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Authors Intro- Hello there! From those of you who may know me from "A Movement In A Minor" (which I'm guessing is most of you, considering only my loyal readers and friends actually read this stuff), you are most likely familiar with me as writing angst and disturbing violent imagery. However, I'm sure, as fellow writers, you know how damnably hard it is to write angst all the time. So, as that is, this fic will be mostly angst-free. Mostly. ^_^ Here I will endeavor to amuse you, maybe tug a little at your heartstrings, and possibly make you think a little. (That last one is doubtful, so don't feel obligated.) Enjoy!
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-dedicated to Liz Wright-


"I WILL NEVER FORGIVE YOU FOR THIS, JAMES POTTER!"

The oath ricocheted up and down the stone walls of the staircase, each word colored with rage venomous enough to be violent. The words in and of themselves weren't enough to catch any passing student's attention; after all, the seventh-year Gryffindor seemed to make it his business to offend at least one person in the school a day. On the contrary, it was the voice that had roared those words with such fury, such burning and ardent wrath.

So, it was for the hope of seeing a wizard's duel between best friends, or perhaps former best friends made enemies, that the entire sixth and seventh year population of Gryffindor and Hufflepuff crowded back into the stairwell.

Wands were already out, arms held back in a stiff dueling position. Blue eyes glared into crystalline blue, equally raven hair mussed with battle and exertion. And, as followed tradition, the offended party was the one to cast the first hex.

"CASU CONSULTO! " Sirius Black roared, taking an offensive position and flinging a ball of pearly light from the end of his wand.

James sidestepped with his light Seeker grace, but he seemed not fast enough to avoid the charm. The light struck his knee and he stumbled, coughing violently into his sleeve. The onlookers leaned forward in eager anticipation. It was a spell they had never heard of, after all; maybe Potter would end up coughing out grindylow larvae or something equally grotesque. But to their disappointment, he fought off the apparent effects and snapped back to attention.

"BRACCAE TUAE APERIUNTUR! "

The flurry of golden sparks that burned from the end of his own wand sent violent convulsions along each of Black's limbs, his long robes winding around his legs and knocking him to the floor. He snarled and fought his errant clothing, beating it back into submission enough to rise to one knee and counterattack.

"ITA ERAT QUANDO HIC ADVENI! "

The long string of unknown words brought a gasp from the bystanders, but it appeared Sirius wasn't done yet. He flung his arm wide, then brought his wand down in a violent stabbing motion. "CANIS MEUS ID COMEDIT!! "

James fell back, the bright flash of violet light burning into his midsection. He gurgled deep in his throat, slender hands clawing at his chest with an untold desperation. A Hufflepuff girl screamed, and Sirius staggered to his feet, a grim sneer stretching his tanned cheeks.

"FINITE INCANTATEM! " The familiar voice shot silence into the crowded stairwell, and James fell to his knees, gasping for breath as the light faded into nothingness.

"Professor McGonagall-!" Sirius gasped, his face going pale. The severe-faced witch stood not three yards from him, a small Gryffindor boy at her heels. "He- Professor, you have to understand, I-"

"I don't want to hear any excuses, Mr. Black!" Her eyes flashed, and Sirius fell silent. "Twenty points from Gryffindor. I would have expected better behavior from the both of you."

Once she turned her back, an unreadable glance passed between the two.

"SI HOC ADFIXUM IN OBICE LEGERE POTES ET LIBERALITER EDUCATUS ET NIMIS PROPINQUUS ADES-"

"DETENTION!"

James shut up instantly.

McGonagall turned back, something that looked suspiciously like a smile masquerading as a frown tugging at her lips. "All of you, go to class!" she ordered. The bystanders obediently began scattering from the area, as the duel was over and they had Herbology in five minutes.

"You two know where to report for detention. Tonight, directly after dinner." McGonagall eyed the two "combatants" suspiciously. "I'm sure I have no idea why you would be seeking detention tonight, but should I hear of any unusual activity from Mr. Filch, don't expect to be playing against Ravenclaw next week. I won't hesitate to suspend either of you from the house team." She paused. "Even though the Cup does depend on this match."

