Go fucking figure I start loving this fandom after it's started to die... but that's why I wrote this!

So a few things. This story, the first draft is done. Which is good for people who chose to read it, because even if my inspiration dies all I have to do is edit and then post. But I have so much college course work I'll probably still only be able to post like once a week.

Also. A few more things. There will be smut. So I'm aging Warren up a year so there's no underage business, because the first written out sex scene will be after Warren's birthday. So he'll be a legal adult. It just feels weird to me writing underage as a person who's legally an adult so I aged him up. No big deal.

Also in this au, Rachel Amber isn't missing, Jefferson doesn't exist, Chloe still goes to Blackwell but she lives at home with her mom and stepdick, Nathan's friends in the Vortex Club genuinely love and care about him, Nathan has bipolar disorder, Warren's family is poor as shit, and Blackwell is a four-year high school. I'm probably forgetting something but... I'll come back and fix this as I remember.

Anyways, please enjoy the story and reviews are always appreciated.

Nathan let out a deep sigh as he examined the yellowing bruises on his ribs. He poked at them, wincing at the pain, before pulling his plain black t-shirt down. He tried his hardest not to think about how the bruising happened. There was no point. He's already spent too much time wondering why it happened and how he could have prevented it. He continued to came to the same conclusion: he didn't know.

He didn't need to be thinking about that shit, anyways. He had a party to get ready for.

As with most of the other parties, he and Victoria were technically the hosts. If he wasn't ready soon and Victoria was left alone in determining if the area was fit for their guests, she'd be beyond pissed at him. She'd be furious. During the years they'd been friends, he'd only been on the receiving end of her rage a few times but it was awful. He'd do anything to avoid being in that position again, even if it meant going to the party ridiculously early. As if on cue, his phone vibrated, signaling he'd received a text. He didn't need to look to see who it was from or what it said, but he did anyways.

[Vic 9:26pm]

Ill b done in approx 2 min

Ur ass better b rdy

Nathan mutter a quiet, "Fuck..." before rummaging in his closet for the button-up Gucci shirt he and Victoria had picked out just for the occasion. He was happy that he was otherwise ready. His hair was perfectly quaffed. He'd already spritzed himself with his Giorgio Armani cologne. He finished buttoning the shirt the mere seconds before he heard a knock on the door. When he opened it, Victoria looked at him and smiled. That night was going to be fun.

Warren didn't know how he got dragged there. Well, he did know, but he didn't know how he let it happen. Max said it would be fun and he assumed that since she asked him to a party it would be something like a date. When he found out she'd gotten all dolled up by Courtney and Dana, he was certain it was a date. However, after they entered the VIP lounge of the Vortex Club party and she was whisked away by Chloe and Rachel, he had to admit defeat – it very much wasn't a date.

He knew he should have seen it coming and frankly felt like a moron for the fact that he'd been blindsided by it. Max was always getting dragged away by Rachel or Chloe or both and he couldn't blame her for letting them. They were far more interesting in a typical sort of way, with their teenage rebellion and their partying. It was easy to see how his friend could get swept up in their moments and run off on some adventure.

Warren, on the other hand, was far more mellow. He did enjoy his fair share of adventures, but on the average day he'd much rather his adventures be on some sort of screen. Whether they were carried out with a movie or some sort of game depended on the exact day. He was very comfortable with the fact that he was more of an intellectual than an adventurer. His only real issue with it was that it didn't help his romantic life, which apparently was non-existent.

He knew Max cared for him deeply, but he was beginning to come to terms with the fact that she would never like him the way he liked her. It sucked, really, and with her invite to the party and the cute little outfit she was in, he thought maybe things had changed. Then she ran off within five seconds of them being in the VIP area -which he still didn't know how she got access to- and he was left alone and with the realization that no, it was definitely not a date.

