Disclaimer: I do not own Being Human
A/S: Hey guys. I know its been a while but university and life in general has been a bit hectic. Anyway I've decided that I'm going to tell the stories which I wanted to in one-shots. This will be the first of many and I hope you enjoy it.
The Right Thing
For Shriana
Wales, 2011
She always came out of nowhere. Every single time he met her over and over again it was like she materialized from thin air. It was like she was a part of nature. Tom didn't notice her at first. McNair was glad of that. For a moment he was hoping that she was a figment of his imagination, despite the fact that he spent nights, days thinking about her restlessly. He closed his eyes wishing her away even though this thought made him feel so much pain in his heart, if he still had a heart. There was a part of him that wished that they could have been together, share this curse together. It might have made it easier but she didn't see things that way, because of this he felt like he couldn't forgive her. Yet he loved her too much to hate her for that either.
He finally opened his eyes again and there she was. Waiting for him, like he had done for so many years. It had been years since he saw her last. She was so beautiful when he first met her and she still was. She had aged yet at the same time she hadn't changed at all. She still had that light in her which he loved so much. It was his shelter. It was the reason why he was still able to hold onto his life.
"Aoife."
The forty-odd year old woman smiled. That smile always took his breath away. It literally sucked the life out of him every single time he was blessed with that smile. Yes, every single time she smiled was a blessing on this earth. It was a secret that no one knew. It was like a passing gift which only 'normal' people took for granted. It always reminded him of why he hated people like that to take for granted those things which he could only dream of having because he knew he could never have them. It was like what Melvin said, about how Carol was the best woman in the world and all those people she served in the diner never knew that they had met the best woman in the world, yet he did and no matter how despicable he could be, knowing that he was the only person in the world that knew she was the best woman in the world made him feel good. He smiled remembering going to see that film with her on a 'date'. If he could call it date. He didn't know what it was, but he supposed by that smile told him that she loved him. But theirs was a tragic love story. It was never going to go smoothly. They were never going to have a happy ending, no matter how much either of them wanted it. Maybe it the next life they would be allowed to have their happily ever after.
"Anthony. Thank God."
She blinked away the tears forming in her eyes. She looked desperate. Not just because her clothes were worn, her face was dirty but it was her voice. She stepped forward dropping her rucksack and opened her arms.
"Anthony, my love I'm so glad I found you."
She hugged him tightly. She missed him. She missed him more than anything. For years Aoife had thought about what would have happened if she had left with Anthony. She could have had a life with him. She could have been safe. She could have saved herself from the heartbreak she had to go through recently and that of which she had to live with for all these years. More times than she was willing to admit she had thought to herself, 'why didn't I listen to Anthony?' He was right, but she Effie was her friend. She had saved her from the cages. She could had been killed in a dog fight but Effie saw her and knew she had to save her. But Anthony saved her in a lot of other ways as well. She could never forget that, which was why she could never forgive herself for not leaving with him. She knew that from the expression on her face that she had broken his heart by letting him go. Now she was going to hold onto him so tightly that he was never going to slip from her grasp again. Not by her hand or anyone else's. Not even his own. She drew away from him and pressed her forehead against his and for a moment she felt like a young woman again, yearning to kiss a boy so hard and for so long that it was like the world was never going to end. Then she heard the snap of a twig and they both looked up sharply to see a gangly boy with sharp facial feature staring at them.
"Tom."
Aoife's eyes widened and turned back to the boy. The last time she saw him was when he was a baby. She remembered the night Anthony brought him to her. He was in tears when he told her about how he killed his family. He felt so guilty, he hated himself so much for what he had done without bringing into account the fact that he could not control himself when he became that monster. She knew what that felt like considering it was a feeling that she brought upon herself so often. It was an art, to not blame yourself for the monstrous things you did, which took a lifetime to master. Anthony had handed her the child, it was crying and bleeding but she was able to save him. Anthony thanked her so much for that blessing but at the same time she knew there was a part of him which wished she hadn't done considering the life Anthony had now dragged him into. She had to admit for a while she pretended that Tom was her son and it could be the precursor of Anthony and Aoife's union but she could never leave Effie. Nothing seemed to able to drag her away from Effie. Not until now. Now she had no where else to go.
He gripped onto Aoife's shoulders. "This is an old friend of mine. Aoife."
Tom sniffed and then realisation filled his eyes. "She's a werewolf." He almost seemed excited as he stepped forward to shake her hand. "It's really nice to meet ya."
She beamed at Tom. "It's lovely to see you again, Tom." Anthony stared at her in horror and it was then she realised her mistake but then turned back to Tom and put her smile back on her face. "I don't think you'll remember me but I knew your parents when you were very young." She lied.
