What can I say about my father?

The one thing, the only thing, Henry Spencer would want me to say about him is that he was one hell of a cop.

And he was. Anyone who knew him knew that. He was one hell of a good cop.

"That's all they need to know, Shawn. Say it, sit down, and shut up. No one wants to hear you ramble."

Well, I'm sorry to disappoint you one last time, Dad. But I'm going to ramble.

Being a cop was my dad's life. Even after he retired, he could never let it go. Not really. It was something that was in his blood. It was something that he tried to pass down to me, but for whatever reason it just never stuck. That was sort of the hallmark of our entire relationship. He would teach me something, and it wouldn't stick.

At least, I couldn't ever tell him it stuck.

That would've ruined everything; our entire oil and water dynamic would have been lost forever.

I was the water, of course.

But I guess I can tell you now, Dad.

Some of it…stuck.

You never taught me how to hit a baseball, but you taught me how to look beyond the obvious and see everything just below the surface.

You never taught me how to fish (though you tried and tried and tried and tried), but you taught me to think on my feet and to solve any problem life, or you, threw at me.

You never taught me to carry a badge (though you always wanted to), but you taught me how to right wrongs in my own crazy, drive-you-insane way.

You never taught me how to be you, but you taught me how to be strong enough to always be me. Even when no one else understood that. Even when you disapproved of that. I could never be you, Dad, because you made me too strong to cave to anyone that easily.

So, in a way…I guess it's all your fault. You have no one to blame but yourself.

I guess I can tell you that now, too.

I guess I can also tell you that…I always wanted to be you, Dad. In some weird, childlike way…I always wanted to be just like you.

Do you remember the watch you gave me? The inscription on the back says "Don't Lose." Every time I have a hard case, every time I'm faced with something I think I can't solve, I look at that watch.

"Don't Lose"

And, somehow, I always know what to do.

I can't lose, Dad. You won't let me.

And maybe that's the most important thing you ever taught me.