It sucked but he knew he'd get over it. He didn't want to pull any of that "Friend Zone" crap because it wasn't like she owed him anything. He valued their friendship too much to ever stoop so low. Still, he'd have at least appreciated not being left alone in what might as well have been a foreign land. He recognized a majority of the people surrounding him, but most of them would never associate themselves with him. The area wasn't really all that big, though, so he didn't understand how the trio of girls had disappeared entirely.

Oh well. At least Rachel and Chloe had been kind enough to hand him a red cup of booze before taking Max. He'd expected it to be beer, but as he brought the cup up to his lips he could smell that it was something much stronger. He was apprehensive, as he knew he was a lightweight and didn't want to get wasted. Then again, it was a Friday night, he had nothing to study for, no homework to do, and no one to play his games with since his World of Warcraft buddy was currently MIA. Might as well try to live like a normal teenager.

He sipped at the drink, surprised yet again that it was a cocktail but he couldn't quite place what it was. All he knew was there was a hint of citrus, the mixture did little to mask the taste of the alcohol, and the concoction left his mouth dry. So, like any normal teenager, he decided to just chug it and go to the bar to go get another drink. It was there that he ran into Dana and Trevor.

Dana initiated the conversation, smiling warmly when she realized it was him and yelling an enthusiastic, "Hi Warren!" over the music. He was surprised, not expecting a cheerleader of all people to talk to him, but gave a polite greeting back. He didn't even know she knew his name, but realized a moment later he shouldn't have been surprised. After all, she was a friend of Max. "You and Max should come hang with us."

Warren shook his head, noting the momentary look of surprise on Dana's face when he told her he had no idea where Max was. Dana, being the sweet person she was, told him he could hang with them sans Max if he wanted to and then promptly insisted the three take a shot in order to improve his mood.

He didn't know why he agreed to it. He'd hadn't partied much before, but something about being in the VIP section with the seasoned partiers made the irresponsible behavior all the more tempting. He'd never taken a shot before and it was obvious as the look of disgust crossed his face as the liquid slid down his throat. He learned from Dana that since the theme of the party was Dia De Los Muertos (it was November 1st after all), the only hard booze on hand was tequila.

It was his first experience with that particular type of alcohol and he'd already learned several things about it. Firstly, it was absolutely disgusting whether straight or mixed. Secondly, it took even less tequila than it did beer to really mess him up. His light weight ass was already feeling the effects. His head was fuzzy, his face warm, and everything all over felt more okay than it ever had in his life.

The members of the Vortex club all seemed very different when they were intoxicated. Some of them wanted to actually talk to him. Some even seemed excited to see him, though most likely just because he was a fresh face in this scene. At some point, he managed to bump into Max.

"Max Factor!" he yelled in excitement, a slur in his voice. He clumsily hugged her, not realizing that he was squeezing her a little too tight. "Where'd ya go?"

Max looked alarmed, something that would have concerned him if he hadn't been in that state. "How much have you had to drink Warren?"

"I finished the drink and then took a shot with Dana and Trev."

Max's eyes widened. She knew Warren couldn't handle his alcohol. "You already finished that margarita, Warren? That had like two or three shots in it!" She grabbed his arm and lead him to a couch, trying to convince him to stay there and relax while she went to get him water.

She didn't get that far, though, as Chloe ran over to try to reclaim Max before she realized what was going on. "Is Warren already hammered?" she laughed. "That's so fucking funny, dude. Fucking light weight."

"Apparently, he also took a shot with Dana…" Max regretted revealing that tidbit of information as if left her mouth, as Chloe's eyes lit up. So, she rewound and instead said, "I'm going to go get him some water. Will you keep an eye on him?"

Chloe huffed. "Yeah, fine." She intended to keep that promise, but when Rachel walked over with three shots and didn't want to wait for Max -as if they'd be able to convince her to drink it anyways- they passed it to Warren, clinking the little plastic shot glasses together before downing them.