He blinked with a hopeful smile of his face. "You met my Mum?"
She nodded with a tight smile. "I knew her very well."
Scotland, 1956
Effie was hungry. She was hungry for blood. Not because she thirsted for it, not because it was just her deep hunger deep within her calling out for another feast but it was from something else which yearned to be satisfied. Revenge. She listened to the sounds of laughter and songs from good times as she waited out in the cold until it was the right time for her to strike. As she watched and listened she found herself shaking not because of the cold, she could never feel the cold any more. It was because she was vibrating with such rage that she was just managing to contain. She couldn't go another day like this. She needed to kill them. Not for herself. But for Alexi. For her unborn child. For those who were going to give her the chance for a normal life. Well, the closest she could get to it anyway...
It was strange. Throughout the night it was almost like she could hear Alexi's voice in her head. It was so quiet, so gentle it like a whisper on the wind. It was telling her to leave. Run away. Let it go. But she couldn't let it go. She wasn't going to let those dogs get away with what they did to her. What they took from her. She was going to make them feel what she had felt for all these years while she was trying to track them down. She was going to make them pay for their unpunished sins. She could turn to her own later...
Wales, 2011
"Why are you here, Aoife?"
Aoife was staring up at the sky when he asked this question. She was trying to pretend that she hadn't heard him because it was something which she hoped for the entire time she was looking for Anthony that he would never end up asking her. It would just be proof of the fact that he hadn't forgiven her yet, or maybe it was something he was never going to be able to forgive her for. To be honest though, she couldn't really blame him. She had chosen someone who, yes saved her from a terrible fate but look at what happened in the end. She might as well have left with Anthony when she had the chance. She chose someone who persecuted her own kind over someone else who was not only her own kind but the love of her life. What did that say about her? Hypocrite was the word which came to mind. She didn't deserve someone like Anthony. She didn't deserve someone as noble and kind as someone like him. When she first saw him, he hadn't changed that much but she could see the coldness in his eyes and the brutality in his face. These longs years they were apart from one another had changed him. She could still see the man she once knew inside him somewhere but that man was almost gone, with this vampire hunter, this werewolf which had now almost come to point of consuming him. She was beginning to consider whether maybe she was cause of all that. Maybe he would have still be the kind, gentle man she knew, but in this case there was no point playing the game of 'if', 'buts' or 'maybes'. They couldn't even have that any more because there was no point. It could never become a reality.
She had recently met with another werewolf, Milo. An interesting one, his reasoning for siding with the vampires made sense but at the same time she couldn't help but be reminded of her own cowardice when she heard what he had to say about it all. He had lost hope in his own kind. He sided with the seemingly stronger army rather than strengthening his own. Hearing Milo's story made her feel even more ashamed of herself rather than thinking 'at least I'm not as bad as him'. When she considered the choices she had made she felt more like a vampire than a werewolf. She was avoiding her own monstrosity. She was being an opportunist. She was a traitor to humanity. Strangely enough though , Aoife always preferred the night to the day. There was a time when it frightened her. It reminded her of what she was and the other things that were out there which were once just bedtime stories to scare children into going to bed. Even that made her laugh. To think there was a time when even after hearing all those stories and when you're at an age where you believe them and you still think you're safe in that soft, warm bed. Whose to say a vampire has never snatched a child away from that warm sanctuary in order to quench their thirst. Yet now, the night seemed more peaceful. More calm that the rush of the day. It encouraged people to gaze at the stars, to rest, to sleep, to sit down and laugh with old friends. It made time stop. That was all she seemed to want these days. Just for time to stop, just for a moment. It was one of things she wished she had more of. Time. Yet that was something, not even vampires were allowed to have. They remained here for centuries sometimes but eventually they would find that they would never have enough time, they had a clock which ticked too. It was just slower than others. They had to wait longer for it to stop.
"Aoife?"
She jumped at the sound of his voice. It seemed more harsher than before. She knew it was just him raising his voice a little but it sounded more like a bark.
"Yes?"
Anthony blinked with an amused but annoyed smile on his face, it was the same expression which he had when he was asking her desperately all those years ago why she would not come with him. She often dreams of that cold night. Anthony had Tom in his arms, wrapped in that warm bundle clinging him to his chest as if Aoife herself was a danger to the boy.
"Why are you here?"
She threw her head back to the ground with a slight thud and stared back up at the sky before taking a deep breath. "Am I not allowed to...to see you?" Anthony gave her a look which had her laugh. "No of course I'm not. Because all is yet to be forgive isn't Anthony?" She stopped for a moment thinking about what she was actually saying and rubbed her eyes. "I'm sorry. You're right, I've been a right...bitch, haven't I?" She heart him chuckle at this which was a good sign. "I just...I haven't got anywhere else to go. Effie's...?"
