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The Long Homecoming
Jantallian
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Before reading:
This story takes us on a very long ride from that moment below Baxter's Ridge in Stage Stop. I hope it has some unexpected twists and turns on the way and moments which will raise questions, not all of which are answered. If you would like to review (and I hope you will), please can you ask yourself before posting "Would I want to know this before I read the story?" If the answer is 'no', it helps other readers if you put some kind of warning or spoiler alert at the beginning of your review. Reviews of all kinds are welcome – I always reply to signed-in reviews and very rarely block a guest review. It's good to know what you think.
There are some references to earlier stories, including Casket of Dreams, Encounter in Shadows and Starlight Reflections but this story was not written as an exact sequel. It is the AU where Mike does not replace Andy but joins the whole family - a family which, of course, expands and extends over the years.
A warning: in Chapter 10, one character is described as 'like a wild animal' and there are two instances of language about and from this character which are appropriate to that description.
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1
1870, Fall
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He struggled to his feet, feeling curiously light-headed, and stood for a moment, surveying the situation.
It was the usual aftermath of a gun battle. An overturned wagon, half-burnt out. Loose horses milling about. Bodies sprawled across the road, unmoving now.
There was a hat lying in the dust. A black hat with a silver band. His hat.
He bent to pick it up. His hand seemed not to grasp it. As if his fingers went right through the material without him feeling a thing. Or as if the material went through him? Maybe bending down, so soon after that characteristic 'dive, roll and fire movement', combined with a very empty stomach, had made him feel dizzy?
Jess Harper shook his head, gave a shrug and dismissed the hat. There were plenty of hats in the world.
But there were not plenty of homes – how well he knew that! He berated himself now for a complete fool. What had he been thinking of, to turn down Slim Sherman's offer of a place on the ranch when every fiber of his being was calling out for just such a home, a friendship, a family?
He'd done so, of course, because he didn't feel worthy to join a life like his – reckless, dangerous, uncertain, rootless – to the stability of the household he had found so good and attractive in such a short acquaintance. He thought they, and especially young Andy, would be better off without him. At the time, he had ignored his own feelings and any potential for good in himself entirely.
This latest gunfight had certainly shown him the error of his ways. He hadn't even been fighting for pay - just ridden into town, seen a couple of kids, cowed and outnumbered, and had automatically gone in on the side of the underdog, determined to even the odds. He was in the thick of it almost before he had jumped from the saddle. Right as this might appear in the heat of the moment, it was a reckless attitude to live by, and fighting for pay was an even less commendable use of a whole lifetime. There were surely better ways! Despite his independence and liking for being his own boss, Jess had formed a deep, intuitive understanding with Slim Sherman as they had fought for justice together. It was a much better use of his skills than drifting from one job, one fight, to another. He had an inexplicable feeling, not just from their defeat of Bud Carlin but from somewhere further back in his past, that the tall rancher would always be on the side of justice. So no doubt life on the ranch would be as challenging as life on the drift – just different, more worthwhile, more meaningful.
That difference decided him.
If Slim would still have him, he was going back!
Ignoring the results of the gun battle and the tentative advances of those who had to deal with the bodies, Jess strode over to where he had left Traveller. The star-faced bay was waiting patiently. The reins were flung round the saddle-horn, which had left the horse free to move out of the melee of the battle in need be. It seemed to take Jess some weary hauling to get himself into the saddle, quite unlike his usual quick hop up.
The north wind blew suddenly down the street, swirling the dust thickly like a blanket of snow and reminding him that, despite the lingering warmth of fall, winter was not so very far off. Jess shivered involuntarily. He turned in his tracks, heading south instead.
"Come on, Trav, we're goin' home!"
# # # # #
It was already dark when he finally reached the Sherman Ranch and Relay Station once more. The road from the north was long, yet his eagerness to arrive at the place he already felt was 'home' had carried him swiftly over the intervening distance. The corrals and the barn were quiet and he guessed from the lights in the windows of the house that the three inhabitants were already at their evening meal.
