AN: DON'T OWN DON'T SUE! LOT'S OF OOC ABOUND, I DON'T CARE IF YOU DON'T LIKE IT, I'M JUST HAVING FUN FOR THE HELL OF IT! YES, IT MIGHT SEEM STUPID BUT THIS JUST POPPED INTO MY MIND IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT AND I JUST COULDN'T GET IT OUT OF MY MIND UNTIL I GOT IT DOWN ON THE SCREEN. I THINK IT MIGHT BE MORE THAN A ONE-SHOT. IT MAY OR MAY NOT. I DUNNO. WE'LL SEE.

How She Feels (Zexion Version)

A Kingdom Hearts Story

Chapter 1:

When You Brought Me Here

Amaterasu was up on top of the Alter of Naught waiting for four member of the Organization that she had called up there. She was severely nervous. She had been in The Castle That Never Was for about a year now and she was having a hard time being there. Even though she had feelings, the men around her did not, and according to them they would never have them. She was so torn between what she felt though.

Each of the four Organization members that she had called up here had saved her ass at least once on the missions they had went on and she had become attached to them quite a bit. The attachment had grown into something more as time had passed and Amaterasu wasn't sure what to do except tell them. But she had no idea how they would act. She didn't even know if they would understand what she was talking about. As she waited for those four Organization members to join her, Amaterasu walked to the edge of the alter.

Looking over the edge of it, she watched all of the lights twinkling below her.

'Goddess what am I going to do...' she thought to herself, 'I don't even know if they will understand what I am telling them. And if they do understand, will they even be able to return what I want to give.'

Just as Amaterasu turned around, Xemnas was seen coming up the last few steps of the alter.

"You wanted to see me, Amaterasu?" he asked, tilting his head in a way that made Amaterasu's heart clench.

His hair glinted in the Kingdom Hearts moonlight, perfect and radiant as molten silver. His sun-set orange eyes glowed like hot coals and sent shivers down her back. His caramel skin looked dark and rich and she wanted to run her hands along it, but she resisted. And his deep voice echoed around them. Amaterasu nodded and smiled.

"Yeah, though there are a couple others that I wanted to talk to as well. So just give it a few more minutes, k?" she smiled.

Turning back around she hoped that he didn't see the light blush that tinged her cheeks. If he did she might be in trouble. A Dark Corridor opened and Saix stepped through. He noticed Xemnas and nodded his head at him.

"Amaterasu, you wished to see me?" he intoned, his voice seemingly unperturbed that he was asked up to the Alter.

"Yes, there are a couple others that I am wanting to talk to and I need them here to do so, so we need to wait." she said without turning around.

She was afraid to turn around. If they saw the look that was on her face right now they would become concerned and she would never be able to get out what she wanted to say. A few seconds later, another Dark Corridor opened and Zexion walked out and at the same time Marluxia was seen walking up the last few steps of the Alter. At the sounds of their boots Amaterasu looked over her shoulder and saw that all four of the men that she wanted to talk to were finally present.

'Okay, you can do this girl, just come out and say what you want to. If they don't know what you are talking about, so what. At least you actually said something, you were able to get your ass up and confess. Unlike your brother, who couldn't confess to the one he loved. You've got this.

They're up here, now just turn around and say it.' Amaterasu coached herself in her head.

Turning around, Amaterasu looked at the four Organization members that she had gathered on The Alter of Naught. Xemnas was standing off to the side, closer to one side of the stairs than anything. Saix was on the other side of the stairs. Zexion had drifted to the middle of the Alter, and Marluxia had started to make his way closer to Amaterasu.

"What seems to be troubling you so much that you have asked all of us up here Ami?" Marluxia asked her, bringing an arm around her shoulders.

A light blush pulled itself up onto her cheeks and she pulled away from Marluxia. Shaking her head, she backed away from him.

"What I wanted to say was...Well actually I. Damn it." she muttered.

"Amaterasu, whatever it is you can tell us. We won't be angry with you. Or has someone hurt you? If someone has hurt you, you need to tell us. We'll make sure they are properly taken care of." Saix said gently, looking up at her with yellow eyes that gleamed with interest.

