A/N: Well this is my first fan fic and in all actuality my first writing i have ever put up for public review/view. Please tell me what you think and i guess depending on how well its received will determine how quickly i come out with a second part. This is meant to be a series and a pretty lengthy one i think lol. Its gonna be mostly action based with heavy emphasis on these two characters obviously /. I guess ill give more notes on the next one, till then enjoy and let me know what you think.
The Usual Disclaimers apply: i dont own the characters or the world blah blah dont sue me and all that
Abandonment
God damn it Shizuru, thought Natsuki has she sped down the wet rode going a great deal faster than she knew she should. It was midnight and pouring as the biker tore through the streets seemingly oblivious to the dangers she faced in going so fast in the foul weather.
Why the hell did she go without telling me? I thought we were friends damn it. You're not going to get away that easy, thought Natsuki as she came upon an intersection. The light suddenly turned red and she slammed on the breaks knowing she would end up in the middle of the intersection even if she did come to a stop. There was a semi-truck crossing the intersection and she knew shed be dead if she hit it so at the last second she turned her bike on its side using the momentum to carry her and it forward. She skidded right underneath the giant trailer narrowly missing the rear tires. She smiled knowing she had just barely lived until the bike tilted up and sent her flying.
She landed about ten feet away from the bike with a hard crunch on the ground and kept bouncing until she hit a curb. She gasped as all the air was painfully ripped from her lungs. Her vision blurred as she remembered how she ended up here.
It was a month after the Carnival and Natsuki couldn't be happier. She had gone through some pretty drastic changes in the past month, she was actually showing up to school, she did her homework, and for the first time in her life she had friends. It was an odd development, one that she herself didn't fully understand but she found herself comfortable around other people for the first time in her life.
She would eat lunch with Mai and Mikoto just about every day, laughing at Mikoto's animalistic and childlike antics. She would even go with them on their frequent visits to karaoke in which Mai dragged the entire Ranger squad along with them. The first time Natsuki laughed at one something Nao said, without immediately being followed by an insult there was dead silence in the room. This of course brought on the insult but the fact that it wasn't there to begin with was something of a precedent.
By far the biggest change was her relationship with Shizuru. They spent almost every day together. When Shizuru was taking care of her president activities, Natsuki was usually quietly sitting in the corner working on her homework. After school they would usually head to Shizuru's dorm so she could help Natsuki with her homework. Afterwards they would usually get something to eat spending most of the evening together talking, laughing, and just plain enjoying each others company.
Her change had not gone unnoticed. One day while they were eating lunch and Mikoto had just run headfirst into a tree causing Natsuki to burst out laughing Mai smiled and said, "You've changed Natsuki."
This cut off Natsuki's laughter who then turned to Mai with narrowed eyes and asked, "What do you mean?"
"Before a few weeks ago I had never really heard you laugh. You never ate lunch with us or actually volunteered yourself to go to karaoke with us. You don't even fight with Nao like you used to. You seem like a much happier person," Mai smiled as her friend blushed slightly.
"I don't think I've changed that much…" Natsuki began looking at her sandwich in her hands. "But, I do think I am happier." Thinking of Shizuru she smiled. She then remembered something suddenly.
Quickly putting her things away she stood up and said, "Sorry I just remember something." Before Mai could say another word she went sprinting towards the student council room. She couldn't believe she almost forgot about tomorrow. She reached the student council room and knocked on the door. She stopped for a minute, that's never something she would have done before; her usual habit was to just walk in like she belonged there. She ground her teeth at this, maybe Mai was right, maybe she had changed.
There was a brief silence and then came a response in the soft Kyoto-ben voice she had come to enjoy hearing, "Come in."
Natsuki opened the door and stepped in. There behind the desk as always was Shizuru sipping her tea, while reading some papers on her desk. Natsuki smiled then blushed at how she suddenly felt slightly giddy that Shizuru was there. Why did she feel that way? Shizuru was always there, and when she wasn't she would always come if Natsuki waited.
She was pulled from her thoughts when the Kyoto woman said, "Ara, is just seeing me enough to make Natsuki blush? I guess I shouldn't teas you too much today or you might feint." Natsuki clenched her fists and buried her head in her shoulders; her face turning even redder if that was possible. Shizuru just laughed quietly behind her hand.
Not wanting to call further attention to her embarrassment Natsuki quickly turned around. "Shut up, I just wanted to ask you something."
"Oh," said Shizuru standing, "and what does my Natsuki want of me." She giggled slightly at how Natsuki's shoulders tensed more and could only imagine how red the younger girl was now.
"Um…." Began Natsuki not really sure how to proceed. She turned around rubbing the back of her head looking at the ground, "I was uh, wondering if maybe uh, you would want to hang out some tomorrow? Maybe, I dunno a dinner or a movie or something like that."
If she hadn't been looking at the ground she would have seen the sad smile flash across Shizuru's face before it was quickly banished. "Ara, is Natsuki asking me out on a date?"
Natsuki's shoulders tensed again and her face was a bright red, "It's not a date! I was just wondering if you would want to do something."
It was then that she finally saw it. That sad smile. It was only there for a second, so short that she couldn't be sure if it was actually there or not but she knew. She knew because she had seen so many in the past month. Usually it was there when they were together and Shizuru thought Natsuki wasn't looking. It tore at her, and yet she didn't know what she could do about it. It was filled with so much pain and sadness that it pulled at her in ways she didn't understand. She knew she would have to find out why sooner or later but she had been trying to ignore them.
Shizuru's voice was low when she said, "Ara, don't be mad. Of course I would like to go with you tomorrow." She then smiled one of her genuine smiles. One of her smiles she reserved for Natsuki and Natsuki alone.
Natsuki blushed and looked at the ground again, "So uh, I'll meet you at the usual spot then?" She was fidgeting. Why the hell was she fidgeting? It wasn't like she hadn't asked Shizuru if she had wanted to do something before.
"Of course," smiled Shizuru.
"Well then, I'll see you after school, I'm gonna need help on some math, I got a big test tomorrow." And before Shizuru could say anything she had run out the door.
Shizuru sighed and shut the door. That Natsuki, how she could make her heart soar one moment and then tear at it the next all without knowing. She sat back down, taking a long drink from her tea, enjoying the burning sensation that helped her for get about her non physical pain. "This is for the best right?" she asked to no one in general. It's best for her, for me. She has friends now, and she is doing well in school, and she was so much happier now. In no time at all she would forget about her. This thought hurt her even more than anything else.
She opened the drawer of the desk and lifted out a few books. There, at the bottom of the drawer, safely pressed between two pieces of paper was the flower. The one that so long ago she had stopped Natsuki from crushing. She had watched it grow, enjoyed its beauty, and when the winter came to claim it, she plucked it for herself.
She sighed, knowing how hypocritical and selfish she was but she couldn't stand to see something that held a connection with her and Natsuki die a slow, withering death. It was then that she felt the tears streaming down her face. "Natsuki…" She put the flower in her laptop, closed it and stood. Wiping away the tears, she looked around the room for the last time, trying to burn in the images of all the times Natsuki and her had spent there into her memory for ever, then left, closing the door behind her.