If.
Disclaimer: I do not make any money out of this story, nor does Galactik Football belong to me.
Follow up of: 'Stay (Far Away, So Close),' and 'One desire she'd never regret having'.
Nights of this sort had become dearly longed for; Mei and Tia always looked forward to spending an evening just the two of them out in an Akillian bar or lounge every now and then. They talked about anything: their lives, boyfriends, friends, events, memories, future plans, and a million other things. But they had made a pact: to talk about anything except football. They reserved these nights only to be friends, not teammates. Of course they did not disregard the fact that they were footballers playing in the same team, having close friends, boyfriends, ex-boyfriends, and a family amongst the team; but they longed for such disconnection from the competitiveness and pressure of the sport. These outings were the nights they were just normal girl friends. They were at one of their favourite bars which had a great atmosphere, and the food was even better.
Tia commented on a handsome young man sitting at a table across their booth, giggling as she still wanted to set up Mei with someone.
"Well… He is handsome." Mei said.
"But … ?" Tia noticed Mei's unconvincing reply.
"Well, I'm not ready yet for another relationship," she responded. And rightly so.
"It's alright, it's just a thing through time after all." Tia said supportively.
"Yes, it's just not that simple anymore … " Mei's words fell upon Tia with their intended understanding: Aarch. It had been already two months since she and Aarch had ended their affair.
"Yes, I understand." Tia said with a sigh. "You know, I still can't believe you were … you know, like that with him … " Tia said, uneasily waiting for a reply, sensing the tension which her words were able to strike. They both spoke quietly, even though they had a reserved private booth away from any paparazzi or nosy fans.
Mei paused for a moment; she had not talked about it since she had confided with Tia about her last conversation of the sort with Aarch two months earlier. She had been coping well about it though, so Tia's words were received with the good nature they were intended in.
"I can't imagine being in that way with our coach …" Tia only brought it up as a way of closure, intended in a humorous light - as such nights proved to offer. Mei happily continued the notion.
"You know, he used to give the bes-"
"WHOA! Whoa, stop right there!"
"… massages …" Mei said with an impish smirk.
"Riiiight…. I thought you were going to mention something which I would not wish to hear nor imagine," Tia said relieved.
"… well, he was good at other stuff as well." Mei enjoyed teasing of this sort.
"Nooo! No, shut up."
"Actually, he was even better at the other stuff!" Mei said excitedly.
"Mei! Ahh please stop it." Tia said covering her ears and closing her eyes.
They laughed hysterically, despite the fact that Tia was more than disgusted at the thought.
The next morning
Mei woke up to find noone in their room as Tia had already gone out with Rocket, making the most of their day off. Being left alone made her think. She thought about the great night they had; how much they laughed, how they talked of future vacations, and then of the funny little tease they shared. She was glad she had told Tia about it. Such a conversation offered a little closure. She then started to miss all the times they spent together - not only the fun part of the night (or mornings … or afternoons), but the little things. Like how she missed seeing him in his comfy plaid sweatpants pyjama; noone got to see him like that, but she had that privilege.
Telling Tia about it was good, otherwise that "catharsis" of emotion she had whenever she spoke of him could not be present. She then came to wondering; what if not only Tia knew. This was a thought she tried to stay away from when they were involved. But now she could process it without the fear of it actually happening.
She disregarded the media because they were capable of airing hours of lies about their affair, let alone justify a scandal. But instead she thought of the people close to her, which was worse.
Tia was the only person who knew about them, and Mei somehow knew she was going to react the way she did - more or less. She knew Tia was a good enough friend to come around and support her no matter what.
