Disclaimer - I need some more words so I will just add more words if you don't mind. Thank you. Also, I don't own Hary Pot, Harry Poter or Hary Potter. Also, I have a nice car to sell, anyone interested send me a message and we can make the greatest deal in history of deals.

Hary Pott

chapter 1(and only) - Bubaduba

Hary Pot was walking towards a train which will taken him to HOGWARTZ.

He entered the train and sat in an empty compartment. He started to read books cause he wanted to be smart not dumb. After a few minutes, a girl his age entered and said, "Hello, can I sit here?". Harry looked at her and saw she was nott pretty too much and he wanted to have apretty girlfriend so he said, "Sorry, I have a boyfriend". She started to cry cause she knew she wasn't a pretty grill, and left to cry in the train's bathroom thingy. Harry read for some time, then he thought that he should practice OFFENSIVE SPELLZ, so he was a powerful wizard and not some kind of David Copperfield fraud. He took out his wand and started to cast OFFENSIVE MAGIC. He shouted, "black people don't win as many academy awards as white people because there aren't as many black people in filming industry and not because of racism!"

The door to his compartment swung open immdediatly and a black boy entered, visibly ANGERY. He took out his wand, much bigger than Harry's and started to cast DARK MAGIC.

"Another nigga shot by the popo!", he screamed and Hary fell to the floor, unconcious.

Hary Pott woke up when the HOGWARTS TRAIN was already on the platform. Hary changed into his school robes and went to the platform. He was still angry with himself cause he lost to another wizard in a fair duel. He decided that he won't ever lose again and he will become the very best, like no one ever was. He went to the school with other first yeah students and saw that the boy who defeated him wasn't in this group. He was a bit less angry cause he apperantly lost to an older student so it wasn't as bad. They were greeted by a professor MC Gone A Gall. Harry didn't like her cause she looked old and he wasn't really into that milf stuff. After a few moments, they went into the great hall and the sorting began.

Finally, it was Hary's turn. As he was quite famous already, cause he has beaten a famous BAD GUY when he was a toddler, people were paying much attention to his sorting. He sat on the stool and heard a voice in his head, which wasnnot too uncommon for him , as he was crazy.

"Hmm, what do we have here? You are obviously retarded, so there's only one house I can sort you to. Better be...

BUBADUBA!"

Everyone, including Hary were confused by this. Hary knew he wasn't retarded, how could a person listening to k-pop be retarded? Anyway, the headmaster BUMBLYDOOR stood up and said, "This is awesome, we haven't had a student in Bubaduba House for 69 years! Hary, you will be the only student in that house, make sure you do your best and win the House Cup!". Harry knew he was the best wizard ever, so he thought that winning some kind of cup would sure be easy to him. He sat on the Bubaduba table, which was decorated in unicorns, and painted in every colour of the rainbow. He ate some food, and then went to his private common room, which was situated in the girls bathroom on the second floor. He was surprised, cause there was a girl in his dorm, but she was a ghost so having sex would be a bit weird, even for Hary. He wondered who his head of the house would be, as Harry always liked head. But he thought that he probably will learn that the next day, and after reading some books to be smart, he went to sleep in his comfortable pink bed.

Hary woke up when he heard a voice, saying, "Oh, finally, I have a student! Wake up young one, I'm your HEAD OF THE HOUSE." Hary was curious and he wanted to know who would be his mentor so he looked up. He saw a handsome man in his thirties, black hair and beautiful green eyes, but Harry was no homo so he didn't get too horny. Instead, he said, "Hello, I'm Hary Pot, nice to meet you. Who are you?". The man looked at him and answered, "My name is Tom Marvolo Riddle, I'm your head of the house. You should go to the great hall for now, as the breakfast is ready. I will give you your schedule at breakfast. See ya there!". The man left and Hary started to prepare for breakfast, but he didn't take a shower cause there was this ghost girl busy stalking him and he felt a bit uncomfortable as his magic stick wasn't as big as it should be. After a few minutes of doing nothing much, he changed and left.

When Hary arrived at the GREAT HALL, he saw a shocking scene. His head of the house, professor Tom Marvolo Riddle was dueling BUMBLYDOOR. They dueled for a long time, and Tom was clearly angery with something. He said, "I should have expected this! I couldn't possibly fool Dumblyboor! He knew right away that I was the BAD GUY. " They traded powerful spells, but Tom was clearly outmatched by the HEAD MASTER. After a few minutes, Bublydoor used some unknown to everyone spell, and Tom fell down on his knees. He was frustrated and screamed, "What power is this?". The headmaster looked at him smiling and said, "This is the POWER OF LOVE BABYYYYYYYYYY!" Tom was visibly dying and he screamed his last words, "BUT I THOUGHT YOU WEREN'T GAY BUMBLYDOOR!"