A/N Heyy so this is just a short little one shot I wrote, its not Beta'd so excuse the grammar and spelling, this also epitomizes procrastination. Any one who read CORAJ I will be updating soon its just taking longer than expected bit of writers block but hopefully this will help.

NOW BETA'D ALSO JUST A HEADS UP I COULS POSSIBLY TURN THIS INTO A STORY NO PROMISES THOUGH AND IT WON'T BE RIGHT NOW

Enjoy!

Disclaimer: I own nothing

I'm sat here, all alone in my dorm, again.

We were supposed to spend time together today, but you rang me and told me you couldn't, you were meeting with her again. It always comes down to her, to start with I didn't mind, because I trusted you, I couldn't stop you from spending time with your friends. Now, its changing, you seem to be seeing me less and less and her more and more.

Tanya was Rose's suite mate, we met when we all came to university a couple of months ago; she joined our group of friends fairly quickly, which, considering we've been friends since junior year of high school was strange. It was okay at first, she was nice and we all got along, she got the closet to you though, I didn't like it, but I would have hated myself to become one of those clingy girlfriends. The ones who become paranoid whenever their boyfriends get close to other girls.

I kept telling myself I was being stupid.

You'd never leave me for her.

Then you'd look at me like I was the only one you could see, your world, your everything and I'd be so sure that you loved me. Then you'd go back to her, you laugh with her and give her a smile, a look, that I swore, seemed almost identical to the one you just gave me. We'd make plans to go on dates, just spend time together, then you'd break them. Saying last minute you couldn't make it because you were too busy with class work or you couldn't make that day because you already had plans with her.

I had myself so convinced that I was just being jealous.

Whenever we'd all have lunch together I'd pretend to be okay, I'd put on a smile and join in the conversation when I could, but it was so hard. I hated feeling like I was being walked all over, but I didn't want to be the bitch girlfriend who kept her boyfriend from his friends. I was stuck between a rock and a hard place, so I did nothing. Then, I spoke to Rosalie and Alice, my closest friends in our small group, they told me exactly what I didn't want to hear.

"I honestly wouldn't like it bells." Alice had told me, rubbing my shoulder.

"Even if he doesn't see her that way, he's crossing a line constantly breaking plans to be with her, you may have a responsibility as his girlfriend to let him see his friends, whatever gender, but he also has a responsibility to you, as your boyfriend, to keep his promises, when he makes a plan with you he should follow through." Rose had said.

Alice nodded. "She's right, once is okay, twice, maybe, but the amount of times he's done it now, honey, it's not right." She squeezed my hand.

They were right. And I knew it.

I decided against confronting Tanya herself.

So I confronted you about it the next day.

"Bella, I love you, you know that, I've just been busy." You told me. "There's nothing going on between me and Tanya." You smile at me, gave me that look that makes my heart melt, pressed your lips to mine and I felt that spark again, the spark that made me fall for you in the first place. I just push it all away, willing myself to forget, pretending that if I do it'll all go away.

It doesn't though, of course it doesn't.

Now, I'm sat here alone, for the third time this week, a dress on, my hair and make up done just so, because I so thought that this time you'll come, this time you won't let me down. You'll be there at the door, a stunning smile on your face when you see me. The smile that's reserved for me and me alone, you'll kiss me, it'd be so sweet, you'd tell me how beautiful I look, how much you love me. We wouldn't go any were fancy, we wouldn't need to, each others company being enough, I'd be enough for you.

All I want is to be enough for you.

I can't be strong anymore, I can't pretend everything's okay, with a shaking hand I pick up my Cell phone and dial.

"Alice?" I murmured, my voice hoarse.

"Bella." Her voice was soft, concerned.

"He's done it again, I can't..." I trailed off, I didn't need to say what or who, I knew she knew this day had been coming, she knew exactly what I meant.

"Oh, honey." She whispered.

"I need you."

"I'm coming." She said, no hesitation, no questions asked, I heard a muffled, "Jazz I've got to go" Before the phone went dead. Within five minutes she was here, my door slowly creaked open and Ali and Rose walked in.

"Oh Bella." Alice whispered, jumping on my bed and wrapping her arms around me.

"I'm going to kill him." Rose muttered darkly, I had to laugh at that, Alice looked me up and down, then she took my hand.

"C'mon."

I blinked. "What –"

"Were gonna go out."

"Alice, I…" I shook my head.

"You deserve it Bells, you can't stay around here torturing yourself." She looks me in the eyes, I nod despite myself, I know she's right. "Stand up." She looks me up and down once more and nods, then she reached back and pulled the hair tie out of my hair letting it loose, she smiles. "Perfect, show me what shoes you were going to wear." I pick up the black heels from the bottom of the bed and show them to her, she looks at me sadness flashing across her face. "Heels?"

