AN: This is an AU story. The oniwabanshuu exists, but underground, and Saitou is a cop, the rest will explain itself out. This story line has been on my mind for two days and I cannot get it out of my head. Blame Vampmistress76, she mused me through to decide to write this. For OH fans I have not quit on that fanfic. It will get finished or I will die TRYING dang it!
Saitou ripped the duct tape a little harsher than actually necessary to seal the box. He'd sealed up the last of the moving boxes, and it hit him like a pound of bricks that he would never return to this place. He stood looking out at the house he'd treasured for so long. The house they had shared in the happiest years of their marriage. Fittingly those memories had become poisoned, twisted, darkening the doors of the once happy ground in Saitou's life. A man's house was his kingdom. She'd destroyed it, and destroyed it with a vengeance. It was fitting that he had to sell it. Even if he had won the battles with her attorneys, he couldn't bear living in the house, remembering all the times he'd shared it with her. It was as if she'd poisoned him, paralyzed him by those four words that still haunted him…
I want a divorce…
He cringed, trying to fight back the tears and pick up the pieces of whatever dignity he had left. She'd ripped him to pieces just by asking. Needless to say his next few months in court had taken his soul. He must have gotten the worst attorney in the history of attorneys, or someone above was out to get him. She'd gotten over half her share of the assets. He could care less about the furniture, the paintings, the car… She'd gotten custody of their son, tsutomu. She'd managed to get the custody on the basis of his other passion, being a police officer. The attorneys had told the judge his father was an alcoholic and pointed out a bunch of mumbo jumbo about his being a cop increasing the possibility of abuse developing. Added with the stress of the divorce as it was. The blow brought him to his knees.
The only person he wanted to abuse was his lying bitch for an ex wife, Tokio. She knew how to hit him where it hurt most. She'd known everything about him. He'd loved her and thus shared everything with her….but she'd always been hesitant…she always held back….and now here he was, throwing his stuff in his old beat up truck, poorer than fuck, while she was living high and dry. Bitch bitch bitch bitch bitch.
Well that wasn't very nice. He couldn't necessarily sink to her level now could he? She'd had her moments. They'd been happy once. Tsutomu was the best thing in his life, probably the only good thing that had come from their marriage. Now he was gone….would Tokio even take care of him properly? Saitou felt his heart clench in fear, anger and loathing. Or had she just wanted the low blow?….Where had he gone wrong?….
NO! He was done moping. He was tired of feeling sorry for himself. He was done. What was done was done and there was nothing that him sitting here reminiscing over the past would do to change that. Picking up the last box, he loaded it into the back of his beat up pick up truck, and headed towards the door. He buckled his seat belt adjusted his rear view mirror.
Goodbye dreams…hope…joy… he whispered.
(a week later)
Saitou awoke with a start as he heard a loud buzzing sound erupt by his ear. Whatever it was it was clattering on the glass coffee table. Nearly knocking over a lamp, he groaned and grabbed for his cell phone while wiping the sleep out of his nearly bloodshot eyes.
"Hello?" He answered it groggily, not appreciating the interruption on the few hours of sleep he'd managed.
"Hajime?" was the sound of his weasel like, conniving, attorney.
"Yes?" Saitou replied, irritated that his attorney of all people had woken him here. He was crashing on the Chief of Police's couch while he searched for an apartment.
"I'm…um…afraid I have some terrible news for you" he stuttered.
Saitou settled himself back on the couch closing his eyes, bracing himself for the news.
"Yes?" He replied, defeated, jaw clenched.
"Remember when we reached the settlement for the division of assets?" His attorney asked.
"Yea…" Saitou said sourly. "She took me for all I had with that settlement" Saitou replied bitterly. He had a feeling where this was going.
"Well she's got her share in the house too" His attorney blurted out quickly.
"WHAT?" Saitou exclaimed jumping to his feet.
"She apparently had a copy of the certificate and since her name was on it too the judge gave and split up a share for her of the house to purchase and establish a new home for Tsutomu"
"BUT it was under MY name!" Saitou snarled. "How can she DO that?" Saitou paced the carpet between the couch and the coffee table.
"Look I'm sorry that this happened, I've done all that I can do-"
"DON'T patronize me you sniveling excuse for a worm! You've done nothing but apologize this entire time I've been in court!" Saitou snapped.
"Look pal, you aren't exactly the easiest client to defend you know, Look at your past, you grew up in an abusive alcoholics home fer Christ sakes, and you're also a cop known for being tough on criminals-"
"You couldn't even defend me when they brought up my alcoholic father being a reason why I couldn't raise my SON!" Saitou bellowed.
"You screwed me on both ends whatever you were defending!"
"I did the best I-"
"I don't want to hear anymore. You're fired" Saitou hung up the phone and rolled over burying his head underneath the couch cushions.
