeah." Lee shifted, fighting the lingering lethargy from the zap gas.

"What about her?" Daniel reached for Amanda's left hand, pulling it away with some difficulty from Lee's chest, where her fingers clutched at his shirt. He checked her pulse.

"Uh..." Lee's heart dropped. He didn't know for sure. "She said no drugs, but he used some pretty heavy psychological techniques on her, and more than 72 hours sleep deprivation... I'm not sure she'd know if he slipped her anything." Bile pushed up his throat.

"Pulse is strong and steady. No obvious injuries other than the bruised cheek. Get some fluids into her and get her back to Doc Kelford." Daniel nodded to his partner, they moved over to work on Mara in the hallway.

Lee shifted, was going to lay Amanda back down on the cot so he could rise, but she moaned softly and started to come to herself.

"Lee?" Her right hand clutched at his sleeve and arm.

"Right here. Right here." He sat them both up more, helping her.

"Ooooh."

"Yeah. Sorry. You think you can walk?"

"To get out of here? You bet."

Billy came over and helped Amanda to stand. "Thank you, Sir."

"You all right Amanda?" He wrapped his arm right around her waist, and tucked his shoulder under her arm, taking a good deal of her weight.

"I think so, Sir." She had to clear her throat. Somehow his kindness made her want to cry. Lee wasn't a lot of help on her other side, but he was there, and squeezed her arm reassuringly.

Billy led them out to his sedan, which Lee noted, was right in the middle of the road at an angle. Billy'd arrived in a hurry. Amanda and Lee were both getting pretty steady on their feet, but still sank gratefully into the back seat. When Billy shut the door behind them, Amanda snuck her right hand into Lee's left. He squeezed hers hard, then held on. Francine got in the front, leaning over the seat to hand a bottle of water back to Amanda. Lee let go her hand to reach for it and open it for her.

"Oh, thank you Francine!" Amanda drank down almost three quarters of the bottle at once. Then she switched hands, surreptitiously reaching for Lee's again. She found it and clung to him.

"How long?" His voice was dangerously soft.

"What?" She blinked, looking at him, confused.

"How long has it been since you've had water?" He looked at her, holding her gaze. The muscle in his jaw twitched with tension. She looked away, down, out the window.

"I don't know." Her voice was very small. Lee looked straight ahead, the tension practically jumping off him. He knew... that was the problem, he knew what Birol's standard operating procedures were, and Amanda never should have been submitted to those conditions. Deliberately he took a deep breath in and slowly blew out. He gently rubbed his thumb over the top of her hand.

"Amanda," Billy said, catching her eyes in the rearview mirror, "we are heading back to the Agency. I'm sorry you can't go home just yet, but we need to debrief you."

"I understand, Sir." Amanda replied. Her brain still felt muzzy.

Before she could even think to ask, Billy reassured her, "Your family thinks you're stuck on location. They're fine. We had the house covered the whole time you were gone."

"How..." Amanda had to clear her throat. Lee looked at her, eyebrow raised. She lowered her voice and asked him directly, "How long was I gone?"

"97 hours before I got there." He watched her eyes widen as she took in that information. Emotions crossed her face too quickly to interpret. She turned away from him, drinking more of the water. He felt a fine tremor in her hand and squeezed it.

The ride back to the Agency was done mostly in silence. Lee knew he was in the doghouse for going out on his own. Francine was still licking her wounds from her little act of insubordination, and Billy, for his part, held his temper in deference to Mrs. King. At this point he was just glad everyone was safe, and having Birol in custody would take the heat off him.

Amanda expected to be ushered into one of the stark small rooms equipped with recorders and stenographer stations; instead Lee kept his hand on her elbow and guided her straight to medical. She panicked for a moment when he went to leave her, grabbing for his sleeve, but caught herself, and let go.

Lee noticed.

He soothed his hand on her upper arm. "Doc Kelford just needs to check you over Amanda. Just a couple of minutes. I'll be right here when you're done, OK?"

