Scout's Sad memories part one and two
There I stand. In a war, for what? Nothing, a war for nothing. Bullets fly past my emotionless face. Near dead people cry for a Medic while our Doctor franticly attempts to answer every crying plead. A flashing explosive lands by my feet and I snap out of my trance and sprint to the nearest thing I can use as a measly shelter, a box. The bomb Exploded and I could feel the vibrations slam though my body as it hurled me towards a brick wall. I stumbled to my feet with blood dripping from my nose and my legs covered in bloody scrapes and bruises. I was weak, and the enemy knew that now, witch made me an easy target. I had to get my self together but I was being constantly chased by ammunition. I got to my feet and made a B-line for the red base where I could be safe. I got back on my feet and drove my self past the heat of battle. All around me are piles of dead bodies, once people I knew and enough to make a man sick. The thick of the crowd was just coming into my view, I still had a long way to go to get to my destination. The cries of solders everywhere, guns blazing and blood spilling. Just inches from the finnish line I was hit. A sniper had drove a rifle bullet deep into my thigh. I hit the ground inches from the gates, and all my strength I pulled myself to the doors. thats when things got foggy. I start to see double and then black. I was out like a light. When I woke my mother stood over me. "honey get up! I'm not runnin a resort here!" I just got up casually not aware that I was having a dream. I rushed to the kitchen table to get breakfast and pushed though my brothers who where dashing to fill there plates. As usual whenI I got there nothing was left but a drop of milk and an empty plate. my brothers always got first picks. so I just went back in my room. I sat on my mattress flipping a baseball into my hat. Everyone left the house, it was monday. my brothers went with their friends to go fuck around the city and my mom went to work at the super store down town. I was alone as usual. I dragged myself into the main room and slumped down on the couch. There on the coffee table sat a cupcake and a card. I ripped open the envelope to reveal a sheet of paper that read
"Dear, son
happy 17 birthday. Im going to just give this to you straight. Im sending you off to the military. I cant care for all of you anymore, your stuff is in the duffle bag by the front closet."
I looked over to see my little liege baseball bag by the closet and continued reading.
"This must be hard for you. I know you can take it though. I never loved you enough, I admit it. Your my baby but you where the 8th baby. I had no love left in me. We where poor, and lived in a broken home. We still do. you will be better off alone. Im sorry i couldn't afford to send you to school last year, but you know the way it is. I just want you to know how much I still love you. Im proud of all you've done. From the first time you hit a baseball to your first words, though I probably missed them. A taxi will be here to pick you up in an hour. Make sure to take your bat with you. I put some money and photos in the envelope. good luck sweetie. mommy loves you.
Sincerely,
your mother
I held up the photos, one of me playing my first game, one of me on my 1st birthday, and one of me with all my brothers. one more sat on the table, it was of me and my mom arm in arm. I wanted to cry, how was i supposed to know this morning would be the last morning with her. I knew she never loved me enough, but i loved her enough for the both of us. I rested my head in my hands and tried not to let the tears out but couldn't. I broke down, my life had just hit rock bottom. I brushed my fingers through my hair and cried. "WHY! I LOVED YOU!" I smashed my hands into the walls and my knuckles began to bleed. A car honked out the window and I stopped my rampage to think. "I have to do this, its whats best for the family" so I wrapped up my hands with some medical tape in the bathroom and picked up my bag and bat and left for the car. I rush down the steps while jumping over some hoping I hadn't missed the taxi. I made it just in time. As the car pulled away with me in it I realized that I had left the photos back at the apartment. "STOP THE CAR! I forgot something!" the taxi driver just looked at me and said "sorry kid. Im not stopping shit" I leaned over the seat and looked him dead in the eyes "You better stop this fucking car or so help me." he slammed on the breaks. I sprinted back home to get the photos, when i got there i slowly opened the door and saw my mother kneeling over the photos crying her eyes out. "mom?" She jerked the head at me. "sweetie is that really you?! I though that... that you had left and already forgotten us." I just Ran to her and swung my arms around her. "I will never forget you" we both cried but I had to pull myself off her, I needed to go. She looked away as i left through the door with the photos in hand and her love in my heart. Waved a new Taxi and drove away for what seemed like forever.