Both James and Sirius looked suitably repentant, gathering up their things. But once the door swung shut behind the lady professor, those sulky masks melted into grins and chuckling.

"Good call getting her, Peter," James congratulated, mussing up the shorter boy's hair as he straightened his glasses. "We were starting t' run out of ideas, weren't we, Padfoot?"

"That was a good one, the choking," Sirius grinned, sweeping his long raven hair back from his face. "Even though she did find us out, it was a good laugh, the looks on all their faces."

"It might have been a bit more convincing if you had chosen to use real spells," a fourth voice commented dryly. "Though you would have lost more House points that way."

"Our thinking exactly, Moony." James finished stacking his textbooks, then bounded up the first set of stairs. "To Herbology, then? We're cutting the chicory today, and we'll need to pocket some, or this entire detention is going to be wasted."

"So we are going t' map out that part of the third floor?" Sirius craned his neck to peer up at his best friend, one dark brow raised in curiousity. "That's going t' take some doing, Prongs. What's the plan?"

There was a pause.

"So, Moony, what's the plan?"

Remus laughed softly, shaking his head at the plaintive pout on Jamess face. "You want Peter and I to do the mapping while you two are in detention?" he queried, shouldering his bag and making his way up the stairway. "You and Sirius can get the map from Filch's office and leave it by the statue of the witch on your way to the trophy rooms. Peter and I will take the chicory and go, if you leave the Cloak for us."

"Umm..." Peter tugged on James's sleeve, craning his neck with an apologetic smile. "If you don't mind the asking... why do we need the chicory? What's it good for?"

"You missed that class, didnt you?" James patted his arm. "Dont ask me, I spent it hiding from Padfoot and his teenaged mandrakes."

"Oh, Prongs, they still long for you..." Sirius purred. James shuddered.

"When chicory is enchanted correctly, it will open any lock without leaving behind the traces that a regular spell would. It won't do to have them able to track us down from the third floor." Remus pushed the door open, waving the three through.


The bell for Herbology began to ring, and with a whoop, James tore off down the hallway. Peter chased, oversized robes flopping behind him. Sirius swore briefly and filthily, then turned to go.

"Sirius, wait a minute."

Two thin, delicate hands closed on the front of his robes, and Sirius turned back slowly, pale blue eyes wide with arrested surprise. "What... what is it?" he whispered, heart jumping into his throat, breath catching deep in his lungs.

"You're filthy... hold still." Remus's hands darted over his robes, brushing off the dust from the mock scuffle in the stairwell. Sirius remained obediently motionless, struggling to remain straight-faced, biting the inside of one cheek to keep from breaking out into a goofy smile of relief.

"There." Remus stood back, chuckling softly, cleaning his hands on his own robes. His dark eyes sparkled with laughter and fondness. "You two still amaze me... the whole school will be talking about how you tried to kill each other for weeks."

"Well, that's the fun part." Sirius grinned, then squeezed Remuss thin shoulders briefly. "We're gonna be late for class, if..."

"You don't need to get into any more trouble today," Remus agreed.

After a moment of evident discomfort, the bell clanged again and they took off, Sirius's creative cursing scalding the walls as they went.





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Author's Notes on Latin Usage- None of those "spells" actually were spells, as Remus pointed out. However, they actually are Latin, and amusing phrases at that.

Casu Consulto- Accidentally on purpose.
Braccae Tuae Aperiuntur- Your fly is open.
Ita Erat Quando Hic Adveni- It was that way when I got here.
Canis Meus Id Comedit- My dog ate it.
Si Hoc Adfixum In Obice Legere Potes Et Liberaliter Educatus Et Nimis Propinquus Ades- If you can read this bumper sticker, you are both very educated and far too close.

Thanks for those goes to The Magical Worlds Of Harry Potter, and the information on chicory comes from The Sorcerer's Companion.
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