It was nearing midnight and Nathan had lost track of how many shots he'd taken. He also had no idea how many times he'd been passed the bong. Everything was fuzzy, hazy and he was feeling pretty good. He was feeling too good, in fact. He couldn't retain his attention with the girl who was on his arm but it instead kept flickering toward a guy he didn't recognize. Courtney mentioned it was a guy from the regular high school in town and she mentioned his name.

Nathan couldn't remember the name, not that he really cared. What concerned him was how tempted he was to go over and make a move. His control was slipping as the multitude of shots he'd taken were beginning to go through his system and cause him to get more and more drunk, to lose more and more control. He stepped outside before he could do anything stupid, telling Victoria he'd be back after collecting his thoughts.

It hadn't been difficult for Warren to lose his babysitter. He hadn't even meant to. He just knew that all of a sudden he really had to go to the bathroom and a minute later he was there and Chloe was nowhere to be found. He couldn't find any of his friends or even any of the people he'd spoken to that night when he returned to the VIP section from his bathroom trip. He decided to hang out by the bar, hopeful that some he at least sometimes talked to would come by. He recognized Victoria, approaching with her posse of females, but he didn't think they'd ever said two words to each other.

That's why he was surprised when she approached him. "Hey, aren't you Max's bitch? She's looking for you."

He was beginning to wonder if he was tripping, maybe caught in some bizarre alternate reality. The Vortex Club would never be this nice to him sober, if they even acknowledged him and there he was being talked to by the Queen Bee of the club. Though she had technically called him a bitch, he knew that she meant no harm by it and it was merely just the way she talked. At least, that's what he assumed. Either way, he was too out of it to care.

The thing that did frustrate him, though, was everyone's assumptions that he was with Max. He could see why they thought that. It was blatantly obvious he liked her and he was her plus one to the party. However, wasn't it obvious to them that they weren't together? She wouldn't have run off without him if it was some sort of date. The insinuations just added insult to injury.

It was then that he realized he'd been quiet for a lengthy period of time and Victoria was looking at him like she expected some sort of response. He shrugged, far too gone to censor himself. "She's gonna have to come find me, then. I'm not goin' after her just to get ditched for Chloe and Rachel again."

He could have sworn Victoria gave him an apologetic look briefly before muttering, "What a bitch…" She grabbed two shots that had just been lined up by the bartender, handing one to Warren. "This will make you feel better."

Why did the entire Vortex Club seem to think tequila would solve his problems? Still, he wasn't used to the poplar kids being nice to him and it would be rude to refuse the drink so he, Victoria, and some of the other club members around raised their glasses before downing their shots. He had no idea how much booze he'd drank and in what span of time, it could have been minutes or hours really, but he was beginning to start to experience why people said tequila was no one's friend.

Everything was a blur after that. He headed, or perhaps was dragged, out on the dance floor even though he didn't have any idea what he was doing. He vaguely remembered making out and dancing with some random girl who he was sure he'd never seen before, whom he did another shot with before he blacked out.

Warren opened his eyes in a room he didn't recognized, his head pounding as a faint streak of light from outside hit his eyes. He reached for his phone, luckily laying on the bedside table next to a stereo, and he saw it was only six o'clock. He was beyond thirsty and was happy as he spotted a minifridge from the corner of his eye. He reached out to it, even though he wasn't anywhere near being close enough to reach it. He fell out of the bed and winced as a sharp throb went through his skull.

After he crawled his way to the fridge, chugging a bottle of water he found inside of it, it began to really hit him that he wasn't in his own room. And he was naked. He deduced he must have still been in the dorms, based on the size of the room, but it was certainly not a room he'd ever been in before. He winced as he thought he must have slept with that random girl last night and he prayed that in his drunken state he was still smart enough to use protection.

He sighed, grabbed another bottle from the fridge, and crawled back into the bed. He decided those were issues he'd deal with later, after at least a few more hours of sleep. As he pulled back the covers to lay back in the bed, he caught a glimpse of the person he'd slept with. His blood ran cold.