"Well aren't you lively this morning?" Hiko Seijiro, captain of the police department said.
Saitou lifted his head from the couch. Hiko's tone was disgruntled, matching the appearance of his chief.
"I-I'm sorry…I didn't mean to wake you" Saitou apologized to his chief, who stood there in his bed robe.
"It's fine, about time you fired that Attorney of yours." He said smirking.
"You heard?" Saitou asked.
"From upstairs even, however I'm all business at the moment. There are a few apartments you should take a look at. They're low income apartments that are nearly brand new" He replied.
"But the wait list is a year long and going-" Saitou started
"I know that, let me finish" He said, eyes sparkling mischievously. "I pulled some strings. Go look at this one." He said handing Saitou a piece of the newspaper. It was the classified section with a red circle around a particular small ad.
"Sir I-"
"Shuddup and take it Hajime, it's just as well I get you off my couch. The misses don't like it too much, so scat. If you like it, they'll give you a decent amount for it"
"Thank you sir" Saitou bowed his head, overcome for a moment.
"Just get yourself back on yer feet and back in the office, you're probably the only competent officer I have" The chief grumbled.
(later on that day)
Saitou closed the door of his beat up truck, packed with his things. He had, with permission, looked over the apartment. It was a two bedroom one bath, with a living room and full operational kitchen. The only problem he could see occurring was that the bathroom was connected to the master bedroom. In Saitou's eyes though it was too good for words. He headed over to the office to see what had to be done to get it.
A dark haired man sat typing away on a keyboard. He wore thick rimmed glasses and a Hawaiian tourist shirt. Saitou stood and waited for a moment. A moment turned into about ten minutes. Saitou coughed and shuffled his feet.
"In a minute" was the snap of the man, who had to be twenty some odd years old said, with a heavy accent.
Saitou frowned.
"How can I help you?" Came the dull monotoned voice of the man, who now leaned on the counter with his elbow hand on his face.
"I was sent by officer-"
"You Hajime? Saitou Hajime?" He asked, looking at Saitou incredulously.
"Yes I-"
"That apartment's a thousand a month, including water and electricity" He said quickly.
"W-what?" Saitou replied. That was still about 300 more than he could pay and survive living meagerly. That wasn't including groceries and other amenities he'd need to buy.
"You heard me. A thousand a month" the man said shrugging.
"B-but this is low income?"
"Yea and you got hooked up so you pay more for the troubles you've caused in paperwork and other various intricacies to get you squared away. The rent here is based on your salary as well…and you're a cop, it's not like you haven't got cash to spare."
"Not when I'm divorced with child support" Saitou snapped.
The man stopped. "You got a boy or a girl?"
"A boy…his name is Tsutomu…he's 3" Saitou said, his heart clenching painfully.
The man paused. It was obvious his view went to a picture frame on his desk.
"1,000 is the best I can do pal. Take it or leave it…" He said pushing his wide framed glasses up his nose bridge and returning to his typing.
"I can't pay that…."Saitou's yellow eyes dimmed, in a look of complete desperation. How was he going to explain this to the chief. The chief had already mentioned he was a liability with his wife as it was….
The man eyed him for a minute and sighed.
"….Alright look, if you can find a roommate within the next week or so I'll let it slide the fact that you're gonna live in a single parent's apartment and your roommate can make up the difference of what you can't pay….Jesus Christ….Get yourself moved in, I'll call the water and electricity and tell them to turn your stuff on. Here's your paperwork" He said hanging Saitou a huge bulky manilla envelope and shaking his head.
"I appreciate it" Saitou told him gratefully, grabbing the stack. It was time to call the papers.
Misao eyed the papers. She had to get out of her apartment now! She was desperate at this point. She lived in the middle of a drug addicts gang war, and someone had been shot outside her apartment last night. Already they were suspecting her. She was no longer safe here. She did something she normally wouldn't have the pride to do. She picked up her cell phone and dialed his number.
"I'm not staying" She told him firmly.
"Misao we still need you-"
"Forget it." Misao replied. "Someone's been shot. It's too risky. I've found an apartment in the low income, it's with an older man…" Misao mused the last part, hoping he'd get jealous…
"Older man? And that's much safer?" Aoshi exclaimed.
"The rent is only 400 a month…that's better rent than this dump of a place you got for me….but there's one problem"
"And that is?" Aoshi asked.
"He's seeking a male roommate."
"So you're going to stay with some lecherous man, abandon your mission, and because of your pride, refuse to come home?" Aoshi replied, nearly laughing.
"I'm going to put the mission in jeopardy if I stay any longer. They know! They changed the locks last night. I'm doing this. I'm packing my things and heading over to that apartment."
"And what if he refuses you, Mr?"
