A/N: Reposted, as my old account was frozen.

A monthly challenge fic for Yuki-obsidian. We agreed to both write about Seed and Culgan's death scene from the end of Suikoden 2 from a different characters POV. I chose Culgan.So, here it is- my take on what Culgan may have been thinking after he was defeated by the Highland Army.

WARNINGS: yaoi, angst, death, and lots of sappiness.

I don't own 'em, but please review anyways!!

So this was what it felt like to finally lose. Culgan stared desolately at the high ceiling and sighed. Even after the others had defeated him, he was still losing. He couldn't seem to keep his eyes open, his lungs breathing. His heart didn't seem to have the will to beat anymore. His body was as still and lifeless as the corpse he knew it would soon become, despite his desperate desire to do anything -but- lie still.

They were storming his castle, hunting down his leader, and all he could do was lie there and listen to them, as he slowly died.

It surprised him that he had fallen so easily. He was a trained soldier- a commander, and yet the rebels had dropped him with such minimal effort. It was almost an insult...

What didn't surprise him, though, was which single word it was that just wouldn't leave his mind, even as he felt the rest of the world dropping away.

Seed.

Of the thousands of memories that could have accompanied him is his final moments, Culgan was comforted to see a young, confident 16 year old redhead smiling playfully at him with that taunting smile when he closed his eyes. In his mind, he reached his hand out to catch that elusive teen that had teased and flirted with him throughout their teenage years before finally showing Culgan the kindness of his company when they reached adulthood. The hallucination winked and effortlessly dodged his seeking hand.

"Nice try, Culgan, but I won't let it be that easy."

"Seed..." His voice was filled with such a desperate longing and need that, behind him, a shadowy figure paused in the doorway and looked back a moment, sadly, before straightening it's shoulders with determination and continuing on, pursuing the man Culgan had sworn to protect.

Everything around him was falling apart; falling away. This was the end- he could feel it. Or rather, he knew it was the end because he couldn't feel -anything- anymore. His body was like a dead weight, slowly pulling him away from consciousness, despite how hard he was trying to hold onto the life he had fought so hard for. His life with Seed.

He knew if he turned his head slightly to the side, he would be able to see his counterpart lying in a mirrored state of defeated disgrace only a few feet from him. If he found the strength to reach his arm out, could he touch that smooth, flawless face once more? Would he want to? Seed's breath had sounded ragged and pained moments before, but now the other man was silent... deathly silent. Culgan was glad the redhead was beyond his reach- he couldn't bare to see his lover dead. The thought alone was already killing him.

Even with his eyes closed, the tears managed to find a way to trail in soft rivulets down his strong cheek bones and drip to the floor. "Seed," he murmurred, his voice catching tearfully and growing hoarse as he tried to keep down the sobs rising up and trying to escape from his tight throat. "Seed..."

His world was fading faster and faster, and Culgan accepted his fate with a unexpected sense of relief. With his dead lover beside him, he closed his eyes against the darkening room, and focussed what strength he had left on that one precious memory that had carried him through all his hard times before, and he trusted to carry him through this- his last time.

Behind his heavy eyelids, a young redhead turned and wink at the silver-haired man, then offered him a seductively teasing smile. "Hey, Culgan," Seed's image called in a husky, pubescent voice.

His own voice, only decades younger and uncertainly cautious, answered back. "Yeah?"

"Do you know what I heard today?"

"Heard? No... what did you hear?"

The confident redhead smirked and leaned close. Culgan's dying heart missed a beat as his lover's memory gave him one of those gorgeous, killing smiles that had always reduced the proud soldier to clay in his comrade's hands. "I heard something about you. And me," Seed said slowly, letting Culgan squirm a bit, before adding, "Or maybe it was something about you -liking- me."

The redhead laughed lightly as the silver-haired teen in the dying man's memory began to frantically deny the feelings he was struggling so hard to hide. He gasped, then fell silent as Seed suddenly reached out to stroke his cheek. "Calm down, Culgan. You get too excited," the seductive teen said quietly. "Relax, ok? Who knows... maybe people are saying the same thing about me. And you."

I hope you liked it! Since Culgan died I obviously won't be adding any more chapters, but a prequel might be a possibility, if I feel there's enough interest.