I've had this idea for around five years now, and just decided to write it. LOL. Sora, Riku, and Kairi visit the House of Mouse. Everyone greets and welcomes them. To Riku's shock and Sora and Kairi's amusement, Mickey set the young keyblade master up on a blind date!
I do not own Kingdom Hearts or House of Mouse. They belong to Square Enix and Disney respectively.
Sora leaned back in his seat in the gummi ship. As Keyblade Master, Riku was offered keyblade armor and a glider; but, Riku elected to purchase his own Gummi Ship. Sora sighed in boredom. "Are we there yet?"
Riku was getting slightly irritated. They have been flying for three hours, and Sora has asked that question a grand total of six times. "Not. Yet. Stop asking!"
"Sorry! But I'm just so damn bored!" Sora complained. "If you would just let me drive-"
"Sora, I love you like a brother, but I do not trust you with my baby." Riku replied. "I know what happened at Deep Jungle."
"Freaking. Loudmouth. Duck." Sora muttered darkly. He folded his arms and pouted.
"Hey, what are those searchlights?" Kairi spoke up, leaning forward and pointing to a world with search lights waving around.
Sora gasped excitedly. "That's Toontown!"
Riku drove to it, and landed softly in front of a large, bright clubhouse. A big sign reading "House of Mouse" hung over the door. The three friends hopped out and were greeted by a young dog-man with a striking resemblance to Goofy.
"Greetings! May I take your…" Max's eyes widened in amazement. "Holy crap! That's a Gummi Ship!"
"Hi! You must be Max." Sora greeted cheerfully. "I'm Sora. This is my girlfriend Kairi and our best friend Riku."
"So you're Sora." Max looked him up and down. "Nice to finally meet you."
"Nice to finally meet you, too!" Sora exclaimed.
"So, what finally brings you here?" Max asked.
"The king invited us." Sora shrugged.
Max looked puzzled, then he understood. "Okay. Here, he is not known as a king, though. Just so you know."
Sora folded his arms in confusion. Then he just shook his head and changed the subject. "So, you're the valet, huh?"
"Yep!" Max smiled. "Donald's the greeter and my dad is head waiter."
Sora tried hard not to laugh. "Your dad is…head waiter?" Max nodded and Sora chuckled. "I'm having a hard time imagining a kings' captain as a waiter."
Max shrugged. "Hey, I don't blame you. I have a hard time imagining my dad running around fighting bad guys."
"So, what were you doing during all the times your dad was helping Sora and the king?" Kairi wondered.
Max took a deep breath. "Well, let's see…I was mugged, wrongfully accused of murder, got into a car accident with my girlfriend who lost a leg and broke up with me over it over the phone, almost got eaten by a cougar, got kidnapped by Maleficent's group, escaped, survived a bomb explosion, was held hostage inside a mini mart, survived a gas leak, was kidnapped again- this time by Organization XIII- but I escaped again, I had to kill someone in self-defense, almost got my finger cut off, got into another car accident but escaped, almost burning my arm off in the process, and now I have cancer." Sora, Riku, and Kairi just stared in shock and sympathy. Max laughed. "Nah, dudes, just kidding. I just went to school and lived my life as normally as possible."
"Geez. I was gonna say…" Sora chuckled.
Riku held the key to the Gummi Ship out to Max. "You sure you can handle parking this thing?"
"Sure, I can!" Max smiled and took the key. "I was trained to drive any and every vehicle. Trust me, Dude. I got this."
"Okay." Riku shrugged. "Also- do me a favor: if some guys in black coats appear through a corridor of darkness, don't let them inside. Just come get me and/or Sora."
"Sure, dude. No problem." Max replied. He held the door open for the trio.
Sora spotted Donald with his back turned towards them. Smirking, Sora snuck up behind Donald and covered his eyes. "Guess who?"
Donald jumped and pushed his assailant's hands off. "Hey! What's the big idea?" He turned around. "Wak? Sora!" He jumped up and hugged his friend, who hugged back.
"It's good to see you, Donald! It's been too long." Sora said. He put his friend down.
