Just an idea that wouldn't get out of my head. How did Zuko feel when he saw Katara Bloodbending?

Disclaimer: I do not own ATLA or any of it's characters

Understanding That Side of Her

The whole way back from our trip to the Southern Raiders I couldn't get the image of Katara taking full and absolute control of the ship's captain out of my head. I had never seen anything like it, it had been as if he had no control over his own body, he was at her mercy. I didn't even know how she did it. It seemed like some sort of hypnosis. It wasn't though, the man had been completely aware of what was happening to him. No, Katara had taken hold of a pull. A strength stronger than the man's willpower. I had to ask her about it. I couldn't sleep so I went to find her, knowing she would probably be awake.

On the way to her tent I saw a figure sitting on the plank of the river staring at the moon, it was almost full tonight.

"Hey," I said sitting down next to her "Can I ask you something?"
She looked at me carefully. "What do you want to ask?"
" When we were in the captains quarters, he lost control of his body and you...you were..." I faltered off, I couldn't describe exactly what she had done.
"I was bloodbending," She whispered. I was surprised to see a wet tear track on her face.
"Bloodbending?" The word was a question

She looked at me, scrutinizing me. She sighed, soft and sad.

"You know that I'm a waterbender?" She said stating the obvious, it was less of a question and more of a conversation starter.
"Yes, " I said slowly "You bend the water from oceans and rivers to your liking"
"Yes," She said "And your fire comes from the breath, right?"
"Where are you going with this?" I asked her
"I can pull water out of plants," She said showing me in one swift fluid movement, suddenly all the grass died.
"That's like the swamp benders," I said staring at the suspended water.
"Yes, it is. But did you know that I can pull water out of thin air as well?" She looked at me, then breathing in deeply she pulled her hand back and in her hand was a small pool of water, it seemingly came out of nowhere.
I watched the water drip slowly to the ground.
"That's very powerful, " I said for the first time seeing just how much she could do with her water.
"There's something else I can do, she said whispering softly."I can control the water in plants, Zuko, but I can also control the water in animals...and people,"

"How do you..." I trailed off
"It's a technique called bloodbending, I 'learnt' it from the only other southern tribe waterbender that I know. Her name was Hama. She was incredibly powerful and was the only waterbender that managed to escape the fire nation prisons, by using this technique. She had a terrible past and set herself a messed up future, she had been taking her revenge by bloodbending the innocent villagers to cave in the mountain, we found out eventually and she was taken away, but not before she taught me the technique as well. The way she looked at me when I mastered the technique, it was sickening, I had no choice though," Katara broke off, silent tears making wet tracks on her face.

I didn't know what to say. It was the first time that I'd even heard of bloodbending and it seemed like an incredibly powerful technique, more powerful than perhaps, lightning, the ultimate firebending technique. What made it so powerful was that in the instant you used the technique, you had that person's life in your hands, they were like a helpless puppet, while you pulled the strings.

"What...what is it like," I whispered
Katara looked at me questioningly
"What is it like to have that much power, to have someone's willpower in your hands and to watch it crumble in an instant," I said watching her every move.
"It's terrifying, for me," She whispered so quietly I could barely hear her "For me, having somebody's life in my hand is like murder. Maybe I'm too weak, that's why I can't see this technique as anything other than sickening, horrible, dark, nauseating, wrong," She said, the last word was firm and strong.

"Maybe...maybe you can start by using this technique on someone who trusts you first," I said warily
"What are you suggesting?" was her blunt reply
"Me?" I said questioning clear in my tone.
"Zuko, that's...that's crazy," She said completely taken aback
"Well I thought maybe it might work, at least let me see how it feels?" I asked trying to calm her down.
"I'm not sure, " she said carefully
"It's not going to hurt me Katara, I trust you," I said, now genuinely curious about what it felt like.
Her eyes hardened with determination and suddenly I felt my hand moving, against my will. It felt painful, but the pain wasn't from the position I was in, unlike the captain. No, the pain was from knowing that Katara was doing this, that she was capable of doing this. Suddenly I felt my arm regain control of my hand.

"Why would you do it," I asked her. It was clear she hated the technique.
"I wanted you to see what it was like," She replied emotionlessly.
"Katara, I already know what it's like to be at the mercy of others," I said
"No," She shook her head slowly "That's not what I meant, I meant I want you to see what it's like for me, why I hate the technique, It makes me a monster,"
Realisation dawned on me with her words, and utter denial came with it. She wasn't a monster, she had done nothing but good for the world. She thought she was one because she knew this technique, but it was different. Monsters are people who intend to hurt innocent people, deliberately for the sake of watching their pain.
"You're not a monster Katara, Just because you know the technique doesn't mean that you like it, Your only a monster if you really like the technique, and you use it to hurt innocent people. You're not a monster, My father is, and so am I,"

"You used to be a monster Zuko, but even monsters can be forgiven, and we've forgiven you, you can start again now, as a new person, a good person"
"You've forgiven me too?" I asked her
She stood up and I followed.
"Yes, I've forgiven you. You've redeemed yourself," She said

I gave her a hug and smiled.
"Thanks Katara, I needed to hear that, from you,"

That didn't turn out quite like I wanted it too...but it was just some Katara/Zuko bonding time without the Zutara romance. Anyway...please tell me what you think of it, constructive criticism appreciated.