Anthony glanced over at her curiously. "Effie's what?"
Aoife turned her head to look at Anthony and the moment she did that she realised that she couldn't talk about Effie. Not right now at least. She was going to have to get used to that blood-thirsty need to kill vampires. The wound which Effie left was still raw and it was too painful to talk about what had happened between them. What she and Effie had between them. At the end of the day she was still her friend. She was her saviour. She was her responsibility and her monster. All the bad and the good made that wound sting and she was going back and forth between mourning that loss and hating her what all that she took from her. All the guilt which was dragged between them both. She was only going to be able to talk about Effie when she able to decide which of those sides she was going to take. Or whether she would find a healthy middle. God, she could kill for that but how could it be possible to find a 'healthy middle' between those two things? Especially when it concerned Anthony as well. And Vera. Everyone was cared about was involved in this. Sometimes she felt like she had been left with the responsibility of carrying the repercussions of everything that had happened, as if it was all her fault, but she supposed she wasn't entirely guiltless in how everything had ended. No one involved was innocent but she could admit to the fact that she was less innocent than most of them. It just hurt to admit that since, it made her biggest monster out of all of them. And having to admit that you were a bigger monster than a vampire left a massive bruise on the ego. She hated everything that the vampires had done to her, maybe not Vera, but she even hating the things Effie had not allowed her to have. Aoife sighed and closed her eyes. She didn't want to talk about Effie right now. Right now she just wanted to sleep. She wanted to be able to sleep without having a nightmare, without worrying that she was going to wake up and find out that she was better off still sleeping.
London, 1970
"Vera its time for school!"
"I bet George Orwell's disappointed by how the actual 1984 turned out..." Aoife murmured as she read the dystopian classic.
"Vera the bus is coming in ten minutes! I hope you're ready!" Effie called, ignoring her.
"Is it just me or is Julia a bit of a slag?" The Irish werewolf commented conversationally. "I mean I know she's living in a society where enjoying sex is off limits but-"
"Well I can see that your Catholic upbringing still hasn't quite rubbed off you." Called a familiar voice.
Aoife couldn't help but raise an eyebrow at this comment. She had to admit she was sometimes a little bit of a staunch Catholic but let's face it, when you were brought up with five older brothers and a father who would beat you for getting your Hail Mary's wrong it was going to take a while for all the conditioned traits of a Catholic. Even if you were thrust into such a life she was living now which was the completely opposite of the one which she had before. Living with those you were told as a child were evil, becoming friends with a homosexual, now her father would have had a fit about that one. But at least she could see with her own eyes that Carl was anything but evil. He was the kindest, gentlest person she had ever met and he was a vampire. Now that was saying something.
Effie glanced by the back door, her heart pounding but smiled with relief when she saw it was Carl. He glided through the kitchen as if he was on roller-skates. He looked content, happy. If only she could be up there with him on cloud nine. Carl also knew about Aoife. Carl was the only person she could tell about this kind of thing. If it was anyone else who had walked through that door she would be dead. Effie would be stripped of her powers before she could blink and Aoife would be back in line for the next dog fight.
"Are you trying to say I shouldn't have standards, Carl?"
Carl chuckled. "Not at all. I just think you should be a little less prude."
"Vera come on!"
"Well I don't mind you having a boyfriend now do I?" She retorted as she turned back to her book.
Carl cocked his head to the side. "True."
"Carl?"
A bright eyed little blonde girl skipped down the stairs and ran towards Carl with her arms wide open.
"Hello my darling! And how are you today?"
"I've missed you. Where have you been?"
"Oh I've been tending to my sweet, sweetheart." He replied.
Aoife raised an eyebrow at this with Effie giving her a warning look not to say anything. Aoife couldn't help it though she like it when Carl was like this. Carl's boyfriend, Oliver had been ill for the past few days. Effie had been getting anxious calls in the night from Carl asking her whether something was the right medicine and what to do when this or that happened. He had never seen him like this before. It was a good sign but at the same time Effie couldn't help but be a little worried. He was getting too serious, too soon. Oliver didn't even know what he was. She just didn't want him to get his heart broken all over again.
"I hope he's alright."
"He's fine now. Anyway, I believe you need to catch a bus."
Vera's eyes widened with panic, jumped off his lap and ran out the door with Effie following behind with a tired smile on her face.
"I'll be back in fifteen minutes." She called.
After they heard the door shut Carl turned to Aoife. "She looks tired."
