Disclaimer: Don't sue; I don't own Sailor Moon… and frankly, I wouldn't want to.

Pluto's Birthday: A sailor Moon and Rocky Horror Picture Show adaptation.

And you may want to youtube the song "The Time Warp" to get the full effect of the fic.

And for purposes of this fic, let's all assume that Pluto's birthday wasn't already known to anyone… i.e., a secret…

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Setsuna was scowling at the calendar on the wall in front of her in her apartment to no avail. Even though her "extra curricular" occupation as the Senshi of Time kept her well aware of what date and time it was, this did not assuage her distaste for this day. Though thankfully the day was almost over rapidly darkening, and there had been no threats that needed her attention recently.

So with an absent shrug of the shoulders, she decided to do what most single adults did on this day… go out and get stoned drunk.

Just as she was grabbing her purse about to head out for a night of alcohol induced forgetfulness… her communicator inside the purse began to beep the annoyingly cute sound of an Emergency. Retrieving the offending device and flipping it open to see the screen, Setsuna just sighs in defeat as she whispers her transformation phrase and teleports into the Temple Courtyard.

Popping into existence within the Temple Courtyard Sailor Pluto is at first confused by the absence of the other Senshi… 'Wasn't this an emergency? Where are they then?!' Sailor Pluto thought to herself in annoyance.

Just then several spot lights around the court yard came to life bathing Sailor Pluto in white light in the otherwise darkening area. Then just as she's raising her Time Staff into a defensive posture ready to intercept the obvious surprise attack… all the other Senshi in their transformed states jump out from behind the temple, or shrubberies, or trees… and collectively shout "SURPRISE!" at a very shocked Sailor Pluto.

"Wh-what?" Pluto gasped out still startled.

To this Sailor Moon just beamed at Pluto and said "Mercury found out that it's your birthday, and everyone needs a party… so… surprise!"

To accentuate this point Sailor Mercury standing behind Moon, was holding up the Mercury Computer so Pluto could see a series of dates on flashing on the tiny screen.

'I don't know how or when… but I'm going to break that thing…" Pluto thought to herself darkly.

With her composure regained slightly, Pluto said to the assembled Sailor Senshi that was the Inners, The Outers, Chibi-Moon, and Tuxedo Mask, in a voice almost dripping with distaste "What now? Are you going to sing 'Happy Birthday' or something?"

To this Moon just backpedaled waving her hands saying "No no no!... Uh… some of us got together… and um… thought of something better! Yeah!"

With that Moon, Tuxedo Mask, Venus, Mercury, Mars, Jupiter, Uranus, Neptune began circling around Pluto, with Chibi-Moon and Saturn off to the side both looking confused. Wasn't this supposed to be a birthday party?

Then there was bell tolling three times, as a distinct Rock and Roll sound started from somewhere behind the temple, then Mask started to sing "It's astounding… Time is fleeting… Madness takes it's toll… But listen closely…" Sailor Mars then continues "Not for very much longer…" then back to Mask "I've got to… keep control!"

At this time the Sailor Senshi were really dancing a cirlce around a gaping mouth and dumbfounded Sailor Pluto, and off to the side Chibi-Moon with eyes wide slapped her hand over Sailor Saturn's eyes. And Sailor Saturn with wide equally wide eyes slapped her hand over Chibi-Moon's eyes

Then the Rock and Roll really picked up, as Sailor Moon got into it singing and kicking up her legs "I remember… doing the TIME WARP!... Drinking those moments when… the blackness would hit me…" at this Moon and Mars joined in harmony "…And the void would be calling…" then there was a pause… and all the Senshi in the ring around Pluto sung "Let's do the time warp again…" and repeated "LET'S DO THE TIME WARP AGAIN!..."

At this they paused, Sailor Mercury stepped forward holding up the Mercury Computer and said in a teachers voice "It's just a jump to the left…"

Then they all sung "IT'S JUST A JUMP TO THE RIGHT!"

Mercury stepped forward again holding the computer "Put your hands on your hips…"

They then sung happily "YOU BRING YOUR KNEES IN TIGHT!... BUT IT'S THE PELVIC THRUST THAT REALLY DRIVES YOU IN-SA-SA-SANE!... LET'S DO THE TIME WARP AGAIN… LET'S DO THE TIME WARP AGAIN!!!"