"It says Hajime, Saitou Hajime on the name" Misao said, reading the ad.
"What was that name again?" Aoshi asked, reaching for pen and paper.
"Hajime, he won't refuse me. Heck he probably won't be able to resist me, knowing old men as I do. Over and Out Taishou sama" Misao said mockingly, hanging up the phone.
Misao had all of her things when she heard her cell ringing. She picked it up.
"Ello?" She answered silkily.
"Misao, cut it with the act, I've changed my mind. Go ahead and try for that apartment."
"Thanks Taishou sama" Misao said mockingly. "Because I sooo needed your approval to be able to THINK on my own."
"Goodbye Misao" Aoshi said hanging up.
"Jerk…." Misao said, closing her flip phone harshly.
Saitou had been there for 5 days. Time was running out. He was sure someone would've answered the ad for a roommate. All of his possessions…not that there were that much, were all unpacked. Saitou couldn't handle another move. He just couldn't. He wouldn't go back to the chief. Hell, he had no where to go if this fell through.
A knock at the door startled him, as he nearly spilt his ramen, the extent of his cooking skill. Setting the bowl down on a beat up coffee table, he opened the door.
"Hello!" A short girl, with seafoam green eyes and a long braid said cheerfully.
Saitou was taken aback. Maybe she was one of those annoying girl scout selling cookies.
"Listen sweetheart, you're really cute and sweet but I'm not interested in cookies or whatever you're selling right now" Saitou told her sweetly, trying to close the door.
"Little….girl?" The girl squeeked, as her fists clenched.
'LOOK pal, I'll have you know I'm 21 years of age, and just because I'm short doesn't make me a little girl and who the hell would sell cookies to a grumpy dirty old man like you!" She snarled, seafoam green turning to jade fire as she snapped at him.
"E-excuse me?" Saitou spluttered, doubtful that he'd heard this little street punk right. Had this slip of a girl just said that to him?
"Do you know who I am?" Saitou asked her, frowning. Who was she?
"You've got some NERVE calling me a little girl, I may be short but I could take you down in a minute buddy" She snapped fists up.
Saitou blinked. Still it didn't sink in.
"You understand that you are threatening a COP, RIGHT?" Saitou said loudly…maybe this kid was drunk, or on some sort of drug. Speak slowly, use small words...as Saitou remembered from training. He grumbled inwardly as he realized he'd have to not only put her through the drug test, but be on patrol in his own new apartment complex. Damned low income bastards!
"OH!" Her tone changed instantly back to the sweet voice he'd heard when she answered the door.
"I'm so sorry sir, I was looking for one Saitou Hajime, I guess I must've gotten lost" She said
"Why are you looking for Hajime?" Saitou asked her, eyebrow arching.
"I found this advertisement in the paper and-"
Saitou closed the door.
"HEY!" the girl cried, and proceeded to pound on the door.
"Listen you grumpy old lecher! You could at least point me in the right direction, that'd be the gentlemanly way of doing things, and you didn't have to be so rude, OPEN up!" She said pounding on the door.
Saitou rolled his eyes, realizing she probably wouldn't go away. Could he afford to be choosy at this point?
"I am Him." Saitou said, opening the door, arms crossed, glaring at the girl.
"Oh…" She said pausing.
Maybe she'd leave now that she realized she'd made a total idiot of herself. He waited as she seemed to process this new information.
"I'M your new roommate!" She said smiling sweetly.
"WHAT!" Saitou nearly lost his footing…she was….a HE?
"Y-you're a GUY?" Saitou spluttered trying very hard not to laugh.
"WHAT! Of course NOT! I'm Makimachi Misao, a girl!" She said irritated.
"Excuse me? I believe you're mistaken. The ad was for a Man…not for you and most certainly not a girl" Saitou told her.
"Well, I highly doubt you would be eating ramen, or wearing such filthy clothes if you knew how to clean, and cook, and do laundry and so forth. It appears to me, Saitou, that you have no other roommate with you, and I can do all of that for you, if you'll let me have your room that's open."
"The room's already been filled" Saitou said, haughtily irritated that she'd noticed his lack of clean clothes.
"Buuuullllshit" She replied, smiling, hands on her hips, akimbo. His eyebrow arched.
"How do you know that?" Saitou asked her.
"Because I can see over your shoulder to the door of the room" Misao replied smiling evily.
"You probably couldn't afford the price" Saitou said shrugging about to close the door. She put her hand between it.
"Name it" She said jade eyes cool and collected. She seemed so serious.
"$700 a month including utilities" Saitou snapped a number, any number to get her away.
"W-WHAT? Your ad said 400 a month!" Misao complained.
"You're a girl, there's a lot more expense, psychologically speaking for my health. Have a good day" Saitou said about to close the door.
