WARNING: THIS FIC CONTAINS SLASH! Don't like? Don't read. You have been warned.
DISCLAIMER I do not own anything that you see in this fic that belongs to HP. Nor do I own the lyrics to the song Malchik Gay by t.A.T.u. and just to be on the safe side, I do not own anything you recognize from somewhere else.
You
have no idea how long this fic took me to complete. I started on it
almost three years ago. I kept on getting writers blocks, and I kept
on forgetting about it's existence, but my friend kept on forcing
me to finish it. In fact, I was about to give up on this fic when it
was about 95 done, but she threatened to not update her quizilla
stories until I finished it, so here it is.
Malchik gay, Malchik gay
Malchik, Malchik gay
Malchik gay, Malchik gay
Malchik gay, Malchik gay
Malchik gay, Malchik gay
Malchik gay. Malchik gay
Malchik, Malchik, Malchik
"Sorry about that." he said as he helped me pick up my books.
That was how we met. I was late for class, and in my haste, I didn't really pay attention to where I was going. I ran into him and fell on my butt. But he was apologizing, when it was, in all honesty, my fault.
"No. I'm sorry," I said, looking at the floor. I was too embarrassed to look at himwhoever 'he' was. "I wasn't paying attention to where I was going."
He chuckled softly as he offered a hand to help me up. I gladly took it. That's when I noticed the snake on his house crest. My eyes widened and I took a step back.
He smirked. It wasn't they typical evil Slytherin smirk, but a playful one. "Aw come on, Gryffie. I don't bite," He teased. "Except on Sundays," He added as an afterthought, before snickering, giving my books back, and walking away.
I just stared. I was in love. In love with everything about him. His beautiful black hair, his electric blue eyes, his sexy smirk, his attitude, his personalityeverything! Then, he stopped and turned around.
"What's your name?" he yelled from down the hall.
"It's Ginny!" I yelled back.
"Cute name," he said, giving me a grin that made my knees go weak. "Hey! Aren't you Weasley's sister? Anyway, I'm Blaise! Blaise Zabini! See ya later, Ginny!"
I looked at him with a goofy smile plastered on my face as he went on his way down the hall. He was a Slytherin, and he knew that I was Ron's sister, but he wasn't spiteful towards me. Suddenly, I snapped out of it. Shit! I was late for charms! Dammit! I hurried on my way.
Handsome, tender, soft
Why do you look right through me?
Thinking, no I can't deny my feelings
Growing, strong I tried
To keep believing, dreaming on
And every time I see you I crave more
I want to pull you closer, closer, closer, closer
But you leave me feeling frozen
"Give it back, Malfoy!" I yelled angrily as I reached for my book. Malfoy had held the book above his head where I couldn't reach it. Damn him and his height! He had to be 6'2". That was a lot taller than my 5'6".
"Awww. What's this? Little Weasel can't reach? Poor baby!" Malfoy mock cooed, with his 'better-than-you' smirk plastered on his face while waving the book around.
"I HATE YOU!" I shouted in frustration.
"I assure you the feeling's mutual," He sneered.
I glared at him. Then I did something I never thought I would do to anyone, let alone big bad Malfoy. I stepped on his foot as hard as I could. It must have hurt pretty bad, considering that I was wearing stiletto boots.
"Fuck!" Malfoy cussed, dropping my book and gasping in pain. Then he turned around, and slammed me against the wall, "You bitch!" he growled. "You'll pay! Just watch." He whipped out his wand, and pointed it at me. My eyes widened immediately, and I prepared for the worst.
"Let her go, Dray," said a familiar voice.
Malfoy looked at me angrily and reluctantly let go. "Don't expect to be so lucky next time, Weaslette," he hissed, walking away, but not before glaring angrily in Blaise's direction.
"Sorry about that, Gin," said Blaise before he went after Malfoy with a concerned expression plastered on his handsome features.
Malchik gay, Malchik gay
I can be all you need
Won't you please stay with me?
Malchik gay, Malchik gay
Apologies, might-have-beens
Malchik gay, Malchik gay
Can't erase what I feel
Malchik gay, gay, Malchik gay
"Dray," said Blaise as he approached Draco, who had his back facing him, and placed his hand on his arm. They were in Draco and Blaise's shared room. "Dray please don't get mad at me!" he pleaded desperately.
"What the fuck Blaise!" said Draco angrily as he shrugged Blaise's hand off of him and pivoted, so he was face-to-face with Blaise. "Why?" he asked, his voice full of despair.