Neptune then stepped forward and circled within Pluto's personal space, and sung in a husky voice "It's so dreamy, oh fantasy free me! So you can't see me… No, not at all…" then Neptune counter circled Pluto and leaned in close and sung huskily "In another dimension… with Voyeuristic intention… well secluded… I see all…"

Mars then took her cue and sung solo "With a bit of a Mind-flip…"

Neptune then sung out almost orgasmicaly "You're into the time –SLIP-!"

Mars picked her solo up again, "And nothing can ever be the same…"

Uranus then cues in "Your spaced out on sensation!" with Mask followed her screaming "Like you're under sedation!..."

Off to the side Chibi-Moon and sailor Saturn had moved the others fingers covering their eyes, so each has one eye peeking at the display… and Pluto… well… had gone bye-bye… with her mouth hanging open.

Then all the Sailors and Mask circling Pluto sung once again waving their arms in the air "LET'S TO THE TIME WARP AGAIN!... LET'S DO THE TIME WARP AGAIN!"

Then Sailor Venus stepped forward and sung "…Well I was walking down the street just a-having a think…When a snake of a guy gave me an evil wink…He shook me up, he took me by surprise…He had a pickup truck and the devil's eyes!... He stared at me and I felt a change, Time meant nothing, never would again!" with that they again sung "LET'S DO THE TIME WARP AGAIN!... LET'S DO THE TIME WARP AGAIN!"

Off to the side of the temple out of site Grandfather Hino was smiling and tapping his right foot… after all it wasn't everyday seven Beautiful Sailor Suited Warriors of Love and Justice break into a song and chorus line in your backyard…

Mercury then jumped in saying "It's just a JUMP to the LEFT!"

"AND THEN YOU JUMP TO YOUR RIIIIIGHT!!!" they all sung in chorus.

Mercury put her hands on her hips and sung, "Put your hands on your hips!"

Then in harmony chorus…"YOU BRING YOUR KNEES IN TIGHT!... BUT IT'S THE PELVIC THRUST THAT REALLY DRIVES YOU IN-SA-SA-SANE!... LET'S DO THE TIME WARP AGAIN… LET'S DO THE TIME WARP AGAIN!!!"

Then Sailor Venus surprisingly broke out of the chorus line and started tap dancing around Pluto… even more surprising was that she was on gravely soil and still sounded like tap…

"LET'S DO THE TIME WARP AGAIN!..."

"LET'S DO THE TIME WARP AGAIN!..."

Mercury then jumped in saying "It's just a JUMP to the LEFT!"

"AND THEN YOU JUMP TO YOUR RIIIIIGHT!!!" they all sung in an even higher pitched fast chorus.

Mercury put her hands on her hips and sung fast, "Put Your Hands On Your Hips!"

Then in high pitched harmony chorus…"YOU BRING YOUR KNEES IN TIGHT!... BUT IT'S THE PELVIC THRUST THAT REALLY DRIVES YOU IN-SA-SA-SANE!..."

They accentuated this by actually pelvic thrusting in Pluto's direction… interestingly enough that does interesting things to fuku clad girls… and Pluto had a single drop of blood escape her nose…

"…LET'S DO THE TIME WARP AGAIN… LET'S DO THE TIME WARP AGAIN… LET'S DO THE TIME WARP AGAIN!!!"

With that the rock music stopped abruptly and all seven fell down around Sailor Pluto in a human ring, panting hard… moments later Pluto stiffly fell over face-up with the time key held so tightly her knuckles were turning white… she was shell-shocked.

Minutes pass, before the incredible dancing Senshi collected themselves off of the ground, brushing off the dirt from their fuku's. Then as if coming out of a stupor, Chibi-Moon rushed over to Pluto and says "Puu? Puu are you okay?" Getting no response other than the occasional face-tick, or eye-twitch, Chibi-Moon pokes Pluto on the breast… nothing.

Turning to face the troupe of giggling Sailor Senshi and one chuckling Tuxedo Mask at how they really got Pluto one good. Chibi-Moon says pointing at the still prone form of Pluto. "Um… guys… I… um… think you… um broke her…"

With that, one by one, each Sailor looked at the green haired Senshi laying unblinking on the ground, and gulped… not for Pluto's current condition… but for when she comes to… they realized… they were SOOO dead….

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END…

Oneshot, review if it pleases you. Boy though, it's twisted isn't it?

I had the idea after watching 'The Time Warp' on youtube… and couldn't resist.

Thanks.