Aoife glanced in the direction of the door with an expression of shared concern which she flickered away with a blink and turned back to her book. She was doing that a lot these days. Noticing but never acting on it. Then again when she did voice her opinion about it all she was met with a tired, blood-thirsty, annoyed vampire. Anyone in her position would understand from that experience that it was better to leave things as they were. She knew better than to bring that up, especially with anyone else since it would lead them to trying to talk to Effie about it only to be met with the same results. She knew that if she said anything to Carl Effie would know that she was one who said something. Whenever Aoife tried to say something about it Effie would snap back at her so ferociously that Aoife thought she might actually rip her throat out. At first Aoife thought that she was just taking on the role of being a mother again. She had told her everything about her life before she was turned into a vampire and Aoife couldn't help but jump to the conclusion that she was just trying to re-live the life she once had or could have had. She was avoiding the reality of life as it was. Then when she began to watch her more closely, her routines and so forth she actually began to see that there was more to it than that. It was the one thing in her life which was keeping everything in order. It was what she needed. It was what kept her sane and if anyone attacked that then she would jump down your throat about it. It was understandable, it was just that it was getting to the point of her trying to tire herself out so that she wouldn't have the energy to kill someone anyway. But there was something else. There was something which she was feeling guilty about and considering what she was Aoife could make an educated guess as to what sins she was trying to repent.
Aoife shrugged her shoulders. "She can never really get that much sleep."
"I'm worried about her. She puts so much work into all this. Obviously you haven't known her for that long so...You'll soon come to understand how she can be...quite generous."
Aoife slowly put down her book and turned back to him with an offended expression. "Are you trying to say I'm taking-"
"No. No I'm not saying that at all. I should have put it in another way. I mean- She's always had this sense of responsibility. She's slipped a couple or more than a couple of times but when she has the need to be...better. It gets stronger. Which is understandable but before all that, Effie...When she was human her mother died when she was very young. She had to be the mother of the household. She's always been used to looking after people. And now well...She feels responsible for the rest of the world..."
Aoife shrugged her shoulders. "Well of course she does. I mean- She's a vampire. Of course she's got to remember that. She's protecting them. Like I am. I mean I know I don't have it twenty-four hours, seven days a week but...Once a month I turn into something else. Something which is far from what I am. After the first time...I could barely recognise myself. Even though I could use my...curse as an excuse I still have to protect the world from that other side of me. Like Effie."
Carl smirked. "I can see the little Catholic girl creeping out again."
"Oh ha-bloody-ha."
Sometimes Aoife thought Carl harked about her Catholic upbringing just a little too much. She wasn't continually going on about the fact that he was gay. She treated his relationships as she would with any of her straight friends so if he was interpreted her behaviour as otherwise then he was more short-sighted than she thought which was not at all. Then again there was the reasonable side to her which wanted to say that it was just banter. It was just a bit of fun, but she didn't want to be that person any more. Even though the life that she was living now was agonising, but she would choose this life over the one she had before in a heartbeat. Back home she was treated like she was nothing. She was made to think that she had done this or that wrong and she was wrong. She was made to feel like life was supposed to be complete agony and that was not fair. Even though this ticket out of her old life came at a high price but it was one she was willing to pay nonetheless.
"I'm being serious though, Aoife. You shouldn't be so hard of yourself, speaking from an outsider's perspective I think you're all doing pretty well. And I can see that you're not taking advantage of her because even you're acknowledging the responsibility of your part and acting on it."
Aoife scoffed. "I'm only doing that, Carl because I know that if I don't someone could get hurt and I couldn't have that on my conscience. And that isn't my Catholic side creeping in again."
"I know and to be honest I think we all worry about that...I mean, we worry about whether we're going to slip at some point. Whether we might hurt someone."
"Well at least we have that in common...we could lose control at any moment and like that we lose our humanity again."
Carl nodded. "That scares me more than anything. Just the idea..."
Aoife could see the tortured look on his face and suddenly realised why he cared about Oliver so much. He wasn't scared about his health. It wasn't just about that. He was scared for his safety. He was scared about the possibility of Oliver getting hurt by him, not just by discovering what he is but just the fact of being with Carl puts him in danger. But being lonely is the painful part of their condition.
"Well at least we've got each other to fall back on, eh?"
Carl was shaking but with a reassured smile on his face he nodded and took her hand. "Yes. Yes we do."
Wales, 2011
"So what did my Mum look like?"
Tom was asking Aoife so many questions about his 'mother' that she was wondering whether she was going to be able to maintain the lie which Anthony begged her to keep up. He was asking her about what she was like, did she cook or sew, was she religious, what were the colour of her eyes. Was she happy? That was a hard one for Aoife, not just because she didn't know the woman but lying about that particular question. What if she was wrong? What if the woman who was his mother wasn't happy? What if she had been trapped in an unhappy marriage, what then? When she glanced over at Tom sometimes she would catch him looking at her as if he was hoping that maybe she was his mother. That she had come back to the 'pack' as it were. That was another lie Anthony had told him. Tom went on about how there was a pack out there waiting for them. Like a family which they had been separated from and would eventually find once again. The idea of it sounded wonderful but that was a lie that was definitely going to bite Anthony in the ass one day. What if they never found this 'pack'? What then? Tom was still going to try and find them. One day he was going to figure it all out to be a lie and Anthony was going to have to explain himself and Anthony wasn't exactly the kind of man who would like to be in that situation.