Traveller was weary after so many miles, for Jess had barely rested in his urgency to get back. Attending to his horse first was automatic, so Jess led the bay into the barn and put him in the empty stall next to Slim's chestnut. The other horse snorted a startled greeting and seemed so surprised to see them Jess reckoned the humans might feel just the same. He didn't want to make free with the place until he was sure of his welcome. He'd leave Traveller saddled while he let them know he was back, just in case he was wrong and, worn-out as they were, they had to move on yet again.
It was this diffidence which took him not to the main door but to the side entrance through the kitchen – the way Andy had first taken him into the house. At the same time, though, it felt natural to come in this way at the end of a long day. It felt like something he'd be doing a lot, once he and Slim started working together.
He walked quietly through the kitchen, which was empty, so he figured Jonesy was busy serving up the meal. The murmur of voices reached him and he heard the front door bang.
Jonesy asked "Where's Andy run off to now?" and Slim replied "To get his coat from the barn before the puppies use it for a bed." The affectionate chuckles of both men warmed Jess's heart. Some folks would think Andy's habit of collecting stray animals was a nuisance and a waste of time, but here his skill and empathy with wild and tame creatures was accepted as a gift.
The door banged open again and Andy called something urgent, Jess couldn't quite make out what. There was the sound of chairs scraping and footsteps and a third thud of the door. By the time Jess had made it into the living room to ask what the heck was going on, it was empty.
He looked around. Soft lamplight and flickering firelight made the place warm and welcoming. Everything in the room was plain and simple, but serviceable. The curtains were drawn and a couple of rocking chairs pulled up to the fire. The table was laid ready and in the center of it reposed a saucepan of stew, which Jonesy must have put down when they'd all rushed out. Alongside was a big dish of apple pie.
Jess smiled. He recalled Andy serving him with pretty much the same meal not so long ago. Jonesy had evidently once been a chuck wagon cook and probably still didn't run to a lot of variety. It didn't matter. Jess was just grateful to be offered shelter and meals on a regular basis. Such was his appreciation that, even though he should be starving hungry like always, he was not tempted to raid the food. He was in any case just too weary. It would be so good to rest somewhere safe and permanent.
He was close to the rocking chair on the right of the fire. The one which faced the window. It seemed too far even to cross the hearth to the one on the other side. He'd just sit in the nearest and wait for them.
He sat down.
He dozed.
He drifted away.
# # # # #
"Slim! Jonesy! Come quick!"
Andy Sherman burst through the front door of the ranch house, almost falling over himself in his urgency.
"What's up?"
His elder brother sprang to his feet in alarm. Andy sounded as if an Indian attack was imminent, although Slim knew from experience this was unlikely, given the current state of relations between settlers and natives locally.
"Come on!" Andy did not explain, just headed out into the dark yard as if the fiends of hell were after him.
Slim scowled and quashed this unfortunate comparison as soon as he had thought of it. He raised an eyebrow and looked at Jonesy. The old cook shook his head, but put down the saucepan of stew he was holding and followed Slim out into the night.
"Look!"
Andy was waiting for them at the door of the barn, where he'd gone to retrieve his jacket before supper. He was hopping impatiently from foot to foot and, as soon as they drew close, led them into the shadowy interior, which was lit only by a single lantern.
"Look!" he said again.
In the second stall next to Alamo, Slim's chestnut, there was a strange horse. No, not a strange horse. Andy soon disabused them of that misapprehension.
"It's Jess's horse. Traveller. But Jess isn't here! He told me …" Andy's voice was choked, "he told me they were partners. Traveller's been with him for years. He said he'd never part with him unless he had to."
"He's still saddled." Slim moved forward to examine the horse. "Fetch some fresh water and feed, Andy. He looks like he's come a long way."
Even more than when Slim had first encountered Jess up by the lake, the animal looked done in. Wherever he had been since Slim and Jess parted on the road below Baxter's Ridge, the horse had evidently had a taxing journey. Slim moved into the stall and ran a gentle, cautious hand over the bay's neck. He could not imagine that Jess Harper would leave the animal unattended, unless some dire circumstance prevented him from caring for this most important companion of his wanderings.
So why was the horse here, now, in his barn - as if it belonged there?
Slim had hoped against hope that Jess would change his mind, that he would forsake the open trail and a life of drifting and instead put down roots in this, the best cattle country in the territory. Much more than this, Slim had come to recognize that Andy's initial intuitive response to the young drifter was right. That here was someone who would be utterly loyal to those he gave his heart to. That a man should be judged not by his past but by how he built the future with his present actions.