"Why, What?" asked Blaise, clearly confused.
"You know what!" snapped Draco, "Why did you stand up for the muggle-loving, blood-traitor Weasley against me? What happened? I thought thatoh screw this!" A pause. "FUCK!" He yelled and turned slamming his fist against the wall, resulting in a bleeding hand, broken bones and bruises. Draco prepared to do it again, but Blaise had caught his arm mid-way and stopped him.
"Stop it, Dray," Blaise said, as Draco tried to pull his forearm out of Blaise's grip, but to no avail.
"Let go!" hissed Draco as he struggled more.
"No! Not if you're just going to hurt yourself," said Blaise sternly, holding Draco's arm firmly.
Draco stopped struggling and laughed sarcastically before sneering, "As if you care! Go fuck that Weasley whore for all I care! While you're at it, jump off a cliff!"
"W-what?" Blaise sputtered, with a wounded expression on his face, the shock of Draco's harsh words causing him to accidentally loosen his grip on Draco, who took the opportunity to pull himself out of Blaise's grasp.
"You heard me!" said Draco, sneering maliciously, although he was dying inside. How could he say such things to his beloved?
"Dray, I--" began Blaise before he was cut off.
"I don't want to hear it!" snapped Draco, "It's obvious that the stupid red headed wench is more important to you than I am. So just fuck off! I really don't have time for this. You're just using me aren't you? You're just messing wit--"
Draco was cut off as Blaise's mouth covered his and he kissed him with such fervour that his lips were starting to bruise. Draco moaned and started to kiss back as Blaise's tongue darted out and ran across his lower lip teasingly. Draco parted his mouth and their tongues met. Blaise ran his hands down Draco's shoulders before they grabbed a fistful of his expensive robes. Draco sighed and ran his hands through Blaise's sleek ebony hair.
Finally, Blaise broke the kiss and gasped for air, as Draco smirked pompously before saying, "You are forgiven."
Malchik gay, Malchik gay, Malchik gay
Malchik, Malchik
I sat at the Gryffindor table the next morning during breakfast, wondering what all the commotion was about. Everyone was whispering and pointing fingers over at the Slytherin table, so I looked over. What I saw broke my heart into a million pieces. I closed my eyes, and took a deep breath. Maybe I was just dreaming, and I'd wake up later to find it all be a lie. I just couldn't accept it. Blaise Zabini, the boy I was head over heels with, was a homosexual. And to top it off, he was with Malfoy?
I stood up shakily and took in a shuddering breath. 'Fuck! Why did it have to be this way?' I thought as I ran out of the Great Hall and back to my room in the Gryffindor Dorms. I flung the doors open when I reached my dormitories and collapsed on my bed. I wanted to obliviate that memory out of my head, but I knew it would be no use. Nothing would change the fact that Blaise and Malfoy were together.
Things just couldn't get any worse or so I thought.
Choking, back motion
I try to keep on hoping for a way
A reason for us both to come in close
I long for you to hold me like a boyfriend does
And though my dream is slowly fading
I want to be the object, object, object, object
Of your passion but it's hopeless
Everytime I saw Blaise, he was with Malfoy. By the end of the week, I had seen them embracing and doting on each other many, many times. Each time I saw them like that, I would feel my heart ache painfully, and I couldn't help but feel more than a little jealous of Malfoy.
Blaise was all I could think about. I just couldn't get him off of my mind. It had gotten so bad, that my grades were starting to slip. In a month, I was barely passing potions and was in need of a tutor. Snape had assigned me one and I was to meet with him or her in the room of requirement at eight o'clock.
After dinner, I headed to the room of requirement to meet with my tutor. There, sprawled lazily on an armchair, was Blaise. I gasped and blurt out what was on my mind without even thinking, "Oh God! You?"
Blaise looked at me, a mixture of confusion and hurt in his eyes, "Is something wrong, Ginny? Did I do something? Is it about what Draco did the other day? I'm sorry. Friends?" he asked.
Oh for the love of Merlin! Friends? No! Fuck no! I want more. I know it's selfish and inconsiderate, but I wanted more from him. I want him to love me. The way a boyfriend loves his girlfriend. I forced a smile.
"Friends," I said. We shook hands.
Malchik gay, Malchik gay
I can be all you need
Won't you please stay with me?