She shrugged her shoulders carelessly. "She had blonde hair, my height maybe a little taller. She had your eyes."
Tom blinked at her and a small smile crept across his face and carried on picking up sticks for the fire. She thought that she was a nice little touch and it worked considering that it made him stop asking so many bloody questions. She was going to whack Anthony over the head for this. It wasn't fair to lie to Tom like this.
"Did you sleep well?"
She jumped at the sound of his voice. It was like he came out of nowhere, then again he could just be sneaking up on her. She wouldn't be surprised if he was overhearing all things she had been saying to Tom for the past few hours. She didn't know whether it was because she had been lying to Tom all morning which felt more like a test rather than a game of make-belief or it was just way that Anthony was talking now. She didn't know whether it was his morning voice or whether Anthony just sounded so gruff all the time, but she didn't like it. It made him sound so insincere. She didn't want to use this way of describing his voice but it made him sound like a dog barking at you. It was just the way that they spoke to you, they couldn't help it, almost like the way Anthony couldn't help the way that he was now. Lying, living in the wild, not trusting anyone, stuff like that. That's just who he was now.
"Better than the past few nights. Travelling alone these days is quite dangerous."
Anthony nodded in agreement. "I'm thinking of us moving on in a bit. You should too. I heard there was quite a stir down in Bristol."
Aoife raised her eyebrows. "Tell me about it. Effie...She saw it all happen."
"You didn't tell me last time...What happened to her."
She wasn't going to be able to avoid it now. She knew it and he knew, so she might as well give him a bone to chew on.
"She's dead...Dead-dead."
Anthony blinked. "She's dead?"
"Yes, Anthony. Dead. I'd rather not talk about it. Not right now. Even though...I've regretted a lot of things between us but she was still my friend. She still sacrificed a lot of things for me and I can't disregard all of that. Especially now that she's gone."
"But you know what she's done to our kind. You must know-"
"Oh I know. Trust me I know."
Scotland, 1956
She limped through the darkness hoping that she got them all. She was able to kill quite a few in their sleep or drunken state but then again there were still a few which put up a good fight. One was able to get a knife into her leg but she still carried on. She killed every last one of them. She knew she would be remembered for this. Then again she wasn't doing this for glory or any of that crap. And it really wasn't something to brag about. It wasn't like she caught them on a full moon or anything. She wasn't stupid enough to attack them on a full moon, fighting a werewolf was one thing but an entire pack, she knew the odds would be against her. Maybe if she had a pack of her own but she knew she had to do this alone. It was her job, it was her pain. It was something that she couldn't involved anyone else with. She could have asked Daisy and Ivan for help when they offered it but she knew that Daisy would get overly excited about it all and get herself killed. Ivan would never forgive Effie for that. In her own strange way she was protecting them both by putting herself in danger. Then again, it wouldn't be the first time.
"Damn it Alexi." She moaned as she grasped her leg. She dared to peer down at it as it oozed with blood and anything else which could have been on that dogs rusty knife.
"Damn it, why did you have to die on me my darling?"
London, 1970
She still found it hard to believe that rage could just take over her like that. Before she killed out of necessity but on that night fourteen years ago. It was like she had become this other person. She was personified rage. She didn't care about blood, she didn't care about those prejudices. It wouldn't have mattered whether they were werewolves or ghosts or anything else. They hurt the one man she loved. The only man she was willing to give her heart to and they killed him. It was like they had ripped her heart out from her chest. After that night she felt like an empty shell but now that she had Vera in her life, reconnecting with Carl and now Aoife...Well she was back on track on being human again. Though she knew she would have to tell Aoife one day about that night. She would feel like she was lying to her. She knew it would be hard but she deserved to know what kind of person she was living with. She walked through the door and hung up her coat and scarf before joining Carl in the kitchen.
"Sorry about that, Vera's impossible to get ready for school. Where's Aoife?"
"Went to college. What's she studying?"
"English. Why didn't you ask her?"
It wasn't like Carl to not be social and it wasn't like Aoife was shy or anything. Effie had to learn to ignore Aoife half the time since she chattered away so much.
Carl inclined his head to the side. "Well...I think she's still a little distrustful of me. Not that I blame her. You're the only vampire which she trusts. Although I suspect you're the only soul in the world whom she trusts."
