Summary: Brennan joins Booth in his therapy session. No pairings it's just a one shot. My first so be nice.
Disclaimer: I don't own anything. I'm borrowing.
"Booth, remind me again why I'm doing this?"
"Because, Bones, the sooner I convince this guy I'm not completely nuts, the sooner I can get back to work and the sooner you can play around with your cadavers." Booth massaged his temples with his free hand.
"But why me?" Brennan asked for the fifth time during the car ride.
"Because Doctor Wyatt will sign my papers if I bring him a tasty anthropologist to sacrifice."
"You know that book I'm reading about getting along with your co-workers? It says that sarcasm is never helpful. I can lend it to you if you want."
The black SUV pulled up to a quaint English house with a newly built barbeque block in the front yard. Booth routinely took off his glasses, straightened his tie and stroked his neatly gelled hair before striding up the path. Doctor Wyatt came out to greet them, with a friendly smile for Booth and an enthusiastic handshake for Brennan.
"Doctor Temperance Brennan it's wonderful to meet you at last. I've heard charming things about you from Agent Booth." This provoked a wide smile from Brennan as Booth fought to stop his cheeks from turning pink.
"Okay Doc whats the deal today, 'cause I've done everything that you've asked so far but I'm not fighting it out with Bones." Booth flung his arms about a bit.
"What?!" Both Brennan and Wyatt looked offended and confused.
"No, no, today we are going to try some role playing." Wyatt looked immensely proud of himself.
"Oh, oh, me first, me first!" Doctor Brennan jumped up and down holding her arm in the air.
"What are you like in fifth grade?" Booth scoffed as Brennan stuck out her tongue to prove some point.
Doctor Wyatt smiled at her enthusiasm as he led them both into his house.
"Doctor Brennan you will play Agent Booth, and Agent Booth you shall play Temperance. Be as artistic as you like I'm looking to see the interaction between the both of you, oh and Agent Booth, be nice."
Booth shot Wyatt a cold glare but said nothing as Brennan stationed herself outside of the door to make her grand entrance. Without warning the door was flung open and Brennan came striding in with her chest puffed out and her shoulders back. Her head was held as high as her newly adjusted waistband as she entered the room.
"What are you doing?" Booth's horrified expression said it all.
"What? I'm swaggering!" Brennan placed her hands on her hips and struck a pose.
"I don't swagger. And besides it looks like you've shoved a pole up my ass, kindly remove it." His brow furrowed and he hung his head in embarrassment and shame.
"You cannot simply remove a metaphorical pole from one's, ass as you so keenly put it. It must be worked at and removed over time. Through therapy."
"Only because you're getting paid for it!"
Wyatt smirked. Balancing his glasses on the bridge of his nose he indicated for Brennan to continue. "Let's hear some speech from you please Temperance."
She cleared her throat and hitched up her pants after pretending to straighten her tie.
"Bones, you and your squints work the case, I'll reward you with Chinese take-out and a pat on the head. Meanwhile I'll wave around my gun and look pretty. If you're lucky I might use some of my macho muscles to pound some guys face into mince meat!"
"Excuse me that is nothing like me. Zack could do a better impression of Ozzy Osbourne."
"I don't know who that is?" Brennan stated. Booth groaned in frustration.
"Do you think I won't pop you one just because we're in the middle of therapy." Neither Booth nor Wyatt could figure out if Brennan was being serious so Wyatt moved on swiftly.
"Okay I think we need to see Agent Booth's contribution." Wyatt let out a sigh as Brennan untucked her blouse from her pants and sat down.
"Can I get a wig or something?" Booth looked around the room to spot anything he could use as a prop, he grabbed for the lampshade but Wyatt swatted away his hand.
"Agent Booth I'm sure you can manage a basic role playing activity without your personal preferences interfering." A small snort of laughter came from the armchair in the corner but Booth straightened up and readied himself for his big performance.
Flicking his none existent hair he squinted and started digging through a pile of papers on a desk.
"Of course!" Booth's face lit up and he skipped across the room. A few moments passed before he ran back across to Doctor Wyatt. "Blah blah blah, particulates, blah blah, vertebra, blah blah, something about the skull, blah blah blah. Booth, go catch the bad guy and I'll squint some more."
With Brennan looking severely unimpressed Wyatt decided to step in and end this little session.
"Okay I know exactly what is going on now. I believe I can have the two of you will be working together again in no time."
"So I'm off the hook?" Booth was ready for getting his papers signed and getting the hell out of therapy.
"Not with Doctor Brennan I assure you." Booth cringed as Brennan grunted in agreement. "But I can tell you both the cause of your stress"
"I don't have stress." Brennan stated confidently. But Booth huffing showed his disagreement. "What?"
"Let's just say it's a good thing your patients are already dead." Booth wasn't making Brennan's mood any lighter.
"Now now children. You've both got enough pent-up sexual energy to power a small mid-western town."
The room fell silent and Both Brennan and Booth looked at each other in shock and realisation. Doctor Wyatt nodded and smiled to himself.
"I'll put the kettle on then."