My Immortal, a death note fanfic

Song: My Immortal by Evanescence

Anime: Death Note

Pairing: LXLight

Disclaimers: I do not own the song nor the anime. If I did own the anime, then it would be a MA-rated film with L and Light uh…… you get the idea……. I don't own the song either. If I did, then I would be able to sing soprano, not tenor. Got it?

Lyrics- Italics

Story- Print

I'm so tired of being here
Suppressed by all of my childish fears
And if you have to leave
I wish that you would just leave
Because your presence still lingers here
And it won't leave me alone

Light looked down at a picture he had of Ryuuzaki. He knew that it was for Ryuuzaki's own good that he was dead, but somewhere, deep inside Light's heart, he regretted killing the detective. Never had Light had such a close friend, never before had Light been so happy being with someone. At first, they started out friends, but then Light's feelings started to develop into so much more. Light knew that if he lingered onto the past any longer, he would be caught as Kira, but he just… couldn't move on. Losing a loved one had that much of an impact on him. Kira was unsettled. And regretful.

These wounds won't seem to heal
This pain is just too real
There's just too much that time cannot erase

A single tear. That was all Light had shown at Ryuuzaki's funeral, and that surprised many of his friends. However, they did not know what truly went on in Light's head. Every night, before he would sleep, Light's sobs could be heard echoing throughout his house. His parents and sister were worried, but Light refused to see a physiatrist. He claimed that "they would never understand his feelings." Even now, after so long…. His pillows would be tear-stained in the morning and his eyes would be constantly red and puffy.

When you cried I'd wipe away all of your tears
When you'd scream I'd fight away all of your fears
And I've held your hand through all of these years
But you still have all of me

Light bowed his head as he placed a bouquet of roses on Ryuuzaki's grave. "Ryuuzaki…. do you remember when you came to me crying because Matsuda had knocked all your sweets off the table?" He whispered. Light could still remember that day with so much clarity. Ryuuzaki had buried his head on Light's shoulder and Light could still remember wrapping his arms around the detective and hugging him. Then, Light had wiped Ryuuzaki's tears away and went out with him to buy a strawberry shortcake from a nearby bakery. When Ryuuzaki was eating it, a small bit of icing remained on the side of his mouth. That was their first kiss.

You used to captivate me
By your resonating light
But now I'm bound by the life you left behind
Your face it haunts my once pleasant dreams
Your voice it chased away all the sanity in me

"Light-kun? Light-kun!" Light shook his head as he was startled out of his reverie.

"I'm sorry, Ryuuzaki-kun, did you say something?" Light asked. He had been so captivated by Ryuuzaki's voice that he wasn't paying any attention to the actual words coming out of the raven head's mouth. Ryuuzaki sighed.

"What's wrong, Light? You usually aren't like this?" Ryuuzaki wrapped his thin arms around Light's neck.

"It's nothing, Ryuuzaki." Light murmured, after pressing his lips briefly on Ryuuzaki's.

"Damn!" Light threw the Death Note across the room. If he hadn't gone and killed Ryuuzaki, they could be happy together now. Light could have given up possession of the notebook, and he could be living with Ryuuzaki now. Light sat up in bed, panting. It was 3 o'clock in the morning and the light of the sun was beginning to penetrate the dark sky. Light laid back in bed, knowing that he wouldn't be able to fall asleep. "Another one of those nightmares…" Light whispered to himself, burying his head into his pillow. Every night, the dream of Ryuuzaki's death would haunt Light. Everywhere Light went, he could hear Ryuuzaki's voice. It was maddening.

These wounds won't seem to heal
This pain is just too real
There's just too much that time cannot erase

Light brought the cold blade to his wrist. The physical pain made Light forget about the mental and emotional pain. This was the only method in relieving himself that did not include committing suicide. No. Light would not take his own life. He knew that he could never be with Ryuuzaki again. Just that thought made Light want to die. But he couldn't…. wouldn't… take his life. Even in death, they could never be together.

When you cried I'd wipe away all of your tears
When you'd scream I'd fight away all of your fears
And I've held your hand through all of these years
But you still have all of me

Light pressed his lips to Ryuuzaki's neck. When he came back up, he noticed tears in Ryuuzaki's eyes. "What's the matter, love?" Light asked.

"Will this hurt?" Ryuuzaki whimpered. Light licked the tears away.

"I'll lessen the pain as much as possible." Light whispered, before kissing his boyfriend deeply. That was the night where they lost both their virginities to each other.

I've tried so hard to tell myself that you're gone
And though you're still with me
I've been alone all alone

As Light lay there on the wooden stairs, he still heard Ryuuzaki's voice whispering into his ear. "Soon, we'll meet again, Light." Light shook his head.

"No, Ryuuzaki. Never. I cannot go to heaven or hell. They are both forbidden to me. I'm sorry." With those words, Light Yagami took his last breath, alone, and died.

When you cried I'd wipe away all of your tears
When you'd scream I'd fight away all of your fears
And I've held your hand through all of these years
But you still have all of me

The Yagami family stood over Light's grave. "Light… Ryuuzaki…" They left violets on each of the graves, and left after saying goodbye to Light. They were moving, and this would be the last time they would ever see anything to do with Light.

Two months later, a lone boy with white hair and white pajamas on would visit the graves of Light and Ryuuzaki and he would notice a red bush growing out from the soil. The branches were entwined with each other and the leaves were all pointing upwards toward heaven. "Light…. Ryuuzaki… the red fern…." The pajama-clad boy's eyes would grow wide as he looked upon the plant that was said to only be able to be planted by an angel. "I see you two are happy together in heaven…"

Kinda corny, I know, but please... reviews??