"Mo, just go do it." Kaidan called out as he watched his wife pace back and forth across their bedroom.
"Don't call me that. You know I can't stand it." She replied as she ran her fingers through her lengthening red hair for what must have been the hundredth time.
"Well, love, what do you expect me to call you? Shepard? Last I checked your last name was Alenko and has been for about six months. Besides, your mom calls you Mo with impunity. Why can't I?" He sighed as she continued to pace tugging at one of his old t-shirts that she had slept in the night before. "Besides, that's off topic. You can't keep putting this off. Isn't it better to know?"
She looked at him, her blue eyes fearful and watery. He walked over to her and wrapped his arms around her small thin frame. A small sob escaped her throat as she buried her face against him. Deftly, he gathered her up on his arms and carried her to the bed where she curled up in his lap, small hiccupping sobs racking her body.
Slowly, he slipped his hand under the shirt and began to rub small circles across her back. Eventually, the sobs receded and Moira looked him in the eye.
"I'm afraid, Kaidan. After all my body has been through, I don't even know if it's possible." She looked down at her hands as she remembered the day that tilted her world sideways.
Miranda had walked into her cabin, her normal cool and collected demeanor gone.
"Shepard, we need to talk." The tones in her voice suggested that she had bad news. They had sat down on the small couches in her cabin. Finally, Miranda had spoken.
"I need to tell you something that the Illusive Man doesn't want you to know. But I think you deserve to know everything."
Fears had raced through her mind. What had Cerberus not told her? She already hated feeling beholden to them. Were they going to ask her to bend so far that she would surely break?
"What is it, Miranda?" She had asked, desperate to know the entire truth.
"When we found you after the Collectors destroyed the Normandy…" her voice had faltered. " There was no way to…" Another pause. "You were so badly damaged…"
Frustrated, Shepard had interrupted, "Miranda, get to the point."
"Shepherd, when we found you, you were pregnant. The fetus was already…gone by then. The damage you sustained internally left a lot of scaring. We couldn't fix all of it. I'm sorry but the likelihood that you'll ever get pregnant again is very slim."
She had been stunned into silence. She had been pregnant? That night before Ilos with Kaidan. She had been pregnant with Kaidan's child. Miranda had let herself out while Shepard had fallen to pieces.
She had told Kaidan before the final battle against the Reapers. They had grieved together. And they hadn't worried about her getting pregnant. They had already made plans to adopt a child after being married for a while.
Kaidan finally pulled her out of her memories, kissing her softly, the taste of tears intermingled with their kiss.
"How late are you?" He quietly asked, tracing a rough finger along her jaw.
She looked up at the calendar that sat next to their bed and counted slowly in her head. "Eight, almost nine weeks."
"Why didn't you tell me sooner? Why did you wait until last week to mention anything? And then when I'd ask about it, you'd change the subject."
"Because I didn't want to get my hopes up and you know I haven't exactly been regular since everything." She mumbled not looking into his eyes.
"Well now that you've told me, I want you to go find out. We can answer this question in two seconds." He stood her up and nudged her toward the bathroom. She finally stepped in and the door slid silently behind her. He stared at himself in the mirror while he waited. He wondered what his child would look like. Would they have his brown eyes or her blue eyes? His inky black hair or her fire red? So many questions and hope rose in his mind. He had always wanted to be a father and Moira would be an amazing mother. He thought back on the last few weeks. Moira had been more irritable and she had been sick a few times for unexplained reasons. One night she was making dinner, one of her favorite dishes, tuna noodle casserole, and had to abandon it to stay in the bathroom the rest of the evening. He tried to squash the hope that kept rising inside his chest. All the pieces fit.
He looked at the clock and realized that she had been in the bathroom for ten minutes.
"Moira, you alright in there?" He asked as he knocked on the door. He could hear the soft sounds of her crying. He went to open the door but she had locked the door. "Moira, open the door. Let me in." He could hear her moving around and suddenly the door slid open. He looked up at her. Where he had expected grief to reside was joy. Her red-rimmed eyes were hopeful and a small smile tugged at the corners of her lips.
"Kaidan, you're going to be a father." She proclaimed, laughter bubbling forth from her lips. Picking her up, he swung her around and then laid her on the bed. He kissed her softly trailing kisses down her neck, across her chest. Finally, he pulled the shirt up and placed a kiss on her belly below her navel.
"Hello, little baby. I can't wait to meet you. I love you and your mother very much."