She thought of the people who would be hurt the most upon such news. She imagined what disappointment it would have brought to her parents. Especially her father, who she always shared a better bond with than her oppressive mother. Though he was too quiet and shy to ever confront her harshly about it. And he was certainly not going to succeed in giving Aarch a piece of his mind. She would be ashamed to be in front of her parents. Her mother on the other hand would probably be mad only at the fact that she was involved with Aarch solely based on her true feelings; she would have exhausted her with questions as to what was the reason of bribery behind such an affair. She could hear her in her head, "Mei, dear, if you were not going to get anything from him - a promotion, higher wages, or more recognition - why were you involved?!" And she would only be disappointed for that; because her daughter did not use her beauty to receive an advantage of some sort.
Venturing on to more drama, she thought about D'Jok. He would never forgive her, even though things between them had ended for good, he still had that little something about her in him. Not to mention the fact that he always considered Aarch as one of his heroes - he always saw him in a deified way (after Warren, of course), so he never felt jealous of him as Aarch was always above him. But now, getting involved with his ex-girlfriend made Aarch on the same level as him to an extent. Now he would really start to hate him. He never felt threatened by Aarch's success, because he was his superior, but this was something that they were both in the same game in, and Aarch had taken his place, as had Sinedd, his rival. D'Jok had found someone else to put on that list, now. D'Jok would probably not have seen Mei and Aarch's affair as a means of preferential treatment to her; she did not need it - she was happy in her position and had enough income to cater for her expensive taste. She did not need to be above the others in Aarch's eyes, there was no reason for that (Aarch never allowed it anyway, not even to his own nephew). And Aarch was not the type to have forced her into it. D'Jok would have been aware of such, which only would have caused him even more shock, as the only reason left in his mind was the most simple one, and the worst one: that she did actually like him.
She tried to take her mind off the subject by fidgeting with stuff around her room, making a vague attempt of cleaning up. However, thoughts kept haunting her, and the thought of another person she would have wanted to know last crept up: Sinedd. Although he was not around as much as the others, he was still Mei's ex. And indeed it was so, as Sinedd was her previous partner before Aarch - that had to say alot. He would be angry, of course. But she knew him well; in his cunning way he would find a way to enclose such anger with a defense mechanism he knew best: mockery. He would laugh at her for being involved with a middle-aged guy who was almost old enough to be her father. He would ridicule her for choosing Aarch when she could have had him. He would make sure she - and all of the galaxy - would get to know how low she had brought her standards to. But deep down all his body, heart and mind were filled with anger. He was angry at the first girl he dared to care about, for trading him to get involved with the man that had made him who he was, who gave him his first opportunity in professional football. As his thoughts haunted him more, his anger turned into jealousy, and with jealousy came sadness. Of course he would not let such a thing be visible to others.
She was thinking too dark when it came to Sinedd, but it would have been the case. She was just realising how many people would have gotten hurt if all this had come out (or could come out). She continued to put away some clothes strewn onto a chair from the day before, but it was futile. These thoughts were long in her head throughout her and Aarch's affair (and they were most certainly on Aarch's mind as well).
She thought of Rocket. Perhaps he would be crushed the most. He was in a tense position as Aarch was his uncle and coach, while Mei was his teammate and his girlfriend's best friend. Not only was Aarch his all time hero, but he always considered him as his role-model. But this? What was this supposed to say about his uncle, about the man he hoped to be when he grew older? That he was a middle aged man who has an affair with a girl as old as his nephew? To him it was as if it could have been Tia instead of Mei. And he could not live with that thought in his mind. However, Rocket was rather timid, and after a good talk with Aarch he would probably come around and feel sorry for him, or even support him. He was not going to forget all the good that he had done for him, for this one thing he did wrong. Rocket had even ignored that Aarch abandoned his own brother, his father after the terrible incident of the flux explosion. Somehow or another he would have come around to this. After all, they were not sleeping together just for the heck of it, and after Aarch would have enough courage to explain the situation to him, Rocket would understand and support him. But he would probably never forgive Mei, albeit not showing it. Certainly Tia would be a huge support to him if such a case were to happen, she had gone through it with Mei in a way, and came around to supporting her even if she did not fully understand why or how Mei could have possibly been involved with their coach.