Thats when I began to wake up. I could hear the medic trying to talk to me. "scout? are you awake?" I flew out of the bed and stared blankly at the room walls then put my head in my hands and cried heavily. I couldn't stop the tears, not even if I wanted to. "I miss her so much, She's gone... WHY!" yelled at the medic "who's gone?" I pulled the IV out of my arm and ran to my room as fast as I could. Trowing things out of my colset and screaming "WHERE IS IT!" I stopped dead silent for there in the back of my closet was a duffle bag and a bat. I picked up the bat and rolled it I'm hands and remembered when she used to cheer me on at my games. I went through my bag and found the photos. I stared into them and lived the memories once more. the scraped knees, the games and cried some of the sweetest tears a boy could. I love you mom. And I pray every night that your safe.
PART 2...
I backup into a cot and sit in it. I hunch my body over and look down at my feet "I have to pull myself together!" God, I was falling apart.
What more was there to cry about, I left my family and life behind to participate in an endless war. I had thrown my life away and only just realized that the biggest mistake of my was life leaving her behind. I was starting to cry again but slapped myself in the face until I was raw. I felt pathetic, the world was deliberately trying to break me. you know, for laughs. " I FUCKING HATE THIS BULLSHIT!"
I was kicking things all over the room, smashing lamps and tossing boxes when my roommate solider walks in "What the fu..." A box was inches from smashing his skull in. "what in gods name are you doing, why aren't you out there with us! We need you out there!"
I just hung my head in shame and embarrassment "yes sir..." he just nodded "good man" and walked out. I got my shoes back on, fit my headset over my hat and stopped for a moment. I was not carrying my usual tin bat, i was holding my wooden bat. I looked over the long shape of my bat, It read in big read letters on the side, SandMan. I inhaled deeply " Im winning this fight for you" and lightly ran out into battle. I was Screaming my heart out and crashing into the dusty atmosphere. "THIS ONES FOR MY FIRST KISS" I smashed in the blue snipers face. He looked up at me with his bloody face right before he passed out. " AND THIS IS FOR MY MOTHER!" My bat swung brutally into a blue spy's gut (Im sorry about this part, I know technically it was a red spy with scouts mom but the scout in my story is red, so it would make no sense for a red team player to hurt another red, so he is blue for now). as he fell to the ground I jumped high into the air and dropped a full body swing into the back of his head. There I was racing around the battlefield, smashing my blood stained bat against the enemy crowd when the intercom buzzed on "Attention all red players, Blue has called in full retreat. you have claimed victory! see you in two days for our next battle. bzzzt" Everyone was celebrating like crazing, throwing hats into the air and shooting wildly at the sky.
It was a good day for all of us, I was proud of myself and proud of my friends who helped in combat. We lost no lives that day, so we took time to go visit old warriors that fought along side us that are no longer. I got back to my room, solider was at a party with the rest but I I was exhausted so I just decided to go to bed and sleep in peace for once. As i began to drift off I was beginning to feel very sad, frightened and helpless. My eyes opened and I was in my room with my two of my older brothers huddled with me. I remember this memory, it was when my father left us. I never wanted to re live this nightmare but my mind is its own puppet master. No matter how hard I fought the dream it never went away, it was plastered to my mind. All I could hear where Enraged screams from the kitchen. I was just 5 years old. screams of pain and fear drilled into my mind. I don't have to hide anything, he was beating her. The fucking bastard was beating my mother. I seeing her the next day. she had bruises all over her face and body. Her arms had gaping flesh wounds all over them. My oldest brother called the police but he had already left the city and was never heard from since. She was never the same again.
When I got myself to finally wake up the sounds of her screams and crying where still ringing in my ears. That traumatic memory was my
worst nightmare.I had thought after all these years that it was gone but who was I to think such unlikely thoughts. I couldn't take it anymore, I was sick of life. I eyed a pistol sitting on the table, it was calling me. With angry tears in my eyes and frantic hands I grasped it in my palm. My entire body shaking from my head to the floor retaliating my choice. I held it slowly up the my head and set my finger to the trigger. A million things flew through my head, a devil and angel sat on my shoulders. "she loved you! don't do this!" while another argued "she never loved you, she was never there for you! SHE NEVER LOVED YOU!" As my finger was being pressed onto the trigger a voice yelled from the door "NO!" the voice sounded familiar."m...mom? is that you?!" "SCOUT ITS ME! PUT IT DOWN! I LOVE YOU! don't do this to yourself... don't... do this to me." I looked over my shoulder and saw her grieving face looking into my eyes. I lowered the gun and ran into her arms. "I came back to see you again." she said in between her crying breaths. "I knew you would come some day. I just knew it"
THE END