So this is a spin off series of my friend Pouncii's story How to Stop Your CATS Fanfic from Sucking so Hard. And before you ask, yes I asked her about it and yes she's totally on board. I suggest you read her story if you haven't yet! It's hilarious!
The Jellicles were fed up. Their Junkyard had been over run with poorly written Original Characters. They were everywhere- in the TSE-1, in the pipes, on the tire, flirting with the Toms, and looking down on the queens.
One was being particularly insistent that Tugger should fall madly in love with her.
"Hey there handsome. My name is Sapphire Moonstar." Sapphire Moonstar brushed a lock of her gold and silver fur behind her ear. She was leaning on Tugger, who just gave her a glare of distain. She wouldn't let his complete lack of interest stop her, though.
"Aren't you desperately and irreversibly in love with me? Don't you want to abandon all flirting and become completely OOC for me?" She purred, fluttering her sparkly eyelashes.
"Uh, no." Tugger said, shoving the queen off of him, and fluffing up his mane.
"But you have to love me! How can you not?I'm pretty, I'm just the right ammount of shy, but still outgoing when it suits me. I've got literal stars in my eyes. And even though I'm beautiful I'm really down to earth and self conscious! I'm perfect!" Sapphire Moonstar whined. Just then, Ebony Darkraven appeared and pushed Sapphire Moonstar out of the way.
"What about me, Tugger? I have a horribly dark and depressing past, which is the only thing I talk about! I also died my fur all black to reflect on my soul. I only shop at hot topic because I'm too cool for pop culture. Also, I may or may not be a vampire."
Tugger shivered in disgust and pushed the second queen away from him. "No thanks, babe."
"But I'm so different! I reject the popular while still being as flashy and annoying!"
Tugger started backing away as both Ebony Darkraven and Sapphire Moonstar strted advancing towards him.
"Love me!" Sapphire Moonstar whined.
"No, love me!" Ebony Darkraven moaned.
"Misto! Help a brother out?" Tugger yelled, trying to get away from the queens. But Misto was having trouble himself.
"Misto we're both really shy and small! I'm an amazing dancer, way better than every other Jellicle! And I have never practiced in my life! Aren't you impressed?" Snowsparkle squeeled, preening her perfect white fur.
"Don't listen to her- I'm better than ALL of the canon Queens. I dance better than Victoria, I have more Toms chasing after me than Bombalurina, I have a more tragic past than Demeter, I'm strong enough to defeat Macavity myself, and I even have magic!" Demetalurina exclaimed.
"Oh yeah? Well have absolutely nothing original or interesting about me but every Tom in the Junkyard is STILL bound to fall in love with me. Because I'm the actually just the Author inserting herself into a story to make her fantasies a reality!" Humphed Bellatri.
"Ladies, p-please, just... Just give me some breathing room." Misto said, backing away from them. He snappe his fingers a couple times before he managed to make a forcefield strong enough to keep the queens at bay. He didn't know how long he could hold them off for.
Meanwhile, Bombalurina was also being attacked by OCs but in a very different way.
"I hate you because you remind me of someone I'm jealous of in real life!" Hissed Babette.
"Yeah, I'm hotter than you and because you're pretty I'm going to make you really mean in my story so I don't have to feel so insecure!" Growled Shiningsun.
"Yeah because if your pretty and boys like you and you're not the main character of COURSE you're mean." Babette agreed.
Bombalurina looked between the two queens confused. "Look, girls I don't know why you are freaking out on me so much, but I haven't done anything to you-"
"You flirted with Tugger!" Shiningsun interrupted.
"Yeah, well he's my Tomfriend, so I don't really understand why-"
"Because I like him and if he likes any other girl I don't like her. And if I don't like her than she HAS to be mean and evil, right?" Babette said.
"I don't think that logic is very sound actually-"
"And now you're calling me stupid! You're so mean!" Babette cried. Shiningsun gasped and wrapped her arms around her friend to comfort her.
"How dare you! You think just because you're pretty you can get away with being mean to my friend? You're such a witch!"
"I didn't do anything to her!" Bombalurina yelled frustratedly.
On top of a nearby junk pile, Jenny frowned. She had been watching the madness of the Junkyard for a couple minutes now and it was only getting worse. How did all these OCs get in here anyways? Were Munk and Alonzo sleeping on the job? No matter- this needed to end. Now.
Jenny jumped down from her perch, and onto the rickety roof of the TSE-1 car. All around her Jellicles and OCs were yelling and crying and demanding and defending. The noise was deafening. She took in a deep breath then yelled:
"EVERYONE BE QUIET!"
All at once, silence fell over the Junkyard. The cats turned their attention sheepishly to the old Gumby cat.
"Thank you." Jenny nodded. "Now I don't know how all of you got in here, but this is a serious problem. Most of you are atrociously written, and need to be rewritten completely. So i would like you all to get into the kitten classroom right this second so we can sort you all out."
The Original Characters all looked at each other, unsure of what to do.
Jenny scowled at them. "Do I look like I'm kidding? Go. NOW."
Begrudgingly, the OCs began to head towards the kitten classroom one by one, the Jellicles relieved to finally be free of them.
"So what are we going to do about them?" Tumblebrutus asked, as the Jellicles began to pool around Jenny.
"Yeah, we can't just keep them here." Pouncival whined.
"We're going to try and reform them." Jenny stated.
"And if that doesn't work?" Tugger asked. He was still trying to fix his mane which had been mauled by OC queens.
Jenny shrugged. "We could always call an exterminator."
Mutters of approval scattered around the group.
"Alright then, let's get to it." Skimbleshanks said, rubbing his paws together. "The sooner their gone the better."