Uh oh.

Oh no.

Oh fuck… That was NOT good. It wasn't the girl he made out with that he went home with. It wasn't even a girl at all. Of all the people he could have gone to bed with, he was staring at an asleep, pantsless Nathan Prescott. It was strange seeing him sleeping, laying all peaceful, looking like he hadn't a care in the world. Still, he knew that look would be gone if he woke up to find "Warren Gayram" in his bed.

Luckily, it was still so early he wouldn't have to worry about anyone seeing him as he ran down the hall into his own room. He quickly grabbed his underwear and pants and threw them on, deciding to abandon his shirt when he couldn't find it, grabbed his shoes and booked it to his room. When he was safely in there, he locked the door behind him. He then threw his phone on its charger and collapsed on the bed. He knew what happened was bad and he would likely freak out again later but he was still too tired, too hung over, still a little drunk and overall wasn't in the state of mind to handle the situation yet. He quickly fell back asleep.

When he woke up hours later, his head was still throbbing but not nearly as much as it had the first time he woke up. His vision was clear, at least, though the flecks of light shining through the curtains were basically torture. However, he was happy he hadn't thrown up yet. He realized he was in quite the conundrum, because he needed pain pills but knew if he took them on an empty stomach he would just vomit them back up but if he ate it was likely he'd throw up anyways.

He grabbed his phone to check the time, seeing that it was almost noon. He also saw that he had over ten unread texts, almost all of them from Max, spanning from a little after she initially ditched him at the party to just a few minutes ago.

[Mad Max 11/01 10:46 pm]

Sorry I ran off. Where r u?

[Mad Max 11/01 11:05 pm]

Seriously, Warren, where r u?

[Mad Max 11/01 11:19 pm]

Warren! I told you to stay put!

[Mad Max 11/01 11:23 pm]

Where'd you go?

[Mad Max 11/01 11:48 pm]

I'm seriously worried about you Warren!

[Mad Max 11/01 11:59 pm]

Are you alive?

[Mad Max 12:13 am]

Warren.

[Mad Max 12:33 am]

Answer me, Warren.

[Mad Max 1:14 am]

Are you dead, Warren?

[Mad Max 8:26 am]

Good morning, Warren. I hope you survived. Wanna get breakfast at 2 Whales? We're leaving at 9 Xomaxo

[Mad Max 10:02 am]

Rachel doesn't want her hash browns. Should I bring them back for you?

[Mad Max 10:21 am]

I brought you back the hash browns. Text me when you want me to bring them over.

His stomach rumbled. Hash browns sounded amazing and like something he'd actually be able to handle. He texted her back, apologizing for disappearing and asking if she could be over in 10 minutes. He was in desperate need of a shower; he reeked of alcohol and sex.

His breath hitched in his throat as he began to remember. The girl he'd been dancing with lead him to a couch where they continued their face sucking for some time. She excused herself to go to the bathroom and promised she'd be right back. He wondered if she intended to do so. Regardless, within minutes of her leaving he decided he needed some fresh air and exited out the backdoor, which is where he ran into a drunk and stoned Nathan Prescott.

It was still fuzzy, but he remembered still being very apprehensive of the other. He remembered finding it odd that the booze-pot combo seemed to really mellow Nathan out. He knew they talked, but he didn't remember about what. He remembered being pinned to the side of the building and being kissed and he remembered liking it very much, especially when one of Nathan's hands went down his pants. He vaguely remembered Victoria opening the backdoor and quickly going back inside when she realized what was going on. Nathan suggested they take things to his room, and Warren accepted.

And now that he was sober, he realized that he might have fucked up royally. He couldn't believe he'd been so stupid to sleep with Nathan fucking Prescott! His first time having sex with a guy was not supposed to go that way. It wasn't supposed to be with a guy who despised him. His only hope would be that Nathan would be too ashamed to bring up the incident to anyone and that Victoria would be a good friend and not tell a soul what she saw. He certainly knew he wasn't going to tell anybody, not even Max.