She felt foolish at her anxiety and took a deep breath. "Sure."

Dr. Kelford was slightly too young and professional to be considered fatherly, but he still had that Marcus Welby way about him. He clearly had already been briefed, because he avoided the general questions, instead honing in on specifics like how often she had eaten and had water, had she been hit anywhere except the face, and did anything hurt? He looked in her eyes, drew several vials of blood, and made her drink three paper cups of water.

"Thank you Mrs. King. We'll run the bloodwork right now and let you know before you're done debriefing."

"Oh." Her brain still felt like it wasn't quite functioning right. Her head ached a little too, should she tell him that? She wasn't quite sure what they were going to let her know?

Dr. Kelford must have seen the confusion on her face. "Just a precaution, Amanda. They might have drugged your food, or... well... it sounds like a few good nights' sleep are all the prescription you're going to need, but we need to be sure."

"OK. Thank you, Sir." Amanda slid off the examining table and headed out the door. True to his word, Lee was there, though he was just walking up to the door.

"All set?"

"Yeah. I guess so." Fatigue was crashing down on Amanda now that she was in a safe, familiar environment. She couldn't stifle a yawn.

"We won't be too long, I promise." Lee's hand found the small of her back, reassuring and warm. She was hungry after the doctor's questions about food. She couldn't remember how long it had been since they had given her a box with cold french fries and greasy cold chicken. She had nibbled at it, since it was the only food they'd given her, but nerves kept her from eating much. Now her stomach and headache were reminding her her body needed fuel almost as much as sleep.

They did end up in one of the small rooms which Amanda thought of as interrogation rooms. But Billy was there, and he left the door open and she didn't feel as threatened as she might have. Dr. Quidd sat quietly off to the side. One of the girls Amanda recognized from 'Lee's' steno pool sat at the machine. After a reassuring squeeze on her shoulder, Lee left, which worried her.

They began with her role in the early morning operation. She was just getting to the part where Birol showed up at the van. Her palms were sweating. She wished Lee was there.

And then he was.

He swept into the room with a large paper take out cup, setting it before her. She immediately recognized it.

"Oh." Her eyes widened in delight. "A chocko-blocko shake from Marvelous Marvins! How did you know I was starving?" Amanda rambled while she stuck the straw into the thick ice cream frappe. She looked up when she felt the strained silence. Lee had blanched. The muscle ticked in his jaw. Billy looked down.

Only Dr. Quidd was willing to meet her gaze. "It's a good choice, Mrs. King. Some fast calories and generally well tolerated by the stomach."

"Thank you." She took another long drag on the straw-but not so much as to start a cold headache. With that, she realized these people dealt with this, somewhat regularly. It was old hat to them. She didn't need to be worried or embarrassed, she just needed to tell them what happened.

Lee pulled his chair up next to her at the small table. Casually he angled himself so that his lower leg touched hers underneath the table. It was all the contact he dared under the scrutiny of the interrogation room, but he couldn't stand just sitting there listening to her recount her captivity.

"The place he took me was just a bare room, nothing in it. The light was always on, and there would be loud music. Usually if I sat down, he -Birol- would come in and make me stand up. I don't really know how long it was, I started losing track of time pretty early."

Amanda paused, looked down at her hands clasped on the table. "He kept asking if I knew who Nightcrawler was, and I didn't, so that helped because I could only say no. He showed me pictures a couple of times, but the only one I recognized in the pictures was Lee-and I didn't say anything, but somehow he knew I worked at the Agency with Lee... " She took the small napkin that was with the shake, crumpling it in her hands, rolling it over and over.

She broke off, glancing quickly at Billy for his reaction. "I didn't say anything... " Her voice broke. Lee saw her hands shaking and had to dig his nails into his palms to keep from reaching over to hold her.