Pulling himself back from useless recollection, Slim moved to unsaddle the horse. As he did so, he made an unexpected and unpleasant discovery. The leather of the saddle was stained with a large dark blotch. When he touched it, it was still faintly damp. Slim saw too that a bullet had left a shallow graze across the horse's quarters.
He drew in a hissing breath. "You've been lucky, old fellow!" A little lower and the bullet which made this wound could easily have lodged in the horse's spine. He looked up and saw Jonesy was already moving towards the shelves where he kept his famous lineament and salve for stock.
Just then Andy came back, staggering with two full pails of water. "He looks real thirsty, Slim!"
"Hold on a moment, Andy," Slim said gently. "Jonesy needs to see to him first."
Andy gasped and went pale under his tan. "Traveller's hurt?" His eyes followed Slim's gaze. "He stopped a bullet?"
"No, it just grazed him," Slim reassured him as he carefully removed Traveller's gear and put it down in the corner of the stall for the time being. But Andy's mind was already jumping to the conclusion Slim himself had formed.
"What's happened?" the boy demanded anxiously. "Where's Jess? He'd never leave Traveller like this! Never!" His first action on finding Traveller had been to call out eagerly to his friend, but there had been no reply, only the quiet noises of the sleepy barn.
"Ok, calm down," his elder brother told him as soothingly as he could when his own mind was racing with fear. "Traveller arrived here, so Jess must have been headed back towards us. He can't be far away or the horse would have strayed off somewhere along the road."
"Not if Jess told him to come here!" Andy asserted firmly. "He's trained Traveller from when he was young and wild. Jess can order him to do all sorts of things and he'll obey."
Young and wild! That certainly fitted the Jess Harper with whom Slim had shared such a brief but powerful encounter. He just hoped the recklessness he had sensed in the younger man had not led to disaster.
Slim's thoughts were broken into by Andy's increasingly frantic concern. "He's out there somewhere, Slim – I know it! He's hurt and on his own. You gotta find him! You just gotta!"
But Slim needed no persuading. As Jonesy moved into the stall to treat the injured horse, Slim was already saddling Alamo to go in search of the friend he had made and lost so soon.
'I wanna make the next town before dark …'
Where did you go, Jess? Way beyond Laramie, that seems certain.
And it was twelve long miles just to Laramie. Twelve miles in uncertain light. Twelve miles of rock and forest. Twelve miles with a thousand places a wounded man could crawl into for shelter.
Where are you, Jess?
Once he had left the lamp-lit buildings behind and his eyes had adjusted to the fitful patches of moonlight, Slim searched as far down the road as he was able in the darkness. His night-vision was excellent, but of no avail. There was no sign of a fight and no trace of Traveller's trail on the well-used road. It was long after midnight when he finally reached home again with the bad news. One thought was in all three hearts.
Where are you, Jess? Please come home!
# # # # #
Jess roused with a smile on his lips. He could feel all their concern, their love for him, their longing for him to come safely home. It wrapped around him like a warm blanket of comfort, like a strong arm which promised support, like the knowledge that your back was always covered. He had never relied on anyone else, even though he had had working partnerships and passing friendships in his wanderings. He could hardly remember a time when he had not essentially been on his own. Now, suddenly, he was not alone any more. He didn't need to be and it felt good!
He must have dozed for longer than he thought, for the meal had been cleared away and Jonesy was halfheartedly trying to persuade Andy to go to bed. They'd accepted him into the family so completely that they'd even let him sleep while they got on with the business of the evening.
"I ain't goin' till Slim gets back!" Andy asserted roundly. "And you can't make me, Jonesy!"
Jess wondered where Slim had gone off to. He didn't remember hearing anything said, but Andy and Jonesy were obviously concerned. Jonesy pointed out that if Andy was going to burn a midnight candle, he could get on with studying his books and thus stave off some of his elder brother's wrath at taking liberties with his bedtime. Andy evidently thought this was a wise precaution and settled down quietly at the desk, soon to be absorbed in his reading. Jonesy disappeared into the kitchen, whence soft domestic noises presently issued.