Speaking of which, she texted him back saying she'd be there when he asked and he hadn't even moved yet. He grabbed his shower caddy and left his room to head to the showers. He wasn't surprised to see that the hall was empty and very quiet. It normally was the day after parties, since most of the people on his floor were hungover. It was very strange to him to actually be one of those people.

When he got to the showers, he was surprised that someone was inside. Most weekends when he came to shower at that time, he'd be alone, and it was part of why he'd take early afternoon showers on Saturdays. It didn't really matter, as it didn't change anything as he didn't have the energy or the need to whack it in the shower. He quickly showered and changed into clean clothes that didn't smell like a bar.

His heart stopped as he saw who had been taking a shower a few stalls down. Of course it had to be Nathan, because everything had to be complicated because Warren was apparently far stupider than he ever thought he could be. He had to pretend like nothing happened, like nothing was weird, as he walked over to the sink to brush his teeth (because his breath smelt like death). He tried his best to keep his eyes forward, but couldn't help but steal glances at Nathan every once in a while.

It was unfathomable what had drawn the two together the night before, as he'd never even considered Nathan to be someone he'd potentially go after even in his wildest dreams. He could admit that if he knew nothing of Nathan's reputation he'd think he was cute, handsome even. If they'd met in difference circumstances, like if Warren had been affluent instead of only being able to attend Blackwell because he got a full scholarship or if at least he wasn't such an obvious nerd, they could have possibly been friends.

They weren't exactly enemies, not the past couple of weeks at least. The beginning of the previous month Max had a prime opportunity to be a complete asshole to Victoria, and when she didn't she got a second chance. When the duo realized that they somehow got along great, the entirety of the Vortex Club backed off some of Max's friends as well. They didn't go out of their way to be friendly to him, but being ignored was still an improvement.

Being ignored was exactly what he hoped would happen during his and Nathan's shared bathroom visit. If anything was going to revert them back to their original relationship, it sure would be this. Frankly, he just didn't have the energy to deal with that with his hangover and he didn't want to deal with it at all. It was rather nice to not be bullied by anyone for once in his life.

When the Gods smiled at Warren and Nathan left the bathroom without a word, the boy began to wonder if the other even remembered their night together. He was pretty sure Nathan had been more fucked up than he was, and even for him most of the night was fuzzy. The only reason he was sure something had happened was because he woke up completely naked and with a few love bites here and there, none of which on his neck luckily.

His face flushed at the strange thought of receiving such a thing from Nathan, especially with what he assumed had happened based on the location of a few of them. There was one on his shoulder, more of a literal bite than a love bite. Another few littered his chest. There was also one right above where his pubes begin, and then another on his very inner thigh. He felt it was a very safe assumption that Nathan had gone down on him, unless he was just a huge tease.

He wished he remembered the encounter. He regretted that it happened, wished it never had, and was certain it would be the end of his short-lived peaceful high school social life. Still, there was no denying it happened and there was nothing he could do about it so at the very least he wished he could remember what exactly they did. After all, it was his first sexual experience with a guy. It should have at least been somewhat special instead of a complete blackout mistake.

When he walked back to his room with still nothing eventful happening, he let out a sigh of relief. He was starting to believe that Nathan really didn't remember what had happened and was so grateful for that. That meant as long as Victoria didn't mention anything to Nathan about catching the two in a compromising position, he'd have nothing to really worry about.

Except it couldn't be that simple. No, of course it couldn't. As he sat on his bed to relax while he waited for Max to bring him those hash browns, he noticed a shirt on his bed that he hadn't left there. It technically shouldn't have even been in his room, as he'd left it somewhere in Nathan's. Which meant that his one-night stand had been in his room and had at least some inkling of what happened and with who. He mentally scolded himself for not wearing something else, something to blend in with the other kids at the party. No, he just had to wear his damned Schrödinger's Cat shirt.

