Disclaimer: I do not own twilight or any other materials mentioned in this story besides the plot itself.

You only know what something truly is until it either saves your life or destroys it.

I didn't know love, until I found it twice.

I didn't know pain until it destroyed me...

Twice.

I don't trust love, and I'm afraid of pain.

I came here, gave my love to him, and he shattered me.

I was broken, he fixed me, just to stomp on me and re-open the wounds.

Now, I'm a dead girl walking, worse than my 'zombie stage'.

I'm sad, angry, and slowly and torturously falling down into the void.

I like to wonder if a beautiful, loving, caring person was out there... just for me. I like to think maybe that person could come here and take the pain away, take away the sadness, to love me unconditionally. To glue me back together and not stomp on the bandages.

But how would they do that if I don't believe in love?

Emotions, to me, were wonderfully terrible. Bittersweet.

There were moments when you would be happy. joyful. content. But those emotions might be overshadowed or destroyed by sadness. anger. misery.

I hate but love emotions.

If someone came into my life, and I fell in love for a third time, could I make it?

Nonsense.

No-one's coming. No-one cares. No-one's going to save me. I'll drown forever, until the tide finally overwhelms me and I die slowly... hitting the bottom of the void.

Before Jake stopped speaking to me... he promised to take me cliff-diving. I wanted to see, now that I'm no longer clinging to Edward, if he's what I see when I get that rush.

I want to see... if I see anything.

That's what I was thinking as I approached the edge of the cliff.

I took off my bracelet, my ring, my necklace, and my shoes. I stripped down to my tight tanktop and left my basketball shorts on. I tied my ponytail up high.

Nothing yet.

I looked over the edge at the water below.

I let out a shaky breath. I wasn't at LaPush, because there was a chance of running into Jacob.

I was at the highpoint, and I checked for any dangerous rocks before I came up here.

I breathed in deep, taking in the scents of the saltwater and the trees behind me. I backed up several paces. My heart throbbed, and for some strange reason my wrist heated up, near my scar.

I sighed once more, and I sprinted forward, leaping off of the cliff.

The wind wipped my hair around, and I closed my eyes. I was in euphoria.

Images flashed in my mind.

Alice laughing her tinkling laugh while she curled my hair.

Emmett twirling me around, saying some nonsense about him winning in a videogame.

Esme hugging me, welcoming me into their home.

Carlisle smiling and saying I should visit more often.

Rosalie having those small moments where it seemed like she didn't dispise me.

Edward smiling at me as I held the camera.

Me and Embry laughing as Jake and Quil wrestled for the tenth time that week.

I couldn't help but notice I didn't see anything of Jasper.

The images had flashed so fast.

I slammed into the water, being wrestled down by waves when I attempted to come up for air.

I clinged to a rock, pulling myself up a little to get a few gasps of air. A huge wave slammed into me, pulling me into the merky seawater once more.

I struggled, panicking when I couldn't hold my breath any longer.

I involuntarily gasped, sucking in water and my vision blurring.

I stilled in the water, barely concious.

A sharp pain erupted from my wrist, like flames licking away at flesh.

I was barely holding conciousness as I looked to my wrist.

My skin tore in the shape of my scar, but no blood spilled into the seawater. As quick as it tore, my skin sewed together, adopting a metallic silver color.

Confusion reigned in all my thoughts as my conciousness slipped. My vision blurred and blackened, the taste of the saltwater in my mouth as my limp body sank into the merky depths of the sea.

th-thump.

th-thump..

th-thump...

th-thump...

th..thump...

th...thump...

th...thump...

My heart slowed, eventually keeping a slow pace, to which I doubted I could live on.

The strange burning that had come from my wrist had slowly spread to cover my arm, then across my torso and head to my other arm, and filling out to my legs, all the way to my toes.

As the flames, per se, spread, the heat of them increased, like they were feeding from me. Growing.

I could hear...

At first I heard the sound of water. Well, I didn't hear anything, but I could tell that water surrounded me and filled my ears.

I couldn't feel anything besides the horrible flames, coming in waves like tsunamis, so when I started to hear other things it confused me as to what happened.

I remembered jumping, euphoria, drowning, pain, hearing nothing, then hearing seagulls, and the things I heard varied thus far.

I heard another person. I heard them gasp. It was male. My ears were more sensitive... so I heard more details. I heard clothing rustling, mine obviously wet. Then I heard what sounded like maybe footsteps in sand, something no-one could usually hear. I heard continuous crashes of waves hitting rocks by the shore.

Someone saved me? Too late, most likely. The only tie I held to my body now was my ability to hear, and the white-hot pain coursing through me.

I was being... carried. Someone saved me from the water... and was taking me somewhere.

The pain deafened me momentarily. I felt vibrations in my throat, and my neck strained. I didn't hear a scream.

The pain grew impossibly. I could hear now.

I heard my heart keeping that deathly slow pace. Had it kept me alive so long? Or was it feebly trudging along to try to save a corpse?

I heard no breathing from the person carrying me, only short, strangled, wet gasps that croaked from my throat.

I was confused. What was this burning? Who is this carrying me, and where to? Was someone accually carrying me, or did I drown completely below that cliff, my body sinking lower into the sea, as what was left of my soul dreamed before death?

I was also scared. Scared that this was a dream, and that I was lost forever. No chance of someone saving me.

Scared also that this was real, and that someone carried my limp body as I gasped in pain, or what I thought were gasps, taking me to an unknown fate.

Scared that the pain would never end, and that I was burning in hell's inferno with delusions skimming my thoughts.

Most of all, scared of the unknown. Scared of not knowing if one of my thoughts were spot-on, or way off.

Agony. Pain. Heat. Sounds.

Gasps, mine, most likely. Twigs crunching under feet.

I concentrated. What if this is real? What's a good explanation for this burning?

My thoughts halted as I got the sense of deja vu.

Deja vu?

When was I ever in this much...pain...?

Oh!

A memory flashed in my mind, ironically moving like waving, flicking flames.

A blonde vampire leaning over me, yelling. Pain in my leg that was laughable compared to the pain I was in now.

James.

His teeth piercing my skin, the same heat that I feel all over now, spreading just near the bite.

Edward saving me.

That was the venom... it's the same as now, just now it went further.

Determination to know what's going on filled me.

I listened closely, my hearing abilities had increased further.

For a while it was the same. My gasps and screams, rustling of trees, twigs snapping, wind brushing by, leaves crunching under swift feet, shoes brushing blades of grass.

I didn't know how long I'd been in this pain. How long I'd been carried.

I could feel the pressure of someone cradling me now, running. Fast.

It was obvious my savior was not human. He had been running too long. Carrying me without effort.

Not breathing.

Suddenly the sounds shifted. His steps slowed to a human walking pace, the scuffing of shoes brushing grass blades smoothed.

Then the sounds of shoes on wood, I felt bumping beyond the flames so he was going up steps.

Going inside a house?

Thankyou for reading! R&R and I will love yoo fo-evah! :D