"It's OK, Amanda, he made us at the airport," Lee interrupted. He looked at Billy, who nodded for him to continue. "When you called out to me. You saved my life-they saw that. " Lee shrugged.

Exhaustion was dragging at Amanda. She drank a little more of the shake, and yawned. Billy redirected her, wrapping up the debriefing.

Her hands started to shake again when she recounted Birol painting the latex on her face. She clasped them together on the table to try to stop them. Lee shifted, pressing his leg against her, frustrated at his impotence to help her with this. She didn't look at him, but she took a deep breath and let it out slowly.

True to his word, Doctor Kelford showed up just as they were finishing. Amanda felt as if she could fall asleep right in the hard chair in the bright interrogation room. Doctor Quidd stepped out and conferred with Doctor Kelford for a moment, then Doctor Kelford came in. Nervous adrenaline had Amanda waking up slightly.

"Mrs. King, everything checks out fine. You are moderate-to-severely dehydrated, and suffering from extreme fatigue. Your blood counts are a little low, but that's to be expected. You are to eat several good, healthy meals, to sleep as much as you can, and to drink lots of fluids."

"Great." She yawned.

"Come on... " Lee stood, his hand finding her back again, and not straying until she was settled into the passenger seat of the Corvette.

As soon as he'd pulled into traffic, he tentatively began, "The boys are with Joe for the weekend, and since you are 'out of town on a shoot,' your mother decided to go out with her 'friend' Captain Curt..." he glanced over only to find she had already fallen asleep.

Arriving at his apartment he pointed to Amanda and gave his doorman the universal sign of 'quiet'. Charles liked Mrs. King very much, and liked even more what Mrs. King had done for Mr. Stetson; so not only did he hold the door for Mr. Stetson when he carried the sleeping Mrs. King in, he went up in the elevator with them and took the keys, opening the apartment door too.

Lee set Amanda down on the couch. Alone and safe at last, he couldn't help but linger, tracing a feather touch over her bruised cheek, pushing the bangs off her forehead. Something beneath his diaphragm loosened for the first time in four days and he finally felt like he could take a breath.

But he knew it wasn't over.

With a heavy sigh, he stood. First he removed Amanda's sneakers, then covered her with the afghan. Next, he headed for the shower, leaving the bathroom door ajar in case she called for him. He let the hot water pound away the tension in his shoulders and neck.

He dressed in a black tee shirt and baggy sweatpants. He checked on Amanda, who appeared to have not moved. In the kitchen he found chicken and rice soup in the freezer and put it in a pot to thaw and cook. When it was ready, he filled two bowls, and brought them into the livingroom. He returned to the kitchen for a big glass of orange juice for Amanda, and a beer for himself.

He hated to wake her, but she needed food and fluids. She'd end up worse off if he let her sleep without eating. "Amanda?" He spoke softly. Her startle reflex would be over the top for a while. "Amanda?"

She woke with a gasp, eyes snapping open. Lee immediately spoke. "Amanda, it's ok. You just need to eat something and drink some juice." He saw when she registered where she was, and only then did he reach to gently touch her, pushing the bangs out of her eyes.

"Oooh. I'm so tired," she complained.

"I know, but you have to eat. And drink some juice."

With a sigh she pushed herself up. Lee didn't miss the wince that crossed her face. He got back up to get the aspirin, and when he returned, put it on the coffee table. He handed her one of the bowls of soup, then sat next to her.

She cautiously tasted. "Mmmm." It was just simple homemade chicken stock, mirepoix and rice, but sometimes simple was the best remedy. Lee waited for her to question him as to why she was at his apartment. It never came.

They finished their soup in companionable silence. She downed three aspirin with her orange juice. "Shower?" He asked, "or bed?"

"Oh, definitely shower." She answered, wrinkling her nose when she looked down at her rumpled and soiled shirt. She might just throw that shirt away.

