AN/ Sooo, this is my first uploaded Klaine fanfic, please criticize and review, but nothing to mean. This takes place in the future, where they don't get together after their break-up. It's obviously based on the F.R.I.E.N.D.S episode 05.15, where Ross and Rachel buys a new couch for Ross. I will maybe make more short fanfics like this one, small scenarios based on F.R.I.E.N.D.S episodes. Anyway, enjoy and review! Will be rated M for the future!/AN
AN2/I f I owned Glee there wouldn't be called Glee but Klaine/AN
'How about this one? 'Blaine asks, nodding to a beige couch.
'It's a nice couch I guess.' Kurt replies. He really has no interest what-so-ever in what couch Blaine buys for his apartment, but Kurt is a good friend and helps him anyway.
'We must try it.' Blaine flops down on the sofa and immediately starts squirming around like some sort of snake in it. He starts making some sort of pleased noises as he finally finds a position that pleases him, and Kurt can tell that the salesman feels just as uncomfortable as himself. Blaine sounds like he's having sex with the couch and now he lies down in it. He starts doing some kind of dry humping to the couch and Kurt is almost trying to sink through the floor.
'Mmhh I don't know. Kurt what do you think?' Blaine says and finally he sits up again. Kurt awkwardly sits down on the couch.
Blaine turns to the salesman ' You see I need a couch that says ''Kids are welcome'', but I also need a couch that says ''Come here to me'', he says in a probably what he thinks is a seductive voice.
'Really? You say that to kids?' Kurt can't help but ask cause Blaine tutor some rich kids in piano on the afternoons but the salesman doesn't know that and Blaine sounds like a child predator. The salesman definitely doesn't know that if you go by any of the looks he gives Blaine.
'What! No no no, I mean, the ''Come here to me'' is for the guys you know' Blaine desperately tries to save the situation and throws in a wink at the poor man. By the looks he has given Kurt during the hours in the store he's gay, but he still looks really uncomfortable and embarrassed.
'Blaine, it's a nice couch but it's can't do magic' Kurt replies and stands up. It's a little mean, and he knows Blaine could have any guy he wanted but after 3 hours of couch-shopping Kurt isn't in the same good mood as he was this morning. Blaine is ridiculously picky about his couch and during the three hours spent at a furniture store they've tried every couch in the whole place. Blaine has found problems with couches that Kurt never even would've considered could be wrong with a couch.
'You know what, I think I'll take it!' Kurt can swear on his scarf collection that he hears the salesman mutter ''thank god'' under his breath, but the desire to go home is too strong for him to say something about it.
'You picked a great couch sir, now just sign here.' Blaine is just about to happily sign his signature when he stops.
'What the hell? The delivery cost almost as much as the couch!'
'What, that's ridiculous, he lives like three blocks away.' Kurt says as he peeks over Blaines shoulder on the paper.
'You know what, we'll just carry it' Blaine says in a determined tone. Kurt just goes and put on his jacket cause come on, Blaine can't be serious. But when he turns around Blaine already holds one end of the couch up in the air and looks at Kurt. Kurt starts laughing, Blaine can't be serious.
'Are you kidding me?' Kurt can't believe this. Blaine is seriously thinking that Kurt will happily carry his couch home.
'Come on Kurt, it's not that heavy, and it's only three blocks, just try it, come on' Blaine does puppy eyes at him, and he know Kurt can't resist that.
Kurt sighs loudly, just to show how wrong Blaine is, and lifts. And oh, okay, he can do. The couch isn't a heavy as it looks.
'See, I told you it would work.' Blaine says happily and starts walking backwards out if the store.
'Have a nice day, I'm sure you two will enjoy the couch.'
'Oh, we're not together.' Kurt quickly says.
'Oh, I apologize. But yeah, something didn't quite add up.' The salesman chuckles. Kurt almost falls backwards when Blaine starts to walk forward again.
'What that supposed to mean?' Blaine says, sounding offended.
'Blaine.' Kurt tries.
'Well, it's… You… Him… He's very, you know' The salesman and smiles at Kurt and his eyes rank along Kurts body. 'And you're a little… you know.' Under different circumstances Kurt would be really flattered, but the holding a couch, and it's heavy and he just want to go home.
'Excuse me, but we used to go out!' Blaine replies in a snarky tone to the salesman.
'Really? You two?'
'Yes, come on Kurt, tell him'
'Blaine, I really don't want to do this right now. This is a heavy couch. And I'm carrying it.' Kurt says and hope that Blaine will just let it go but this is Blaine so of course that doesn't happen.
'Then tell him quickly' Blaine stares at Kurt.
'Fine, we used to go out.' Kurt says and tries to start going forward to the exit of this dammed store. But Blaine is apparently not done yet cause he once again pushes Kurt back into the middle of the store with the couch.
'And, we did it, 298 times!' Kurt can't believe what he's hearing.
'BLAINE! You keept count?! Oh my god, you are such a loser!'
'A loser you did it with 298 times.' Blaine responds cockily and Kurt wishes the ground would swallow him whole. The salesman is looking way to smug for Kurt's liking, so instead of a snappy comeback he just starts walking and pushing Blaine and his stupid couch against the door to leave.
Outside, Kurt stops to look at the name of the store so he can remember never to go there again.