Malchik gay, Malchik gay
Apologies, might-have-beens
Malchik gay, Malchik gay
Can't erase what I feel
Malchik gay, gay, Malchik gay
With Blaise tutoring me, my grades were improving. However, being all alone with him for 3 days a week, two hours each time, was driving me crazy! He was so close, but I couldn't do anything about it. I wanted him, but I couldn't have him. He was a forbidden fruit. There wasn't a single session where I didn't want to just snog him senseless.
I also had to see him around the schoolwith Malfoy! They seemed to be everywhere, touching each other, whispering lovingly into each other's ears, giving each other sweet short kisses or long passionate ones, holding hands and gazing into each other's eyes.
Why couldn't it be me in Malfoy's place? Why couldn't I be the one who Blaise devoted himself to? I would love him just as much as Malfoymaybe even more! I could be his world, everything he would ever needjust like he was to me. But no, I wasn't and I never would be. Even if Blaise and Malfoy broke up, he wouldn't be moving on to me, or any other girl for that matter. It could only be a guy he'd shower his affection on.
I sighed. This was impossible. Although I knew it was nearing curfew, I needed to be somewhere else, so I went to the room of requirement. Anywhere. As long as it was away from here. The dreaded place where Blaise and Malfoy were currently kissing each other, completely oblivious to the lustful stares they were receiving from many of the girls, and some of the guys, in the room. All they saw was each other.
Malchik gay, Malchik gay
I can be all you need
Won't you please stay with me?
Malchik gay, Malchik gay
Apologies, might-have-beens
Malchik gay, Malchik gay
Can't erase what I feel
Malchik gay, gay, Malchik gay
I sat on a large violet armchair in the room of requirement, the reflection of the flickering fire before me reflecting in my electric blue eyes. Draco had always been like the older brother I never had, so how? How did I fall for him? It shouldn't have happened. I remember we were playing quidditch at Malfoy Manor during the summer before his 5th year when it happened.
I wanted to take a break, so I took a seat in the bleachers and allowed my eyes to follow Draco. It was when he caught the snitch that I noticed how beautiful he truly was. His hair wasn't slicked back as usual, and fell into his eyes in a, I noticed for the first time, sexy way. His curled upwards as he smiled—smiled—not smirked…smiled. I'd liked him as more than just a brother ever since, but I felt wrong. Like I was being incestuous.
My train of thought was broken when I heard a sharp gasp near the doorway. I looked up and sneered. It was the little weasel. I was just about to throw an insult at her when I noticed the look in her eyes, and I had to fight to conceal my shock. It was the same look I had always worn after I saw Draco with Blaise. Oooh…looks like the weasel was suffering from unrequited love as well.
"Evening, Weaselette," I intoned, looking at her coolly from my spot on the armchair, "Come on in. Close the door while you're at it."
Ginny looked at me nervously, but closed the door behind her. "Hello, Martin." she said politely, taking a seat on a royal blue armchair that the room had conjured.
"Call me Mizery." I said, I just couldn't stand it when people called me by my last name. They could be referring to anyone in my family. Ginny nodded. "So…who is it?" I asked, getting straight to the point.
Ginny looked at me, shocked, before hastily saying, "I don't know what you're talking about."
I scoffed and rolled my eyes, "You are such a bad liar. Must be a gryff thing. You and your noble shit. Couldn't lie if your life depended on it. I'm getting off topic, so just answer me now. Unless you want your brother to know you've been sneaking out after hours."
A gasp, then, "You wouldn't!"
"Would I?" I sneered, "Just watch me."
"Well…" started Ginny with a sigh, "It's this whole Blaise and Malfoy shit. I'm just jealous. Don't start mocking me for it, 'cause I'm abso-fucking-lutely positive there are more girls out there that are jealous as well…just probably not as much as I am."
I looked at Ginny triumphantly, "Ha! I just KNEW it was boy problems! I take it that it's Blaise that you're mooning over?"
Ginny stared at me with disbelief, "How did you know?"
"That, child, is called common sense." I drawled lazily, "As you see, you referred to Blaise by his first name, and Draco by his surname. That would indicate that Blaise is the one you're so madly in love with."
"So, what are you doing here?" asked Ginny as she pulled her legs up on the armchair.
"Sitting. Don't you have eyes?" I inquired, raising my right brow. "Oh, wait, you do. But obviously, they're not really working so well today, now are they?"
"You know what I mean! Stop playing dumb!" yelled Ginny in frustration, as her ears started to turn a rather adorable shade of red. Damn! Getting the rise out of that girl amused me to no end.