He'd already set out towels for her, and a flannel shirt of his and sweatpants. The hot water felt heavenly. Not for the first time, Amanda wondered if this was another elaborate hallucination. She didn't want to be alone, and yet she didn't feel like she could face her mother and the boys just yet either-she wanted to see them, but she felt so... fractured.

And somehow as if conjured from her imagination, here she was, eating chicken soup and being coddled... She used Lee's shampoo, and the scent she normally associated with him grounded her and she began to relax and believe it was real. She used his soap, the familiar fragrance wrapping her in a sense of security.

When she got out of the shower she threw the blouse she had been wearing into the trash. She hand washed her panties and bra in the sink and with a grin hung them on the towel rack in the shower to dry. He'd have to get used to such things if he really meant to marry her, now, wouldn't he.

The thought sobered her slightly. She hadn't asked why he brought her to his apartment rather than home. Certainly he wouldn't expect... just because she said she would marry him... her head started to hurt again a little. She was being foolish.

The scotch plaid flannel shirt was thick and soft and fell mid thigh. The sweatpants were equally as soft and she had to roll the waistband several times. She padded out to the kitchen in bare feet. Lee turned just as she entered, another large glass of juice in his hand. Her breath caught a little at the sight of him.

"Here, as much more as you can... " He looked worried.

"Thanks. I'm fine Lee. Doctor Kelford said so." She sipped at the juice, then yawned.

"I think you fell asleep before you heard me in the car, your mother went out with her 'friend' since the boys were going to Joe's for the weekend."

Her face fell a little. "It's the weekend?"

"Yeah. It's Friday night." He watched her.

"I lost the whole week... " She wrapped both hands around the juice glass, looking down into it. She started to say something else, but stopped.

"C'mon... let's get you into bed. Doctor's orders." Lee took the juice from her, and pressed that compelling hand against her back. Her stomach fluttered a little as they walked toward the bedroom. She'd been in there before, of course, but never in his bed.

"I'm just going to leave the juice on the nightstand, you'll probably be thirsty in the night."

Amanda yawned again, and upon entering the bedroom, felt inexorably drawn to the bed. He'd already turned down one side and moved the extra pillows. With a sigh, she climbed between the luxurious sheets. She could get used to 800 thread count.

Lee sat on the edge of the bed, pulling the covers up tenderly. She settled on her side, facing him, and reached for his hand. "Are you ok?"

"You're asking me that?" He shook his head. "Of course you are. You're Amanda." He wrapped both of his hands around her one, then raised it to his lips and tenderly kissed her knuckles. "I'm more than OK as long as you're here, safe."

She wanted to talk to him more, but she just couldn't keep her eyes open. "It's all right Amanda, go to sleep. I'll be right here." So she did.

o o o

"LEE!" The scream tore from her throat, waking her. Hands held her shoulders and for several moments she blindly fought them. Finally his soft voice penetrated her panic. "You're safe Amanda, you're safe. It's over. I'm here."

When she stopped fighting him, she collapsed against him, breathing as if she had just run a marathon. Those perfect hands soothed slow circles against her back and shoulders.

"Lee... " Her voice was barely a broken whisper.

"I know... I know."

Shudders wracked her. Without warning she felt the saliva build in the back of her throat. "Oh, no..." She pulled away from him, scrambled off the bed, racing for the bathroom. She barely made it in time to lose the contents of her stomach. When she could breathe again, she realized Lee was holding her hair back. With the absurd urge to chuckle, she thought it was probably the most romantic thing anyone had ever done for her. She sat down on the floor, back propped against the side of the tub and he handed her a cool damp washcloth. She washed her face off then draped it on the back of her neck. Lee handed her a cup of water which she sipped gratefully.

After a few minutes, he reached his hand to help her up. "Think you're OK?"

"Yeah." She replied wearily. He pulled her to a standing position and took the washcloth from her. He drew her into his arms and just stood, holding her. She let her head drop to his shoulder. A stray shiver snaked up her spine. He soothed his hand after it. When he felt her waver on her feet, he led her back to bed and tucked her in, much as before.

