1: Input

Of course it had to be Owen who ended up on the retrieval with Ianto.

Gwen was meeting with the Cardiff police about an upswing in drunk and disorderly calls around the bay. Andy Davidson had called thinking it was obviously a Torchwood case, until Ianto had pointed out after she'd left that the recent success of the Cardiff rugby team was more likely the problem. Tosh was knee deep in computer code, barely stopping when the Rift alarm went off and literally sending the information over to Ianto's computer without looking up. And since Jack was in his office, feet on the desk, phone hanging from his ear as he twirled a pencil and pulled faces at whatever government bureaucrat was talking his ear off, Ianto was forced to pull Owen from his latest attempt to break the Space Invaders record Tosh had set and drag him out to Grangemoor Park to pick up whatever had fallen through the Rift this time.

They spent the short drive sniping at one another, albeit in a friendly sort of way. Ianto had always tried to give as good as he got, and after Jack had left, Owen had backed off from the crueler edge of his words. Most of the time it was more a game than any real attempt to hurt or offend. After traipsing around the wet grass—and Ianto had to agree with Owen's grumbling this time, it was muddy and miserable and he'd need to dry, brush, and polish his new patent leathers—they finally found a small metal gadget that looked more like an old Bop It game than advanced alien tech. It scanned as harmless, and Owen, being Owen, tried bopping it. It might have made a half-hearted bloop sound; Ianto grabbed it and threw it in the containment box with a roll of his eyes.

It was as they were driving back to the Hub that Ianto first suspected something might not be right. Owen turned on the radio and started slapping his knee to INXS. Which was always annoying, but Ianto could swear he felt it on his own leg and snapped at Owen to stop. The doctor grinned and turned up the music; Ianto blamed the suspension and made a mental note to take the SUV to the shop.

They decided to pick up coffee and a late lunch. Stopping first for drinks, Ianto felt the sharp burn of a hot cappuccino on the roof of his mouth as they left the shop, and glanced up to find Owen lowering his cup and wincing. Ianto hadn't touched his own drink yet, and he frowned as they walked across the street to pick up pizza. For the last month Tosh and Gwen had been trying to get them to eat healthier, but it was Friday, and Owen and Ianto had insisted that Fridays were technically the weekend so "we can eat whatever we want." The box was hot and greasy, and Ianto almost dropped it. Biting back a curse, he glanced up in surprise when Owen dropped the car keys, shook his hand, and swore.

Ianto set the box on the floor in the backseat of the SUV and stood, narrowing his eyes as a horrible and ridiculous thought occurred to him. On a hunch, he pinched his arm; Owen went "Ow!" as he rubbed at same spot. Ianto pulled at his ear, and Owen swiped at an invisible assailant. Taking a deep breath, Ianto kicked the side of the SUV and sighed when Owen grabbed his foot and let out a stream of curse words worthy of the latest Quentin Tarantino film.

"I think we have a problem," Ianto announced. Owen grumbled under his breath.

"Yeah, something invisible is attacking me," he muttered, eyes slightly wild as he glanced around. "Did you feel anything?"

"Yes," Ianto nodded. "Because it was me."

"What?" asked Owen. "You're invisible or you're attacking me?"

"Neither. Get in," Ianto replied, and he climbed into the passenger door and waited for Owen to join him. "Watch." He pinched his nose, and Owen's hand flew to his face, his eyes wide and questioning. Ianto nodded again.

"No way," Owen replied. He flicked a finger against his cheek; it stung, and Ianto instinctively flinched.

"Are you seriously suggesting that I can feel everything you feel, and vice versa?" Owen asked; Ianto was fairly certain the doctor's voice was at least half an octave higher.

"It would appear so," Ianto replied dryly. "Two guesses what caused it?"

Owen groaned and let his head hit the steering wheel. Ianto let out an involuntary 'oof.' "You've got to be kidding me," the doctor muttered.

"There's a reason we don't play with alien tech like they're toys from the nineties," Ianto replied. "It's obviously not an intergalactic hand game."

"What is it, then?" asked Owen, starting the car. "And what do we do about it?"

Ianto sighed and let his head fall back, vaguely noticing that Owen flinched. "We take it to Tosh, of course. She'll figure it out."

Gwen had returned by the time Owen and Ianto walked into the Hub, bickering as usual. Ianto had a pizza box that he dumped unceremoniously on the sofa table before following Owen toward Tosh's desk. She glanced up and exchanged a look with Gwen; the men were obviously agitated about something.

"We have a problem," Owen announced. "Tech accident, figure it out."

"Excuse me?" asked Tosh, pushing her glasses to the top of her head. "Did this accident involve misplacing your manners by any chance?"

Owen opened his mouth to retort, but Ianto stepped forward and smiled, and Tosh couldn't help but smile back. Ianto never snapped at her the way the other two did.