"I'LL PAY IT!" Misao cried, trying to pull open the door handle as she tried to plant her heels into the concrete.
"You'll what?" Saitou asked, freezing and letting go of the door. She went flying backwards.
"Wahhhg!' She cried hitting the ground hard.
Saitou was too busy processing her statement to help her to her feet. She'd pay 700 bucks for an apartment?
"Look, you don't understand. I was in a really bad neighborhood, someone was murdered down my street and I need a place where I can be safe and what better place than with a cop to protect me? I can pay 700 a month….Please…give me break, I've got no where else to go" She said getting up.
Seafoam green eyes met amber. They glistened threatening tears.
700 a month….She was annoying most assuredly. She'd drive him crazy, grate on his every nerve, completely infuriate him to every end. But 700 a month….he was as desperate for a roommate as she was to be in a safe apartment. Someone was murdered in her apartment complex? She must've been living at Walker apartments. He'd been working on the gangs drug wars going on. Maybe he could find out some information from her as well. The fact that she had no where to go had absoloutly nothing to do with his decision….or that she was a small girl who looked like she needed to be protected…none what so ever.
"Alright…Do you have your stuff here?" Saitou said reluctantly, opening the door.
"THANK YOU!" She cried, jumping on him, hugging him. Shocked and startled beyond no belief, Saitou pried her iron grip hands off of him, pushing her away.
"Whoops…sorry" Misao said scratching her head, laughing and circling her foot in embarrassment. Saitou rolled his eyes.
"Your stuff?" Saitou asked again, impatiently.
"Oh yea, my stuff is this way, in my car" Misao said leading the way.
It took two hours to get her stuff in. She really didn't have all that much stuff to begin with. She did contribute 2 lazy boy chairs and a nicer tv to the living room, as well as a tall standing lamp. She placed a welcome mat outside, as well as various rugs in the living room and kitchen. Saitou had a microwave already in place, but she had a toaster, and a blender to add as well to the kitchen. Miscellanious plates and cooking ware were within the shelves now. Saitou had various pots and pans, along with his grandparents good silver, something he'd decided not to mention to his attorney or wife. However, cooking was not his strong point. She finished with her room, hanging a few things here and there, and putting up shelves. She had a couple of bookshelves she'd brought with her, and offered to put one in the living room in the corner for whatever they'd need.
"You know," Misao said as she came out of her room. "This really is nice. Particularly with the furniture we have…if we could get a couch in here it'd be-"
"Can't afford one" Saitou replied, as he flipped through channels on the tv.
"Who says we have to afford one…you have a truck right?" Misao asked.
Saitou eyed her. "Yea…"
"Let's go then" Misao replied.
"Where?" Saitou asked wearily.
"Couch shopping. Plus I noticed you don't have groceries, and how am I supposed to cook and clean when there's nothing to cook and clean with?" Misao said simply.
"Look I can't afford anything at this moment, I'll need rent money as soon as possible and I have no money to spend to "decorate" the room" Saitou told her simply. Did everyone think he had money growing out his ears?
"It's alright. I assumed you must be hard up if you were offering this sort of deal here. I budgeted special money for an expense to liven up our apartment. Plus I have money for tons of groceries. How else am I gonna cook?"
"What exactly do you do for a living?" Saitou asked her incredulously.
"I'm a waitress at the Akabeko, down the street. I make amazing money in tips, restaurant pay is actually very good. I also run errands and do miscellaneous things for my grandfather, the owner, when he needs them and he pays me very well for my efforts." She replied with her typical cover story.
"Oh.." Saitou replied. If she wanted to put forth the money…then by all means, the place looked dead.
"Alright" She said "But you have to drive!" Misao said sticking her tongue out.
"Sure" Saitou agreed, if she was going to put forth money into groceries and furniture then the least he could was pay for a tank of gas. She had her checkbook out.
"This is my first down payment" She handed him a check for a thousand dollars.
"W-what it's not this mu-"
"I know, the rent isn't that much but you have to pay a fee to add my name to the apartment." Misao said simply. "That should cover it, if I'm correct?"
"Sure…" Saitou agreed, knowing he'd never be able to do that because technically she wasn't supposed to exist.
"If that's settled, let's go!" She replied excitedly. "What colors do you think would look nice in here with what we've got thus far?"
"Colors?" Saitou asked puzzled. He was never very good at decorating his own home much less an apartment. Tokio had always done that he thought bitterly.
"Colors! What colors do you want in here? I helped design the color scheme at the Akabeko, and pick out furniture, but this is your apartment too and you get a say" She explained.
And suddenly Saitou realized he was in over his head. He tromped to his room, searching for something clean. He ended up settling for a button up shirt and jeans. Hopefully she'd do laundry and he would have clean clothes for work.