Hello Everyone! So a few notes to begin...

This fic will have a Florida/Nascar theme. If that's not your thing, have no fear because there won't be too much about the races or anything. If it is your thing, then yay because I would love your input as I myself only know the basics! On that note, I would love everyone's input on this fic. I'm writing it on the fly (which is new to me as I usually have a structured outline) so I would love your feedback with suggestions for the plot, mistakes, or important florida/nascar facts I should know.

Also I do not own Once Upon a Time and am not making any money from writing this.

Enjoy!

Hello,

I feel silly writing to you but Katherine has been trying to get me to write for a few months now. Ever since Mother died she has insisted that I need to talk to someone about my feelings. When that didn't work, she suggested a diary. That is what I am attempting here. I tried to write my feelings in a notebook, I really did, but I could't do it.

So I decided to write to you Daddy, because you were always the person I confided in. If I'm being honest (and there is no reason not to be here) I have conversations with you in my head all the time. Maybe you already know this?

I can see why Katherine would suggest this exercise for me. There has been a lot of changes in my life in a short amount of time. I was at the beach today, looking out over the ocean and thinking about it all.

The waves crashing onto the shore were the only sounds Regina could hear. She had been staring into the horizon for about an hour now and had only encountered one other person during that time. She was pleasantly surprised. Granted, it was February, but this was also Florida and it happened to be 70 degrees.

Regina had purposely moved to this area because it was known for it's seclusion. Close enough to Daytona Beach to be exciting but far enough away to not be living in a city. The beach across from her neighborhood wasn't technically a private one, but it was next to a highway with no place to park, and no lifeguards so that generally left it empty. From what she's seen it's mostly filled with retired people. This is exactly what she wanted. In her opinion, it was almost as far away from the life she had in NYC as she could get.

She could see how not being surrounded by people could get lonely though. Not that Regina talked to random people on the street, but at least the option was there. She really didn't have anyone. She was an only child, and both her parents were now deceased. She had recently broken up with her boyfriend, and her best friend Katherine lived in another state.

Hopefully all that would change though. She thought wistfully as she pulled her cardigan tighter against herself to protect from the ocean breeze.

Regina was hoping to adopt a baby. She had always wanted to be a mom but for a number of reasons (most having to do with her own mother) it never seemed to happen for her. It was hard for a single woman to adopt though, especially when they live in Brooklyn and worked all the time. She knows she only stayed with her last boyfriend Robin as long as she did was because of his adorable son Roland. Although Roland lived with his mom most of the time and Regina didn't see him that often anyway. She never really saw herself with Robin though. Truthfully she had really only had one boyfriend that she ever loved.

And there is a reason for that. She allowed herself to think about that reason for once instead of shoving it to the back of her mind.

Just as she is thinking this, a blonde woman walks in front of her on the beach. The movement catches Regina's attention and she watches as the surprisingly young woman puts her towel down a several feet away and immediately begins to strip her outer layers of clothes. Even though (in Regina's opinion) it's still too cold for swimming. She moment the blonde is left in only a bikini Regina's mind goes blank. It's like static on the radio.

The woman is RIPPED. She looks like she should be on the cover of sports illustrated. Regina can only see the profile of her face but she is sure it's as beautiful as the rest of her. Suddenly she became flushed watching her wade into the water. The moment she realized this though she abruptly truns on her heel and exists the beach.

What was I doing! Leering at her! I hate when men do that to me. She chastised herself. She's the reason though. Regina concedes.

So Daddy, this woman is really the reason I finally decided to put pen to paper and write to you. She reminded me of what I was trying to suppress.

I think I'm a lesbian.

And I know sexuality is not black and white. And you know how much I loved Daniel.

So maybe I'm like 70 percent gay?

Does it really matter the percent though? Even now that mother is gone and I would fell safe enough to pursue these thoughts, I know that I probably won't. I'm too focused on babies to worry much about dating.

But this is the catalyst because for all of the other changes occurring in my life (mother's death, the breakup, the move, the new job) this is the one thing I couldn't tell anyone about but the one thing I couldn't keep to myself either.

Next chapter will have some Emma I promise. Do you think I should include Emma's inner thoughts though? The whole idea is that this is Regina's diary and memories but I do write in third person at times. Let me know! Thanks