"Sorry Tosh," he said. "But Owen's right. We found something on the retrieval that seems to have affected us."

"What happened?" asked Gwen, coming to stand with them. Tosh waited patiently for Ianto to answer, but Owen's stomach growled loudly instead, and Ianto frowned, his hands going around his middle.

"Didn't you eat anything for breakfast?" he asked, sounding annoyed.

"Not a thing." Owen shrugged, and Ianto looked slightly put out.

"Eat something," he said. "I don't fancy trying to figure this out whilst dealing with hunger pains all afternoon."

Owen rolled his eyes. "Fine. You explain, then." He bounded off and returned quickly with a beer, then sat down and practically inhaled a slice of pizza.

"What's going on?" asked Tosh, hoping for an answer this time. Ianto opened the containment box and carefully took out the artifact they'd found. It looked familiar, like something she'd seen before.

"It looks like a Bop It!" Gwen exclaimed. "I used to love those things."

"Apparently so did Owen," Ianto replied. "And it's not a Bop It, it's some sort of alien device that appears to have a rather unsettling effect if you try bopping it." He paused for effect. "Which Owen did, of course."

Tosh took it carefully, setting it down and immediately starting some scans. "What happened?" she asked. Ianto sighed and ran a hand through his hair. Tosh noticed Owen rub at his head, as if it itched. Oh, but that couldn't be it…

"I can feel what Owen feels, and he can feel what I feel."

"No way!" Gwen exclaimed. "That's not possible." She glanced back and forth from Tosh to Ianto. "Is it?"

"We work with alien technology from different times and planets," Ianto replied. "The Torchwood tagline may as well be 'Making the impossible possible.'"

"But feeling what someone else is feeling?" Gwen asked. "That's a stretch even for Torchwood."

"You do remember what happened to Owen last month, right?" asked Ianto. "With the tentacles?"

"Oi!" called Owen. "If we're telling embarrassing stories don't forget to share your own little mishap with that bit of alien goop and the rash—"

"Yes, yes," Ianto replied with a cough. Tosh exchanged a look with Gwen; they hadn't heard about that one. He continued with a neat deflection. "We've seen all sorts of alien technology fall through the Rift, is this really so hard to believe?"

Gwen didn't answer, but Tosh spoke up. "What do you mean when you say you can feel what the other person feels? Physically or emotionally?"

Ianto sighed. "Pinch me."

Tosh hesitated, but Gwen reached over and pinched his arm. Owen exclaimed from the couch, and her eyes went wide. "Owen!" she called. "Do something. Ianto, don't watch."

Owen rolled his eyes and cracked his neck. Ianto rubbed at it immediately with a grimace.

"Tense much, Owen?" he grumbled. Tosh shook her head in wonder.

"Believe us now?" Owen said. "So what do we do?" He took a long slug of beer and immediately belched. Ianto rubbed at his chest.

"That one hurt," he murmured. "How can you stand that stuff?"

Owen glanced at his bottle and shrugged again. "Tastes like rocket fuel, what's not to like?"

"The instantaneous heartburn?" Ianto suggested dryly.

"Bite me," Owen replied. Ianto raised an eyebrow, his jaw twitched, and Owen swore, his hand going to his mouth. It was a bit like watching a comedy sketch on iTv.

"You did that on purpose!" Owen exclaimed.

"Yep."

"It hurt."

"I know." Ianto grimaced slightly and turned back to Tosh with a long-suffering look on his face. "Please tell me you have some ideas?"

"Well, my first thought is that somehow your nerve endings are sending signals to one another and-"

"Not how it works, how to fix it," Owen grumbled.

Tosh sighed and examined the device some more. "I don't see any kind of switch, something that would reverse it, but that doesn't mean anything. We'll figure it out. I think it's best if you stick together, though," she said. "We don't know anything about what's actually making the connection between you. It could be something that gets worse if you're apart."

"Or it could get better," Ianto offered, sounding hopeful. "Fade away."

"Yeah, I'm not going to faint if teaboy leaves my side," Owen replied.

"We don't know that for sure," Tosh said. She glanced up at them, feeling bad but knowing it was for the best. "Look, if you can feel what the other person is feeling, it makes sense to stick together, so you know what the other person is doing."

"She's got a point," Gwen agreed. "You can't go out and get drunk tonight, Owen. You'd might stick Ianto with a hangover!"

"And I'll end up with his crick in the neck from sitting around knitting all night," Owen smirked. "Which is worse?"

"I don't knit!" Ianto huffed, looking offended.

"Bet you did latch-hook as a kid," Owen muttered under his breath.

"Oh, is that how you got that kitten pillow on your sofa?" Ianto replied. Tosh grinned as Gwen laughed at the sniping.

