Disclaimer: I don't own this.
Gandalf was walking through the halls of Hogwarts. He had a rather large piece of butter sitting in the middle of his arse. It was quite painful. Then, all of a sudden, Draco Malfoy popped out of nowhere! It was the Improbability Drive! Draco was a rather large flower, because of the Improbability Drive. He had come out of the bathroom where he had just finished putting a large squash up Arwen's arse. Arwen was very upset. Only Aragorn was allowed to do that.
So she came charging out of the hall, wands a blazing and started to scream: "Elves are wonderful. The provoke wonder. Elves are marvelous. They cause marvels. Elves are fantastic. They create fantasies. Elves are glamorous. They project glamour. Elves are terrific. They beget terror!" And then she fell over and died. This rather upset Aragorn, but he soon shrugged it off and went back to squirrel hunting. Years later, through this pastime he managed to meet his true love. Unfortunately, since it was physically impossible for them to have children, they adopted several elephants and eels, but that is another story, and unfortunately one that the future Minister of Magic ensured was banned from Hogwarts.
But anyway, dear Draco soon shed his petals, and went capering upon his merry little way, which was really just down the hall to the broom closet, where Harry Potter, his eternal enemy cough boyfriend cough, was waiting to drag him into the broom closet and snog him silly.
The unexpectedness of Draco's appearance surprised Gandalf, but not for long. Soon after he went back merrily upon his way. Finally, he reached his destination, that is the Hogwarts kitchen's. He tickled the pair, and ducked inside. The site that caught him, while not suprising, was still very disturbing.
"Frodo, how many times do I have to tell you? Stop fraternizing with Nazgul #4! It's bad for your complexion!" And he stalked out, leaving behind a pouting Frodo and Nazgul, both struggling to pull up there pants.
This site had quite put food out of his mind, so Gandalf countinued down the corridors, to see what other horrible site away from him. 'A hobbit and a nazgul, it's just not right. He could have had that nice little Sam, or Boromir, but no, he goes for someone who hasn't taken a bath since the second age.'
As he rounded to corner he saw...
DA-DA-DUM!
I guess you'll just have to tune in next time to find out just what Gandalf saw! Reviews help to speed up the writing process, really. So please, Review, and I promise I'll update!
-dragongirl