"You said it!" Donald smiled and turned to Riku and Kairi. "Riku, Kairi! You made it, too!"
"Hey, Donald." Kairi greeted.
"Hi." Riku waved slightly.
Donald turned to call his girlfriend over. "Hey, Daisy! Look who's here!"
"Why, Sora!" Daisy walked over, smiling. "Hello! Oh, hi, Riku, Kairi."
"Hi, Daisy. How are you doing?" Sora asked.
"Good! It's Donalds' and my anniversary." Daisy replied. Donald's eyes widened, and he smacked his forehead. He forgot. Daisy turned to her boyfriend. "You forgot, didn't you?"
"Well, I…uh…" Donald looked to Sora, his eyes pleading with him to help him out.
Instead, Sora just smiled. "Well, I'll let you two get to celebrating your anniversary. Come on, guys."
Donald glared after his friend. "And after all I've done for you."
XX
The three friends headed to the show room and met Minnie with PDA in hand. "Oh, Sora! Riku! Kairi! Welcome to the House of Mouse!"
"Hi, Your Majest- I mean, Minnie." Sora greeted.
Minnie turned to Riku. "Everything's all set up. Mickey wanted to talk to you before your date, but, something came up that he had to deal with."
"Um, I don't have a date." Riku said with confusion.
Sora looked at Kairi in horror. "Did we forget to tell him?"
"I thought you already told him!" Kairi hissed angrily.
"Uh…"
"Tell me what?" Riku asked, turning to his friends.
"Well, the king- I mean, Mickey- wanted to set you up on a blind date, so you wouldn't be lonely." Sora admitted.
Riku just stared at the younger boy flabbergasted. "Are you kidding me right now?!"
"Come on, Riku! Give it a chance!" Kairi jumped in. "Who knows? She could be Miss Right."
Riku stammered and shook his head. "But, I'm not dressed for a date! Plus, you know, I smell, and-and...I'm not so great at talking to girls!"
"I'm a girl." Kairi replied, putting a hand to her heart. "I think you do just fine."
Riku exhaled sharply. "Who is this date with?"
"Queen Elsa of Arendelle." Sora replied.
"A queen?!" Riku exclaimed. "Oh. Well, guess I know which world to avoid if this date ends in disaster."
"Apparently, you two have quite a few things in common." Sora shrugged and put his hands behind his head. "Just try it. It's just one tiny date. What's it gonna hurt?"
"Besides, you have experience associating with royalty: King Mickey, Queen Minnie…" Kairi listed.
"Princess Jasmine, Belle, Alice…"
"That…might not be the best example, Sora." Kairi pointed out.
"Oh…" Sora's face fell. "Well…he did apologize for kidnapping them."
Riku nodded. Sure, he made a lot of mistakes with the Princesses of Heart. After defeating Xemnas, Sora and Kairi dragged Riku to the princesses' home worlds so Riku could make amends. It wasn't easy- Rajah nearly mauled Riku, the Beast threw him against a wall, Cinderella's mice friends ran up his pants and scratched and bit him all over, Prince Ferdinand punched him, Prince Phillip nearly sliced his head off, the Lost Boys hogtied him and hung him from a tree, Kairi's father screamed at him for an hour straight and threatened to banish him from Destiny Islands, and Alice's sister repeatedly hit him with a book- but, all in all, he made amends.
"Oh- there's Mickey." Kairi pointed to Mickey walking up to the trio.
"Riku! Sora! Kairi! You made it!" Mickey exclaimed, and chuckled.
"Of course we did!" Sora smiled. "Hi, Your Maj- I mean, Mickey!"
"Hey, Mickey." Riku greeted. "So, what's this about a blind date you're ambushing me with?"
"I just thought you'd be a little left out since most of your friends are paired off." Mickey explained. "It must be a little lonely."
"Mickey, I don't mind being a third, or fifth, or seventh wheel." Riku shrugged. He sighed slowly. He really didn't want to hurt anyone's feelings…or get beheaded for standing a queen up. "All right. Since you guys worked really hard on this, I'll give it a try."
