"Some days I feel broke inside but I won't admit"

Hurt by Christina Aguilera

Pam Sat at her desk playing her fifth game of FreeCell. She sighed loudly, glancing up towards Jim's desk, that was now Ryan's. It had been three months since Jim left, with no goodbye. It had been three months since she found herself giving into passion. Tears formed in her eyes. She rubbed her small belly and shut her eyes tightly trying to not let the tears spill. She was having a baby, Jim's baby, and he didn't even know.

Jim rolled his eyes as the lights dimmed and everyone in the Stamford office began to play Call of Duty. Jim ran a hand through his hair and glanced at his co worker. A smile spread across her face.

"Ready to Die, Halpert?" Karen gleefully replied.

Jim flashed a smile and stood up. He grabbed his bag and tapped her desk softly.

" I think I need to leave, I am not feeling very well." he replied walking to Josh's office, ignoring her frown. Five minutes later Jim was driving to his dark, lonely apartment. Once Jim arrived he grabbed a cold beer and turned on his laptop. He decided today would be the day he swallowed his pride and contacted Pam for the first time in three months.

To: Pam Beesly

From: Jim Halpert

Pam

How are you? How are things in Scranton? I miss everyone, some more then others. Yes I mean Dwight.

Write back soon.

Jim

He hit send before he could chicken out and change his mind. He took a deep breath and let a few tears fall. He missed her so much it hurt. No matter how he tried he could not find a way to stop the pain.

Pam threw water on her face and decided it was time to get back to work. Walking to her desk, Dwight shot her a concerned look and smiled. Pam smiled back. Although Dwight would never admit it, Pam knew he missed Jim as much as he did. Pam thought back to the Monday after casino night, after she ended things with Roy to finally be with Jim.

Pam walked into the office a few minutes late. Her eyes red from crying and her stomach churning from being nervous and excited. She glanced at Jim's desk it was empty. Her heart beat so hard it hurt. Dwight walked to her and pulled her out before anyone could see the tears. Pam didn't have to say anything, Dwight knew by the look in her eyes she was devastated.

"Where's Jim?" Pam asked searching Dwight's eyes. They were glossy with tears.

"He transferred Pam. Jan called and told Michael. Ryan packed his things and took it to him. I am sorry Pam. I thought he would have told you." Dwight whispered.

Pam felt like her throat was closing. She tried to speak but she could only sob. Dwight took her into his arms and hugged her. Pam looked at Dwight and barely could get the words out.

"Dwight, I need to go, please…." Sobs once again escaped.

Dwight nodded and patted her back, " I will tell Michael you are ill, go home Pam, I will handle everything."

Pam Hugged him once more and ran towards the elevators, where the sobs once again consumed her.

Pam sat at her desk and refused to let the tears fall. After that day her and Dwight became close in their own way. She chuckled softly, if anyone asked her if she thought Dwight would become such a good friend, Pam would have laughed in their face, but now it just seemed natural. It was funny that only three people knew of her pregnancy. Her Mom, sister and Dwight. It was nice to be able to have someone at work to talk to. Deep down Pam wished it was Jim she had to talk to but that was impossible now. He had moved on.

She shook her head and started reading her email for any important memos from corporate. She sighed deleting annoying forwards from Michael and an email from Kelly asking if Pam would go clubbing. She was about to reply to Kelly when she saw it. An email from Jim, was she dreaming? She took a deep breath and opened it. A smile spread across her face. He face flush with excitement and worry. After reading the simple email Pam opened up a box and began to reply.

To: Jim Halpert

From: Pam Beesly

Jim

Wow, I am a loss for words. I am doing well, dealing with changes in my life, but it's for the best. I finally enrolled in some art classes. I am finally taking chances on things. It's a good feeling.

We have missed you too. It feels weird not having you around. Even Dwight misses you. ( Don't ever tell him I told you, he might bury me on his beet farm.) Actually it might be hard to believe but Dwight and I have become quite close.

How is Stamford? Are you adjusting Ok?

Love,

Pam

PS: Why didn't you say goodbye?

Pam hit send and started filing. If she didn't keep herself busy she would just become a puddle of tears. She rubbed her belly and wondered when it would ever be the right moment to tell Jim he was going to be a father. She let herself wonder if he would even care.

Be Gentle this is my first Fan fic! .