Effie gave him a tight smile. "I don't know why."
"You saved her from the cages Effie."
"I know. But I was risking my skin. Vera. Everything I have. I took this job because I knew that I could do some good. I could set an example. Have a chance to make us all more..."
"Human?"
Effie for a moment. It was the most genuine smile Carl had seen from her in a long time. It was a ghost of a smile. Then again he could understand why she seldom smiled most of the time. She had to consort with those monster in the counsel. She hated herself for it knowing that she wasn't like them at all. If she had her way she would live in the countryside. She would live away from all of this but she knew it was the only way she could make a difference. Carl knew about the things which she had done. Good and bad. She knew that whenever she did something good it gave her hope and whenever she had done something bad it haunted her continuously. She could never let it go. Ever. Because of everything that she had done she had now given herself this impossible task of trying to be human. The other did it in order to survive, to get by in the world. Effie and Carl did it because they wanted something more than this life was offering them. It wasn't even a life. It was a prison.
"It's an impossible dream, for impossible dreamers like us, Effie. It's something which needs to be decided out of choice, not forced upon us otherwise...It won't last long."
Scotland, 1956
"Effie."
Effie looked out into the darkness and saw a tall silhouette standing from beneath the trees. He was leaning against the trunk so careless, so relaxed that for a moment she thought it was him. She thought it was her Alexi who had come back from the dead. She skipped over to him not caring about the pain in her leg. She just wanted to be with him but then when she got closer she saw that it wasn't Alexi. He hadn't come back. He was gone for good. Ivan stepped out the shadows and noticed the cut on her leg. He knelt down and grasped her calve gently.
"Daisy I found her."
A red haired, Scottish beauty skipped over the hill and embraced Effie. "Did you get em?" Effie nodded, still a little shaken. "Good. Bloody dogs deserved it after what they did to you. You know that right?"
"Course I do."
"We'll have to get someone to look at this. You won't die from it. Of course. But Alexis wouldn't forgive us if we left you like this either."
Effie tilted her head to the side. "Alright."
Daisy offered her arm to Effie and wrapped her arm around her when Effie sank into the embrace. Ivan took her from the other side.
"How do you feel?"
Effie smile. "Like I could take on the whole world."
London, 1970
"Aoife?"
Aoife blinked and looked up from her copy of 1984 to see Jared there smiling at the far-away expression on her face.
"You enjoying it?"
Aoife nodded. "Sorry. I can just...really get into a book if I'm enjoying it. You know?"
Jared nodded. "Yeah."
She could tell that he was only saying that so he wouldn't have to go into one of those debates as to why he didn't get her view or so that she wouldn't have to explain. That was something that she liked about Jared. He wasn't one of those types who wanted to scream through a microphone of anything like that. He was quiet and kind and considerate. She needed someone like that. Aoife tilted her head as she watched him smile. She liked his smile. It reminded her of melted butter on hot toast.
"I was just wondering if you were doing anything tonight...It's just I'm having a house party and I was wondering if you wanted to come round?"
Aoife felt herself blush and tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. "Um...Well I might be able to pop round. Maybe?"
She knew the rules. She had to always bare in mind that Vera went to bed early not that she was really a child but Effie always treated her like that. Effie also told her that since she helped her escape from the cages the other vampires would be keeping an eye out for her so she had to stay safe when it came to going out at night. Then again Jared didn't live too far away from where she lived. Why wouldn't this one time hurt? She saw the desperate look in his eyes and this was the first time someone she really liked was obviously liking her back. It wasn't some spotty butcher boy or pudgy boy next door. For once.
She nodded. "Sure. That would be great."
"Really?"
She nodded as enthusiastically as he sounded. "Sure. It sounds brilliant. I think I need to start getting out more often anyway. I haven't exactly been living the student lifestyle. I'll tell you that."
"Oh well there really isn't a right or wrong way is there?" He replied with an earnest look on his face.
She blinked and smiled. "No I suppose there isn't. Is there?"
Jared looked so relieved when she said yes. She thought about it all day, that smile when they both knew that they liked each other. When they both knew they had both thought about the idea of what it would be like to hug each other, kiss each other, stare into each others eyes without blinking, lie in each others arms throughout the night, look at the stars, stare up at the moon...That was the moment when reality kicked in. Aoife knew she wasn't allowed to have a normal life. Not with that little dark secret. But then again, she was allowed one night wasn't she? She was allowed one night when she could at least pretend to be normal. Feel loved. Despite all these rules Effie had put in place wasn't that what she was doing? Trying to be normal? Pretending to be human?
Wales, 2011
Aoife was watching Tom start the fire wondering whether this had been his entire life. It probably was which was sad but also rather cruel on Anthony's part.
