In soul society after Aizen Sousuke, Ichimaru Gin, and Kaname Tousen betrayed gotei 13, people keep dicussing about who's gonna be the the new captain. Renji, Rukia, Matsumoto, Ikakku, Toushirou and other, same as usual without Ichigo, were discussing that too.

"I really want to know who's going to be the new captain!" said Rukia opening the conversation.

"I don't really know, but I'm sure it's not going to be you"said Renji.

"I never say I want to! Besides, nii-sama doen't allow me to be ranked officers!"said Rukia.

"That good for you, it's weird to have two Kuchiki taichou! I still prefer Ikakku to be the captain."said Renji.

"I pass, I've said to you I never wanna be a Taichou! The captain jacket really irritate me, I can't even imagine to wear triple layers of clothes around, it's really hot! you can't move and fight freely with that."said Ikakku.

"Neither I want to. I've heard that captain jacket weight about 250 kg, it would made me less beautiful wearing that heavy jacket."said Yumichika in front of the small mirror that he bring everywhere.

"WHAT!?"said everyone.

"You beauty liar, captain jacket is as light as feather."said Hitsugaya Toushirou.

"You don't have any sense of humor Hitsugaya taichou"said Yumichika unhappily.

"Neee, Taichou. Do you think Hinamori was going to be a captain? Since she was the 5th division fukutaichou."said Matsumoto.

"Yeah, she's a kidou master too."said Renji.

"No way she would be one of the captain, she hasn't even mastered bankai!"said Toushirou.

"You're mean Taichou! I'm sure Hinamori will be one someday after she mastered her bankai"said Matsumoto.

"I can't even imagine her doing bankai, what could her bankai named, bed-wetter toubihime?"said Toushirou.

"What about Hisagi?"said Rukia.

"No way, he got line and number tattoo on his face"said Renji.

"You got more weird tattoo on your eyebrow"said Rukia.

"WHAT!! How dare-"

"Hey, I think Ichigo suits to be a captain."said Ikakku changing the subject.

"That guy who always split out reiatsu everywhere?" said Toushirou.

"Heeeh, but he didn't even attend the shinigami academy"said Matsumoto.

"I can't imagine him doing hadou, it would be more worst than Renji"said Rukia.

"Maybe you guys should built a special shinigami academy for a specious like us! Just for a person who's poor at hadou and kidou"said Renji a little bit angry.

"You mean a shinigami academy with anti-hadou wall? So that it couldn't break because of demon magic?"said Toushirou.

"You're right, I think"said Kuchiki Byakuya suddenly appear.

"Kuchiki Taichou!"said Renji.

"Nii-sama, you shouldn't care about Ichigo that much"said Rukia.

"Who care with that low human, I come here to find Renji"said Byakuya.

Ichigo in the human world

"Haystchii!!"

"Ichi-nii, did you get a fever?" ask Karin, Ichigo little sister.

"Hey! Don't sneeze in front of the food, grosss!!" said Isshin.

"Ehh, are you alright nii-chan, do you need me to take medicine for you?"said Yuzu.

"No, It's okay. I think to many people talk about me"said Ichigo.

Back to soul society

"Why are you finding me, Taichou?"said Byakuya.

"You're the one who clean the corridor at the 6th division office right?"said Byakuya.

"Huh? Why yes, since there a lot of rubbish like banana skin"

"I use that banana skin for decoration! The corridor was too plain!"

"What? You use banana skin for decoration? You have strange taste taichou!"said Renji.

"You want to eat my bankai again?"said Byakuya.

". . .Your sakura taste weird"said Renji.

"I mean, you want to take my bankai again?"

"You want to give it to me?"said Renji.

". . ." Byakuya.

"Renji! How can you make unfunny joke with nii-sama words!"said Rukia.

"As if you never make joke with someone else!"said Renji.

"At least not to nii-sama!"said Rukia.

"It start again. . ."said Toushirou.

"Hoi! Isn't that we are going to discuss who's going to be the next captain?"said Ikakku.

"Forget about it! Just polish your beauty."said Yumichika.

"I'm almost forget, hey! Everyone , do you want to eat the bento I made? It's enough for everybody!"said Matsumoto.

"NO THANKS, EAT IT YOURSELF!"said everybody.

Finish (?)

shirouXiceXhyourinmaru

sorry if there are any mistake and if i is not funny