"Now I don't want to go to sleep," she whispered, anguished.

"I know." Lee frowned, gently feathering the bangs off her forehead, letting his hand come to rest cradling her cheek. She turned into his touch.

"You knew I'd have nightmares..." He wasn't sure if it was a question or an accusation.

"Yeah."

"That's why you brought me here."

"I didn't want you to be alone... " His thumb gently brushed on her face. "It's called delayed stress and it's really normal."

"So there will be more?"

"Probably."

"How can you make them go away?"

"Well, Quidd insists that talking about it helps." Lee chuckled darkly. "Sometimes a nice hot toddy helps. It's better when you're not as exhausted... I don't know... just time, too I guess."

"I had a few nightmares after those Soviet agents thought I was you... but... " her shoulder lifted and settled again, his flannel shirt sliding down a bit.

"This is different Amanda. Birol... " he paused, seemed to have trouble saying the word out loud, "tortured you... "

"Oh, no, that's not true... I mean, he only hit me a couple of a times... that's not... "

"Amanda-" Lee cut her off.

She looked at him, his changeable eyes were cloudy green. "Sleep deprivation, witholding food and drink... and hitting are torture." The quiet words seemed as if they were forced from him. She shivered again. His hands came up to cup her shoulders. "And I know Birol, he used a lot of physical intimidation and pressure."

Her flinch spoke volumes. He drew her to him, not for the first time wondering how he would have survived if he had not found her. She seemed to melt, boneless against him. When he felt her breathing become regular, he started to set her back down.

"No..." Her voice was very small. "I don't want to go to sleep. I might wake up and this will all have been a dream too." She rubbed her cheek against his shoulder. The light from the bathroom caught the silvery trail of tears starting.

"I'll be right here, on the couch... "

But she stubbornly held on to him. "Stay?"

Lee couldn't resist her. She so rarely asked anything of him, and so often gave everything of herself.

"OK. Hang on a minute." Mollified, she let him tuck her in again. He then got up to shut off the main bathroom light, but left the shower light on. Then he came around the other side of the bed, (his side,) and got on top of the covers. He turned on his side and found Amanda.

Just as they had at on the cot at Birol's hideout, they fit together perfectly. With his thumb he reverently wiped the tears from her face. "I don't know why I'm crying now." She sniffled.

"It's all right. You cry if you need to." Lee pulled her close, tucking her to him.

"Lee?" Her voice was sleepy.

"Mmm?" She felt his voice rumble, rather than heard it.

"Who was there for you?" He shifted uncomfortably, not wanting to answer this particular question. He stalled, running his fingers through her hair. Before long her breathing became light and regular and she relaxed in his arms. His own breath sighed out as his lips rested on her forehead.

o o o

Amanda fought rising to consciousness. A tiny niggle of fear told her she would be in an empty room. But she was surrounded by warmth, and softness... and as her senses returned she felt herself gently rising and falling. She opened her eyes, the room was just dusky with the purple light of dawn. Lee still lay on top of the covers, but they were pushed down closer to her waist. He was on his back, and she was on... him. She was on her side, but mostly draped across his chest, his shoulder her pillow. Even in sleep, his arms remained wrapped around her, holding her safe.

It wasn't a dream.

He had come. He had found her. He had asked her to marry him. And last night he had brought her home because he didn't want her to be alone.

Always a light sleeper, he must have sensed her change in breathing, even though she hadn't moved.

"You OK?" His arms tightened just slightly around her, his lips finding her forehead. She thought his voice raspy with sleep was perhaps the sexiest thing she'd ever heard.

"Yeah," she replied softly, her hand creeping up to touch his sandpaper stubble jaw.

"Bad dream?" He shifted a little bit, but settled.

"No." She paused. "This definitely is the best dream yet."

He smiled, his thumb lazily tracing back and forth on her arm. They both went back to sleep.