AN: Harry Potter and all things related are not mine... and blahblah... This oneshot fic is set right before the events of Harry Potter and the Philosopher's Stone. I have a bunch of Snape/Sinistra bantering fics that I love and this is one of them.

The Stone is Coming Here

VigilSoul

"Bloody hell," Severus Snape muttered to himself. He was currently sitting alone in the staff room of Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. The room had been occupied not ten minutes ago by the other head house members. A meeting in which the Headmaster had dropped a bombshell on them all.

"Bloody hell," he swore again. That damn Philosopher's Stone was coming here. Here to Hogwarts of all places. Snape sighed heavily and buried his head in his hands. He, as well as MacGonagall, Flitwick, and Sprout had been charged with protecting the ruddy artifact.

Now all he had to do was come up with a plan to keep the stone from reaching the hands of the most evil wizard in the world. No problem. Right? Severus Snape is after all an expert in both Potions and Dark Arts. Surely such an intelligent man and capable wizard could think of something that would keep the damn Stone safe...

'Oh give it a rest,' he thought cynically to himself.

The door creaks open, and Professor Sinistra enters carrying an arm load of notes and lesson plans. Snape feels her pause while taking in his current position. She seats herself across the table from him and spreads her astronomy notes out.

"Trouble Severus?" Sinistra asks with amusement thick in her voice. Snape glares at her between his fingers. 'No you twit, I had the sudden urge to examine my palms in great detail in the middle of the staff room,' he thought bitterly.

He truly hated stupid questions... and stupid people. Not that Sinistra was at all lacking in grey matter. She was just a starry-eyed bat who could at times be easily mistaken for stupid.

"The stone is coming here," Snape replied to Sinistra after removing his hands from his face, and all the while resisting the urge to give her a sharp answer.

"I know," she says simply and quickly turns her attention to her notes.

"Of course you do..." Snape says disbelievingly and rolls his eyes at her. Sinistra grins at his sarcasm. She was probably the only one on the staff who found his biting tongue in the least bit amusing, but then again she was a bit loony.

The staff room became quiet again, the only sound breaking the silence was the scratching sounds of Sinistra's quill and the occasional tap of Snape's finger against the table.

Severus could feel his frustration beginning to build again. He was no closer to a brilliant plan than he had been before Sinistra arrived. It was her fault he couldn't think of anything. She was distracting him, that was it! How could anyone concentrate with all that quill scratching?

'Honestly, it's not as if the stars change all that much, how many damn changes in your lessons must you make!' Severus screamed to himself.

"Dumbledore has asked you to help protect it," Sinistra breaks the silence, "and you don't know what to do yet." Snape glared at her.

How he hated her sometimes. Snape didn't understand how he could be an enigma to everyone else in the bloody world, yet this woman, who had her head in the clouds half the time, could read him like a book. 'It's not right.'

"And I suppose you have a suggestion?" Snape snarls at her.

"No," she remarks through a grin, "but every riddle has an answer. It'll come to you eventually." Snape shakes his head in disgust. Leave it to Sinistra to say something unbelievably vague and dripping with sickeningly sweet optimism. 'Dumbledore is rubbing off on people.'

Snape snorted at the idea of Sinistra taking after Dumbledore. He could almost imagine Sinistra dressed in brightly colored robes, with a fetish for fuzzy socks, going around offering sweets to everyone, talking with hidden messages in idol conversation...

'Riddle' her words echoed in his head, and fueled an idea that struck him full force. He could protect that bloody stone-from-hell with potions... and dark arts... and tie it all together with one of his riddles! Surely that would be challenging enough for even the greatest wizards. Test their knowledge and quick thinking. It was so simple. So easy. So like Sinistra...

Snape eyed Sinistra suspiciously. Did she word her statement that way on purpose, or was it a coincidence? Glancing up from her work, Sinistra met his eyes for a moment... and winked.

'Bloody hell' he thought as the corners of his mouth curved into what could be considered a grin, 'she really is taking after Dumbledore.'