His phone beeped, and he quickly grabbed it, assuming it was a text from Max saying she was on her way. It wasn't, though. It was from a number he didn't recognize but could easily deduce who it was by the nature of the message.

[Unknown Number 12:13 pm]

if u tlk yr ded

And just like that, it seemed like he was on Nathan Prescott's bad side. Which meant he was likely going to once again be on all the Vortex Club member's bad side. Fan-fucking-tastic. He laid back in his bed, the potential consequences of his actions flashing through his mind. Of course, he wasn't going to tell a soul; he'd never planned on it in the first place. He prayed that someone else hadn't somehow found out, that it was only them and Victoria that knew. She would never blab to anyone, not when it could potentially hurt her best friend.

That didn't mean that life as he knew it was going to end and go back to the shitty existence he had before. He could hope that Nathan would treat him the same as he'd been treating him in order to avoid suspicion, but it was doubtful. All because he made the stupid mistake of getting dragged to a Vortex Party. And staying, even though he'd been ditched almost immediately. He let out an aggravated sigh, wondering how he could be so smart and yet still so incredibly stupid.

"Vic, I fucked up."

Nathan was pacing around Victoria's room, the door shut and locked as he was on the verge of a meltdown. The hangover didn't help the complex emotions going through him. The fact that he already wasn't completely stable wasn't helpful, either. The only one he could turn to in his hour of need was Victoria and only Victoria. Not any other of his friends, nor his sister, or even his therapist could know what happened. After all, Victoria was the only one who knew he was gay.

He knew, logically, that at least some of the other people he knew wouldn't care. His sister, Rachel, Hayden, probably even Taylor and Courtney would give zero fucks about Nathan liking guys. Hell, it was likely that some of them had figured it out. Victoria had known long before he told her during one of his break downs; she had tried to pretend she was surprised, but he could easily see through it. It scared the crap out of him. No one could ever know it.

If word got out to his father… He didn't even want to think about what a nightmare his already shitty life would become. As a Prescott, the one that would be taking over the family businesses and money when the time came, it was important that he maintain a certain image. It was especially important to his father and he knew the last thing his father would like was a gay son, or a "fag" as he remembered being called as a child one time he made the mistake of saying another boy was cute.

He'd done fairly well up until that point of hiding his actual sexual orientation. He didn't date, but he made sure to make it look like he was attracted to girls. He made crude comments like the other boys and had a stash of Playboy's not all that well hidden in his room. When he was high or drunk or whatever and looking for a score, which was pretty much at every single party, he always made sure it was a woman. He'd never done anything with a guy before and he'd planned on staying that way for a long time.

But then everything got fucked up. He was tempted to slip at the party and he ran outside after murmuring to Victoria that he needed some air and that he needed to be alone. The cool November air would help; he was sure of it. And then Graham showed up. Of all the people in the world, of all the males, it just had to be him.

He loathed the fact that he had the hots for that nerd. There was something so mesmerizing about him, how he was who he wanted to be regardless of what other's thought, how much he cared about his friends even to the point where he would take a punch for them. It didn't help that Warren had gym right before Nathan did and he'd catch the other changing in the locker room. His light pudge was downright adorable and he had a surprising amount of arm and leg muscle for one so nerdy.

It was only going to be worse. Now that he knew what was hiding in Warren's boxers, what it felt like to be penetrated, the sounds Warren made while being pleasured… It made the wanting even worse. He didn't know how he was going to handle being inebriated in the privacy of his bedroom knowing Warren was down the hall. After all, if he enjoyed being with Warren while they were both wasted, how wonderful would it be if they were sober enough to really get into what they were doing? He could never allow himself to do those things.