Not wishing to interfere with Jonesy's authority or disturb either of them without good cause, Jess decided he would see sneak out and see if he could find out what Slim was up to. He went out soundlessly. No-one seemed to notice. He'd check the barn first and finish taking care of his horse; his conscience smote him as he thought of Traveller patiently waiting to be unsaddled and fed. How tired could he have been to neglect that!
The big lamp on the barn beam had been extinguished and all was quiet for the night. Traveller was lying down, sound asleep, but Jess could see that someone, Andy probably, had taken care of his mount. The kindness brought a lump to his throat. They must have realized how the long road back had exhausted man and horse. He decided Traveller could not possibly take him any further that night, but it might be alright to borrow a mount from the corral or near pasture if he was searching for Slim.
Outside the wind was blowing down from the north, raising wraiths of dust and lifting the fallen leaves like a drifting shroud. Jess decided it was unlikely Slim had headed down the road to Cheyenne, not so late in the day. It was more probable that he had gone into Laramie for some urgent reason. He was expected back and if he could return in an evening, he could not have intended to travel much further.
Maybe he'd like some company on the road home?
Jess grinned to himself as he headed for Laramie once again. He could imagine riding home with Slim after a night on the town, always supposing the blonde rancher could be tempted to drink? He sure hoped so! Slim was straitlaced, but he darn' well better not be that straitlaced! He definitely didn't think Slim had gone drinking on his own tonight, though, because Andy and Jonesy would not have been so concerned and sitting up waiting for him. No, it was something urgent, but not so demanding that he could not return the same night.
Ok, Slim my friend, y' ain't doin' this on y' own.
This principle was a major part of Jess's certainty of home – the knowledge that neither of them would have to be alone any more. He had sensed, once he had got over his initial angry misunderstanding, that Slim bore a heavy burden of responsibility for the ranch and his younger brother and probably for Jonesy too. Slim was obviously law-abiding and conscientious and no doubt spent a good deal of time worrying about the work and the income of the spread. The mere fact that he had taken on a stage company franchise argued he was in need of money, but also that he was reliable enough to be trusted with the efficient running of a relay station.
At this thought, Jess smiled again. Not only was he himself a hard worker, who could make a real contribution to lessening Slim's burdens, but he could also ensure the older brother didn't get so swamped in his responsibilities that he never had any fun! Andy on the other hand, with whom Jess had found a real kindred spirit, was perfectly capable of generating fun of his own to share with others.
But Slim Sherman needs Jess Harper's expertise and experience! Ok, where've y' got to?
Almost in an instant, it seemed, Jess found himself catching up with Slim. The other man had obviously reached whatever point he had been heading for and turned back towards the ranch, but there was no indication of what he had been doing. It was all very mysterious! As the distance between them closed, Jess saw that Slim was not watching the road, but, as far as was humanly possible, was scouring both sides of it as if he was searching for something. This made Jess chuckle, since he had been searching just as hard for his new boss.
Where are you, Jess?
The words were faint vibrations in the swirling of the air. The wind whipped a pall of dust around Jess, enveloping him like a cloak, giving him the appearance of some figure from an old legend. He was a shadow within the shadows.
Slim started violently and pulled his chestnut to a halt.
"Jess? Is that you?"
The pain and concern in his voice seemed to drive right through Jess, piercing him where his very heart should be. But before he could respond or move closer out of the shadows, Slim shook his head and urged his horse towards home. As his friend rode past in the darkness, Jess heard him mutter to himself, "Wishful thinking! I won't find him tonight, not in the dark. Maybe he'll be waiting safe at home anyway?"
With that, without taking a further glance in Jess's direction, the rancher spurred his horse into a gallop, despite the darkness and the roughness of the road. There was something of Jess's own recklessness in Slim's obvious urgency.
Jess, however, was never one to ignore a challenge. If Slim wants t' find me back at the ranch, I sure am gonna get there first! That top road is quicker and less ruts.
No sooner said than done, it appeared. Then, with a patience he had never demonstrated before, Jess hung around the barn, waiting for Slim to catch up and arrive back at the ranch.
When he finally did so, Slim stopped his horse at the hitching rail, flung the reins over and strode wearily into the house.
Jess followed him.