"Boys!" she said. "Stop it! Tosh knows what she's talking about so we'll all stay here until it's solved. Right?"

"I'll make it priority," Tosh told them. "Jack said we could all go home early since the Rift is quiet, but we'll figure it out first and you can go your separate ways as soon as we reverse it. I'm thinking we have to somehow disrupt the method of communication it's enabled between your nerve endings." She paused. "Assuming that's how it works, of course."

Owen rolled his eyes and stomped over to the couch, finishing his beer. Ianto rubbed his chest again and sighed.

"Are you sure we have to reverse it to leave?" he said softly, leaning toward Tosh and lowering his voice. "I have a date tonight."

"That's great!" Tosh exclaimed, then frowned as she realized the implication. "Oh no, I'm so sorry, Ianto, but I really don't think you should go, unless you want to take Owen."

"Take him where?" asked Gwen, appearing once more. "Ianto, did you say have a date? Really?"

He nodded, and then Owen was back with a smirk.

"You're taking the piss. You don't want to hang out here all night." Tosh felt bad for Ianto, but he didn't flinch in embarrassment at all.

Ianto shook his head. "No, I have a date. Reservations for dinner, tickets to a show, that sort of thing."

"Where are you going?" asked Tosh.

"Who are you seeing?" asked Gwen.

"Are you sleeping with them?" asked Owen. "Because that could be interesting."

"Owen!" Tosh exclaimed. Gwen and Ianto stared at him, one in surprise, one in disgust. Why were they all shocked? It was Owen, after all.

"What?" Owen asked. "Getting it off without a condom and all the awkward social niceties? Sounds good to me."

"You're disgusting," Tosh murmured, turning back to Ianto, who still looked slightly appalled.

"I don't even want to think about what my night would be like if you went on the pull," Ianto said. Owen smirked.

"You really don't."

"Tosh?" asked Ianto, turning back to her with a pleading look on his face. "Are you sure I need to stay here with him?"

"I'm sorry, Ianto," she said, and she really was. "I think it's for the best."

"What's for the best?" asked Jack, stepping out of his office with a broad smile on his face.

"Nothing," said Ianto with a sigh. "Just Torchwood getting in the way of actually having a life again." He turned and started for the coffee maker, shoulders slumped as he muttered under his breath.

"That sounds about normal," noted Jack with an exaggerated nod. "So what'd I miss? Find anything good on that retrieval?"

Everyone was silent. Tosh went back to studying the device, Owen snorted and avoided looking at anyone, and Gwen tried to hide a smile as she stared at the floor.

"Seriously," said Jack, sounding more concerned. "What's going on?"

Tosh glanced at Gwen, who looked at Owen, who shrugged. Gwen promptly reached over and pinched him hard. There was a yelp and a crash from the coffee maker.

"What was that for?" asked Ianto, rubbing his arm as he stomped back toward them. "Or did you want me to drop your coffee all over the floor?"

Tosh reached out and smacked Ianto across his arse. He yelped again, and it was immediately echoed by Owen, who swore as he rubbed his backside.

"Sorry," Tosh replied. "Just making a point."

"Oh," said Jack, eyes wide as he stared at the two men. "Oh wow."

It sounded like Jack knew what was going on. "Do you know what this is?" Tosh asked, holding up the device that she'd been studying. "Apparently Owen bopped it and now they're stuck like this." Jack took it and turned it over in his hands before handing it back with a shake of his head.

"I've never seen something like this before, no," he replied. Owen swore under his breath and even Gwen looked disappointed. "But I've heard of things like this happening." He paused and grinned. "Usually on Star Trek or something."

"So you don't know how to reverse it?" Ianto asked, his voice neutral. "Because Tosh thinks Owen and I need to stay at the Hub until we figure this out. Together. Tonight."

"Tonight?" asked Jack.

"Tonight," repeated Ianto with a very pointed look. Tosh had the distinct impression he was implying more than he was saying.

Jack opened his mouth, apparently thought better of it, then turned toward Tosh. "Why?" he asked. She was confused by his response.

"We don't know how they're connected, Jack," she replied. "What if it gets worse with distance?"

"What if it gets better?" Jack countered.

"What if Owen gets drunk?" asked Gwen.

"What if Ianto gets lucky?" Owen muttered and mimed an exaggerated shudder. Jack's eyebrows about flew off his face.

"Planning on getting lucky later?" he asked Ianto with a broad grin. Ianto rolled his eyes, but seemed to be holding back a smirk.

"Good chance. I do have a date tonight," he pointed out, sounding as if he were reminding Jack of the fact. Jack's face fell.

"That's right," he murmured. "Orsino's?" he asked. Apparently he already knew about Ianto's plans.

Ianto nodded. "And the show after."