Nathan sat down beside Victoria on her bed and laid his head on her shoulder. She responded by putting her arms around him and giving a gentle squeeze. In a small way, she felt guilty but she didn't know what she could have done the night before. She wasn't going out alone to check on Nathan, so it was all she could do to push her followers back inside before they saw what was going on. She told them he was messing around with some girl she didn't recognize, and that was enough to get the party goers to avoid that area. They knew better than to intervene when one of their pack leaders was trying to score.

When she finally managed to go back out without a posse going after her, Nathan and Warren were long gone and she knew it was too late. Even if they hadn't of had sex yet, there was no way she'd have been able to stop them. Not without informing whoever was in the boy's dorm at the time of what was happening. So, she kept her mouth shut and her phone on so he'd be able to reach her whenever he woke up the next day.

"What the fuck am I gonna do if people find out about this shit? My father will literally kill me if he hears about this…"

Victoria really wanted to punch Sean Prescott in the face. If it weren't for him, Nathan wouldn't be freaking out and sobbing in her arms at that moment. Actually, Nathan would likely be a lot more mentally stable overall, but that was beside the point. She doubted that Nathan would have been open to the world about his feelings, but he'd at least be out to their group. Plus, as strange as it felt admitting it, she liked the idea of Nathan and Warren being together. She didn't know much about the geeky boy, but she's heard enough about him to know that he'd never hurt her best friend.

"I don't think Graham would tell anyone about this." She wasn't lying to make him feel better; she was dead serious. If the fear of the gay label wasn't enough to deter him from telling people, she was certain he knew the Vortex Club would. "I could personally go and make sure he keeps his mouth shut."

Nathan actually cracked a smile, happy he had someone like her in his life. "I already texted him telling him not to say shit." He was quiet a moment before sighing as he placed his elbows on his thighs and cradled his head in his hands. "How can I be such a fucking dumbass?"

Victoria looked at him apologetically. "We didn't know Max was actually going to bring him. You couldn't have prepared for this."

"I'm the fucktard that actually started it…"

"You can't help who you like, Nate." She gently rubbed his back over his shirts. "It's shitty, but that's just how it is."

Unexpectedly, he sobbed again. "What the fuck is wrong with me? Why am I like this? Why can't I just want to fuck girls like every other guy?"

"Don't say that!" The concern was evident in her voice. She hated seeing him in his self-depreciating moods. "Being gay isn't a choice, Nathan. It doesn't make you a bad person. It's the people who tell you that are the ones that have something wrong with them."

"I can't fuck up like this again."

Victoria's heart went out to him. She loathed seeing what this did to him and wanted so badly for him to live in a world where he wasn't treated like shit by his parents and he would be allowed to be out and date just like every other high school kid.

"I have to stop using and drinking." He really didn't want to. Often times, being drunk or on some sort of drug was the only thing that made him feel good. It was so different from the drugs he'd been legally prescribed. Sometimes, they made him feel numb. Most of the time, though, he just completely and utterly resented the fact that he had to take them. In his mind, it was just another thing to prove that he was crazy.

If he was thinking clearly he'd know he was romanticizing the illegal drugs. Having sex with nerd boy wasn't the first mistake he'd made while under the influence of something. There'd been many times he took things to try to take the pain away, to give him the brief happiness he so desired, only for it to backfire in some God-awful way. Sometimes they would trigger an even worse meltdown than he'd have had without the drugs. A few times, they inspired hallucinations that would even give nightmares to the most fucked up horror movie directors. Still, none of them had the potential to damage him as much as being boned by another guy.

Victoria remained silent, wondering if Nathan was actually going to get sober this time. He'd said such things before after some particularly bad trips, but things would always go back to normal by the next party. This situation was in a whole other league of its own, though. Nothing made Nathan feel more shame than the fact that he was gay. Victoria knew that all too well, for some of his worst breakdowns had to do with that exact thing.

Finally, she looked at Nathan in the eyes and said, "If that's what you want to do, then I'll do whatever I can to help you."