Andy jumped up from the desk, eager hope written all over his face. Jonesy raised much more sceptical eyes from the newspaper he was attempting to read. Slim shook his head.
"Nothing."
"But Slim," Andy gave a heartbroken wail. "He's got to be –"
"There's nothing more I can do tonight, Andy. I'll backtrack all the way into Laramie in the morning and try to find out if anyone spotted a riderless horse. I need you to sleep now because you and Jonesy'll have to deal with the stages tomorrow. Can you do that for me?"
"Sure, Slim!" Andy had mastered himself and was showing commendable maturity as he made his way at once to the bedroom. In the doorway he turned and said, "I sure hope you're gonna get some good news."
Slim walked over and ruffled his hair affectionately. "We'll do everything we can to find Jess and bring him safely home," he stated firmly. "That's a promise!"
Jonesy followed Andy into the bedroom and Slim went out to deal with his horse.
Jess sank once more into the rocking chair. Things were beginning to clarify in his mind.
That sure was one hellava bargain I struck just now!
# # # # #
Breakfast the next morning took place along with the dawn. It was subdued affair.
Slim had been up almost as early as Jonesy and had finished the essential tasks in the barn and yard. In this he was ably assisted by a sleepy but determined Andy. The look of hope on the boy's face, dashed so soon when he found Jess had not turned up mysteriously in the night, cut Slim to the heart. As if his heart wasn't sore enough already with his own loss. How had a drifting stranger managed to earn such a place in it in so short a time? He couldn't tell, but he knew in the depths of his being that the ranch was not complete without Jess Harper.
One thought was in all three minds this morning.
Where are you, Jess? Please come back!
No-one had the appetite to eat much either. Jonesy had anticipated this, plus the need for speed, and given them just essentials to keep them going through the day of searching.
"I'll ask the drivers," he told Slim. "Maybe there'll be word along the road someplace he's bin."
"Yeah. And I had a thought during the night. I met him up by the lake and he said Traveller hated the ruts on the main road. Maybe he came that way."
Andy's face lit up at this obvious solution. "I'll go look!"
Slim made a lightning decision. Despite his instinct to protect his little brother, it would do Andy so much good to take definite action instead of being at home imagining the worst. "OK. Once the first stage has been through, you ride up and check out this side of the top road and the lake. I'll go into Laramie and see what I can find out. Then, if there's still no news, I'll come back by the top road and cover the other half."
"Great!" Andy suddenly developed an appetite for breakfast after all.
Jonesy and Slim exchanged worried glances. They both knew what a challenge this search would be. Nonetheless, there was nothing they would not try in order to find Jess. It was as if his physical return to the ranch was wrapped up intimately in its family fortunes and the prosperity of the whole enterprise. Neither of them could give an immediate reason for such an instinct; it was just the need which drove them. The immense difficulty of how they were to achieve this without the slightest knowledge of where Jess had gone or what he had done, did not deter them in the least. And until they found some definite answer, they would spend hours, days, if they had to.
It was mid-morning when Andy returned to the ranch with a heavy heart. Despite careful searching – and a young boy knew very well all the secret hiding places and shelters in the vicinity of the ranch – he had found nothing. Not so much as a strand of horse-hair or a recent hoof-mark. The day would drag on now in meaningless routine until Slim returned.
Slim, meanwhile, had conducted another careful ride into Laramie, keeping his eyes peeled and finding not so much as a strand of horse-hair flagging up a thicket nor a recent hoof-mark deviating from the beaten track. When eventually he reached the town, he rode into the Livery Stables.
"You have anyone put up here yesterday?"
Walt Haber shrugged and gave a wry chuckle. "This is a livery stable, Slim."
"Yeah, I know. I need to find a horse." Slim was so intent on his quest that it seemed everyone must be able to read his thoughts.
"You gotter horse," Walt pointed out.
"Another horse. Little bay with a white star. Quarter Horse. Tough. Traveled a long way."
Walt shook his head.
"Maybe you'd remember the rider? Young man, lean, a little shorter than me. Dark curly hair, the brightest blue eyes you've ever seen. Tough. Drifter. Traveled a long way."
"Like his horse?" Walt chuckled again. "I'd remember the horse, Slim. For the man you'd best try the saloon or the hotel."