"Does he have a girlfriend?"
Anthony looked up at her and gave her a cold, hard stare. "No."
She shrugged her shoulders. "Just asking a question."
"An inappropriate question."
"That's rich." She sneered. "How do you know anyway? That he doesn't."
"I keep a sharp eye on him. He has enough work to keep him occupied." She giggled at this making Anthony turn back to her. "What?"
"Nothing, you've just obviously forgotten about what boys can be like at that age."
"Oi. I'm not that old."
She chuckled and turned back to Tom. She could see that he was so similar but so different from Anthony in so many ways.
"Anyway what's wrong with that. He's kind. He would be good to anyone who was with him. He also looks lonely, Anthony. He can't live like this forever."
"What other life could he have?"
"Something closer to normal than...this."
"Well you tried that out and look what happened to you."
Aoife was staring daggers at Anthony now. She had many moments in her life where she was beyond pissed and right now that comment had taken her to the top of the list where she had been the most pissed. He had no right to talk about her friends, her family like that. For what they had, in the time which they had what they had it was good. No, it was better than good and he was challenging that so carelessly, so flippantly that he wasn't even bothered to consider what it was he was actually saying. She may have made a comment or two about the sort of life he was leading but at least she wasn't openly insulting him about it. At least she was being the kinder one of the two. She was the one who wasn't lying to a young man about who he was and where he came from. Anthony was pretending to be the one who could take the moral high ground yet he was the one who not only took Tom's life away, but his parents and any chances of normality. He was dragging that poor boy into this life, if she could even bring herself to call it a life and he was saying it was all he could have as if he had nothing to do with the fact that he wasn't allowed all things he could have had. Anthony raised his eyebrows and shrugged his shoulders as if there was nothing wrong with what he said, which was just the cherry on top of the ice cream. Hence why she felt completely justified with getting to her feet, striding over to him and giving him a swift slap across the face.
Tom stared at them both so helplessly that he just stood there with his hands in his pockets and eventually turned back to what he was doing. Anthony wiped his mouth which was now bloody and glanced at Aoife.
"Did I offend you?"
"Yes, Anthony. You bloody offended me!" She fumed. "Do you have any idea of how that makes me feel? Saying those things about my friends? Do you?"
"Your friends drove you away and now you've come crawling back here. If I'm going to be honest with you I think you know what I said was true, you just can't face it."
She shook her head with her eyes stinging with tears threatening to roll down her cheeks. She brushed them away roughly knowing that of all people she didn't want to find herself crying in front of Anthony. He didn't deserve her tears.
"Just because it didn't turn out well doesn't mean I wasn't happy."
"Is that why you didn't leave with me? You thought that you couldn't be happy?"
For the first time Aoife caught a glimpse of that kind man Anthony McNair once was. It took her back to that night all those years ago when he was standing at their doorstep begging her to come with him.
She shook her head. "No. I felt...I thought that if I left with you that I would be saying that I wasn't grateful. To her. She was the one who saved me from the cages, Anthony."
"YOU DIDN'T OWE HER ANYTHING AOIFE!" He roared. "You think she gave up a lot for you but at the end of the day you gave up more for her. More than she deserved."
London, 2011
Aoife's clothes were plastered to her skin due to the cold, hard rain pouring outside and slipped off her shoes knowing that Effie would have a fit if she found that she had left mud tracks all over the carpet. She called out hello but there was no reply. That was the first sign that something was wrong. There was always someone in. Ian was always in the house. The house seemed colder than it usually was. Something was going on and whatever it was, she didn't like it. The moment Aoife walked into the kitchen she knew that something was definitely wrong. When Effie glanced up at her, her eyes red from crying for hours and her hand shaking she knew everything was going to change. When Aoife glanced down at Effie's hand her eyes widened at the object she was carrying. She stared back at her in horror knowing that there could be only one reason as to why Effie would have a stake in her hand. This was the moment she was dreading. They had been happy. For forty-odd years they had been happy together in their little sanctuary. It wasn't perfect but it was the closest to normal they were ever going to get. They had somehow been able to keep Aoife and Ian's presence in the house a secret for a long time now. They had been more than lucky. They were blessed. Aoife would have been happy to be the one to leave, and they only way one would leave this family was to die. She wouldn't mind being the one to leave everyone else behind. In her own selfish way, it was her way of making herself feel better about her own condition. At least she didn't have to endure for centuries.
"Effie..."
"I know what this looks like-"
"Yeah and before you say its something completely different let me tell you something Effie Blackwood I am not that stupid. It is what it looks." She leaned back against the counter and shook her head. "Why are you doing this? Aren't you happy? Haven't we been happy?"
