This is a letter Edward wrote to Bella during his absence from school after their first meeting in biology class. He had time to think about what this mysterious girl might mean to him. How many times have we written letters to our secret lovers and never given them, too many to count. This is the start of a series I am calling love letters chronicles. They will begin to progress through Twilight and Bella will even write a few in return. Most of the letters will be written with the lyrics from the band Paramore in mind, Enjoy and please R&R!!!!

Absent

There has always been something missing in my life. Something I've known I always wanted and was unsure I would ever find. The problem is that something I want I may never have because it has more to do with than just me.

The feelings I have always wanted and longed for is here, and now of course my fate lies in the hands of another. Could she ever accept me for the way I am? For what I am? Despite my willingness to do anything I have to, to get what I want, I can't take her life to satisfy this need.

It's not my decision that decides this fate it will be hers.

This is not something I welcome with comfort because her decision, bares directly to me. Will I be alone forever, for my eternity? Or will she change this life that feels like a sentence.

What is missing from my life is Love, the only thing I long for and want. Everything else is second.

I want to be captivated by the overwhelming feeling of someone so extraordinary they are all I ever think about, all I want to be with for the rest of my life. Someone who completely intoxicates me with their presence and also in their absence. Bella is all these things to me. I can't take my eyes off of her.

She is someone who never leaves my thoughts and I hang off of every moment I spend with her. And most importantly I believe she may feel the same about me as I do her. Someone who wants to share the rest of their life with me, no matter how long that may be.

I didn't think I could ever find it. I didn't think it could ever find me, I didn't think I was deserving of love, but I believe it may be upon me.

What was missing from my life is you, Bella. Since the moment I saw you, you are all I can think about. I can't get you out of my mind. If I slept, you would be the last thing I'd think about and the first thing when I woke. But my nights are sleepless so I think about you all the time and it's killing me, in the non-literal sense of course.

I can only hope that you can some day return these same feelings. I wait with open arms hoping this absence of love is finally over. I just hope the wait is not to long. This time waiting seems unbearable.

Edward

This Heart, it beats, beats for only you. My heart, my heart is yours

-paramore-