"All right!" Sora smiled and pumped his fist. "And if it does end in disaster, I promise to never set you up on a blind date ever again. And you know how much promises mean to me."
"I'll hold you to that." Riku replied. He turned to Mickey. "Are the three good fairies here? I doubt she'll be impressed if I showed up in my jeans."
"No, they are not. But, the Fairy Godmother is here. She's just as good at making clothes. I'll go get her real quick." He ran off. A few minutes later, the Fairy Godmother appeared.
"My! It's splendid to see you three again!" The Fairy Godmother said, smiling. "Now…I do believe someone is here on their first date?"
"Riku is." Sora spoke up, grinning widely.
"Oh, yes, of course." The Fairy Godmother chuckled and walked over to Riku. "Now, let's see here…" She used her wand to take his measurements. "I got just the thing. Bibbidi bobbidi boo!"
Magic swirled around Riku and changed his outfit to a light grey suit with a coattail. His white shirt had ruffles down the front and at his sleeves, and he wore a pale yellow bowtie. His hair was slicked back, and on his feet were black dress shoes. Sora and Kairi muffled their giggles as Riku glared at them.
"I dressed you in Arendelle attire to make a good first impression." The Fairy Godmother stated.
"Thank you." Riku smiled and nodded.
The Fairy Godmother turned to Sora and Kairi. "Now, you two hurry inside. Cinderella is most anxious to see you again."
"We will!" Sora exclaimed. He took Kairi's hand. "Good luck, Riku!"
"Wait- no sage advice?" Riku asked, a little panicked.
"Just be yourself." Kairi said, shrugging. "Also, don't inhale your food, chug your drink, or burp. Those are major turn-offs. Compliment her, but don't overdo it; be honest, sincere, pull her chair out when she sits down, stand when she does, ask her about herself, her family, her world; and do not under any circumstances order spaghetti or any kind of pasta. Those are the worst foods you can eat on a first date. The slurping, the splashing…"
"Got it." Riku nodded.
"Got it memorized?" Kairi joked.
Riku nodded. "Lea would be proud."
Kairi laughed and let Sora drag her into the showroom. They saw Goofy and smiled. Goofy was waiting a table.
"Hey, Captain!" Sora called to him.
"Be right with you, Sora." Goofy replied. Then, realizing what he said, he turned around. "SORA!" He ran and tackle-hugged his friend.
"Yah!" Sora cried in surprise and hugged him, too. "Oh, I missed you, too."
"Where's Riku? Oh- getting ready for his deaf date?" Goofy smiled and winked.
"Blind date, actually." Sora corrected. "And yes, he is."
"Ah-yuck! Well, I've definitely got the perfect dinner set up for them!" Goofy exclaimed. "We'll start off with soup, salad, garlic bread, and for the main course: spaghetti with meatballs!"
"Oh, um…actually, Goofy, Riku kind of wants something else other than spaghetti…" Sora said as kindly as he possibly could.
"Oh. Gawrsh. What does he want?" Goofy shrugged.
"I'm not sure. He didn't look at the menu." Sora replied.
"Actually, it's probably best if you gave him and the queen menus." Kairi suggested.
"Oh, okay. If you say so." Goofy shrugged.
They turned to see Ariel squealing in excitement and running to hug Sora. "I thought I'd never see you again!"
"Hey, Ariel!" Sora greeted happily. Cinderella, Aurora, and Snow White ran up to hug and kiss him on the cheek. Kairi narrowed her eyes at the princesses.
Genie came up from behind Sora and picked him up in a hug. "Oh, Sora! It's been too long!" He growled playfully and set him down. Aladdin and Jasmine came up to him.
Jasmine hugged Sora. "It's good to see you again, Sora."
"Great to see you guys again, too!" Sora exclaimed. "So, what's new with you guys?"
"Well, Aladdin and I finally got married, and now we're having a baby!" Jasmine exclaimed.
"Wow!" Sora exclaimed again in surprise. "Congratulations!"
"Thanks!"
