Why You Shouldn't Listen To Your Friend's Dumb Ideas

by Faptorquest

Nikoli Wutmer, Trinas Wislon, Dannae Semula, and Brerna MKorcle are four trolls who decide to play a game that's similar to one played millions of sweeps ago. Will they survive, or will their session end in failure? Fanventure time! Yeah, I have fantrolls, and they're literally the WORST. Hopefully, you'll like them a lot more than I do.

{A/N: Sorry if there are any mistakes, the file got messed up when I tried to convert it unu}

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A young troll sits in front of his computer. What will the name of thi-

Oh, wait. He already has a name. Sorry 'bout that.

Your name is NIKOLI WUTER and you are extremely bored. Way too bored, to be honest. But let's not get into why you are right now, we have an introduction to do! You are a master of graphic design, creating weird monsters, and hiding your emotions from people who aren't close friends. You also love to program computers, but you're not really good at that.

Your lusus is the most annoying thing you've ever met. His name is Mehygone, and he's a horse. Not just any horse, though, he happens to have eight legs. He also wears a stereotypical cowboy hat all the time, which is really embarrassing in your opinion. Your moirail, Dannae, thinks it's adorable, though.

You're millions of sweeps in the future from when the original twelve trolls complete their session. The tyrannical empress got over thrown, and life was once again created on Alternia, and life on the planet is now a lot more peaceful than it used to be. Highbloods and lowbloods life in peace, and hemoists are almost unheard of. Anyways, getting away from all of that, you are 7.8 sweeps old, making you seventeen human years old, and you have the rare lanyardkind strife specibus. You also happen to be a cerulean blood, but you don't have any powers like the famous Serkets that are frequently referenced in your learning system's history books.

Your trolltag is imperturbableVibest and y(x)u are snarky as hell.

What will you d-

Oh, well, you don't really have a choice as to what you're going to do. Your fuchsia blooded moirail has decided to troll you. What do they want now?

–- gregariousMarimbist [GM] began trolling imperturbableVibest [IV] –-

GM: NIIIIIIIIIIIIIIK!

GM: NIK NIK NIIIIIIIIIK!

IV: (X)h hey Dan.

IV: What d(x) y(x)u want?

GM: OKAY SO

GN: I FOUND THIS GAME CALLED SBARB RIGHT?

IV: G(x) (x)n.

GM: WE SHOU\D TOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOTA/\Y P/AY IT!

IV: First (x)f all, calm the fuck d(x)wn.

GM: Okay!

IV: Sec(x)ndly, what the fuck is a SBARB?

GM: Wha\e, it's this game that's pike the Sims but it affects ree/ \ife!

IV: ...Are you sure that it's safe?

GM: Yeah! It's by Skaia Industries, why wou/dn't it be safe?

Skaia Industries, eh? You know that they've made a few games before, but that was it.

GM: Come ooooon. You gotta convince the otters to play it with us! I already got Brerna on board, but I don't know about Trinas.

Of course she already convince Brerna to go along with it. That brownblood will go along with almost anything that's exciting or fun. His subjug moirail, though, is a completely different story. He's a lot more level headed, and he might take some convincing.

IV: Ugh, fine, but it's y(x)ur fault if we all end up dead.

GM: Great! And trust me, no one's gonna die! uvu

GM: Oh, sea you later, Nik! Glubglub's starting to get hungry again.

–- gregariousMarimbist [GM] ceased trolling imperturbableVibest [IV] –-

Welp, Dan's gone. Ugh. Well, you can't roll your eyes forever, you have a job to do! Thankfully, the purple blood is on. And you've already decided that once Dannae gets back, you'll make a memo so everyone's on the same page. There's no way that this can go wrong.

–- imperturbableVibest [IV] began trolling unimpressedTimpanist [UT] –-

IV: S(x) Dani has an(x)ther idea...

UT: Wo∩derful. Is it goi∩g to be like last time?

IV: (x)f fucking c(x)urse n(x)t. We all almost died, remember?

UI: Yeah, but your moirail is fucki∩g I∩SA∩e.

IV: Yeah yeah, I know. But s(x)me(x)ne has t(x) make sure the next ruler d(x)sn't fuck up t(xx) badly

UI: Well, you got me there.

UI: Anyways, what's the idea?

IV: (X)h yeah

IV: Well there's this game called SBARB

UI: SBARB?

IV: Yeah, d(x)n't ask me why they went with that

IV: Anyways, apparently it's like the Sims but IRL s(x) it has that g(x)ing f(x)r it

UI: Sou∩ds da∩gerous.

UI: Is that all you k∩ow?

IV: Yeah, actually

IV: I'm g(x)nna call an (x)fficial Dicksquad meeting when Dan gets back fr(x)m feeding Glubglub

UI: Aight.

UI: Ugh, sorry, Brerna's trolling me.

UI: Talk to you later, dickface.

IV: Later, grubfucker

-– unimpressedTimpanist [UT] ceased trolling imperturbableVibest [IV] –-

Welp, that job's done. And look, Dannae's back too! Perfect timing. It's time to create another memo that hopefully wont end in shitty memes and viruses like last time. Hopefully. Probably not.

Well, here goes nothing.

–- CURRENT imperturbableVibest [CIV] RIGHT NOW opened a memo –-

CIV: S(x), SBARB

CIV: Dan, can y(x)u fill me and Trinas in (x)n this wh(x)le thing?

–- CURRENT gregariousMarimbist [CGM] RIGHT NOW responded to the memo –-

CGM: Okay, so basically SBARB is this game that the tro\/s in our history books p\ayed!

–- CURRENT unimpressedTimpanist [CUT] RIGHT NOW responded to the memo –-

CUT: So we are goi∩g to die.

CGM: Of course not! We're the on\y tro/\s with an actua/ copy, and there has to be a winning session. So we'\/ survive!

–- CURRENT outgoingRackist [COR] RIGHT NOW responded to the memo –-

COR: ThaT's... actually really smarT

COR: Like ThaT's probably The smarTest Thing you've ever Thought of.

CGM: Thanks!

CGM: Anyways, here's the fi\e!

–- CGM Sent file "SBARB " to COR, CIV, and CUT –-

CGM: I had one of my servants code it so that you can pick your c\ient at the start, and so that GristTorent is already insta/\ed!

CIV: Dan, I'm s(x)rry t(x) say this, but this still seems pretty shady

CIV: I mean, a reality warping game that we haven't already heard (x)f?

CIV: That shit w(x)uld be all (x)ver Grublr by n(x)w

CGM: Wha\e yeah, but

CGM: Shut up.

CGM: ANYRAYS, just down\oad that fi/e and \oad it up!

CGM: Then, we/\ find out who's who's server p/ayer, c\ient p/ayer, and just go with the f/ow!

CUT: And you're sure this is safe?

CGM: Positive!

CIV: Alright, y(x)u heard it. Just d(x) it and lets see if this is legit

Let's get this over with. You click on SBARB, which just got done downloading. The loading screen popped up, which was an ever-changing Spirograph that was oddly enchanting. You look at the loading bar just below it, and it look like this'll take quite a long time to load. Sighing, you lean back in your chair, already regretting this while thing. Oh well, it's too late to go back on it now. Besides, what's the worst thing that could happen?