I shrugged, she knew I hated them. "I just wanted to look nice." I mumbled, I watched as Alice cast a look at Rose who was fuming at the other side of the room. Alice walked over to my wardrobe and pulled out a pair of sparkly flats and put them on the floor in front of me.

"Wear those." I nod and slip them on, she then grab my arm and tugs me out the door. "Now, we are going to have an amazing night out, cocktails on me. Okay?"

"Hell yes!" Rose shouts taking my other arm, I laugh as they tugged my down the street towards the club nearest the dorms. We waited in the queue for around fifteen minutes, flashed our ID's then we were in.

"I'm gonna get the drinks, 3 cosmos me thinks." She grinned and walked off to the bar, Rose grinned at me grabbing my wrist and pulled me onto the dance floor and started swaying her hips, after a minute or two of feeling self conscious I joined in. Letting loose, feeling more free than i had in a while. Alice then came back with the drinks pushing her way through the crowd, passing us a glass each. She held hers up to us.

"To girl's night!" She shouted, we all cheered and clinked our glasses.

"To girls night!" We chorused.

Then I froze.

There you stood, across the dance floor, with her. She was pressed up against you swaying her hips with yours, it was so intimate, I tore my eyes away from you and took a massive swallow of the cocktail. Both Alice and Rose had followed my gaze across the room and had seen everything. Rose was being held back by Alice while I just stood there, my heart pounded in my chest and tears threatened to spill, I felt so numb. Everything seemed like a blur, then Alice gasped and Rose stopped dead. Slowly I turned and my heart shattered.

Your lips were pressed to hers, hands squeezing her hips, I just stood there watching like the hugest idiot in the world, willing you to push her away, tell her she's crazy, tell her you have me. But you don't you pull her closer, holding her flush against you. My chest hurts, but I can't tear my eyes away. It's like I have tunnel vision and its all I can see, my hand goes slack and the glass falls to the floor, smashing.

A hand grabs mine and pulls me away, I hear a muffled. "Rosalie, no, she needs us." Then something to low for me to hear before I was pulled through the crowed and out of the club. My knees buckle and Alice's grabs me before I hit the tarmac.

"Bella!"

Then it all comes pouring out, the tears slid down my cheeks and I sob, my shoulders shaking with the effort.

"We need to get her home."

"Let's take her to mine she's in no state to be alone."

I just want to curl up into a ball and disappear, hurt, humiliation and anger course through me as the images run over and over in my head. The rest of the night is a blur of tears, pain and that image of you on a constant loop in my mind. The next morning you come to Alice's to see me hearing I was here from Jasper, who I'm assuming Alice called this morning. Rosalie answers the door,being the blunt person she is gets straight to the point. You call out to me from the door, but I don't move, I say nothing.

Then I hear it.

"Please." You say. "Give me another chance."

I snap

"You want another chance!" I scream. "I have given you so many chances Edward, so many, but I can't do this anymore, I can't pretend I'm okay, I can't pretend it doesn't kill me inside when I see you with her!" I feel tears forming on my cheeks.

You say nothing except stand there your mouth opening and closing.

"Why didn't you just tell me you didn't want me any more, why did you have to cheat on me, why put me through that? WHY!" I just carry on screaming at you, I can't control it. "Did you sleep with her?" I asked, voice soft, deep down already knowing the answer.

You stay silent.

"Did you!" You look away and whatever was left of my heart breaks, I whimpered. "Why wasn't I enough for you?"

You don't answer.

"Leave!" Rose spat. "You've done enough to her as it is, you scumbag." He backs away as Rose slams the door and runs to me, wrapping me up in her arms and holding me close. Hysterical cries escape my lips, I sob why, why, why over and over again, my head and heart pounding.

There are times it seems to me
I'm sharing you with memories
I feel it in my heart
But I don't show it show it
And then there's times you look at me
As though I'm all that you can see
Those times I don't believe it's right
I now know it

Don't me make me promises
Baby you never did know how to keep them well
I've had the rest of you
Now I want the best of you
It's time for show and tell

Cause you and I
Could lose it all if you've got no more room
No room inside for me in your life
Cause I want it all
Or nothing at all
There's no where left to fall
It's now or never

A/N Hope you liked it, I know the end was a bit sudden, but hey, and as you can see I got the inspiration for this from the song all or nothing by o – t own or west life whatever version you prefer. So it's kind of a song fic I s'pose, but anyway, I hope you liked it.

Lovage

Monstergirl

xx