Authoress' Note: I do not own Bleach. I own my original character, Kei Akumamaru. This is an "alternate universe" plot line. You could say that it takes place after the Soul Society Arc, but before the whole "Aizen taking Orihime" Arc. Single quotes show my character's thoughts.

The Pink Elephant

I walked through the third company, having just returned from the latest Women Soul Reapers Association. It's been months since the conspiracy and Izuru and I are still co-leaders of our company. 'I guess they just can't find anyone good enough.' I sighed, turning into the office that I feel like I've practically lived in for the past two weeks.

I sat down at my desk and glared at the small mountain of papers that, I swear, had grown since I'd left them last. "I hate recruitment time." I growled, picking up the first twenty-or-so applications. I didn't even look up as Izuru walked in, instead, I kept talking. "None of these kids are any different. There's not one unique thing about them." And with that, I tossed the stack of papers back on the pile, procrastinating once again.

Just then, Matsumoto burst through the door. "That's it! I've got to get out of here. I can't throw a party anywhere because my oh-so-wonderful captain has threatened every single barkeeper within a hundred-mile radius with an unearthly demise if they even think about serving me alcohol!"

I tried to not laugh at my friend's dilemma. Even though, I did realize that this could be a problem. After all, I can't even count how many times the many soul reapers have let go of their sorrows and allowed to be drowned in the gallons of intoxicating beverages at Matsumoto's wild parties, just to relieve the stress of relentless work and pressure. "You could just go to the human world, you know." I suggested, unknowingly planting a demonic idea in the taller, over-endowed woman's head.

She turned to me, smiling. "Kei, you're brilliant." She had an evil look in her eyes, and it kind of frighted me. "How would you guys like to go to a party I'm having?"

:: — : — : — ::

I found myself standing outside of a night club called The Pink Elephant. "Apparently, it was one of the more lively venues that Matsumoto could have chosen." Izuru said to me as a rather large man was thrown out the door by an even larger bouncer. I vaguely noted the dance floor and the steady, electronic beat as I followed Matsmoto in, who lead us to a large booth in the corner.

"So, what can I get you?" a tall, bleached blonde waitress asked, her too bright smile felt slightly out place considering the setting. Matsumoto ordered large bottles of sake for the table, while Renji got beers for everyone. 'Are they trying to kill themselves?' I smiled and said that I only wanted a glass of ice water.

"You're not going to drink?" Matsumoto questioned.

I shook my head. "I never enjoyed the taste of alcohol." She rolled her eyes at me. "And you know, sometimes the after effects aren't so great either." At that I nudged Izuru in the ribs, silently reminding him of all the times he stumbled into my room at the wee hours of the night.

"I will never understand you, Kei." Hisagi said to me, taking a long swig from one of the newly arrived beer bottles.

I smiled and shrugged. "That's not my problem." I leaned back and slowly sipped my water, watching the group of usually upstanding soul reapers degrade into lunatics, no thanks to the strong alcohol.

"Hey! Hey! I've decided something!" Renji yelled out to the table.

When half a minute passed and he didn't say anything else I sighed, "Oh yeah, what's that, Renji?"

At first he looked at me as if I had grown a second head or asked the stupidest question in the world, but then his face went blank as his eyes traveled down my top half. "Izuru, you're right, Kei has a much better body than Isane."

I felt violated by just sitting there. I quickly grabbed one, of the many, empty sake cups, and threw it at his head. But I turned in my seat as Hisagi slurred, "I agree, Kei's got more muscle on her. A real athlete that one; I bet she's flexible, too."

I was about to open my mouth and tell them that I wasn't a horse up for bidding, and that they shouldn't talk about me as one when Ikkaku lifted his shiny head off of the table to give a sly grin to a hammered Izuru. "I'm sure that comes in handy, doesn't it, Izuru?"

I made a disgusted sound and stood up to go out to the dance floor. I smiled as a song that I recognized, Blaqk Audio's Semiotic Love, came on the loud, booming speakers. I walked through the crowd to the middle of the floor, and began to sway my hips to the beat.

I mouthed the words and threw my arms above my head, ignoring the strangers around me and losing myself to the music.

I vaguely registered another body joining me as the song changed to something I didn't know, and it was as soon as I felt a large hand grope my backside that my eyes flew open and my brain realized just what was happening. I backed away from the stranger, panicking on what to do. The man grabbed my wrist and roughly pulled me back whispering, "You're not going anywhere."

I wasn't quite sure why it suddenly got so quiet, or why the dance floor cleared out so fast, that is, until I saw Izuru, Hisagi, Ikkau, and Matsumoto, stalk towards me and my captor. I unwillingly started to hyperventilate. 'This is very, very bad.'

"Let her go." Izuru growled, the alcohol having, apparently, worn off. The cold look in his blue eyes frightened me, giving me the exact same feeling every time I had looked into the glare of our old captain, Gin Ichimaru.

I winced from the greater pressure on my small wrist, fearing that he would break it. "No. She's mine now. I can do what I want with, and to, her." The man said, emphasizing his statement by squeezing my wrist even harder. I gasped in pain, cursing myself for doing so because that only intensified the anger swelling from the soul reapers.

"He said it nicely the first time." Ikkaku said. "I guess you're not very smart, or lucky." They walked a couple of steps forward, but stopped when I cried out again.

"Every step you take causes her more pain." the man threatened. I tried to calm myself and weigh out my options, but I was at the disadvantage. 'I could kill this guy, but he is a human and that would be an unforgivable crime. If I move, he'll hurt me more and that will just worsen the situation.'

This time, only Izuru walked forward. "Now, I will only say this one more time." I looked down at the floor, trying not to scream. "Let her go."

Snap.

The next few moments were a blur. I felt the pain spike from my wrist to my entire arm. And I knew I screamed that time. I could feel that I was being pulled away by someone but that the unwelcome stranger pulled me back by my broken wrist. The pain clouded my eyes and I let myself slip into unconsciousness.

:: — : — : — ::

I woke up lying in the Fourth division's recovery room. My eyes were hazy in the morning sunshine and I suddenly had a hatred towards songbirds. Especially the loud ones outside the window. "Good mourning, Kei." I turned and stared at Izuru.

Then it all hit me. All of the previous night's memories flooded back to my head. "What happened? Was there a fight? Was anyone hurt? Did I black out and go on a killing spree? Answer me, Kira!" I swung my legs off the bed and stood up, only to have a shooting pain go up my leg and fall into Izuru's open arms. 'I don't remember getting that.'

"I kind of expected that to happen." he sighed as he placed me back down on the bed. "You see, after you passed out, that guy tried to run off with you. We chased him, of course. But, he was fast; when we caught up with him you already had some new injuries. Either he was really clumsy with you, or he tried to wake you up by inflicting more damage."

"Or both." I interrupted.

"Or both..." he repeated sadly. "I'm so sorry, Kei. I should have protected you better. I'm the worst-"

I cut off his words with a light butterfly kiss. "We both know that your not the worst. At anything. And, I think we both know that under usual circumstances, I can protect myself, though help from you is always deeply appreciated." I smiled at him, and gave him one more kiss before leaning back on the bed. "So, you know what this means, don't you?" I asked Izuru, looking at my heavily bandaged wrist. When I didn't get an answer I continued. "You get to do all of the paperwork."