I'm not a masochist. I never was. I might be a bit sadistic, but never a masochist.
So then why was I here, standing in her room, watching her? Maybe I'm a bit more of a masochist than I will ever admit. I mean, she's got St. Stefan, why on earth would she need Damon Salvatore, the psychopathic heartless murderer?
St. Stefan would kill me if he knew I was here now, even though she just broke up with him. She thinks Katherine has won, but I refuse to let her win, especially because she's hurt her so much, killing her father, compelling her aunt to stab herself. I hate Katherine for it.
Why was I cursed with loving this girl? Why not some silly little girl with no respect for herself that I could just sweep away and forget all of this heartbreak stuff? Why couldn't I have just died in 1864?
And it doesn't help that she hates me. I'm not saying she has no reason to hate me but still, can't shesee I love her? That I'm in love with her? That I could protect her and keep her safe in ways that St. Stefan can't. I can make her content, and not just content, happy, genuinely happy. She was happy while we were in Georgia. And when I thought she kissed me, I was ecstatic. Because I'm in love with her. Not because I'm some manipulative, selfish, self-serving psychopath.
I reached out and softly stroked her cheek. She reached out to me and I placed a soft kiss on her palm.
"I love you," I whispered, too softly for humans to hear. She should already know. Isobel told her.
"Damon," she whispered so softly I thought she had woken as I turned to leave via window, "Damon stay."
I turned slowly, wondering if I had been caught. Would she hate me more now? I exhaled quietly as I saw she was still fast asleep before a smile came to my lips. She is dreaming of me. She wants me to stay with her in her dream.
"I will," I whispered back, sitting down at the foot of the bed.
"Damon, please protect me," my angel, summoned from my own personal Inferno,whimpered.
"Don't worry, Elena, I will," I promised.
"Thank Damon. I love you. I won't let her take you from me." I smiled sadly. I had a feeling her is Katherine. If she'd say that when she was awake, then that would change out whole relationship. When she was asleep, she spoke with her mind unguarded, never afraid of other's feelings, not even St. Stefan's. When she was awake, she hated me, hates me.
"I love you too," I whispered before turning and walking out of her room. I'd walk out of her life too, but I'd never leave her with my unstable brother and my deranged ex, a snarky witch for one best friend and a newborn vampire for another, a psycho vampire mother, and a vampire hunter stepfather, and no one to protect her. So I'll watch from a distance, no matter how much pain it causes me. Because I love her.