Thinking of Rocket, she started to think of the rest of their team, as this would have certainly been a major shock to them. She thought of the possibility of Aarch having to resign. Although there were no official policies regarding romantic relationships between players and coach, their team was different; they did not view Aarch as their friend, but rather as a father figure, particularly considering the age gap between the Snow Kids and him. If such a case were to happen in other teams (which it certainly did), it would not have been viewed as too much of a scandal, as the players and coach were roughly the same age.
She thought of Micro-Ice, how he would loose even more self-confidence. Although his hopes to woo Mei were long shattered, now he came to clarify how he could have never succeeded. But he would not make too much of a big deal about it, though he would need to be there for D'Jok, and maybe lose a joke or two. She thought of Ahito, Thran and Yuki, who were not the type to pry into the life of others, but would nevertheless be shocked upon hearing such news. But who wouldn't? Yuki would perhaps be a bit jealous, as she was the only other female teammate apart from Tia, and she could not understand how Mei could have arrived to such things. She also had a slight secret crush on their coach. But spending so much time listening to, watching, learning from, and living with the same person, a slight fancy is perhaps inevitable. Thran would be shocked at first, of course he did not approve, but he was not in the situation, so he simply did not think his own opinion mattered. Yet he was also the caring type, and he was open to support both his teammate and his coach; he did not want to pick a side, and if the media would go too far in the matter (which they obviously would), he would be ready to support Aarch and Mei - however hard it may be.
Ahito would just continue to sleep.
Then there was the more dramatic Snow Kid, Mark. He would be aghast. It raged him. It also gave him the hope that anything was possible; that his relationship with Nina could work. He set his goals to be with her, have a proper relationship with her. If Mei and Aarch could get together, then nothing is impossible. However he was quite judging; he would probably think of Mei as a slut, and Aarch as a highly irresponsible man who should know better. He was too consumed of himself to respect that what had been going on between Aarch and Mei was not just plain fooling around. It was rather mature of them ending it the way it did, but he would not see that. He would just see a really beautiful young girl who somehow chose to have an affair with their coach, who was an irresponsible supposedly-mature man with low morals and ethics going through some mid-life crisis who needed a younger girl to prove himself better.
However, she was only thinking about the people who were close to her, ignoring those who were close to Aarch. Perhaps this would have been all the more complicated. To her teammates, she was involved with the coach; but to Aarch's friends, he was sleeping with a player who could be his daughter in age. Mei could get away with it because she was young and had the privilege to be foolish. But Aarch was in his forties, one would expect a man that age to perhaps have a hint of maturity within him.
She thought of the team's technical staff, who were close to him but still involved in her life. She always noticed Simbai had carried this secret affection towards him since their original encounter on the Wamba Planet. He was the most eligible man she encountered on a daily basis, thus such was inevitable - and they shared some history so it all adds up. She would have probably picked a side, of course that would be Aarch's; she was too infatuated by him that she would probably blame it all on Mei and still support him. She would not be too wrong if given the case. Clamp was always a kind of sidekick to Aarch, but perhaps not always connecting on a personal level with him, mainly only business. He would not care much for Mei's part in the involvement, however he would find a way to support Aarch.
However, when she started to think about the people closer to Aarch, who mattered more to him, things started to get even more serious.
She again fluttered around her room in an attempt to find something to take her mind off such a subject, but the thoughts kept visiting her mind, and daunting they indeed were.
She thought of Norata. He would be devastated. He would not talk to Aarch ever again (again). But this time it would be certain. Just as he thought that Aarch was getting back on track and becoming slightly the mature older brother he had always wished for, he goes and destroys it all by sleeping with a girl as old as his own nephew. Sometimes he would wonder how they were raised by the same parents and values and were so different than each other. This would have been a tough one to handle. Norata's recovered feelings towards Aarch would be once again cradled in disappointment, assuring him that his brother will never learn.
