Lost In Love
Post-Endgame
Disclaimer - The Powers That Be (Paramount) are letting me play with them for a while as a birthday present, so please don't sue me, I'm only 14
She stands by her Ready Room windows, an open duffel bag sat on the couch in front of her. She stands with her back to him, the dissapating steam from the cooling coffee cup he knows is in her hands snaking up towards the celing of the darkened room. The ship is in high orbit above Earth and the planet fills the windows. After seven years trying to get home to this planet, many were enticed and rushed from the ship as soon as possible, despite the possibility of arrest for many of the Maquis crew and endless debriefings for the rest of the Starfleet crew.
They are the only ones that haven't left. She disappeared into her Ready Room after the first contact with Starfleet and no one had seen her since. Until everyone had left and he went to find her. He had fallen in love with her when he first saw her over the viewscreen seven years ago, and he had never stopped loving her, but as time passed, he had given up hope that they would ever have a chance together.
He had started dating a week before they had found a way home, not knowing that they return home so soon. He had seen the pain, shock and betrayal in her eyes when he had told her, knowing that to see him dating was painful enough for her, but to see him dating the girl who was like a daughter to her shocked and hurt her beyond belief.
He had seen how she tried to be happy for them, but couldn't, the pain and betrayal always lingering openly behind her strained smile. He had noticed how she drew away from him, making excuses not to meet him for dinner and barely talking to him unless absolutely necessary.
He chewed his lip as he watched her. She hadn't heard him come in, or if she had, she wasn't ready to acknowledge him just yet. She shifted slightly, turning, perhaps unconsciously, towards him so that he could see her part of her face.
Her cheeks were tear-stained and her eyes were red and puffy. She was biting her lower lip hard to stop herself from sobbing as the tears continue to fall and her body trembled with the effort. Blood trickled down her chin from the cut on her lip.
He continued to watch her for a while, but when she sank to her knees and clumsily pushed her coffee mug onto the low coffee table beside her, her shoulders shaking as she started to sob freely, he found himself kneeling down next to her and wrapping his arms around her, rubbing her back and stroking her hair as she curled up in a tight ball against him, clenching his uniform in her hands and sobbing into his shoulder.
He didn't know how long they sat there for, on the floor by the couch in her Ready Room, but when she quietened, he looked down at her to find her sleeping fitfully in her arms, tired and spent, frowning in her sleep and clinging desperately to him, as if he would disappear.
He reached up to the duffel bag with one hand and lifted it onto the floor by his side. He managed to jimmy it close and slipped it over his shoulder before scooping his sleeping Captain into his arms and heading for the Transporter Room, where he programmed the co-ordinates into the console and stepped the Transporter Pad.
As the Voyager Transporter Room disappeared from around them and was replaced by the warm, fading sunlight shade of a forest just outside of the Captain's hometown of Bloomington, Indiana. He set off in the direction that he hoped was Bloomington, grateful that when he arrived, the sun had set and twilight was setting in.
He was guided by light of the moon and the rare shaft of light coming from the gaps in the curtains of the houses that lined the small town's high street. The moon was high in the sky and the air was cold when he reached the edge of town and spotted the small country house that his Captain had so often talked about. The front door was open, and the light from the front room illuminated the shadowy figure that stood waiting on the house's front porch.
He approached slowly, trying not to disturb or surprise the woman he knew was waiting for him, but she looked up when the gravel that made up the driveway crunched under his feet. She pulled the shawl that she wore around her shoulders tighter and stepped down from the porch.
"How is she?" the woman asked quietly.
"Drained. She cried herself to sleep," he whispered, smiling down at the woman curled up asleep in his arms, gently shivering in the cold of the night air. "Let's get her inside, she's shivering."
She woke up to bright sunlight streaming through a gap in a pair of deep blue curtains. She looked around, momentarily confused, before she recognized the room as her bedroom at her mother's home in Indiana. She wondered how she had arrived here, but couldn't remember.
She pushed back the covers and slid into her slippers and dressing gown, wandering out onto the hallway and down the stairs, drawn to the kitchen by the smell of cooking. She pushed open the door and grabbed the doorframe in shock as she felt her legs go weak: sat at the table with a mug of coffee and a plate of her mother's cooking, was Chakotay. He turned and flashed her a dimpled smile when he heard her startled gasp, and his smile grew when she managed to return his grin with a rather shocked smile.
"Katie! Welcome to the waking world!" her mother, Gretchen, cried merrily, enveloping her in a warm hug before pushing her into a chair beside Chakotay and placing a plate of food and mug of coffee on the table in front of her. She smiled and started to pick at the food on her plate when a large, shaggy haired dog padded in through the back door and started to nuzzle at her. She smiled and fondled his ears.
"I like it here. It's pretty and it reminds me of home." She smiled as he ran up beside her.