"Sora!" Hercules ran over and hugged him.
"Ack!" Sora cried in surprise. "Ribs, cracking! Organs…crushing!"
Hercules put Sora down. "Sorry."
Stitch jumped over and chittered in his language excitedly. "Sora!" He tackle hugged him.
"Whoa! Hey, Stitch!" Sora greeted. Stitch licked him, laughed, and scampered off. Dumbo flew down to Sora and hugged him with his ears, and Bambi bounded over to him and rubbed his head against his side. "Hey, guys!"
Tarzan leaped towards him "Sora!"
"Oh, hi, Tarzan!" Sora greeted and started talking slowly. "It's nice to see you again."
Tarzan laughed good-naturedly. "I speak perfect English now."
"Oh. Sorry." Sora replied.
"Why, as I live and breathe! It's Sora!" Jiminy Cricket exclaimed from Pinocchio's shoulder.
"Hi, Jiminy, Pinocchio." Sora greeted.
"Sora! Holy crap, it's you!" Simba bounded over to Sora and tackled him to the ground, playfully.
"AAH!" Sora yelped in surprise. "Hey, Simba! How's your baby?"
"All grown up and married already!" Simba stepped off of Sora and let him up. He jerked his head towards his family. "That's them over there."
"Wow." Sora nodded. He put his hands behind his head. "Man, all of my friends are either getting married, having kids, or both! I didn't think this would happen for at least another three years."
Everyone chuckled. Peter popped up above Sora. "Hi, Sora!"
"Whoa!" Sora jumped back in surprise and chuckled. "Hey, Peter."
"Sora?! Is that you?" Sora turned to see Sam and Quorra.
"Hey, you two!" Sora greeted.
"Sora, my man! What's up?" Mushu asked.
"Uh…" He looked up. "The ceiling…?"
Everyone laughed. Kairi put a hand on his shoulder. "That's slang for 'how's it going?', Sora."
"Oh…it's going good." Sora grinned.
"Sora! Kairi!" Alice ran over to the two and hugged them. "It's splendid to see you again!"
"Hey, Alice!"
Sam gasped, happily. "Wow, I almost didn't recognize you!"
Sora smiled and shrugged. "So, how was your first sunrise, Quorra?"
"More beautiful than I ever could have imagined." Quorra smiled.
"That's good." Sora nodded, and turned to Sam. "Sorry about your dad, by the way."
Sam was confused. "How did you know?"
"Riku told me." Sora replied.
Sam was still confused. "You know Riku?"
"He's my best friend." Sora explained. "He's the overprotective, annoying, big brother I never had."
"Oh…" Sam nodded in understanding. "Thank you for your condolence."
"Sure." Sora smiled.
"How is Riku, by the way?" Sam asked.
"He's good! He's actually here getting ready for a blind date." Sora replied.
"Really? He doesn't seem the type to want to go on a blind date." Sam commented, perplexed.
"Well, it did take some convincing…" Sora shrugged.
"Well, I was gonna say…"
Mickey walked up to the group. "Boy, you sure are popular tonight, Sora."
Sora blushed and rubbed the back of his head. "Well, I wouldn't say 'popular'…"
"Oh, quit being so modeth!" Goofy exclaimed, waving a hand.
"'Modest', Goofy." Mickey corrected.
"That, too!"
Mickey shook his head, smiled, and turned to Sora and Kairi. "I'm afraid we overbooked. There's not enough tables for you two to sit together, so you will be sharing a table with Princess Anna of Arendelle and her boyfriend Kristoff."
"Oh, cool! We'll make new friends!" Sora said, excitedly.
Kairi chuckled at her boyfriend. "Are Princess Anna and Queen Elsa related?"
"They're sisters." Mickey replied.
"Oh! Perfect. We can ask her about Elsa." Kairi said to Sora. "Make sure she's good enough for Riku."
Sora laughed. "Yeah!"
Mickey led them to Anna and Kristoff's table. "Hey, you two."
"Hi, Mickey!" Anna greeted, smiling.