Keira on the other hand would be more supportive towards Aarch. Mei did not really know her too well, but she always occupied a certain warmth within her, and that reflected on her and Aarch's relationship, particularly in sharing a past and family they had abandoned and returned to to make amends.
Mei further thought of the only plausible person who Aarch really cared for, aside of himself. And that was Adium,
As if Aarch had to do yet another thing to convince her that they should not be together. Mei was also not very close to her; the instability of her and Aarch's relationship only allowed for rare occasions where she had the chance to socialise with the Snow Kids. However Mei sensed her character too well, both being on a somewhat similarity in their empowered femininity.
Despite doing her best to not show it to Aarch, Adium always had that little voice inside her that kept telling her that he would perhaps change and that she could justify herself for attempting to give him another chance. That voice now would be forever silenced. Most likely she would be more angry than sad. But she was a strong enough woman not to show it. She would just ignore Aarch, causing him to be even more upset that he ruined anything that could ever happen between them (a selfish thought that had crossed his mind many times when he was involved with Mei). She would choose not to show him hatred - as it takes rather a sense of caring to hate someone - but instead she would show him apathy, because that would be a harder stab. Underneath all this however, she would be definitely sad; even though she could not have ever admitted it to anyone, most particularly to Aarch, she was always consciously waiting to witness one profound moment which showed her that he had matured, and was no longer the immature careless idiot who left her to go play football in another planet. She was waiting for that moment and when it would come, she knew he would want to get back together - he still did - she knew he was the only one who she could make a life with. But now she was certain that such a moment could never arrive. This was Aarch - the selfish, rash, ego-centric immature idiot he always was.
Mei tried not to think about him, but he was the first person she thought of. This would have been just too serious a thing if he had got to know. If there was one person who she had always seen the clearest and most affectionate love carried towards Aarch, it was in Artegor. Despite the successful masking of his inner emotions and any possible care towards other people or issues (his sunglasses not helping much either), one thing was sure and even he could not conceal it successfully. Any person who observed him, even if from a distance, realised his affection towards Aarch. Perhaps it would be him who would take Aarch and Mei's affair the worst. He always loved him, and he could never succeed in having him fully. He would be disappointed for sure, but perhaps more hurt than angry. He would take it personally - even though it was nothing of the sort. But to him Aarch was everything. Anything that Aarch did, Artegor would feel something somehow. But that was the way he loved him. This would probably ruin their friendship forever, but he would still have that distanced love towards him. Aarch would never know it and he would not dare try to find out.
She could not take away the fact that he was also her coach, which again made him an in-between. He would have used his authority to assert his disapproval towards her, and probably would have never forgiven her. Perhaps if everyone had found out, her reason for having to resign from the team would have been most likely Artegor, and noone else.
Artegor: it was the name she tried not to think of. But throughout their relationship the thought of him finding out about them haunted them both. Not that he would spread the news to others - he was the last person to engage in gossip - but because he would have been hurt the most. More than Adium and Norata, or the Snow Kids, or her parents. It was not that Mei cared much towards him, he was simply her stubborn and very strict assistant coach, but she knew how much he cared for Aarch, and that was one thing she felt guilty about in all the thoughts that had crossed her mind regarding her involvement with Aarch.
The thought of Artegor made her realise just how grateful she was that such an affair remained secret. It brought her back to reality. Her mind was clear of these thoughts, it was a process that she needed to undergo to fall back into reality, and to fully recognise the gravity of their involvement.
She stood still in her room for a moment. Gave a sigh of silent relief and hoped not to think about it ever again. She finally convinced herself that all of it was a mistake. That she should have never started it. It was a thing she would have to live with, and knew her position in the team and with him was never going to be the same. She could live with it.
She left the room a different person.
Author's notes: This had been lying in my computer for quite a while, and finally decided to finish it.
Hope you liked it. :) Not much going on but I always wondered how it would have been like if the other characters found out about Mei and Aarch's involvement.
Thanks for reading! :)