Effie smiled sadly and nodded. "Yeah, but you all deserve more than someone like me. I...I've done things-"
"Don't do this."
"Terrible things-"
"Effie."
"I have killed countless people. Werewolves...When Alexis died..."
Aoife could tell from the pain in her face that this was something which wasn't easy for Effie to say but it needed to be said. She knew what that could be like so she patiently waited for her to bring herself to speak again.
"Alexis was killed by a pack of werewolves. I took my revenge months after finding them and I killed them all. Husbands, wives, brothers, sisters, daughters, sons. It didn't matter to me. All that mattered was my pain. Before I had restrained myself with Alexis but we still killed people to maintain our hunger. Before that I was ruthless. I wasn't as famous as John Mitchell, Mr Snow or Hal York but I accepted it because I wouldn't face up to the fact that I could do better. I was careless and today after hearing about Mitchell's demise and the reasons why...I can't help but think how honourable that is."
At this point Aoife was seething with anger. Before he left Anthony tried to tell her that there was something about Effie that she didn't know. That she didn't deserve Aoife's kindness. She had pushed him out the door and screamed never to return again. Now she knew what he was trying to tell her. If she had known that Effie was responsible for the deaths of all those werewolves, she wasn't going to lie, she would have left before she could blink. Ever since she relinquished the life she once had she had pledged her allegiance to those of her own kind. All of the other werewolves out there were her family and now she was standing in front of the one exception she made from a group of those who opposed her. The exception who was telling her that she persecuted, no murdered her own kind out of mourning. She had heard tales of that night and reminded her of the scary bedtime stories when she was a child. It filled you with dread and fear. She had been defending that shadow in the night all these years when she could have been with the love of her life. She could have had a real family while she had been thinking for all these years that this was the closest to a family that she was capable of having. So right now hearing Effie attach the word 'honourable' to a vampire was pushing it slightly.
"What do you mean?"
"The fact that he can sacrifice himself for humanity. To protect them by demising himself that...I knew Mitchell when he was a senseless killer. When he thought of nothing but his hunger. So to see him commit such a selfless act...I can only describe that a miracle."
Effie looked down at the stake in her hand and then handed it to Aoife. "That's why I'm asking you to do this. Vera won't do it. Ian won't."
"And I will? Because I'm the only one you can piss off enough to be willing to do this? How-"
"I know I'm asking something of you which isn't fair but I also know that I should have told you this years ago. But I was scared. I was scared that you would hate me for-"
"OF COURSE I WOULD! YOU MURDERED MY OWN KIND!" She screamed. "I gave up so much for you. You have no idea."
"I know and there are...no words sufficient to express how sorry I am. Truly. So please." She offered the stake to her like a gift or a trophy. "End it."
Wales, 2011
Aoife decided to leave while they were sleeping. She didn't like saying goodbyes. Neither of them did so she figured that the kindest thing she could do was save them both for the pain of goodbyes. She had just packed everything up and began walking away only to hear a voice from the dark.
"You're leaving?"
Aoife looked over her shoulder and saw Anthony leaning against the tree. "I thought it would be best. You and Tom have this together. It would just be too hard for me to try and be a part of it."
Anthony looked down with an expression of resignation and nodded. He was beginning to walk away until she spoke again.
"It was me. I was the one who killed her. Only because she asked me to. She saw it...She saw it as her way of protecting humanity. She was filled with so much guilt, Anthony. Over what she had done and when I staked her all that hate towards all those people and werewolves almost vanished. There is still some resentment there but I can at least admire her for what she did for us all in the end."
Anthony didn't say anything. They both knew she had nothing to say about any of it. He was probably glad that Effie Blackwood was no longer in the world. She was better being out of it and Aoife wasn't going to dispute that. Though, she wasn't going to deny that it hurt.
"You don't have to leave. You can be part of this life...if you think it would be because I didn't want you to be...Please stay."
Aoife smiled and walked towards him. When she was close enough she put her hand on his face and he seemed to sigh with relief and pain. It was dark but for a moment she thought that there was a tear rolling down his cheek.
"Oh my darling, I can't. Even though you tell me I don't owe her anything but there was something else which Effie asked of me. It was another secret that she saved for the last moment or more after her last moments. There's something that she asked me to do and before you saying anything I'm not doing it for her."
"Good."
She smiled at this and continued. "I'm not doing this for her because what she asked of me is bigger than the rest of us. If I'm doing it for anyone, I'm doing it for the reasons why I killed Effie. I'm doing this for humanity."
Anthony looked confused. "I don't understand what is it she asked you to do?"
She shook her head. "I can't really tell you. I will though. If I see you again I'll explain then, but for now...You're going to have to settle with that I'm, in a way, saving the world."
