originally this was going to be a two shot fic but after i finished the first chap i heard Katy Perry's song 'I'm Still Breathing' and i felt i should incorperate it into the story as it fits so well.

Abandon Ship...

Did I get your attention,
'Cause I'm sending all the signs that
the clock is ticking and I'll be giving my two weeks

Pick your favourite shade of black
you'd best prepare a speech

"What happened?!"

"NCIS agent fell off a four story car parking structure. She has broken ribs, a broken leg, and her foot is completely shattered."

"Possible fractured skull, and a stab wound in her waist, it appears she was wearing a six inch knife, the leather case was torn like paper in impact."

"She's not breathing."

"Starting CPR."

"One, two, three, four, five, breathe. One, two, three, four, five, breathe. One, two, three, four, five, breathe."

"We need to get her to O.R."

"…three, four, five, breathe."

"We can't move her until she's breathing."

"…four, five, breathe."

"Where's the oxygen?"

"…two, three, four, five, breathe."

"In the ambulance."

"We need some damn oxygen if we want her alive."

"…breathe!"

"We need to intubate her!"

"Do it."

"…four, five, breath."

"Now!"

"Done."

"Let's go."

* * *

"Oh my God, oh my God!" Abby exclaimed as she ran into the room, "No, no, no, she can't be in hospital! She's too stubborn for hospital! She's like Gibbs! She has to be dragged, drugged, or dying to go see a doctor! Oh God! Is she dying? She can't die! Not after last time! No, no, no, no, no, no! Please don't tell me she's dying!"

Abby looked at Tony expectantly, he looked away, not saying anything. He hadn't said anything since they found her.

"She's not dying Abby." Gibbs said, "She's in surgery."

"Surgery! Gibbs! Why didn't you tell me! I would have come sooner!" Abby started to cry, and Gibbs pulled her into his chest, letting her cry into the crook of his neck.

"Are you here for Agent Day-vid?" Asked a doctor; walking to Tony, Gibbs, Abby, and McGee.

"It's pronounced Da-veed, and she's an Officer."

"Oh, sorry. Well. Ziva has come out of surgery, she's sleeping now. When she landed she broke her leg, and shattered he ankle. Broke some ribs, and managed to be stabbed in the waist."

"Stabbed in the waist?" asked Abby, "How?"

"She seemed to have the knife strapped to her side, on impact the knife cut through its leather sleeve and protruded to stab her side."

"Can we see her?"

"She's sleeping at the moment, if you're quiet and let her rest I'm sure it'll be alright."

Abby grabbed the doctor in a suffocating hug, "Thank you!"

She let go then ran off before the doctor could tell her where Ziva's room is.

"What room?" Asked Gibbs,

"308, down the corridor turn left." Said the doctor, pointing down a corridor the opposite way Abby ran.

Gibbs, McGee and Tony walked wordlessly down the corridor.

"Wait!" Called Abby, as she ran back to them,

They walked to Ziva's room together and when they went in they saw her lying on the white bed, her left leg in a cast all the way to her toes. Her waist stab wound was dressed, being careful of her ribs.

An oxygen mask was over her mouth and nose and her chest moved up and down, her face scrunched, as though in confusion, or more likely, she was in pain.

Tony went and sat down, unable to look at Ziva's injuries. Instead he focused on her left hand. In her sleep, her left thumb caressed her hand, a sign of self comfort.

* * *

When Ziva woke she winced pain. Her eyes filled with tears and slipped down her face.

"What's she doing?"

"I think… I think she's crying."

"In her sleep?"

"She must be awake."

"Ziva are you awake? Can you hear us?"

Ziva nodded as she cried. "To-o-o-ee." She winced,

Maybe I was too pale
maybe I was too fat
maybe you had better
Better luck in the sack

"What's she saying?"

"To-o-o-ee!"

"Ziva what are you saying?"

"To-o-o-ee!"

"I think she's saying 'Tony'."

Ziva nodded again.

"Tony's here Ziva."

"To-toe-nee."

"Tony!" Exclaimed Abby glaring at the ever silent agent.

No formal education
And I swore way too much
but I swear you didn't care
'Cause we were in love

"Get a doctor Abby." said Tony, speaking at last, "I'm here Ziva, shhh, just breathe through it." He held her hand, giving it a reassuring squeeze.

A doctor and Abby walked into the room, the doctor pressed a button and looked down at Ziva, and he pulled the mask off her face.

"Try and relax Ziva, it'll be over in a minute, I've given you some morphine."

Ziva nodded, "Tony." She whispered,

"Zee."

"Ziva don't scare us like this!" exclaimed Abby, "Do have any idea how painful it is to hear 'Ziva fell off a building' over the phone!"

"Do you have any idea how much it hurts to be the one that fell off the building?" Asked Tony,

"What I wanna know." Said McGee, "Is where Stevens went. Obviously he was on the top with Ziva, but where'd he go?"

"You didn't catch him!?" Abby half screamed,

"Abby be quiet."

"Sorry." Muttered Abby; before whisper yelling, "You didn't catch him?!"

"No." Grumbled Gibbs, a glare on his face,

"We all separated to different floors, McGee on ground, me second, Gibbs third, Ziva forth."

"We didn't have a chance to look properly when there was the whistling sound." Said McGee,

"Then this horrible crack." Shivered Tony,

"Scariest thing I've seen; that split second I saw Ziva in the air." Whispered McGee,

"One of the worst." Agreed Gibbs,

"And none of you got him?" Asked Abby,

"We all ran to Ziva." McGee told her, "We were too concerned."

"Ok, then I forgive you for letting him get away." Said Abby,

She turned to Ziva, "Don't worry Ziva; we'll catch the guy that did this to you."

Ziva averted her gaze.

"What?" Asked Abby, "What's wrong?"

Ziva took a deep breathe. She may as well get it over and done with.

"I wasn't pushed… I jumped."

Silence.

"Why?" asked Tony,

"Because I love you Tony, because I can't stop loving you."

"Ziva, I-"

"No. Don't. Just say something funny or sweet, but don't you dare say that you love me!" Yelled Ziva, "Don't insult me by saying it, because I know it isn't true."

"Ziva."

"No Tony. I may still be breathing but I've been dead for years. There is no cure, I'm going down and you can't save me. Just give up now."

"Zee-"

"No Tony. I've shed my last tear, it's for the better. I've closed this chapter of my life and soon I will close the book. Pray for me if you want, beg me if you want, but that's all you'll get."

"I l-"

"DON'T SAY YOU LOVE ME!" Ziva yelled at him tears falling from her eyes, "For years Tony I've been sending messages, I've loved you, but you, you are to obnoxious to see it! I finally convinced myself that we have no chance! I worked out what I must do and you will not ruin it!"

"But-"

"I jumped off a four story car park, why didn't I die! How can I still be alive! Why can't you accept that! Why are you making me suffer?!" She yelled crying, "Why am I still breathing, why am I still breathing?"

END

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