They walked in silence through the woods for a while, Trixie sniffing through the autumn leaves on the track ahead of them. The wind was refreshing and the sun was high in the sky, and she soon slipped her hand into his as they approached a clearing. He squeezed it and pulled her close, removing his hand from hers to wrap it around her. She melted into his embrace, and together they settled down on a bench on the edge of the clearing.
"I'm sorry, Kathryn," he murmured in her ear. Her grip on his hand tightened, she bit her lip and looked down. "I didn't mean for it to be like this, I never meant to hurt you, it's the last thing I would want to do, you know that . . ." she nodded. "It was a mistake, I know, but when I found Seven's hologram, I couldn't not help her, she was so confused and just wanted to learn. I couldn't not help her, but if I'd known I'd hurt you this badly, I'd've asked someone else to help her learn the ways of the human race . . ." he trailed off sadly, ashamed. He stroked Trixie's head when she laid it on his knee.
Kathryn snuggled against him, resting her head against his shoulder. "I'm sorry too, I shouldn't have pushed you away." she whispered. He stroked her hair.
"You had every right too, I should've told you there was really nothing between us, because by trying to help one friend, I ignored another and that's the last thing I would want to do to anyone, especially someone as special to me as you . . ." Kathryn wrapped her arms around him and leaned into his as Trixie jumped onto the bench beside her and curled up next to her.
The Starfleet debriefings began the next week, and lasted twenty-eight days. When they finished, Kathryn and Chakotay both resigned their commissions, moved into Gretchen's house in Bloomington, and were soon engaged,
"Katie, stand still and stop fidgeting, you're making it worse. I can't do it properly if you don't stand still," moaned her sister Phoebe as she tried to fix the hairpiece into Kathryn's hair.
"I can't stand still, I'm too nervous. What if something goes wrong?"
"Nothing will go wrong, sweetie, you love him and he loves you, it doesn't take a scientist to see that. You'll be fine," said Gretchen as she fiddled with the zipper on the back of Kathryn's dress. Kathryn shivered, and bit her lip.
Pheobe finished fiddeling with the hairpiece and stepped back as Gretchen finished with the zipper on the back of the dress. Kathryn was nervously twisting her hands together as her hair fell loosle over her bare shoulders.
The tent flap was pushed back and Will Riker stepped through in a white dress uniform, with Seven of Nine, B'Elanna Torres-Paris and Naomi Wildman in light sapphire-blue bridesmaids dresses.
"Captain, you look . . . stunning," managed B'Elanna, stunned by the sight of her former Captain in a long, pale, moonstone-white-and-blue wedding dress with a white-and-blue rosebud hairpiece holding her long auburn-red hair back from her pale face.
"Call me Kathryn, B'Elanna, please," Kathryn managed to stammer nervously. B'Elanna smiled reassuringly, and reached out to squeeze Kathryn's hand, sensing her nervousness. Naomi wrapped her arms around her 'Aunt' Kathryn's waist. Kathryn stroked her hair.
"So Kathryn, are you ready?" Will Riker asked. She looked at her feet and nodded slowly. He held out his arm and she took it, Seven, B'Elanna and Naomi falling into step behind them, Trixie trotting along at Kathryn's side. Gretchen and Pheobe had slipped off to the ceremony ahead of Kathryn, her dog, Will Riker and the three bridesmaids.
The ceremony was to be held in a small clearing in the forest a few a miles from Bloomington. The tent had been just round the corner from the clearing, and it took only a few minutes for the bride, her escort and bridesmaids to walk from the tent, along the dirt track and round the corner into the clearing, where a small panpipe and woodland band began to play, the birds in the trees singing in time with them
The crowds turned and stood for them as they walked down the aisle. On one side, there was the former crew of Voyager and a few members of the Titan and Enterprise crews. On the other side were Kathryn's friends, family and neighbours, and Bloomington locals, many of which had known Kathryn since she was a little girl, and where glad to see her so happy and in love.
Chakotay stood in front of the alter, behind which stood Admiral Owen Paris. His son, Tom Paris, Chakotay's best man, stood to the left of the alter, with Tuvok stood smartly next to him, all of them in white dress uniforms.
Chakotay smiled at her, and Kathryn felt her knees go weak and heart heart flutter in excitement, anticipation, love and nerves. She smiled at him, and her eyes misted over slightly. The walk along the aisle seemed to take all too long, but relief washed over her in waves when she took her place by his side, her hand in his, her eyes gazing into his.
Admiral Paris performed the ceremony and they spoke their vows. When Admiral Paris pronounced them man and wife, Chakotay's arms snaked around her waist and hers slipped around his neck as he leaned down to press his lips to hers. Cheers erupted from the crowds as she moaned against his lips and the kiss deepened.
They eventually broke apart for air, and she smiled up at him. "I love you."