"I have absolutely no idea what you're talking about," I said in a faux-innocent manner as my blood-red lips curled into a smirk.
"Fine," Ginny snapped, as she started to get up, "Then I'll leave."
"Wait!" I called. "I'll tell you. Same reason as you…just over a different person." I sighed as I ran my hand through my straight waist-length black hair. Just look at where my 'bottling everything up' technique got me. Stuck confessing my secret to a Weasley.
"Oh," said Ginny softly as she sat back down, "I see. Care to talk about it?"
For the next two hours, me and Ginny spilled our secrets to each other, and talked about our problems. I had no idea what caused me to do something like this…maybe it was the fire whiskey I had earlier.
Malchik gay, Malchik gay, Malchik gay
Malchik, Malchik
A week had passed since I had my first chat with Mizery, and I had made a decision. I took a deep breath before stepping into the Room of Requirement. Things just had to be this way. It would be the best for the both of us.
"Hey! Ginny girl! How's it going?" a chipper voice greeted me.
"Hi Blaise." I replied, "Um…I have something to tell you."
Blaise cocked his head to one side and told me to continue.
"Um…I…uh…I" I started nervously before I blurt it all out, "I asked Professor Snape to get me another tutor! I can't do this anymore! I can't have you as my tutor! It just has to be this way."
Blaise let out a laugh, "Haha! You got me. So, what did you really have to tell me."
"Blaise, I'm not lying." I said as I bit my lip nervously.
Suddenly, all the warmth in Blaise's eyes were replaced with something so cold, it cut me to the core. I wanted to do nothing more than to take back my words.
"Fine." he said bitingly. "Draco was right about you. Blood-traitor," he hissed, "And to think I actually stood up for you."
Blaise got up and was about to exit the room when I scrambled to the door on my knees and blocked his path.
"Wait!" I said frantically, tears starting to form in my eyes, "Please don't go! Please!"
Blaise looked at me for a few seconds as if debating over whether he should listen to my plea or to just leave anyways. After a moment, he spoke again.
"Explain then." he said, his voice devoid of any emotion.
"I…I just…" I started before the tears I was holding back spilled from my eyes, "I..I like you, Blaise…and…its just that…oh gods…"
Blaise looked at me understandingly before taking me into his arms and whispering, "Its okay. If it makes you feel better, I'm sure that I'd like you back if I was straight."
"So you're not mad?" I choked out through my tears; I didn't want him to hate me.
"No. I'm just a bit surprised." he replied, as he stroked my hair, "You'll get over it and find someone else. Besides, you're like a little sister to me. I could never stay mad at you."
"Thank-you."
"No problem, darling." he cooed.
"So what about the tutoring sessions?" I asked.
"I could talk to Professor Snape and I'll continue tutoring you…if that's what you want, of course."
"I want you to."
"Okay. So that's taken care of. Anything else you want to tell me?"
"Um…Blaise? I have a question."
"Go on."
"Will Malfoy hate me more than he already does if he finds out that I like you?"
"Nah. He doesn't mind you anymore. And unless I like you back, he won't care."
"Oh. Thank God! He's violent!"
Blaise laughed. "Yes, he is isn't he? I should properly introduce you guys some time. I think you'll get along."
"Really? Won't he mind? His family and mine haven't really gotten along for centuries."
"Well then, it's time to give it a try."
Mal'chik gey, Mal'chik gey
Bud' so mnoi ponaglei
Ot styda ne krasnei
Mal'chik gey, Mal'chik gey
Polozhi na druzei
Mal'chik gey, Mal'chik gey
Ot menya (beep)
Mal'chik gey, gey
A week later, Ginny and Mizery sat nervously at Three Broomsticks, waiting for Blaise and Draco to show up. Ginny had managed to convince Mizery to come along, and confess her feelings to Draco, because she might as well get it over with and move on with her life, like Ginny was trying to.
"Oh boy. Oh boy." muttered Ginny, taking deep breaths, and smoothing her sleeve obsessively. "I don't think this is such a good idea." She said, as her face turned pale, "Oh Merlin, help me! Malfoy is going to torture me mercilessly. This is going to be the end of me!"
"Oh, shut it, Gin!" snapped Mizery, "You were the one who suggested it, and dragged me along too! You don't see me complaining! Suck it up, buttercup!" she finished with a roll of her eyes, although she too, was practicing nervous habits, chewing on her lower lip being one.
"Merlin, they're here!" gasped Ginny, her eyes widening. She looked ready to bolt.