"No, no one has hurt me. It has to do with you guys. It's...it's just you guys...Ugh, how do I say this..." Amaterasu sighed.

Xemnas stood from where he was sitting and walked over to her. Sliding a finger under her chin, he lifted her face so that she was looking him in the eyes.

"There is nothing you have to worry about. Whatever you have to say, you can say it. No matter what it is nothing will change." he whispered to her.

Amaterasu pulled away from him.

"That's the problem. What I say will change what happens between all of us. Especially between two of us if that someone decides to accept it." she replied shaking her head.

"What do you mean?" asked Zexion.

"You all are very dear to me, and I care about all of you very deeply. All of the Organization, I care about you. But the four of you I care about you the most. But I have recently come to realize, that it's more than friendship that I feel for the four of you. I don't know if you will understand.

Over time I've come to find that I like you as more than friends. When I see each of you all day by day, I find that my heart flutters each time I see you. I can't concentrate when I'm on my missions with you. That's why you've had to save me. I'm distracted by you.

What I'm trying to say is that I feel love for each of you. But I can't decide which one of you that I want to be with. Which is why I'm giving you guys the choice of whether or not you would want to share my heart with me. I'm sorry I sound so stupid I know. But I just had to say something instead of staying quiet.

It was just killing me. If you don't want to do anything about this, we can forget it. But at least tell me that you hear what I'm saying." she said very fast.

Silence settled all around the five of them as they stood upon the Alter. Marluxia pulled himself off the edge of the Alter where he had seated himself and walked over to Amaterasu. Placing a hand on her head he gave her a soft smile.

"We were always friends,but I cannot take our relationship beyond that, my dear. I do enjoy my time with you but unfortunately, I can do no more than that. It still will be nice to spend time with you. Considering that you know so much about plants, just like I do." he smiled down at her.

Amaterasu returned the smile, nodding her head. Reaching up to her head, she took Marluxia's hand in her own, then pulled the man against her in a tight hug. She was always known for giving hugs even though the other members of the Organization never liked them, they put up with them for her sake. Patting Amaterasu's back, Marluxia waited for her to release him. Once she did he turned and opened a Dark Corridor and took his leave.

Xemnas walked over and also put his hand on her head and gave her was passed for a smile. He was never able to smile, though he tried to mimic the facial expression that Amaterasu so often used. But Amaterasu understood what he was trying to do. She smiled in return and reached up for his hand. Knowing what was coming, Xemnas pulled his hand away and nodded his head.

"I believe friendship is best for us too. I'm have never understood emotions myself, and I don't think it would be fair to try and force a relationship when one of us is not really able to show the emotion that is required to have that relationship. So I think it would be best if we remained friends. Do find this acceptable, Amaterasu?" he asked her.

Amaterasu nodded and despite the fact that he tried to pull away, Xemnas was caught up in a hug. A tight one at that. Despite her small size, Amaterasu was quite strong. Releasing Xemnas, Amaterasu stepped back and smiled at him once again. Xemnas nodded his head and opened a Dark Corridor himself and walked through it. There was a scoff from behind Amaterasu and she turned around to see Saix staring at her with annoyed yellow eyes.

"Saix?" she asked timidly.

"I don't understand why everyone has to act so friendly to you. We all have no hearts with which to act friendly or to share with one another to love with. It's utterly absurd, and I don't see why they do it. You are not worth the time. The only reason that I put up with you on the missions is because Xemnas orders me to.

Other than that, I merely just put up with you because I have to. I don't know why you actually think that I would want to share your heart with you." he hissed then turned and walked down the Alters steps and into the Castle.

Amaterasu's blood practically froze in her veins at his words. She gave the man her friendship and when she tried to offer him her heart, he threw it back in her face with a harshness she had never seen before. Dropping to her knees, she lowered her head and tears began to streak down her face and sobs started to wrack her small frame.

"He doesn't deserve you, you understand that now, right?" a voice whispered in her ear.

Amaterasu's head lifted and turned to see Zexion behind her. Pulling away from him, she found him to be kneeling behind her and she turned and almost collapsed into his arms.