Slim tried the hotel. No-one answering Jess's description had ever registered, or so the clerk said. It had never seemed likely anyway: Jess Harper had not looked flush with spare cash, but he obviously would have had no difficulty in winning more at poker. Slim headed for the saloon.
It was past midday, so there was probably some perverse logic in the fact that gaming and drinking were already well underway, judging by the noise emanating through the bat-wing doors. As Slim strode up to them he heard Freddie the barman admonishing one of his most regular customers: "That's enough now, Abner. Y' talkin' no sense at all. Get along home with y' 'n sleep it off!"
There was something of a scuffle and the next moment an elderly man tottered out straight into Slim's arms. They both swayed alarmingly at the impact until Slim managed to exert his strength to keep them upright.
"Going home, Abner?" he inquired breathlessly.
"Threw me out! Threw me out!" the old man mumbled. "Said I was making it up! Me! I never did. My pa'll take his belt to me if I ever tell lies!"
Since Abner's father was long since peacefully in his grave, this apprehension seemed misplaced. The old man continued to mutter to himself, not making, as Freddie had pointed out, a great deal of sense. Slim was, however, a kindhearted young man and patiently steered Abner in the direction of his little shack, round the back of the hotel.
"As if I'd lie," Abner asserted feebly. "I saw it. Saw it with my own eyes."
"You did?" Slim responded soothingly. "What did you see?"
"Saw a bay horse coming down the street. At nightfall. Coming from the north it was. Bay horse with a white star on its forehead."
"You saw it?" Slim's heart was in his mouth, but he tried to keep calm. "Why wouldn't they believe you?"
"A bay horse," the old man continued, "tough little thing it was. Covered in trail dust and sweat but kept right on going south."
"Was there a rider?"
"No rider that I could see," Abner replied.
Slim's heart sank. "So why won't anyone believe you?" It didn't make sense, any more than Abner ever did when he'd had a skinful.
"It was travelling fast - faster than the wind," Abner told him.
Well, it probably looked that way to a drunk! Slim thought.
"Faster than the wind," the old man repeated. Then he stopped and leaned towards Slim, his whiskey-sodden breath gusting into the young man's ear. "But here's the thing. That horse was travelling faster than the wind. But its legs – they were just ambling, slow, like you'd do on a long journey."
There was a pause while they both thought about this statement.
Abner said quietly, almost to himself, "Gave me a right shock it did. Ambling and moving like the wind at the same time. And it was gone in no time too, because I turned round to call into the saloon right behind me for them to come see and when I looked back it had vanished. Like the wind!" The thought was uncannily persistent. "Just had to have a double shot for the shock!" Abner added.
No wonder they didn't believe him!
Slim steered the old man home and safely in his door. As he walked back towards the main street he was thinking hard and by the time he reached the Sheriff's Office he had also reached a decision.
"Abner saw the horse. Coming from the north. With no rider," Sheriff Mort Cory stated as he leaned back in his chair. He liked to get his facts straight. "And it was travelling fast."
"So Abner said."
"Slim, it's the tale of an old drunk in the dark. One who's been in and out of the saloon all day." Mort looked at his young friend with affectionate skepticism. "What are you asking me to do?"
"Check the towns to the north. Anyone you've got contacts with. Jess was coming home, but only his horse made it."
Mort's eyebrows shot up. He'd met the young drifter briefly when the posse had been cleaning up Bud Carlin and his henchmen. A wild young man, if Mort's experience of men was anything to go by, and one whose past probably didn't bear too much close scrutiny. Yet even this passing interaction had suggested something more – Harper had backed up Slim Sherman without even knowing him and, if Slim's account was anything to go by, acted with integrity and courage. Without his accurate shooting, the outcome might have been very different for Slim.
"Home?" the Sheriff asked curiously.
"I offered him a place on the ranch, but he turned it down and rode on," Slim responded simply. "I hoped he'd change his mind, once he'd had time to think about it. Apparently he did."
"But only his horse arrived?"
When Slim nodded, obviously not wanting to voice this potentially tragic news again, Mort found himself agreeing to help.
"Give me a couple of days and I'll do my best to get news for you."
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Notes:
HABER - German, occupational name for one who grew or sold oats, derived from Old High German 'habaro' = oat