"Chicago, right?"

"Rave reviews," Ianto replied, holding Jack's gaze. Jack nodded slowly.

"Damn," he said. "You could always take Owen, I suppose."

Ianto's eyes slipped closed with a groan as Owen protested.

"No way, I'm not tagging along on some lame prom date," he said. "If I can't hit the pub, he can't get off on some prison musical."

Gwen glanced at him. "Didn't know you followed musical theater, Owen."

"Bite me," he snapped.

"I believe Ianto already did," Gwen replied, and burst into giggles at the look on Jack's face.

"All right, this is getting old," Owen said. "I'm not spending the night here. Ianto, with me. We're running some tests. Tosh, figure that thing out. Jack, if you know anything that could help that you didn't see on television, please remember it."

He turned toward the medical bay. "What about me, Owen?" Gwen called. "What can I do to help?"

"Get the tickets changed?" Ianto asked immediately, then shook his head in embarassment. "Sorry, it's just that they were expensive and…" He coughed. "I think my date was looking forward to it."

Gwen patted him on the arm. "I can try, sweetheart," she said. "We're Torchwood, right? That should work for something. I'll walk over, talk to the box office right now."

"That would be great, Gwen," Jack replied, earning a surprised look from Gwen. "Where are the tickets?" he asked. Ianto opened his mouth, shut it, glanced upward, frowned, then nodded as if remembering something.

"I think I might have left them in your…er, folder in your office," he eventually replied. "I'll go check."

He ducked his head and hurried toward Jack's office, everyone watching. Jack was the first to turn back toward the others. "Well, we have a working plan. I'll head down to the archives and try to track down some of the references I've come across to these sorts of things. Send Ianto down to help when he's finished up here, yeah?"

Jack left and Tosh nodded absently, turning back to work on the device. Ianto came out of Jack's office looking slightly flustered, glancing around before settling on Gwen. He hurried over and handed her the tickets. "Thanks, Gwen. I appreciate it."

"No problem, sweetheart," she said, grabbing her jacket. "It's the least I can do when Torchwood messes up your love life."

Ianto shook his head. "Um, it's not like that. Just a date. That's all."

"But not your first, right?" asked Gwen coyly.

"No, not the first," said Ianto, heading toward the medical bay. "Few more than that."

"Ianto!" she exclaimed. "But that's wonderful! What have you been doing?"

Ianto coughed as if slightly embarrassed. "The usual. Dinner, movie, bit of pool at my local. Went out to Pennarth one night. Show tonight—well, not any more."

Gwen positively simpered. "I think it's great that you've found the time to see someone outside of work."

"Yes, well, we all have a bit more free time with Jack back on the rota we started, don't we?" he replied. Gwen followed him over to the medical bay, leaning over the railing while he went down to see Owen.

"So how long has it been then?" she asked. "And why haven't you said anything?"

"Oh, maybe two months or so?" Ianto replied. "And it's early days, you know how it is."

"What's her name?" asked Gwen with her gap-toothed grin, and Ianto rolled his eyes.

"Private," he said. "Owen, what do you need?"

"I need Gwen to stop badgering you with questions we all know you won't answer," he said. Gwen stuck her tongue out and Owen returned the feeling with a gesture of his own. "Let's do a blood draw first, get it over with."

"Do I get to stick you with a needle after?" Ianto drawled, and Owen looked at him in surprise. "You were affected too."

"And I can do my own draw on my left arm," the doctor replied. "No way am I letting you anywhere near me with a needle."

"I feel the same way," Ianto muttered. "But I don't have any choice. At least you'll feel your lack of bedside manners."

Owen stopped with the needle in midair. "That's right. Damn."

Gwen laughed above them. "Have fun boys," she said. "I'll do my best with the tickets." She glanced down, then frowned. "Ianto, these have Jack's name on them."

Ianto's head snapped up. "Oh, yes—well. He picked them up…he had some connections, gets a discount of some sort. Maybe he has a subscription or something."

Owen laughed out loud. "Of course Jack has a subscription to the musical series. Why am I not surprised."

Gwen was still frowning, but finally shrugged and left the Hub. Owen drew blood from them both, which meant twice as much muttering and swearing. After some more scans and a basic check-up, Owen declared Ianto as normal as ever and kicked him out while he ran their blood tests. Tosh sent Ianto down to the archives to help Jack find anything that could help and went back to concentrating on the strange device that had somehow connected her coworkers.

Author's Note:

Another mini-adventure in technology for Owen and Ianto! It follows in the style of 'Speaking in Tongues' and 'Captain, Tailor, Tinker, Spy', but is probably set before them, early in season two. I started this a long time ago so it's just about done. There are a few more parts, with the POV rotating between team members and the tone growing a bit more serious. Reviews are love! Enjoy!