"W-why, why did he...I never...I don't understand..." she sobbed out.

Pulling her against him once again, Zexion held her against him gently.

"He knows nothing, and that is all there is to it. He is a fool and he has always been one, and he will always be one. He had a chance to have something so wonderful and beautiful and he has passed it up. I will never let him harm you again. And if he does, he will face my illusions." he whispered to her.

A smile broke on Amaterasu's face despite the tears in her eyes.

"And that is something that no one wants to face,is it?" she laughed.

"Exactly." he replied, "Now let's go. I wish to have you all to myself."

Amaterasu's head shot up and she looked at him with happiness.

"That doesn't mean what I think it means, does it?" she asked, a small smirk gracing her features.

Even though Amaterasu didn't think it possible, a blush made it's way onto Zexion's face. Oh yes, if he wasn't cute before, he definitely was now.

"N-no, I didn't m-mean that..." he began to stutter.

Real laughter began to come from Amaterasu as her body shook from the effort to laugh.

"I'm just kidding Zexion. I just wanted to stop being sad. I don't want to cry or be sad around here, especially if I have you to be happy with." she laughed.

Zexion stood and pulled Amaterasu stood with him. Zexion opened a Corridor and pulled off his coat. Slinging it around her shoulders, he pushed Amaterasu into the Dark Corridor and through it. Amaterasu had made to pull away from the Corridor but before she knew it she was though it and in Zexion's room. Stumbling a few steps, Amaterasu turned and glared at Zexion.

"Ya know, that wasn't nice. I'm not of the Darkness nor do I like those Corridors that you guys use." she hissed at him.

A smirk settled itself onto his face.

"How else was I supposed to get you to my room without having to walk all the way though the Castle. I don't enjoy walking all that distance." he told her.

A smile spread itself across Amaterasu's face. Though she did hate the Corridors of Darkness, she had to admit, taking the long way was a pain, so she would forgive him. Turning away from him, she looked around his room. Bookshelves filled three walls of Zexion's room with a door in one of them which most likely led to a small bathroom, and the other door which led outside of the room. The last wall held his bed and a dresser and a amour which was most likely filled with his clothes.

Amaterasu walked over to the bookshelves and began browsing what books Zexion had.

"What topic interests you the most?" he asked her.

Amaterasu "hmm"ed to herself.

"Not really sure. I read a lot of things. I've read a lot of science-fiction, a little adventure here and there, some humor just for fun, some romance just for the variety, and a few other things. But if I had to pick one, I'd have to say...hmmm...I'd say the adventure was the most fun, so that would be the one I enjoy. You know for the new things that you can find in it." she replied.

Zexion walked over to her and took her arm in his. Gently leading her over to a different section of the bookcases, he swept his arm out.

"Then enjoy all you like. This entire section is adventure. Pick one and read to your hearts content if you desire." he whispered to her.

"Really?" she asked, her eyes gleaming with happiness.

Zexion just nodded his head. Amaterasu just hugged him in pure joy then began to scour the books for one she thought she might enjoy. Finally finding one she thought was good, she pulled it out and made for Zexion's bed, Zexion trailing behind her. Kicking off her shoes, Amaterasu jumped up onto the bed and settled back against the pillows getting ready to enjoy a good read, but Zexion stopped her. Sliding in the bed as well, he slipped behind her and pulled her back against his chest so he could enjoy the book as well.

Amaterasu looked over her shoulder and smiled at him, then opened the book and began to read. The two of them began to read together and enjoyed the book for the rest of the night.

AN: Alright so there is my Zexion version of How She Feels. I wanted to get this out as soon as possible, so I tried to make it good but also a little believable too. I know quite a bit of OOC, but hey this is a romance we are talking about and we are also talking about a NOBODY and the fact that we have NO EMOTIONS that are supposed to be coming from them. So yeah. And the fact that I had Marluxia be a total dick like I had Xemnas be a total dick in Marluxia's version. I'm going to do that in each of them. Basically each of them will have someone being a total dick to Amaterasu. That person is the one who will be giving the couple the most problems (for the most part) about their relationship. So yeah, cya.