"Oh, fuck." groaned Mizery, as she eyes darted back and forth looking for an escape, which was non-existent, as Draco and Blaise had seen Ginny and Mizery, and had no plans of letting them run.
"Hello Darlings." said Blaise in an amused tone as he sat down beside Ginny, pulling Draco beside him.
"Hey, Miz" greeted Draco with familiarity, "Ginny." Acknowledged Draco with a nod of his head, at the prompting of Blaise.
"H-Hello M-Malfoy." stuttered Ginny, fiddling with the hem of her sleeve nervously.
Draco smirked, and opened his mouth to say a witty comment, but before he could do so, he was elbowed in the stomach by Blaise.
Blaise leaned over and growled in Draco's ear, "Play nice, or I won't sleep with you anymore."
Draco closed his mouth, and looked a little displeased that he wouldn't be able to have his fun, but obliged. After, an awkward silence followed, and was finally broken when Mizery spoke.
"Draco, can I talk to you? Alone?" she asked, barely able to keep the nervousness out of her voice.
"Alright." Draco replied, standing up with Mizery as they walked off to another table at the far end of the room.
"What's that all about?" asked Blaise, looking at Ginny curiously.
Ginny sighed, "It really isn't in my place to tell you."
"Come on!" begged Blaise.
"I really shouldn't."
"Oh, please, please, please!" Blaise pleaded persistently.
"Oh…" groaned Ginny, looking torn, "Ugh! Okay, fine!"
Blaise smirked, and Ginny rolled her eyes before telling him about Mizery's feelings towards Draco. When she finished, Blaise smirked and said, rather cockily,
"I knew something was up with her! Well, naturally, I don't blame her. Dray is very good looking indeed."
Ginny sighed, shook her head, and said, "You're a hopeless case."
"I know." replied Blaise, grinning cheekily.
-Meanwhile-
"So," started Draco, "What did you want to talk to me about?"
Mizery took a deep breath, and stated as calmly as she possibly could, "Draco, I have a confession to make."
"Do you now?" asked Draco, raising up his right brow, "Well, do tell."
Mizery started chewing on her lower lip, and wringing her hands nervously, before blurting out, "I like you Draco!"
"Well, darling, I like you too." said Draco smoothly.
Mizery growled in frustration. "No! I don't mean it like that! I 'like' like you! As in 'in love kind' of like!"
Draco looked at the girl that was like a sister to him sadly before responding, "Angel, I'm sorry. You know that I love Blaise, and I don't swing that way anyways. I'm sorry."
Mizery let out a sigh of relief, "So you're not mad at me? You're just sorry that you can't like me back? You're not going to hate me? Nothing of the sort? Are you sure? Fuck, am I dreaming? You're not mad?"
Draco chuckled lightly before responding, "Calm down, Miz. No. I'm not mad, and I'm not going to hate you. It was just a little…unexpected." (A/N: okay! I just HAVE to say this! Go read 'Unexpected' by Dracademented! It's the best DGB you'll ever read! Its my most favouritest fanfic EVER!)
"Thanks." said Mizery, gratefully, "I knew that you wouldn't like me from the beginning. But I just had to let you know, because it would help me get over it faster. And I would feel better about it. Besides, I really didn't like keeping it from you, because I don't like keeping anything from you at all. Honestly, I feel loads better just by telling you."
"I'm glad you feel that way." said Draco with a small smile, which could easily be mistaken as a smirk for those who didn't know him well.
Malchik gay, Malchik gay
I can be all you need
Won't you please stay with me?
Malchik gay, Malchik gay
Apologies, might-have-beens
Malchik gay, Malchik gay
Can't erase what I feel
Malchik gay, gay, Malchik gay
A Year Later
Draco and Blaise had graduated a little less than a year ago. With a little help from Blaise during the Three Broomsticks meeting, Draco and Ginny began to get along, and now regularly owled each other. Despite the fact that they were constantly bickering, they were still very close friends. Even after Draco and Blaise left, Ginny and Mizery still continued to see each other became best friends.
"Ginny?"
"Yea, Miz?"
"Are you really over Blaise?"
"Are you really over Draco?"
"…"
"…"
Malchik gay, Malchik gay, Malchik
Malchik gay, Malchik gay,
Malchik gay, Malchik gay,
Malchik, Malchik, Malchik gay
Blaise Zabini, I still want you…I don't think it'll ever change…
A/N: Please review and tell me what you think.