Springtime Is For Suckers

Summary: The NCIS team investigates serial killings of government agents, including their own. Also, McGee goes on a blind date. Okay, so they aren't all they're cracked up to be… but if you've got enough drive and a little bit of a stalker side, something good can come of them. Action/adventure romantic dramedy; a little something for everyone, you know?

Chapter One: McGee Laments On His Sad State

Urgh. Springtime.

That was all Special Agent Timothy McGee could think as he sat at his desk at NCIS headquarters, watching other people's lives unfold around him. Springtime, in his opinion, was like Valentine's Day, except stretched into a whole season, instead of one day a year. Everybody was getting together, and asking new people out on dates, and "going exclusive". It was Singles Awareness Season.

And Timothy McGee was painfully single. Everyone that he knew, all his friends and associates at work, were becoming involved in relationships, or taking their already-existing relationship forward, it seemed.

Tony DiNozzo had moved in with his girlfriend of six months, which, to Tony, was a very big step in and of itself. In past relationships, he would have been incapable of calling a girl back past the fourth date.

Abby Scuito was getting pretty serious with the guy she had met a few months back at a convention. Apparently, he was very much into forensics and bowling. A winning combination for Abby. And a painful reminder for McGee, who had once been involved with Abby, but no longer had any chance. The two had an on again, off again thing, but it seemed very "on" lately.

Apparently, even ex-Mossad officer Ziva David was letting her guard down enough to start playing the field. No one quite knew whom she was dating, how she had met him, or what they did or said dates, but she had made no secret of the fact that she was taking offers. McGee had even considered asking her, until he remembered the time they had become trapped under a car dashboard. There was no chemistry in that relationship.

Even his team leader, Gibbs, was dating. And it was obvious that he was at least enjoying himself, which was a nice change of pace. Although it didn't really change the work environment very much.

Even Palmer was getting some.

But McGee had no one. He hadn't had a date in almost a month, which was beginning to become quite an oddity for him. It wasn't that he couldn't get the dates.

But he had realized that he had starting to try to go after the wrong type of woman. At first, he hadn't known what kind of girl he'd wanted. He figured he'd be lucky if any girl dated him. But after working with Tony for a while, he started to come out of his shell, and realized that his shy-guy computer geek act wasn't attracting the ladies.

Then he went in the opposite direction, flirting with girls in Armani. He was dating the hot girls, the cheerleaders, the ones who liked couture clothing and guys who drove nice cars. But he realized something about them: they only liked him for the things he had.

So now he faced a nice little dilemma: find a girl who was down-to-earth and not concerned with material things, but also one who isn't geeky, in the crazy sort of way. Among other, more specific, requirements.

Which, he was finding, was hard in a world of stereotypes. People were so used to being pigeon-holed that they went along with it, either going one way or the other. He was living in a world of extreme opposites, where you couldn't be attractive and successful and be a computer nerd.

You had to be one or the other.

Wanted: pretty, bookish girl seeking successful attractive computer geek.

-x-x-

Abby had noticed McGee's down-and-out behavior, and quickly surmised the problem: McGee had hit a dating slump, and she had to pull him out of it. So she did it the only way she knew how, by sending him on a date with her cousin.

Mary seemed like his type… sort of. By day she was a quiet, unassuming librarian; by night, a roller derby girl. Unfortunately, that was the problem with Mary: her tough, aggressive roller derby persona only came out when she was at the roller derby. Which meant, to everyone else, she was actually kind of boring.

McGee didn't need to know this, though. In fact, it would probably be better if he didn't. After all, there should be some level of mystery left during a blind date. It could sometimes turn people away to learn about someone through someone else.

So, one day, Abby Sciuto sent Timothy McGee off to Panera, a lunch date, and the inconspicuous Mary. Of course, as Abby indubitably forgot, things never go exactly as you plan them.

So, what do you guys think? I've had this in the works for a while, and figured I'd squeeze it in before it officially became "not spring." You know, so it's appropriate and all. If I get good reviews, I should be able to update early and often. ; )