"This is Sora and Kairi. They'll be sharing your table tonight." Mickey replied. "Sora, Kairi, this is Anna and Kristoff."
"Nice to meet you guys!" Sora greeted, smiling. Kairi nodded in agreement. "We're Riku's friends."
"Oh!" Anna said with interest. "So…tell me about this Riku. How old is he? What's he like?"
"What's his foot size?" Kristoff asked half-jokingly.
Anna slugged him and glared at him. "Kristoff!"
Sora was confused. "Um…well, he wears a size ten…"
Kairi was slightly embarrassed. "I think he was talking about a different body part, Sora."
"Oh. Well, then why did you say 'foot'?" Sora wondered.
"Oh, I really wish you hadn't asked that…" Anna muttered.
"Let's just say it's a body part that only boys have." Kristoff winked.
Feeling really uncomfortable, Kairi just leaned over and whispered it to Sora, who blushed a deep red. "Oh…that body part…"
"Let's change the subject!" Anna suggested.
"Great idea!" Kairi said, relieved.
XXX
Elsa took a deep breath as she looked at herself in the bathroom mirror. She could not believe Anna convinced her to do this.
"Come on, Elsa! It's just one little date!" Anna exclaimed. "You are allowed to have fun every once in a while."
Elsa sighed in exasperation. "I don't have complete control over my powers, Anna! What if something goes wrong?"
"Riku is a Keyblade Master. I'm sure he'd be able to deflect whatever you accidentally throw at him." Anna said reassuringly. "Just try it."
"Pedophilia?" Elsa raised an eyebrow.
"He's eighteen. I checked." Anna rolled her eyes.
"Oh, well, that's a relief, at least." Elsa nodded. "All right, fine. But just this once."
"Yay!" Anna squealed and hugged her sister. "And if it doesn't go well, I promise to never set you up on a blind date ever again."
Elsa sighed. 'Well, here goes everything…' She left the bathroom and headed for the showroom.
"Well, hot-cha-cha!" Elsa was stopped in the hallway by a tall, lanky, and leering mouse. "Did it hurt when you fell out of heaven?"
Elsa chuckled politely. "That's flattering. Now, you'll excuse me." She started to walk off, but Mortimer stopped her.
"Hey, wait just a second. You look lonely. Allow me to fix that problem." He chuckled suggestively.
"Uh, no. Thank you, but no. I'm actually on my way to a date, so…"
"So, blow it off!" Mortimer shrugged.
"Didn't you hear the lady?" They turned to see Riku walking around the corner. He glared at the mouse. "She doesn't want to talk to you."
"Hey, this is none of your business!" Mortimer exclaimed arrogantly. "Just who do you think you are?"
Riku smirked, summoned his keyblade, and took a stance. "You really wanna know?" Mortimer's eyes widened in slight fear. Riku continued. "I'm the guy who's gonna blast your testicles off if you don't leave this woman alone." Mortimer gulped, put his hands over his crotch, and ran off, whimpering. Riku smirked, dismissed his keyblade, and turned to Elsa. "Sorry for barging in. I just didn't like the way he was talking to you."
"I didn't like the way he was talking, either." Elsa smiled. "Thank you."
"You're welcome." Riku replied. "I'm Riku."
Elsa was slightly surprised. "I'm Queen Elsa of Arendelle."
Riku was taken aback. "Wait…uh…oh, crap…"
"I think we're blind dates." Elsa replied, chuckling slightly.
"Yeah…heh. What a coincidence." Riku cleared his throat. "Well…shall we?"
"We shall." Elsa took Riku's offered arm and they walked through the showroom to their table. Riku pulled out Elsa's chair and she sat down.
Anna gasped excitedly as she saw her sister and Riku. "Ooh, Riku looks handsome!"
"Elsa looks pretty…" Sora stared at her, mesmerized, until Kairi smacked him upside the head. He jumped. "Uh…uh, but not as beautiful as Kairi."
"Nice recovery." Kristoff commented, slyly.
"Thanks!" Sora grinned widely.
The foursome stared at the couple.
'So it begins…'